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Glenda58
10-01-2007, 08:54 PM
When I was younger it was sexual the feel of the cloths and the taboo that it was wrong if I got caught. Then as I got older the fantasy of being a girl and doing things that girls did. Putting on makeup, having breast, long hair, getting my ears pierced. Knowing all the time if my wife caught me that it would end my marriage and it did.

Now older entering my sixties I dress to pass. To act and do things women do. I shop dressed try on cloths go out to eat go to shows. I even work around my home outside dressed. I have been Madam, Dear, Honey.I have been call a lady. I have mistaken for someones wife at a TG meeting. This all made me feel good that I could pass. But for what why do I or us need to dress up. Most of the we are alone when we dress or we must hurry to get it in before someone see us then we quick change back to our male selves. We hind our cloths. We're ashame of what we do. We fear that if we are fond out that we could lose our jobs our families and friends.

Some of us have SOs that accept us but not in front of them. And SOs accept and do things with you. I think that's wonderful for you. But most of us our SO would leave us in a heart beat if they fond out.

We have the forum to talk to others but again we are alone at home. I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life just to dress up. I want someone to be with as I get older. Going to meetings and shopping is fun and talking to my friends that I have met here has been wonderful but I want more from my life.

I will support everyone in this forum and encourage them to venture out. The feelings can't be described in words the first time you public. That first time in a mall shopping for a dress and trying it on and having the SA ask if you want to try on this other outfit she fond for you..

Sorry for the long thread just trying to find out what I want to do next.:sb:

docrobbysherry
10-01-2007, 09:03 PM
Glenda, I'm where u r, kinda. I'm about your age. Unmarried, and have started some dating. At this point, I think I will eventually have to make a choice between dressing and being alone, or giving it up for a woman to get old with. I had hoped to find, a CD accepting GG on this, or a similar site. I now realise THAT is not going to happen. A fickle CD, just what the world needs! I hate that I'm so picky. But, can't change that, any more than my CD desires!

ArleneRaquel
10-02-2007, 12:44 AM
Because I feel that I am a woman, I love to look sexy. I also love to be flirty & seductive. :happy: :love: & :hugs: Beyonce Welch - Sexy African - American FemmeFatale :drink: Chardonnay & Stay Healthy :happy:

Patricia Danielle
10-02-2007, 12:56 AM
I dress for comfort and don't worry to much about what other people think. The only person I worry about is my SO and she is pretty supportive.

My Lady Marsea
10-02-2007, 01:10 AM
I'm your age too. Just waiting for the divorce to finalize and get out of Dodge. Can't get my start over grubstake 'till then. I've found and fell in love with the women I'm going to die with...ME. I don't try to understand me and am not embarresed to be seen as (with) me. Me doesn't have to decide if I can dress only certain times and can push the bubble 'till it burst LOL. I would however like to share me and all I have to offer with a no judgement GG or T-Girl, but if it doesn't happen I'll still have the perfect person to be with.

Wifeofacrosser
10-02-2007, 01:31 AM
It breaks my heart to hear that our society is so unaccepting that for a lot of C.D's it is a choice of being alone or not being true to yourself. I hope that you find love with someone who is willing to work through their own stereotypes and move beyond what society has dictated to us.

Deanna2
10-02-2007, 02:30 AM
Although I wear femme style gear a lot, I'm not sure that I count myself as a crossdresser. The clothes I wear are all mine. And I am never cross when I wear them.

Eileen
10-02-2007, 03:57 AM
First Glenda you do not look 60ish. Yes it is nice to have soport groups and such, but the are not a substitute for a friend in the flesh. We can make just about anything happen if we put our minds to it. We just need to decide what we want and go for it.

Eileen

ArleneRaquel
10-02-2007, 03:59 AM
You are So right :happy: :love: & :hugs: Beyonce Welch - Famous Belly Dancer & :drink: er of Chardonnay :heehee: :happy:

Kate Simmons
10-02-2007, 04:18 AM
Wow Glenda, I could give a complex, convoluted in depth soul searching answer but think I'll just say that it seems like a good idea at the time whenever I do it.;):battingeyelashes::happy:

Angie G
10-02-2007, 04:31 AM
Glenda I sorry I don't know what to tell you but I do wish you luck ih your finding someone :hugs:
Angie

malika.cd
10-02-2007, 05:47 AM
Glenda I sorry I don't know what to tell you but I do wish you luck ih your finding someone :hugs:
Angie
I always feel since childhood that i am a gal...i love to dressup like a sexy gal ...and tease guys around me with my arousing beauty...lol.....i m a gal trapped in male body.

Malika

DAVIDA
10-02-2007, 06:32 AM
Hi Glenda!
I am one of the very lucky ones. Jean is and has always been very supportive of me. I do know what it is like not having anyone at all. The last 17 years have been very enlightening.

TxKimberly
10-02-2007, 07:10 AM
Why - The 64 Million dollar question. Damned if I know Glenda, but if you figure it out would you please share the answer with me?

Karan
10-02-2007, 07:29 AM
I don't know why. However, I do know how I feel when i put together a cute outfit from the shoes to the hair and i look in the mirror and I see a reflection of a relatively nice looking lady. I have this tremendous inner joy in my heart and peaceful feeling that no other thing in my life has brought. This is not to say that my life and family have not brough me untold happiness, it is just not the same as this feeling from within.

Does this make sense? I don't know.

Have a wonderful day.

Karan



Karan

Suzy Harrison
10-02-2007, 08:24 AM
I used to wonder 'why' years ago, but now I just accept that it will forever be a (growing) part of me. If you believe in reincarnation, as I do, then I wonder if we have had many past lives as females and that's why we are attracted to it.

Jilmac
10-02-2007, 09:00 AM
glenda, you're not alone with your feelings of isolation. i'm 62, been dressing since 15, still not passable, and still stay at home when i dress. but the fact still remains that i love to know my feminine side. i've been to only two tg meetings in my life, where i was totally accepted by the other girls. i was married twice, first one ended because she couldn't handle my dressing. second wife stuck with me and knew about my dressing, but i still had to do it secretly. you ask why we dress, i can't speak for anyone but me on that. i've always felt that dressing allows me to do things that society has stereotypically deprived men of. things such as crying in public, expressing emotions, hugging, and openly experssing affection, without being judged or "labeled". consider yourself lucky to be passable enough to try on clothes in the womens dressing rooms, and to be called maam by your neighbors. i'm still bound by society's stigma attached to anybody who is transgendered. perhaps some day i too will have the courage to put on a dress wig and makeup, and walk down the street, proud to be a woman.
forever, Jill

Daintre
10-02-2007, 09:26 AM
I really don't think anyone can give you a definite answer to the why do we dress. If I knew the why, I could maybe take steps to stop it. In my case there is a need to dress, not dressing puts me in a very dark place. It has cost me so much in that I lost my soul mate, I am alone and I do not see any change coming.

Glenda58
10-02-2007, 10:39 PM
Are we hiding from our male selves because we can't make it as men. And dressing is our escape. Or our we just getting away from the stress that comes from having to do all things right as a man that we dress as women to getaway from it all for awhile till the next day where we start all over again as a male. Don't get me wrong I still love to dress up and more than likely never give it up. As I write this thread I'm getting ready to go out tomorrow.

TxKimberly
10-03-2007, 09:45 AM
Are we hiding from our male selves because we can't make it as men. And dressing is our escape. Or our we just getting away from the stress that comes from having to do all things right as a man that we dress as women to getaway from it all for awhile till the next day where we start all over again as a male. Don't get me wrong I still love to dress up and more than likely never give it up. As I write this thread I'm getting ready to go out tomorrow.

I don't think its as simple or easy as that. As anyone who has read my posts here knows, I spent over a decade active duty Army - I CAN, have, and do "make it as a man". It's not a "hiding from being a man" thing, it's not that I am running or hiding from something. I think it's more that I think men should be allowed to "be pretty". Why should only women be allowed to have beautiful hair, or wear beautiful things, or use makeup? When I try and look atit objectivly, I don't see a problem with a man that wants to look pretty sometimes.

nikki_t
10-03-2007, 10:08 AM
Because it's downright fun!! :D

ElaineB
10-03-2007, 10:14 AM
I don't think I could name any one reason why I started. I was just a little kid then!

However... the situation today is different and I try to be honest with myself and ... honestly ... it is at least partly boredom and partly sexual frustration. I am one of those high-flying types and "normal life" is painfully slow for me at times.

When I am out doing something else I really like (for example, walking on the Great Wall of China), CDing doesn't even cross my mind.

If I could ever meet a woman who is really compatible with me, it would be interesting to see if the thought of CDing also never came up again.

Deborah Jane
10-03-2007, 12:05 PM
Because i enjoy it!!:D

TiffanyTgirl
10-04-2007, 05:35 AM
Dressing starts out as curiosity, then sometimes sexual stimulation, then habit, then ... because we want to. For me , it has become a "my time" thing. Male persona gets shelved with all "his" stresses, problems, and issues. Girl time means I get to concentrate on something and someone else. Anyway, that is my take on it.

janet1234
10-04-2007, 08:50 AM
and everyone else, I do it because I like it. If my SO throws a fit, I will probably purge or store away until the next time. I like it. I like it.

Ruth
10-04-2007, 03:02 PM
Several people have said, and I agree, that I do it as a way of stepping away from my male persona for a while.
The man side of me has a successful career, a wife and family, but he somehow needs more, that being a man doesn't provide, or allow. Dressing allows him to go into his emotions in a way that he can't as a man; and it allows him to pamper and preen himself in ways that a man isn't 'supposed' to do, and to try to look pretty.
It sounds very self indulgent put this way, but I guess I was raised to believe that men didn't do these things, even though deep down I needed/wanted to. So the way into these activities was by pretending to be a woman.

Mary Jane
10-04-2007, 05:42 PM
I crossdress because I CAN and it is fun and enjoyable. I gave up trying to figure out any other reasons.

Rita B
10-04-2007, 06:36 PM
I agree with Katrina that it makes me feel like the woman that I know I am inside. I dress to be happy, to feel alive, to feel somewhat more attractive...and Glenda, never think for one moment that the reason that we xdress is that we can't make it as a man. All of us have made it as "men". We have been fathers, and husbands, and have served in the military, and will continue to do so. All I know, is when I dress, or get together with other xdressers I have a sense of peace and of inner energy that I can't find any other way. It takes a real strong person to take on both gender personas and perform heroically in each. I think that we are very special people. Let's all give ourselves a pat on the back

Love to all from an old gal

Rita B

janet1234
10-04-2007, 11:05 PM
""I crossdress because I CAN and it is fun and enjoyable. I gave up trying to figure out any other reasons.""
I second that also I just plain like it.

sterling12
10-04-2007, 11:07 PM
If you talked to a million of us, you would get a million stories, and probably a million reasons "why." I think you have to try and understand your own personal truths...your own personal why.

I think that's all part of the package of self-acceptance. We humans keep on evolving every day. As we change, hopefully we will find some sort of accommodation in our lives.

Age wise, I'm not far behind you, Joanie has loved and been loved, many times. Probably wouldn't do one thing different. I now figure that since I've already had a lot of fun and enjoyed the company and companionship of a Significant Other, maybe that's enough. If it doesn't happen again, that's OK. I begin to believe that Joanie is all The Girlfriend I may need.

I can provide some solace and perhaps some hope. I have met many older TG Persons down here. Some of them go back a very long way within the movement. Here's the very odd part, almost everyone of them has a female or male companion/friend. Many of these Gals are TS, many are presenting as a woman 24/7. It seems after they reach self-acceptance, then magically someone appears. Someone who can accept that female persona, someone who enjoys it. Maybe it's because they have finally become comfortable with who they are, and allowed themselves to be loved.

Peace and Love, Joanie