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JOEY88
10-07-2007, 03:50 PM
Ive been feeling like no one knows what I'm going through ,in the past few month Ive been looking at my inner self every thing i have been suppressing for so long urges to dress ,feelings, memories and it all just feels like to much,i have bipolar 2 disorder ,general anxiety,major depression,learning disorder,social and academic problems and serious impairment in social functioning and to top it off I'm trans gender,just feel like i will never be OK thanks every one just venting

charllote34
10-07-2007, 03:53 PM
Joey , the more you surpress the more depressed you will get , be at peace with yourself my friend .Trust me life is too short to worry cx x

Shelly Preston
10-07-2007, 04:00 PM
Hi Joey

You may want to consider joining the mental and physical health issues section

Marla S
10-07-2007, 04:05 PM
I agree with Charlotte try to be at peace with yourself.

From a laypersons view on psychology I'd say you are a bit over-diagnosed.
See yourself a bit more positive. Someone who has depressive moods because he is not happy with himself will have all the trouble you described to a more or less extend (me included).

Be you, be proud of yourself, look for the positive aspects.
It's no alway easy, but it does work.

Yes, I get very sad sometimes.

Julie York
10-07-2007, 04:23 PM
Feeling pissed off with the world in general, exhibits itself in the ways you describe actually. All that social stuff, academic bleargh, relationship bleargh, it can be a bi-product of the way you feel, not necesarilly the cause.

It's difficult when you suffer from depression to seperate the cart from the horse.

Like Shelly P said. There's section on the forum which you might find helpful.

Good luck with that.:thumbsup:

Karren H
10-07-2007, 04:24 PM
NO.... rarely...

GypsyKaren
10-07-2007, 04:31 PM
Well, you're certainly not alone, I have severe bi-polar, PTSD, plus I'm TS and about to have the surgery. Suppressing doesn't work, so you might as well get off of that road. Accept who you are and embrace yourself for it, life does go on and it can get better, you just have to have an open heart so you can see it when it happens, and it will.

Karen Starlene

AmberTG
10-07-2007, 04:48 PM
Joey, most of those things that you describe can all be symptoms of Gender Dysphoria. The problems with learning, general anxiety, social and academic problems, these things can all be caused by serious depression, and serious depression is a major by-product of gender dysphoria. You have to start at the root of the problem in order to deal with all the other issues. First, you have to start by understanding that Gender Identity Disorder is a recognized medical condition, not some strange, horrible, perversion. You have to understand that it's not your fault, and that it's OK to be this way. Coming to terms with who you are is the first step toward dealing with the other issues that you have.

Julie York
10-07-2007, 04:51 PM
First, you have to start by understanding that Gender Identity Disorder is a recognized medical condition, not some strange, horrible, perversion. .

Go on. Spoil it for everyone.


:D

docrobbysherry
10-07-2007, 06:10 PM
Sounds like u need drugs and lots of 'em! Seriously, I know nothing about "gender disorder", however, my ex had( has), the bi-polar problem. When she took her PRESCRIBED meds, she was fine. When she didn't, it was pretty obvious. I would come home and she suddenly became this incredible insane screaming bitch! Go see a doc and get some meds. Take them when u need them, you'll FEEL MUCH BETTER!

Jodi
10-07-2007, 06:53 PM
Rarely am I sad, and if sadness occurrs, it has nothing to do with cd'ing. I go by the adage that 99% of what goes on around me is out of my control; therefore, don't let those things get to you. The one thing I have in my control is how I react to the things around me, and I choose to be positive and happy.

Jodi

angelfire
10-07-2007, 06:55 PM
Quite honestly Joey, before I'd go for the drugs route, I would get a second opinion. If you say a therapist and he diagnosed you with all those things, thats fine, but there are some docs out there who mis-diagnose, sometimes just to push drugs on people. So before you just hop on board, I would try seeing a different doctor for a second opinion. It won't hurt, and who knows, maybe he will have a solution without drugs. For example, perhaps by dealing with the bi-polar disorder, it could eliminate the depression. Coming to terms with your CDing will certainly help.

I wish you luck whatever you choose, and if you want to talk, don't hesitate to send me a PM.

Kris
10-07-2007, 07:23 PM
Rarely am I sad, and if sadness occurrs, it has nothing to do with cd'ing. I go by the adage that 99% of what goes on around me is out of my control; therefore, don't let those things get to you. The one thing I have in my control is how I react to the things around me, and I choose to be positive and happy.

Jodi

Ah, spoken from a wise wise woman! I couldn't have said it better myself.

:hugs: Kris

sterling12
10-07-2007, 10:47 PM
Well, I am very concerned about Joey! I am concerned about possible consequences.

It sounds like you are currently, or have been under the care of a professional. Somebody else said: "Get a second opinion," and that seems like a good idea. Medical People should have to live up to the standards of a trusted mechanic: "If the problem is not getting better....time to find someone who can fix it!"

If I read you correctly, I think you are feeling yourself sinking. The Depression can get worse! If your having any thoughts about doing something to end your life, get help now!

We have too many of us that get depressed and end their lives, lost a Sista in Orlando not very long ago. Please don't become another statistic! Your recent posting kind of worried me, this one worries me a lot more.

Peace and Love, Joanie

Wenda
10-08-2007, 01:47 AM
Well, I am very concerned about Joey! I am concerned about possible consequences.

It sounds like you are currently, or have been under the care of a professional. Somebody else said: "Get a second opinion," and that seems like a good idea. Medical People should have to live up to the standards of a trusted mechanic: "If the problem is not getting better....time to find someone who can fix it!"

If I read you correctly, I think you are feeling yourself sinking. The Depression can get worse! If your having any thoughts about doing something to end your life, get help now!

We have too many of us that get depressed and end their lives, lost a Sista in Orlando not very long ago. Please don't become another statistic! Your recent posting kind of worried me, this one worries me a lot more.

Peace and Love, Joanie
I'm with you girl! My eldest son (who used to dress) and I have discussed this at length. The medical profession doesn't take depression all that seriously. If you are not suicidal, then the kid with the sore throat will bump you from the top of the list.
I don't believe that Crossdressing is a mental disorder, but I have noticed that it is more prevalent in males who are dealing with depression, so there is a connection.
If retiring into your femme personality is comfortable for you, then you just go there. If you feel like you need some less public feedback, please feel free to PM me.
Please take care, wenda. :hugs:

Claire3
10-08-2007, 01:55 AM
Im truly content with who i am

Joy Carter
10-08-2007, 03:16 AM
Get some treatment for what ever it is Joey. Your life is waiting. :hugs:

Sheri 4242
10-08-2007, 03:55 AM
Joey,

There are some marvelous medications out there for the conditions you mention, but you really need to sit down with a competent professional (to determine "if" you need them, what you need, and then to get the meds and learn, in conjunction with the medications, ways to cope with and/or overcome the mental health conditions you list). No one avenue will be a panacea! When you supress your core being, that can, indeed, feed the depression, but it takes a professional working directly with you to sort out what's what -- it is the old "chicken and egg" analogy of which came first. For example, do you actually have a true manic-depressive dosorder, and is that the root of your anxiety -- and, moreover, how does your crossdressing feed into the whole thing?!! It can be daunting to face these issues -- especially if you are trying to do it by yourself!!! Come out of the dark and get highly competent treatment!!! As Joy told you . . .


Get some treatment . . . (y)our life is waiting.

Melanie85
10-08-2007, 04:23 AM
Ive been feeling like no one knows what I'm going through ,in the past few month Ive been looking at my inner self every thing i have been suppressing for so long urges to dress ,feelings, memories and it all just feels like to much,i have bipolar 2 disorder ,general anxiety,major depression,learning disorder,social and academic problems and serious impairment in social functioning and to top it off I'm trans gender,just feel like i will never be OK thanks every one just venting

I used to have Dysthymic Disorder (chronic depression) from early childhood onwards. In my teens it got worst. I became emotionally dead and I lived so much of my life alone I'm now finding it very hard to have deep emotional relationships with people. I used to be on anti-depressants, which seemed to work. Then I read anti-Ds not meant to be taken as long term measure and most aren't tested beyond 6 weeks, so I stopped like 6 months ago. Felt no difference, except when I tried to figure out why was I still so emotionally messed up (so I could have more meaningful relationships with others) I slowly realized I was transsexual and had gender dysphoria (well I always kinda know I was trans, I just stopped being in denial). The more you accept your transsexuality the more it will get better. The more introspective you are and the more you try to find out what's causing your depression, the more you try to fix it, the more you might uncover the hurt that your mind tried to avoid in the first place by shutting down emotionally, the better you will understand how it all works, the more you will understand just how deeply gender dysphoria is affecting you.
Find a trans-friendly therapist...
And don't wait for other people to rescue you, everyone that was supposed to help me failed me and in the end I had to help myself. (apparently depression in children must not exist. Even taking 2 hours to find the courage to speak, to a psychologist in a private quiet room does not constitute cause for concern or further study... But they did give me hunger-destroying ritalin for my ADD... imagine force-feeding yourself french fries and chicken nuggets on lunchtime while not being able to produce saliva to swallow properly because you have almost no psychological desire to eat... and imagine the drug barely working... but I am totally digressing now...)


Of course, I could be wrong... Maybe you have some other problem, but I'm betting my money on gender dysphoria... always a fundamental cause of anguish


EDIT: Also, learn to cry it helps...

Anyways, I'm kinda stuck myself, I need to find the courage to cd more and I need to find a good therapist

I used to be so self-disciplined, and I was able to push myself to work on my weaknesses, to improve myself. And it worked back then when I was recovering from depression and getting my life to where most other people my age were at and improving my grades. But now it's harder to do... have I gotten lazy or is it just harder? Either way, self-discipline and the strong desire for self-improvement are both good traits to have... most important is introspection.... Hmmm..... perhaps you just need a good hug? How many people you know that you *really* consider to be close friends? Supportive people you can share your troubles with?
I know 2 people I could (and know I'm trans) but doing so requires too much emotional vulnerability, something I never learned, and that depression deprived from me... so, I have no one really... If it's the same with you, then get some supportive friends... good friends are priceless...