i hear you girlfreind
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i hear you girlfreind
My wife goes out of her way to pretend that "that part of me" does not exist. Every time a public TS person is portrayed on TV, she goes out of her way to comment in a very negative fashion.
I wonder is she loves me or the lifestyle that my career affords her.
My wife doesn't know that I crossdress and I don't know what her reaction would be if she found out. I have only tried her skirts or dresses when she has been out or away, without make-up or wig which I don't have anyway. For my full make-overs I have been to professional crossdressing services when I have been travelling alone on business.
My wife Knows and has the feelings of "You do what you will hun, Just be faithfull..). She really does not like it, But she accepts me out of love.. IF I pressured her, then she would maybe partake, but not too enthusiastically at least At first at, unless it makes Her world better.. Like Sex for example.. She may go for it. But I am not in a hurry to push it right now.. She knows and STILL accepts me. She has even hinted at giving me a few makeup lessons, due to the fact that she has said that I kinda look like a young teen "girl", trying to learn makeup.. Hehe.. Actually she has not seen most of my best photos..
Anyways.. My 2 cents..
My wife has known for over 15 yrs now. She hates it with a pasion, wishing it would go away. While I do dress at will or wear lingerie under male clothes, including breast forms, she just tolerates it but it comes up occasionally as to how much she hates it. She is forever pytting me down and saying I am weird.
Early on we had the big discussion - twice. Yes, she knows, but as far as she is concerned it has ended. The physical dressing did end for many years, but I could never stop thinking about it.
Then internet came along, I was (am) obsessed with going to crossdressing sites. Over the years I would try on her clothes (too small for me), but never go all the way. Last year, I started to dress all the way, but I did it with my clothes, and my makeup. She does not know that I am dressing again, and if she found out, she would be rather put out.
BF
My SO is totally for my CD'ing and understands and supports me! My only problem is she wants to buy me too much femme items, I kid you not! We do have a blast with it and I have to plans to do this full time, I'm just a guy in a dress!
my wife has known about mitch for about 18 months although i think she suspected well before that. She is unenthusiastic and does not want me to dress around her, store my clothes at home or take the risk of being 'discovered' by friends, family and neighbours. She recognises that it is something that is part of me and prefers that i do it out of her sight. When I go out (which is on average twice a week), she is sometimes ok and sometimes hostile. there are no easy answers - i wish there were ...
mitch
She likes me dressed because it relaxes me. Many times she will ask me to dress so I can relax. Even this morning she is pushing it with our son at work, but I want to ride the Harley. I am a better person dressed as most of us are. Her opinion: It's only cloths.
I told my wife after 10yrs of marriage. We are married 37yrs. She wants no part of my femme side. We very seldom talk about it. I hang some of my clothes in our common closet. I get out about 1x a month if lucky. Between work and family events it is hard. For the last 9yrs I have been going to Provincetown during the Fantasia fair for 3-4 nites. She hates me going away. I love my wife very much. I think if I had told her before we married, we wouldn't have gotten married. But at that time I didnt know how strong this part of me was. I often think if I had told her before that my children and my beautiful grandkids wouldnt be around. That would have been a terrible thing.
I told my wife long before we were married and she is accepting and supportive. She took me on my first outing in 2000 and last spring when we went to Niagra Falls she suggested I go out dressed with her for a day and take one leg of out train trip dressed. We had a great time!
Now she also, in the past, has said she wishes this was not part of me and there are times when she lets me know she needs her space from it and I respect that. She also needs to know that I am always still her man and that I am willing to compromise with her, as she is with me.
A month ago, as many of you know, my wife had an aneurysm which led to a massive stroke. She has been recovering for the past month and has made wonderful progress. She has regained most of her memory and we have a wonderful mental and emotional connection while she is recovering. Crossdressing has been at the bottom of my priority list recently, as you can imigine, and I had no intentions of even mentioning it. But the other day she turned to me and said she was so thankful I had been by her side during all this and she wanted to get something special for me. She then asked me what size I am now? Her memory still comes and goes and I not sure what she is asking and say "What size of what, Angel?" and she said "What size jumper do you wear now?" My wife is so wonderful, so how could I not possibly be willing to compromise with her?
My wife knew before we married and seemed supportive at the time.
Later on it became much less so, last discussion didn't going well at all.
She did make some comments when we moved to our current house that gives me some hope she may be more comfortable with it. She pointed out the church we're likely to go to has support groups and is very supportive of LGBT issues and has some local support groups meet out of it.
Not sure if I'd go full time.
Interesting thread. Also interesting to discover that I am not the only one who’s wife tolerates my wearing women’s clothes, but wished I didn’t and would draw the line at going out with me and both of us using the ladies restroom when I’m impersonating a female. She would also balk if I suggested wearing a bra, wig, earrings, and make-up. Thus, competing in the costume contest with my wife at a convention would be an ideal "excuse" to appear in public as a woman. I am focusing on our vacations to distant locations so I am not likely to be recognized. and going out en femme with her, using a ladies restroom. and dining while presenting as a female would be a big turn-on.
Sounds like underdressing is now your best option. I too have wanted to wear femme things for many years – I remember “trying” my sister’s training bras and falsies 50+ years ago. Then crossdressing subsided, except on business trips. Now that I have retired, business trips are non-existent, but the opportunity to underdress has increased. My desire to crossdress has also increased as sex has decreased and my wife’s wardrobe has become very masculine – no sexy lingerie, pantyhose. or skirts (except for dress up occasions) and she removes her bra as soon as she gets home from work. It seems she doesn’t want to be dress as a woman, but I so! Underdressing suggestions that my wife has “bought-in to” are listed in my post on 6/6 in the For Those Who Underdress… thread, so I have not repeated them here.
The first time I went out en femme was in daylight on a business trip. I had gotten lingerie, pantyhose, shoes, earrings. and a sleeveless yellow dress locally. I had a transformation and changed to femme clothes at the salon. Afterward I walked on the main drag. I remember going to a theater there, and then driving back to the hotel. I also remember I was real nervous going out as a woman, but it was super and that experience made me want to go out en femme again.
Wearing panties, pantyhose, a short slip, and women's pull-on pants is now "natural". The farther I go, the farther I want to go! As my wife doesn’t want to see me “dressed”, it was a significant step when she saw me wearing panties, a slip, thigh high nylons and a garter belt in our hotel room on a trip last year. I was “underdressing” when we were in public though, as she doesn’t want me to be en femme when I’m with her.
thats where i am at with my wife. though i am almost always wearing panties only exception is not a work, also i get to wear non obvious fem pj's as for full time not why i like or enjoy this i like the short term enjoyment of dressing being a man for my wife and kids i what i want mostly.. just need some gurly time :) this is when it is no ask no tell
jessica
We have been married for some thirty seven years. I outted myself to my wife about fifteen years ago. She has told me she would not have married me if she had known about my crossdressing prior to our wedding. Since then, she is somewhat understanding. I dress in the house every day. She does help me shop for clothing. I am careful to purchase her something whenever I am buying something for myself.
41 years here, and I'm sure she wouldn't have married me if she knew then that I wanted to wear women's clothes. Although my desire to appear as a woman is long-standing, it is more acute now. It was a big step when she saw me wearing panties, thigh high support nylons. a garter belt, and slip on a trip last year. Panties, pantyhose, and a slip are now customary attire for me with women's pull-on slacks and a top. Although she bought most of my femme clothes and has said "wear what you want at home", she is still opposed to my impersonating a female in public. I'm looking for a suitable venue and a way to go out with her in en femme.
My wife has made comments before like "my gig" or "my acting out" in a light hearted manner. But she vasillates from being very uninterested in discussing it to making comment that I don't use her clothes, but instead buy my own. I do have high quality glue on forms and we have had sex while I am in some great lingerie, and she liked it, but says she doesn't want to do it all the time. I wish she did like it all the time, and I love the forms and the feeling of the weight and movement, and of course the fit that the lingerie gives about my torso and breasts. I love the soft lip stick on my lips when we kiss. I really like when she rubs her breasts and hands on my breast forms. But too often she is not interested in that kind of sex.
My wife tolerant Cindy ,sometimes she said she feels like she is competition with Cindy like there is another women in the house and dose not like Cindy's cloths in the closet close to hers cloths she will have something good to say about Cindy when she is in a good mode but when we have a argument Cindy comes up or my Friends come up or the clubs comes and yes she calls me a fag or she feels that I am gay.
LA CINDY LOVE
We're not married, but I consider ourselves married at this point.
Very simliar situation here to yours, and I know its only based on ignorance of cd's. Can't even bring up that subject which I resent to a degree. Can't bring up other subjects also that have nothing to do w/ cd-ing, been telling her its getting old real fast, conservatism has its place.
If the shoe was on the other foot, I would be open to what she had to say and felt. Guess the ignorance of it just scares the hell out of some SO's.
My wife Lindsey likes my en femme side,is a 100% supportive and knows has a "girlfriend" now that she loves to death including her friends.
My wife understands it (Raven) is a part of Me ,but does not wish to Meet "Her", I also wear panties 24/7 and do not own any male underwear. However I have been buying womans jeans now and She has told Me She likes how they fit Me (Yes the one thing She sees Me wear) When We go shopping She will let Me pick out stuff I like and buy it for Me!! as for going full time that is one of Her fears, But I do not think I would dress more than 1 or 2 days a week as I am lazy, lol, and as You all Know dressing is a lot of work!!
I guess I am one of the lucky ones. My wifes enjoys the time we spend together dressed. She has helped me in many ways from hair styles to clothes to just being there if I need her.
The first time I dressed we went to see Jamie Austin and we both had a makeover. I was all brave and decided to leave dressed...I forgot one important thing...to fill the gas tank. We had to stop to get gas and she told me to stay in the car and she would pump it. Funny thing is I am 6' 1" and she is a little over 5' but she was going to take care of me.
She is totally excepting and enjoys going out and meeting other girls. Like I said I feel very lucky
i just read someones post about telling your wife.for me it took about 30 years of marriage to finally tell her .and that was because i was having what i thought was a heart attack.in the end it wasnt that serious but i did have to go to the doctor and change my diet.well that was the warning bell telling me to tell her all about my self and why i like to wear womens clothes. she was very understanding and i was very happy and as a lot of other girls she just doesnt want to see my as a woman.this makes me happy and i can dress and go out on a wednesday evening and meet my girl friends in new york city.:love:phylisanne
She knows, tolerates, accepts, and even encourages. But she does not participate.