one of my happiness triggers

In another thread, SilkyCDresser said that yesterday was the first time she wore makeup. What a coincidence - mine too.

I told my sweet wife that after the morning chores were done I wanted to go upstairs to try out some makeup. I asked her if she would be okay handling things downstairs without me for a while. She said that she would be okay, and encouraged me to have some girly time. (my term, not hers)

It was simply an academic exercise to develop a new skill. At least that's the way it began.

I viewed a couple You-Tube videos, took notes, laid out my stuff and began the process. It was supposed to be a learning and doing experience, much the same as repairing the washing machine or building a deck.

Everything was going according to that plan until I was done with the close-in work with the little mirror and went over to the big mirror to brush out my wig and apply lipstick. It was an emotional moment. I stood there for quite a while, trying to analyze what I was feeling. It wasn't one of those euphoric moments, but it was very calming and quite satisfying. I felt so very ... er ... um ... natural. It felt so 'right' that it was unsettling. It didn't feel weird, naughty, erotic, shameful, or disgusting. It felt like that is what I should be doing, and I was happy I had done it.

I am not yet comfortable telling my wife about it, but I told my therapist about it in today's session.

One of the things we have been working on is getting me from sad to happy. She said that I should think about this as one of my happiness triggers. It may be one of the few really enjoyable things that I allow myself, and not to deny myself the opportunity to do it again.

Best wishes
MsVal

I know the feeling. Euphoric isn't a word I would use...natural or "right" are the words that come to mind.

It's normal Hon. Makeup merely brings out and enhances what is already in there. Call it the "finishing touch" maybe. :battingeyelashes::)

Wow, I remember my experience as being an eye opener because I never had seen myself pretty in any way shape or form until I experienced the first time with a little makeup my heart just said to me. This is all you and always has been and from that moment on I have gained self esteem 10x I love my life and appreciate everyone around me I truly have a new perspective in which I view thinks and I love it...

It's amazing what mascara and a little eyeliner does for transforming the face. It's a shame that only women in society get to perform such transformations on a daily basis.

Happiness triggers for me are when I get compliments from my wife.

MsVal
In no time you will be an expert! I have my exact ritual down now that I wear makeup almost every day. I never thought I could have the patience to do something so detail oriented. I discovered that I like transforming and it usually centers me. Good luck and I hope you find your happy center!
Suzanne

Hi MsVal, it was nice to see me referenced in your opening words :) And I also feel natural and "right" with makeup, so can relate to this weird feeling you experienced. It's good that your wife is accepting and supportive.

:cool:

What a wonderful discovery for you! :)

And if it helps the Happiness Meter up a notch or two, well - why should you (and we) be denied?

Do have fun with it and be prepared to experiment - it does make a considerable difference once you get the knack... and once you have a bit of proficiency with the basics, then look forward to another eureka moment when you successfully apply false eyelashes for the first time... :battingeyelashes:

You still have so much happiness to look forward to... :D

Katey x

MsVal what a wonderful post, I know what you felt, me too.
Hugs

Val,
Makeup does make quiet a difference, if it's your first time ! If your wear a wig as well the guy does disappear and leaves you wanting to work on it and do it again !

my happiness trigger: putting in my breastforms...that is when I have the biggest smile on my face

I only came out to myself just a year ago but know exactly what you are experiencing. Dressing as a girl just feels right to me. It's hard to put into words what I'm feeling, but just know that it's right and a big part of who I am.

For me it was the wig. I'd played around with eye liner in the past, and liked the result, but putting the wig on was the first time I felt like a woman. I cried.

Charlene and Nikki, you both look great, by the way!

Hi Val ! I know exactly what you mean. I recall my initiation into the world of makeup and hair. When I was done, I got very teary....almost ruined my make up! It was a feeling of normalcy, of balance and congruity, the outside finally matched the inside! So happy that you finally were able to have this experience. And yes, it is a happy trigger for many. I wear tinted moisturizer everyday. Not so much that people notice, but I know it is there, and it is great to have that as part of my morning ritual.

Take care,

Erin