Putting myself 'out there', with work, and... comedy shows?

I've been living full time as a woman and undergoing medical transition since mid 2018, and socially female (while just cross dressing) since 2014. And I am fortunate enough to be able to pass pretty well as a cisgender woman.

But recently I have really been pushing my boundaries in two areas, in terms of putting myself into public situations, where I frequently have to interact with strangers.

Three months ago, I got my first job as a woman. Got hired as a part time cashier and floor sales associate at a JC Penney retail store in our local mall. I've done well enough there that I have already been promoted to the first step on the management team! My job has me talking directly to customers every day. My customers and coworkers like me and accept me as female. Only a few of them ever even indicate that they realize I am a trans woman. Quite a few of my customers clearly assume I have been female my whole life!

But recently I've added a new exercise in public presentation. A coworker convinced me to join her at open mic comedy nights once a week, at two downtown bars. We get on stage in front of up to 20 or so strangers and do a 5-minute stand up comedy routine. it's been fun!

Out of the 10-15 aspiring comedians who usually show up, most of us are LGBT, and two of the others are trans women. So my act has often centered on talking openly about my experiences as an out of the closet, queer trans woman. I've gotten a lot of complements on my comedy, and our typical audience members seem to like my shows. But again, it involves a lot of public talking and interacting with strangers. It also involves being out and about in public, on downtown streets, often in daylight. It has been a lot of fun, but definitely challenges my 'comfort zone'.

Well done Ceera

Go, Ceera! Hugs Lana Mae

That sounds great from top to bottom.

Awesome! That all sounds both a bit scary and wonderfully fulfilling. I too, try to push my own boundaries as a growing experience. Thanks for being out there and sharing your self with others and then giving us these success stories. It makes our going out easier because of the path you are paving.

That is so amazing Ceera! Way above & beyond what my comfort zone is right now.

Wish it was closer.. I come watch your routine.

Emily

Congratulations. Sounds great. I?m also pushing the boundaries; but in a different manner. But at the end of the day it?s all the same; becoming comfortable with our femininity as we go out in public.

I am not sure which would frighten me most, customer service or stand-up.

The weirdest part for me, in doing the comedy, is that my comedy act is almost a full inverse of my daily behavior.

At work, or in virtually any other public setting, I try very hard to blend in and be accepted as a cisgender woman. I am successful, much more often than not. I usually dress and behave the same as the straight, cisgender women do. When in public, I rarely swear or talk about 'adult topics'. I'm invariably polite, and am happy and outgoing. I refer to myself as being a widow, and tend to use gender neutral terms in referring to my past self or to the person I was married to. If they assume I was a girl as a child, or that my deceased spouse was male, I see no reason to correct them.

Where it is appropriate, such as when someone misgenders me but seems not to be malicious, or when helping an LGBT customer, I may acknowledge that I am transgender. But again, if they aren't wanting to date me, there is no reason to elaborate on my preferences or gender issues.

But in one of my comedy shows? A lot of the other comics swear or make dirty jokes, so I do too - although my comedy is often milder than their acts. And the fact that I am out and proud as a mostly lesbian, bisexual, transgender woman is often a central factor in my humor. I suppose a factor there is that I am intentionally seeking to have many strangers at once pay attention to me. So I know they may be looking at me and noticing the inconsistencies more.

Ceera, I am so happy for you! You are doing things on your own terms and that is simply wonderful! I am always looking for your updates.

Congrats on continued courage to drive that inner need !!!