bearded dude in a dress, not a crossdresser ??? .....dang rant....

this was directed to crossdressing....so im addressing it as one....i didnt get a handbook when i joined and didnt know i was doing it wrong.

just read a thread and found a comment that if you sport a beard you are not a crossdresser "just a dude in a dress"?? but i grew a beard this summer and have dressed a few times and posted some new avatars and shoe selfies, but according to this post im "just a dude in a dress."

now im not a seasoned veteran here but i have felt comfortable in my time here since ive joined, this statement did not make sense to me, kinda offended me....
padding, wigs, painted nails, clothes, and shoes the full compliment, we are still just dudes. i dont have all that.

does the amount of preparation change what we are, does our monetary capabilities to commit or invest in our dressing change who we are.
i dont think it does, i have been told i would pass, i doubt i would but have felt confident of my accomplishments on some occasions, others not so much but i felt comfortable feeling like me and after years of being judged by society i felt comfortable here, so why would we judge each other.

is it from being here so often and honing our skills that we feel superior to others, unrestricted resources to attain the finer things to use and perfect our look make you better at being a crossdresser? i dont think it does.

i remember seeing a post here about a crossdressing singer on a talent show, she had a full beard and i was jealous of her make up... and her voice was beautiful....

why cant we all support each other.....can we do a refresh....

Hi Mikell, RE: Facial Hair,I checked my copy of the Crossdressers Handbook and it says,

" If It Feels Good Then Do It."

Meanwhile I'm trying to get rid of all facial hair.:daydreaming:

Hahahahahahaha! Sorry, did we just go from being self conscious about being a crossdresser, to being angry when someone says youre NOT one?

I think most of us know that persons remark made no sense. Dont let it ruin your day. :love:

By the way, I get it alot, being f2m, that Im not crossdressing unless Im trying to fool someone yada yada... Well, I couldnt fool a blind guy in a dark room, I just like the clothes that I like, so whatever. :tongueout:

As long as you're wearing the clothes meant for the opposit sex, then you're a crossdresser.
It doesn't matter if it's only one article of clothing or the whole shebang.
It doesn't matter if you're covered in hair or have none at all.
Just tell the offender to kiss your dress covered butt and mind their own business.

CrossDRESSER.com or so it says. unless you plan on or in the process of transitioning, or are going out and attempting to pass or blend, what you do with your clothes and facial hair is YOUR business. I guess I am a crossdresser DUDE in a dress, so be it.

When my wife found out I shaved my pits, wore panties, slept in a nightshirt, and wore a lounger from an online women's site, she said I was a crossdresser. I had to agree with her. If you feel you are, you are.

....you do your thing....we are all at different places with this.....if it makes you happy...do it....

I follow the wisdom of Cartman on this one.

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You have my full support.

Member of the "dude in a dress" club right here. I have a goatee that I am quite fond of and have no intention to shave. I also have a bald head that I do not cover with a wig... Don't even own one. Dressing the way I do is what makes me happy and that's all that matters.

Oh mikell,

There are people in this world who will continue to think they are better than everyone else. Especially when people can hide behind the cowardice of a computer screen, typing away their idiotic thoughts and opinions, the rest of us will continue to have to read them.

As the future wife of a "dude in a dress", who gives a flying f what anyone else thinks.

But true, I wish those who held those opinions kept themselves off the internet. Alas. Our world. :/

Everyone has different ways to express thier femininity and different degrees of femininity.
Its all good

Beard or not, if you dress in women's clothes, you are a crossdresser. But if you have a beard, you will appear to outsiders as a dude in a dress. No big deal. Don't let others define you.

Mikell wearing a dress and supporting a beard means you are a crossdresser but just a little different in your following.:)

Disagreeing, because I can.
I mean would you call a Scotsman in a tartan pleated skirt a crossdresser, or the Samoans in my city when they wear their traditional clothes that look and function like a skirt
In my city, there are a few dudes in dresses (and some look good). When talking to them it's like talking to any other dude.

For ME, a crossdresser does it to emulate what being a female, means to themselves.

So if your wearing a skirt and repairing a diesel motor, I'd call you a mechanic.
If your wearing the same skirt and trying to be feminine, then I would consider you a crossdresser, if you also wore makeup & tried to look "pretty" they I would know you to be further up the crossdressing scale

But really - do you need a label? Just have fun, beard or not

Everyone has their own definitions. This is not surprising, since we have multiple layers and flavors of cross-gender expression that we all try to describe with mostly three words: "crossdresser", "transgender", and "transsexual". So, people usually use one of these words to define themselves and some of them tell others who aren't like them, that they don't belong.

Until we come up with more descriptive ways to define individuals here, we'll keep going 'round in circles about what these words mean.

Also, there's a segment of our membership that doesn't want to be linked with anything to do with "fetish", which was the way that many (most?) people thought of the crossdressing decades ago. People used to think that men who put on dresses and who didn't try to pass as women, did so for kinky reasons. So these members feel that every time the public sees an individual who is obviously a male wearing a dress, that it casts an unfavorable light on the crossdressers who do try to blend in. I suppose the idea is that if someone tries to "pass", they are more serious about it (or more of a woman?) than someone who doesn't.

Just ignore these people.

Hey mikell :)

I think I came across this post...! I wasn't overly happy either reading it... and like you say this dosen't come with a handbook or rule book etc...
The clue is in the name "Cross...Dress"
Pently of guys keep their breads and dress - Why not, right?
Wear what you want and look how you like and feel great on the outside and on the inside :D

KD

Rachelakid - you could call a Scotsman in a tartan pleated skirt a crossdresser, but probably only once! Dae ye no' ken that when we put on the kilt, we instantly become Alpha males, Braveheart and Sean Connery all rolled into one?

I find it interesting that crossdressers really do come from all walks of life and different type of people....... unfortunately that also means there are some damned stupid crossdressers :doh:

Enjoy it and ignore folks who tell you "you are doing it wrong"

I don't have a hair from my nose to my toes. When I do dress as a girl with makeup and wig the whole lot. I am still a dude in a dress. I am the size of an NFL linebacker and close to the same build. Size 22-24 top, 14 bottom. Sister don't worry about labels. If it makes you feel good.

It's really no more or less confronting for the rest of us (the non CD/TG population) to see a bearded man in a dress or a man fully presenting as a woman. Both are a head spin! Both are equal and normal forms of human expression. The term 'crossdresser' just means wearing the clothing of the opposite gender. You can interpret this as you please, as can this forum and everyone on it. Heck, my H dresses like a hooker so he can get his rocks off, yet he still connects with y'all! :eek: In the end, unless you're TS and taking hormones or blessed with a naturally feminine build, most here are 'dudes in a dress'.

Just be you. x

You get to define yourself; what others choose to define you as doesn't matter and is their problem, not yours.
I'm afraid that, as in any other group, there are those who believe their definition applies to everyone; in fact, it applies only to themselves and is an extremely poor way of judging others. It's called prejudice.

I went through the FB offering of the faces of walmart. the examples of semi feminine dress was Far out and a hoot. the {dressers} did not deserve the title crossdresser, unless it was the Barnun and Bailly clown attempt. We would like to think that in our dressing, we are giving honor to our vision of femininty. I dont have a beard, but am built like a pregnant fullback, so what fills my minds eye does not jibe with the actual presentation. This is why this act will never play outside my fortified closet walls. No brag, just fact. So dress and play to that theater of the mind and enjoy.

I'd say "dude in a dress" is an apt description of any kind of cross-dresser :D It's up to yourself and (unfortunately) mother or nature whether or not you look like one.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Talisker

I find it interesting that crossdressers really do come from all walks of life and different type of people....... unfortunately that also means there are some damned stupid crossdressers :doh:

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:D

Mikell - I don't believe you stop becoming a crossdresser just because you grow a beard. In fact, experience here shows that if you purge all your femme clothes and accessories, put away dressing for years at a time, go off and have kids, play golf, sail, do a day job, retire... even after all of that, you're still a crossdresser - as many of us are so acutely aware.

As for the beard thing... ignore it.
There are bearded ladies - and some women can be quite hirsute without artificial aids (my sister-in-law could probably sport a better 'tache than me... :eek:) - there are some very smooth-skinned men... neither changes what they are.
Some folk look like dogs or other animals (I think...) - it doesn't make them the animal they resemble...

I suspect with some folk, not being supportive to others is a kind of subconscious insecurity - "if I can justify to myself that others look worse, that makes me better..." Some people only understand a zero-sum game - I don't believe that's the best use of our energy.

Your avatar is a devilish red right now... is that because you're so angry...? ;)

Katey x