My wife in my dress? What's the deal

So I need some help figuring out what is going on. Here is the deal.

A few nights ago after my wife of 38 years got angry with our troubled, 21 yr old son’s visit. She escaped to the basement where she was cooling off with her crafts. I was allowing her space and went to bed.

I awake at 3 AM, she is not in bed. I go down and find her wine drunk (a little unusual) doing crafts, wearing my red dress, and my print top that did not go with it and all my Barb clothes on the garage floor.

After some drunk, anger talk, she allowed me to put my black skirt that does go with the top and then we had a great time in bed, it had been a while.

I was really turned on by seeing her in my clothes. Whats with me? Is she accepting, or just drunk?

Background: We have had a "don’t ask, don’t tell" situation since she blew up 2 years ago after finding my clothes and photos of me dressed as Barb in the garage. She was very angry and was going to leave me. I agreed to go to counseling

The counselor saw my cross-dressing as a form of escape from my life. I find dressing up exhilarating and liberating.

While I have been interested in CD since late teens, it was only 5 years ago that I decided to buy clothes and use a solon for makeup and hair and had photo by a professional photographer. My activities have included going out to dinner a dozen or so times, traveled by plane as Barb 3 times and had ten or so photo sessions.

What’s the deal?
Barb123

I don't thing any of us are going to be able to tell. Something troubled your wife and drinking may have caused her to react quite openly to what troubled her. There is only one way of knowing and that is to talk to her. I imagine that this talk would certainly fall outside the bounds of don't ask don't tell since her actions brought this about. So give her a little room at first to get going and the morning then just see what is really up.

I have to agree, give her a couple of days to process her thoughts and then bring up the subject. See how she is doing, She may very well need a caring husband to cry on his shoulder.
I hope all works out well.

Not knowing why she was angry with the troubled 21 year old, I'm left wondering if the two are related? From her anger at him, to your clothes, is a big leap, you might try to find the connection there. But for a women to drink that much while she is alone tells me she is really upset, so I would take it slow and easy until I learned why.
Tina B.

She could be looking for something to blame on the trouble. She also could have said to herself "this really sucks maybe I'll go to the garage and get drunk while wearing pretty clothes for a change and let him deal with this!" and used it as her own escape or just to see if it really helped. She also could've been drunk to the point of not being able to tell her clothes from yours, but that seems kind of unlikely since yours are in the garage. Without knowing exactly what was said during the "anger drunk talk" it's hard to know what exactly happened. Was she coherent?

If she was just ask her about it after some time has passed. If she wasn't then you'll likely get an odd stare and an "I don't remember".

p.s. Depending on the type of person she is not doing anything at all may be the best way to get her to talk about it. It is a "pink elephant" after all.

You should probably find out what the dispute between her and your 21 year old son was about.

I do find it very odd that she would put on your clothes.

Her getting drunk like this shows there is something very wrong in her head, and SHE should probably be the one getting counseling.

You need to ask your therapist. Your wife is still reacting to the disclosure that you are a cross-dresser.

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Originally Posted by Barb123

So I need some help figuring out what is going on. Here is the deal.

A few nights ago after my wife of 38 years got angry with our troubled, 21 yr old son’s visit. She escaped to the basement where she was cooling off with her crafts. I was allowing her space and went to bed.

I awake at 3 AM, she is not in bed. I go down and find her wine drunk (a little unusual) doing crafts, wearing my red dress, and my print top that did not go with it and all my Barb clothes on the garage floor.

After some drunk, anger talk, she allowed me to put my black skirt that does go with the top and then we had a great time in bed, it had been a while.

I was really turned on by seeing her in my clothes. Whats with me? Is she accepting, or just drunk?

Background: We have had a "don’t ask, don’t tell" situation since she blew up 2 years ago after finding my clothes and photos of me dressed as Barb in the garage. She was very angry and was going to leave me. I agreed to go to counseling

The counselor saw my cross-dressing as a form of escape from my life. I find dressing up exhilarating and liberating.

While I have been interested in CD since late teens, it was only 5 years ago that I decided to buy clothes and use a solon for makeup and hair and had photo by a professional photographer. My activities have included going out to dinner a dozen or so times, traveled by plane as Barb 3 times and had ten or so photo sessions.

What’s the deal?
Barb123

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You're not going to find the answer on a web forum, you're going to find it when she sobers up. Just let it ride for a few days and see if she says anything about it.

If the two of you had sex while you were wearing a skirt, I think she is on her way to accepting your dressing.

BTW: Her getting drunk isn't that big a deal in itself unless it's a constant thing. My wife has been drunk before. So have I. I've never had sex with my wife while she was drunk and I was wearing a skirt though. :sad:

Sue, good advice on going slow, her speed anyway. The tropubled child is adopted after having two older by 10 years great kids. I was the leader to adopt. He was 5 at the time and he has been a humbler. So when she gets annoyed with him, I get another load. I have found my dressing up is an escape for me, to be fair, she does not have an escape, no career, no habbies. Thanks for weighin Barb123

Tina your are wise to caution patiences

Barb123