My husband wants to crossdress, and I want to help!
This is my first post, and I'm hoping you wonderful folks can help.
My husband and I have been together for 8 years, married for 2. About three years ago, he and I were having pillow talk and he admitted that one of his fantasies is to wear "fancy clothes," which he told me (after a lot of begging) meant "stockings and stuff." Now, I know that crossdressing is usually not a sexual thing for most men, and I can't say for sure if this is this case with my husband, though he did present it as a sexual fantasy.
I'm asking for help because since mentioning it this once, my husband has been resistant to discussing it further. He's resistant to discuss anything that has to do with sex and sexuality in general, no matter how the subject is presented. I've only mentioned the crossdressing twice since he told me, and both times he said he didn't want to talk about it.
I think this must be something important to him or he wouldn't have mentioned it. He did say he has had this fantasy since he was a young teenager. I don't think he is crossdressing already, since he only mentioned it in the context of sex and is terrible at hiding things from me, but I could be wrong.
My question is, do I purchase some stockings in his size and bring them to bed, despite having never had a conversation with him about living out this fantasy? How do I get him to talk about it? Should I just drop it? I'm new to this and any feedback is appreciated.
Thanks in advance. :)
really embarrased by his desires?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
onemorefirst
This is my first post, and I'm hoping you wonderful folks can help.
My husband and I have been together for 8 years, married for 2. About three years ago, he and I were having pillow talk and he admitted that one of his fantasies is to wear "fancy clothes," which he told me (after a lot of begging) meant "stockings and stuff." Now, I know that crossdressing is usually not a sexual thing for most men, and I can't say for sure if this is this case with my husband, though he did present it as a sexual fantasy.
I'm asking for help because since mentioning it this once, my husband has been resistant to discussing it further. He's resistant to discuss anything that has to do with sex and sexuality in general, no matter how the subject is presented. I've only mentioned the crossdressing twice since he told me, and both times he said he didn't want to talk about it.
I think this must be something important to him or he wouldn't have mentioned it. He did say he has had this fantasy since he was a young teenager. I don't think he is crossdressing already, since he only mentioned it in the context of sex and is terrible at hiding things from me, but I could be wrong.
My question is, do I purchase some stockings in his size and bring them to bed, despite having never had a conversation with him about living out this fantasy? How do I get him to talk about it? Should I just drop it? I'm new to this and any feedback is appreciated.
Thanks in advance. :)
Personally, I would be very cautious at this point. If he is resistant to talking about it when YOU bring it up, he may feel he is being pushed into something if you can't get him to talk. It is usually the other way round if you read enough threads here--the wives don't want to talk about it when their husbands do.
He is very likely really emabrrased about it, he is obviously not comfortable with sex talk as you indicate and THIS kind of sex talk is really the worst for him. 3 years is a long time to bottle up desire. What is his upbringing? Is religion of any importance? Is he social? Guy friends, a loner? Get along with women easily? More description would probably help but I think going out an getting him some panties at this point might not be appropropriate.
Christmas is coming and if you exchange gifts, something like a nice pair of ladies dress slacks or something like St John's Bay ladies cords and a blouse would likely go better than panties which are very intimate. You don't want the clothing to demean in any way. New years eve constume party ? Switch roles, you be superman, he can be Supergirl? IF you socially drink, a few drinks might loosen him up to talk about his desires. Take him shopping for you and have him suggest somehting that would look nice on YOU. He needs to talk first, dress later. IF he can't talk about it now, shopping on line for himself isn't going to be the ticket either. He will have to give a name and that may bother him. Being a CD is something that is NOT accepted generally in society so the stigma attached is going to be great.
Maybe try viewing a movie--Tootsie, or Priscilla queen of the desert, Some like it Hot. It might get the ball rolling.
best wishes to you both in working this out