Hi Sherlyn,
When it feels right for you ,you will walk in and be the prettiest girl in the club.:Power:
Hi Sherlyn,
When it feels right for you ,you will walk in and be the prettiest girl in the club.
Love and Hugs,
Priscilla
Couldn't agree more, Sherlyn.(and w/ all others as well) Consider this another small step in a positive direction. Same thing happened to me, first time out. Actually I didn't make it inside the club till my third try, and didn't stay long till my fourth!!! Also consider possibly a more casual, relaxed, less crowded venue, possibly outdoors. Think I'll start a thread regarding this, take a look.Originally Posted by ~Julie~
Hi Sherlyn ,
I had a similar experience in January
Like yourself I parked the car but hesitated getting out , I wondered if I was at the right place , how embarrasing if I was wrong .
The place looks like a private residence so I waited to see if anyone else went in , an elderly gent exited the residence so I was more suspicious that I was in the wrong place until a young guy went in with a suitcase.
I was going to follow him in but a car pulled up behind me with someone who looked like " Yosimite Sam " , he got out and messed with his car for about 10 minutes before finally walking off down the street .
At this stage my nerves were shot to pieces and I became frozen in my car , I drove away and came back 15 minutes later but I still couldn't move.
The worst part was the feeling that I was no longer Merinda , I was a man in womens clothing sitting in my car many miles from home.
I then drove home and became depressed.
******************
My advice to you Sherlyn is to arange to meet other CDers in male mode , this way you can get to know them before any event and make arangements to go into venues together.
This is what I did and I have successfully attended 3 social events since
[SIZE=3]Merinda[/SIZE]
I am ssssssooooooo excited to be in on your courageous journey!! Thanks for sharing!
The experience you just shared with us is one that reminded me of the a story I wrote around different circumstances, but the same feelings.
Why does not getting into the club mean failure? That is not the finish line of your race...that is your lovely process of running the race to finding out more about yourself, and as others have pointed out here...there are many victories to celebrate in your evening!
I commend your fantasic ability to be present for the process, to ask for help, and...as for one woman's opinion...enjoy the nerves!!!! REALLY !! Cause one day soon you will be old hand at doing this and you will only be able to reflect on the intensity you just went thru cuase your newer self will OWN IT!!
With excitement for YOU! Hugs
Miss Heather
"Stand Up Tall, the View is MUCH Better!"
And the Award for Bravery Under Contradictory Emotions.....goes too......(play the audience...wait ...wait...)...SHERLYN!!!! (Huge applause, close up shots of beautiful women going all limp with relief.....quick shot of Attenborough wiping a tear.)
And the Award for Support and General Good All Round Person goes to..................
...................
...................
..................
(what do you think this is? Big Brother?)
...................
..................
...........
.......
IS!!!!!!!
KEW!!!!!
(Men faint in the street! Fireworks from the Eifell Tower etc etc etc.)
He he he, Thanks Julie, you're a doll!
I have to admit I didn't know how to be supportive but I think I did an okay job of!
I did call the club and made sure TG friendly and all. Then I when we got there I went in to bouncers and asked "any TG ppl here?" They said "yes!" They had Drag show earlier and such. Well, Sherlyn kept looking for TG to come out of bar. We never saw. Though we did see one go in (kinda dressin' on the move too, in downtown). Anyway, we drove and sat and watched and sat. I tried to say all the right things. Anyhow, Sherlyn was a brave trooper!! I think she mentioned getting hit on by that young lil' truck boi (who wasn't bad lookin' either).
~Dear Dorothy,
Hate Oz, took the shoes, find your own way home.
Toto~
You both did great. Good for you. I know it can be a little depressing setting a goal and not achieving it, but you got to the next stage and when it feels right it will be right. No point doing something so scary you dont enjoy it.
As the others have said, you had a whole series of successes. focus on those, driving en femme, out on the steet en femme, being Propositioned en femme!!! sounds successful to me. So, being wise, you saved the best for next time. Doesn't sound chicken, sounds prudent. Can't wait to hear how next time goes. wenda. Red Green also says, "... I am a man...I can change... if I have to."
Sherlyn Dear, you are doing great. Don't think of this as a chicken out, you are just taking small steps and doing a good job. The time will come and you will step through that door like you own the place. You can't go wrong with Kew at your side, she sounds like a great lady and support. Good luck hun you are doing great.
Rikki
WOW !!!!!!! everyone is sooo supportive ,,thank you all again ..this place is such a great haven just to let loose our experiences ,,,funny eh i was afraid too post about this at first i thought it was a downer but i am now seeing it is a real upper ... i guess i was lookin at it thru the negative instead of the positive .. i had just even told Kew that last night,,, now seems like a dream... but!!! Sherlyn was actually downtown out on the street..u grrls have made me think WOW it was a step forward very very cool
Sherlyn... honestly - I'm picky ten times over. I've seen CDs and TGs at bars and stuff (me in drab)... you have SO LITTLE to worry about. You're foxy. Not to mention you got the Kew!
Seriously - you have nothing to worry about.
Sheryln,
I didn't read all the replies so forgive me if I'm being repetitive.
Making that first step out is a lot like jumping into the water for the first time or skiing down a slope for the first time. It's scary but once you do it it's so wonderful! Then you want to do it again and again.
I first went out in the early 90's but I soon went into hibernation as the kids got too old to distract while I dressed. When I came back out I was like a scared rabbit. I met Jacki at Be-All last year and she seemed fearless. She took me to TG friendly bars and it was cool and lots of fun. Then the next day she scheduled a makeover at a hotel in downtown Chicago, far from any TG events related to Be-All. I just said, "What the hell!" and went. I think I was more afraid to say I was chicken to go than I was to actually do it. We got to the hotel and there was a pre-school teachers convention going on. Imagine what was going through my head when I walked through the hotel hallways, dressed, seeing all these teachers! I just looked straight ahead and laughed to Jacki, "Do you think they are taking applications?"
We got to the salon just in time and said we were there for the makeover. Oh, no, we have you for 4 PM not 2 PM. My heart skipped a beat! We had two hours to kill and I was a nervous wreck wondering how we's spend it! So Jacki says let's go to the bar. Mind you it's Saturday afternoon in downtown Chicago in early June and the weather is beautiful. There's lots of people about. Again I suck it up and go, keeping my eyes focused straight ahead. We sat down at the bar but not before we were subjected to lots of strange looks (I was looking out of the corners of my eyes). The bar opened to Michigan Avenue, a very populated street no matter what the weather. We found seats with our backs to the street. After a couple of drinks and no altercations I began to loosen up. Finally 4 PM arrived and we went back to the salon. The makeover was fabulous and so was the girl who did it! But what was most memorable was being out in broad daylight dressed. I'll never forget it.
You can't let apprehension stop you from doing what you want to do. It only makes it worse. So just do it! You have a great lady by your side supporting you and that's more than most have. Appreciate it and have fun.
Now go get that calendar out and plan your next outing!
And Kew, you're remarkable! I love ya kiddo!
Julie Ty for replying ..I read about your outings all the time...I can say this for sure...YOU have got it going ...I only wish I had a small piece of your attitude...Oh like I can go out the door ...drive around etc.. but Saturday night I felt a strange fear I had never felt B4... pretty darn sure it was the thought of ACTUALLY rubbing elbows with others and how i would react ...I meant act....Isnt acting a part of us we have to perfect? Yup I think so......Hugs Julie ...Ty for your support ....TOO COOL !!!!
Like all the others said Sherlyn,
Don't beat yourself up, it is massive step, particularly from the pont of view of those of us who have never made it outside!!
Cherish the support Kew gives you (and her make-up skills) and try again, then we'll hear all about the new girlfriends you both meet inside the club!!
I'll get out this summer too, one way or another!!
Fiona
xx
Girls who are boys, Who like boys to be girls, Who do boys like they're girls, Who do girls like they're boys, Always should be someone you really love
Why is it that some of these threads don't appear on my PCs for a couple of days, then there they are?
Sherlyn, it's very very hard to do things like you attempted, alone. You'll find it much easier if Kew got out of the car and walked with you. Once you get used to going in with her, then you can try it alone, while she waits in the car.
You'll also find it easier if you don't stop to analyze what you are doing or think about what will happen inside. Just get out of the car with Kew and both of you walk straight to the club, no stopping, except for traffic.
Plus, you won't be able to run back to the car if Kew has the keys and is right beside you.
Remember the first time you gathered enough nerve to post your picture here? You can gather it again, especially with Kew there supporting you.
Last edited by DonnaT; 06-21-2005 at 02:22 PM.
DonnaT
Sherlyn... I just made my first solo outing this morning. I got all dressed up and drove 3 miles to a gas station and filled up the SUV. YES, it was sacry, panic attack and everything, but I did it and now when I look back, it was not so bad. See my adventure post. You have a advanage that I don't have. You have a SO to help you. Mine doesn't know about me, so she can not help me.
As been suggested, have your SO walk with you the first two or three times. After that you'll over your fright.
Wow, your first time out to a club and you almost had your first quickie with the guy in the pick-up. lol,,,, You should have flirted with the guy in the truck, then Kew would have gotten jealous and escorted you into the club, Kew would probably have dragged you in.
My advice, go to the club in drab, check out the atmosphere of the place. If you like it while in drab, then you will like it more while dressed.
Amelie
PS- You are a woman now, so expect men to bother you like they do to other women. This is part of being a woman, you'll have to get used to men and their ways.
Hell no you don't!! Give them a f***ing good feminist lecture about how much the better gender female is.
Anyone understand that last sentance? ... no, thought not. Poorly phrased, huh? yeh....
[size=3]Hugs xx[/size]
[size=2]"You don't have to be fat to be a lady", Sophie 2006[/size]
[SIZE=1]"Hey, those are nice shoes, but they'd look better in my pants! ... I mean..." Robot Chicken, 2006[/SIZE]
[size=1]"He's just said a word we don't understand! And he's won at scrabble with it!" - Eddie Izzard 1998[/size]
[SIZE=1]"Head over heels is fine, unless you're in stilettos." -The Beautiful South, 2005[/SIZE]
[size=1]"Forgive me. Let live, me." - Antony and the Johnsons 2005[/size]
[SIZE="1"]"We walk amoung you..." TransAmerica, 2005[/SIZE]
[size=3]THREAD SUCCESSFULLY HIJACKED[/size]
Well I got it
Thank you all soo much again for the encouragement.....can't really say if i will do it the next time ....who knows ,,,but when the oppurtunity arise's you can bet ,,all your words will boost my confidence.. Oh and Amelie lol ... yea a quickie ..i went quickie running back to Kew in the car ...didn't even trip on my heels..getting real good at 4 inch heel walking ...lol
like Sherlyn's eyes,, Tristens legs(and),, all the beautiful "girls" here often "trip My Trigger",, I feel like-an, "admirer" too, though that feels sometimes,smarmy somehow- ???
Just Remember,"Wherever You go- There You are ! "
awwww
Im sure you looked fantastic, you'll be ok next time, with Kew there adoring you and caring for her sis you'll knock em dead!!!!!
Is there someone I can speak to, in customer services, I seem to have the wrong body, no I dont have a reciept, er maybe an upgrade.....hello..???
I expect it's the same with many other girls...I read a thread like this and agree with what all the others have said, so I don't post something sounding too repetitive. So, just so you know, Sherlyn, in addition to the 50 posts, there are hundreds of others who just read, but don't post, who are also very proud of you and rooting for you for next time (and, btw, are inspired by your brave steps as well). We look forward to your next update(s).
Not at all :flirt: Right back at ya babe
honey your more hotter and sexier then girls i know ok. take deep breath look a cross that street smile at the bouncer cause he might think your hot and walk in. and kew if you reading this next time she hesitates at the door light a fire under her heelsto get her to go in and have a good time.
the fallen angel of love, music, and vengence samanthael fell to earth and fell in love with jay and merged with him. she is him and he is her. they love their friends and their sisters.
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