In a Group of our own

[Deborah Jane]

[SIZE="6"]Debs hun I LOVE YOU [/SIZE]

[SIZE="4"]I do not think you weird & I do not think you make our life difficult [/SIZE]

Thank you for your thoughts sweetheart

[SIZE="8"]I love you too Sheila my darling[/SIZE]

[Areyan]

Boy George, Tim Curry as Dr Frankenfurter, David Bowie in his GLAM days, Marilyn Manson, Davey Havok of AFI.... LOTS of women have considered them sex-symbols!

So how do we encourage more of these women and men to be open about their attraction to TG?

Although I wouldn't have really gone for Boy George and Tim Curry was a little scary, all the others... mmmmmm, yummy CDers/TG looking guys... I'd love to see my CDer all dolled up like Manson

Yes, Batty, I think you're right... perhaps GGs and men who can find these type of guys attractive should be more encouraged!



Akira

[Senban]

Tal'Aura said - "Being hatred is price we must pay. Nobody wants us,"

Like I said earlier, some people just take comfort in being the oppressed and downtrodden. They take solace in the fact they are the hated minority because it gives them a sense of self.

The truth remains that no one hates them except themselves. It doesn't have to be that way but it's easier than facing the truth and finding a better way to live life. Been there, done it, seen it for what it is and found a way to move on from it. I suggest you all find a way to do the same.

[Tina B.]

Now I'm depressed, I thought I was loved by my wife, but as she is a GG, I guess that can't be true. I have always felt liked by most people I meet, but I guess that is wrong too, just my optimistic blinders I guess.
Tina

[Sheila]

[SIZE="4"]It's surprising how many persons go through life without ever recognizing that their feelings toward other people are largely determined by their feelings toward themselves, and if you're not comfortable within yourself, you can't be comfortable with others. - Sidney J. Harris [/SIZE]

[SIZE="5"]Maybe a quote applicable to a few in this thread [/SIZE]

[Kelsy]

I am a GG engaged to a wonderful person, who just happens to crossdress.

I have a male whom I adore and am proud to show off, he happens to have a fem side that I adore and am proud to show off when we get the chance (we live 300 miles apart at the moment so we have only had a few times together when that has been able to happen)

, although I am sure that we tog will change as individuals and as a couple along our journey tog, they will come about naturally & I hope bring us even closer together
Debs and I connnected in Dec, we bacame Engaged in January and are marrying in Oct ..... now should she decide in the future that she wishhes to go for SRS I will be beside her every step of the way, I would never dream of attempting to change her in any way
While we marry as MR & Mrs in Oct, we will also have a ceremony on 1st Dec where Debs will be the Bride and I will be her partner (WE have not decided yet whether I will be dressed as a groom or will wear my Oct outfit)

OMG you're a Saint Sheila!! a precious gem! Congads to you and Debs And many years of happiness to you!!


Amy

There is truth in all you said but there are relationships that are absolutey based in unconditional love.

Kelsy

[Vicky_Scot]

What about the GG who accept us for who we are and love us for being us.

My wife loves me for who I am as I love her for who she is.

We do not love this bit or that bit of each other, we love each other as the whole person which embraces all parts of our beings.

Xx Vicky xX

[Lisa Golightly]

I'd love to see my CDer all dolled up like Manson

I call my bad days when I get called sir my Manson days... lol...

[Saika]

I'd love to see my CDer all dolled up like Manson

You're a gem

[Amy Hepker]

Like I said there are many GGs out there do that do accept their CD, TG or other without listening to the Morals of many. As I said We need more GGs like this, more open minded, open hearted GGs out there that will accept us as Humans. We have to be who we are and accept ourselves before other will accept us.

I am having the time of my life being Amy and it shows, but I do have a big empty whole in my life and there is where a Mate would be. My problem is I don't want just any relationship, I could have that already. I want someone who really wants to be with me and who will not leave me because I am who I am. I am around many people and I am always pleasant to be around. I do know someday I will find someone, but until then I am heartbroken.

I guess this why I do think it is good for us all to be who we are on the outside that we are on the inside. The more of us out, the more people will accept us. We have made progress in the last several years with the help of the internet, but there are still so many that will not come out or cannot come out.

[JoannaCaroline]

OK, Im fairly new here, but this repetitive post is getting ridiculous and annoying. joanne Wheeler, this was what I was talking about in your thread about this board being depressing and you're adding to it. This whining about everybody hating us is depressing. The bigger problem is in our own minds and in some of our own self loathing.

How many of you are going to keep whining about the same thing? You are WRONG! Some women, some men, some tgs date, love, like sleep with TG's. Half this board can attest to that and I've dated all three. is it easy? No. Does a majority of the populatin lust after TG's? No. But it's not that hard to find.

Quit associating with closed minded idiots and you may find its not that rare. If all of us can find women or men that like, love, want to marry or dates us, why can't you? At some point you have to ask yourself if maybe the problem is yours and not the worlds!!

I apologize for the rant but this is ridiculous.

[Prissy Linda]

OK, Im fairly new here, but this repetitive post is getting ridiculous and annoying. joanne Wheeler, this was what I was talking about in your thread about this board being depressing and you're adding to it. This whining about everybody hating us is depressing. The bigger problem is in our own minds and in some of our own self loathing.

How many of you are going to keep whining about the same thing? You are WRONG! Some women, some men, some tgs date, love, like sleep with TG's. Half this board can attest to that and I've dated all three. is it easy? No. Does a majority of the populatin lust after TG's? No. But it's not that hard to find.

Quit associating with closed minded idiots and you may find its not that rare. If all of us can find women or men that like, love, want to marry or dates us, why can't you? At some point you have to ask yourself if maybe the problem is yours and not the worlds!!

I apologize for the rant but this is ridiculous.

FINALLY someone put this topic in proper perspective.... Thank you Joanna.

[Areyan]

You're a gem

So are you hun, I love you!

[VeronicaMoonlit]

AMY - you hit the nail on the head - we as a group are liked even less than lepers - nobody likes us - nobody wants us -

I guess I'll have to tell my family (and some other people) that they don't want me or like me. That will go over well.

everyone thinks that we are some type of gay, weird, sick people its the baggage that we have to live with and its awful

Everyone? I don't think so. Some people perhaps, concentrated in certain areas more than others perhaps, but not everyone. Besides, there's nothing wrong with being gay, or weird. I'm not gay, in the traditional sense, might end up as lesbian some day, but not exactly lesbian now. I am weird, in a geeky nerdy way, and that's fine. I'm more likely to get depressed about my own feelings not about how others feel about trans. The majority of people have no opinion either way because they haven't met any of us.

- its what makes our lives so difficult - we HAVE to stick together - we are the only ones who know and appreciate what we go through !

What? Now my family may not understand 100% and I really don't talk to them as much as I should about what I call IT. But they try. It was my sister and mother who bought me Jenny Boylan's "She's Not There." and JJ Allen's "The Man in the Red Velvet Dress" And there's wives/partners/SO's out there who work hard to understand their TG partners. Not to mention all the mental health professionals with a clue (though there are still some without a clue I admit)

And to add to that, don't most ********

I would advise not using that word around the transgender community. Though there are a few who use it as a symbol of pride, Most don't, and consider the use of that word offensive, very offensive.

Don't be so silly... I find it quite sad when a lifestyle choice is placed in the scales with a destructive, debilitating, incurable disease.

According to Wikipedia, it's curable, has been since the 1930's though for about 20 years or so it wasn't curable again due to resistance to the original treatment drug, dapsone The Multi-drug treatments that are used now work very well it says. Leprosy's been eliminated in a couple of countries it was endemic in.

The more open you are with people the more open they are with you... It's not all honey, but it's not all **** either.

Pretty much, I think.

Veronica
Rondelle (Ron) Rogers Jr.

[Nicki B]

Ever hear of the term, "Self-fulfilling prophesy?" All too often, people will get a thought in their head that certain so-call facts will always apply to them... and then complain when those very same things befall them. It's time to start taking responsibility for your own feelings and your own surroundings and stop blaming everything and everyone around you. If you believe that the majority of people you come in contact with will not think you worthy of developing a relationship with, that's exactly what will happen. If you add value to another person's life, being female or male, trans, gay, yellow, tall, overweight or anything else won't make one bit of difference!

What she said....

Being hatred is price we must pay. Nobody wants us,

I'm sorry - but that's just utter rubbish. Is that your experience - or just your imagination? Or is it just what you 'feel' about yourself?

[crusadergirl]

Well, with a positive, upbeat attitude like yours, I find it difficult to imagine why you don't have more friends....

Feel free to mope about in your sackcloth and ashes, punctuated by your dives into the deep pool of self-pity, but don't expect a lot of company.

I agree with Miss Construed on this on. How do you know if ppl hate us. Most just don't know much about this lifestyle.Complaining and crying never gets you anywhere.

[Tal'Aura]

I'm sorry - but that's just utter rubbish. Is that your experience - or just your imagination?

This is my experience. Call it rubbish or whatever you want, but that won't change my reality. It's sad that even on this forum I am being judged sometimes just because I think different. Well, I guess, it's better to stay quiet in here...

Jolan Tru

[Elisa]

I think what everyone here are saying is quite correct, allthough I know some GG's, if presented with the situation the right way would love to have a CD'ing man..

My ex girlfriend, who found out about this after we broke up, said she wished she knew before, because then we could go shopping for womens clothes together.. And that she imagined the best man in a womans world must be a man that knows a lot about womens clothes.

And I think that's a quite correct statement, as I know how much most guys hate going shopping for exactly that.

So whenever I meet my next potential girlfriend, I am going to attempt full openness from the start, and use that as my "crowbar" to her positiveness if you want to call it that.

[PretzelGirl]

This is my experience. Call it rubbish or whatever you want, but that won't change my reality. It's sad that even on this forum I am being judged sometimes just because I think different. Well, I guess, it's better to stay quiet in here...

Jolan Tru

It is never good to be quiet. That would make you susceptible to what other people think and want you to do instead of what you want.

My general rule in life. If I walk tall and look people in the eye, they will either greet me or look away if they are feeling guilty. But if I hang my head or look off to the side, then I am open to however they want to treat me.

Be proud of who you are and let others know it!

[shaun1]

Don't be so silly... I find it quite sad when a lifestyle choice is placed in the scales with a destructive, debilitating, incurable disease. It is morally wrong in my opinion.

There are plenty of people that liked 'Lisa' before I admitted to being TS and became Lisa. The more open you are with people the more open they are with you... It's not all honey, but it's not all **** either.

lisa luv i think your great your out look on life is so positive its uplifting.no matter whats the problem you always look for the good.now everybody take note all you people out there with your woo is me outlook should surrond yourself with people like lisa(at least have one person like her) because when you get all sollom she can give you the good side of things aswell as a much needed slap.live your lifes to its full make the most of everything cause we only get one shot at this and stop moaning.the more you enjoy life the more fun it is the more fun it is the happier you become.


THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE , THE PRETTY THINGS COST A FORTUNE

Thank goodness I have Debs who does not hold with that attitude .............

[SIZE="6"]Debs hun I LOVE YOU [/SIZE]

[SIZE="4"]I do not think you weird & I do not think you make our life difficult [/SIZE]

i was starting to lose faith in this site with all the negativity but when i see comments like yours they make me smile and relise there are happy cheerful people here no matter what there gender is.thank you for restoring my faith in this site.i hope you and debs both have the weddings you deserve and have a long and happy life together.


THE BEST THINGS I LIFE ARE FREE , THE PRETTY THINGS COST A FORTUNE

[Super Amanda]

I can't wait to get back into the swing of things! I'm almost divorced and coming out has been great! I'm gonna be upfront with any women I meet, and I'm very optimistic! I think the future is bright for me! Bright and pink!

[Tal'Aura]

But when AnnieMay starts saying "everybody hates us", I cry foul. She knows nothing about the personal lives of most of us, so she's speading gloom and despondency on the basis of her ignorance. (In wartime this is a criminal offence within the category of assisting the enemy.)

I see... And what are you going to do about it? Would you arrest AnnieMay and take her to court martial?

Be advised that she is probably not referring to every crossdresser on this planet. For example, perhaps she talks about situation in place where she lives... There is a lot of variables we don't know and things aren't always just black and white, so stop labelling someone as a negative person if you don't know the whole story.

Okay, now I'm out of this discussion.

Jolan Tru

[Carin]

We are all unique. We can club together as engineers, hairdressers, fiction writers, homosexual, heterosexual, Latino, Caucasian, transgendered, whatever club you like.

But we are each individuals. All heterosexual men don't just fall in love with all heterosexual women. We seek out the uniqueness in people. You can limit your search for relationships to one club, and say that no-one likes you. You can believe that you only fit in one club, and miss the uniqueness of people all around you.

One can not stay in the closet and still exclaim that no-one likes you, or generalize that no-one likes us. I have more friends now, male and female, straight and otherwise, than I did before.

The implication is that one is a perfectly wonderful adorable person that anyone would want - except that you are a crossdresser. The implication is that your uniqueness is that you are a crossdresser. If that is all there is to you, well good luck.

we as a group are liked even less than lepers - nobody likes us - nobody wants us

I am personally offended by the remark. Such misinformation from someone with so much to say is a dis-service at best. We are not a gang walking around looking to make trouble. We are a community in a world of overlapping communities. We pose a challenge to conformal thought and so be it. I think your SO of 38 years would disagree with your exclusive statement.

We are not in a group of our own when it comes to relationships. We are in a world with boundless possibilities. You have to work for those possibilities. Even the best looking super-model has to work to find the right relationship. Gender variant is not an exclusive group. If you look through stereoptypical glasses, you will only see what you expect to see.

[kellycan27]

But we are each individuals. All heterosexual men don't just fall in love with all heterosexual women. We seek out the uniqueness in people. You can limit your search for relationships to one club, and say that no-one likes you. You can believe that you only fit in one club, and miss the uniqueness of people all around you.


I am a TS
I just did a thread about a wonderful heterosexual man that recently came back into my life with a desire to enter into a relationship with me. It took him a while to come to terms... but he did and what he said was this. I love you for what you are on the inside,not for that which you are on the outside.

[Nicki B]

This is my experience. Call it rubbish or whatever you want, but that won't change my reality. It's sad that even on this forum I am being judged sometimes just because I think different. Well, I guess, it's better to stay quiet in here...

Jolan - I wasn't trying to rubbish your experience - I'm sorry if you took it that way.

What I was trying to point out was that you expanded your experience to encompass all the rest of us - and if you spend only a little time reading threads here, you'll see it simply isn't the case for everybody, as you said?

Perhaps you should consider travelling and experiencing other places to try and find somewhere where you are not automatically 'hated' - such hatred usually goes together with a poverty of education, IME?