Crossdressing as a choice

[Jonelle]

I think that it is my choice to crossdress!!; however, I think I would still do it if I didn't want to anymore!

[BLUE ORCHID]

It's who I am it's what I do I am just the vehicle CDing engine that drives me.
Going down lifes highways on cruise control.
maybe some day I will be in control but for now I am just going
along for the ride 80/20 % drab/femme
.
.................................................. ..............thanks..........ORCHID

[Jenniferpl]

I kind of treat it as a hobby that I have to do. I have learned to just put on a bra in the morning , even when I do not want to, and go about my day. It frees up my mind to do other things and prevents me consently thinking about it.

Life is all about choices we make. Cross dressing is not the only thing in my life. I have other interest also. I have only so many dollars to spend and I try to spend those dollars wisely.

[Greymancd]

The whole deserted Island thing gets to me I think I would just make a grass skirt. It would be much easier than making grass pants!

[battybattybats]

There are plenty of animals that change sex (eg many fish) or change themselves to look like the other sex (eg the Giant Cuttlefish) or which have behaviours normally belonging to one sex (female birds singing male birds songs).

There are examples of CDs who discover relatives are CDs such as the recently departed Motor Journalist Legend Peter Wherret who discovered his father was also a CD.

The evolutionary advantages of homosexuality and of non-reproducing siblings is called Kin Selection (found in ants) and studies have been done involving the crossdressing '3rd sex' of the people of Samoa showing that they provide an advantage in the success in life of their siblings, that the crossdressing accepted in Samoa results in kin-selection.

A gene associated with TS has been found, biological brain differences in TSs and Gays and Lesbians have all been found. I would be shocked if such is not found for CDs when they get around to FMRI scans and brain dissections of us. Chances are bieng a CD is merely to have a mild case of TS just as you can be born with Severe or Mild Autism.

Approximately 1 in 60 people are biologically Intersex to some degree anyway though most don't know it.

I am conviced that the drive for our CDing is neuroanatomical, related to the Gender Dysphoria that TSs go through and that pink fog is related to the dysphoria crises that many TSs go through and the resultant positive feellings when they get treatment and transition. I expect when finally neuro-science moves onto us Pink Fog will be re-termed something like Gender Dysphoric Repression Cessation Euphoria or the like.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

For me, it's not a choice. It's too much a part of who i am.

[JoannaCaroline]

I still like the argument that I hear from a lot of gay people when talking to a straight person about choosing to sin and be gay;

So when did you choose to be straight?

If the church told you it was wrong to be straight and right to be gay, could you decide that you wanted to date men (questin for men)?

I think the same applies here.

[cindybarnes]

Even tho I can choose what to wear when Im home I didnt choose to have this other side ingrained inside me.
Nobody dressed me up as a kid, there was no reason for me to have these thoughts when I was four or five years old. So where did it come from ? If it was just a weird thought it would have come and gone.
Figuring this out was a big part of accepting who I am and is why I dont wonder or worry about it anymore

Cindy

[Carly D.]

I try to think of an answer if someone I know were to catch me.. the answer to "why are you dressed this way?" and I can't answer them.. I can't think of an answer that would just put into their minds "oh, I see, I get it".. I wish I had an answer that would hit them so hard that they would say that.. but I can't think of anything that deep.. that clever.. so mind numbingly briliant.. except to say "42" and hope they are into Douglas Adams as much as me..

[docrobbysherry]

I only started dressing about 11+ years ago, after age 50. So, I often think my CDing is a "phase" I'll eventually pass thru. Altho, I've NEVER had an activity that was SO OVERWHELMINGLY COMPULSIVE! I'm now COMPLETELY obsessed with dressing!

After all, as a kid, I collected nearly every kind of animal on the planet, and built model airplanes, boats, cars, from scratch! Now, I've no desire for pets, or to build things! ( Except fem connected items, like masks!) I used to play in bands and orchestras. I was good! But, don't desire to play any more.

As a young man, I became interested in various sexual fetishes. Bondage became my favorite! Now, I rarely think about anything except DRESSING! And, yes Marla! It's very sexual in nature for me, too!

These other things were ALL VERY IMPORTANT in my life! But not any more!
So, one day, I expect to become increasingly disinterested in CDing. As I have the other things in the past.

The question for ME is;
Will I be HAPPIER without the desire to dress, or NOT?

Oh well! I'll STILL have half a million pics to play with, if I EVER give up dressing!

[juneW]

For me, it's a want, a desire, but not a compulsion. And definitely not a "need". However, I also "want" to listen to music; I "want" to have a fun with my friends; I "want" to watch interesting movies, eat tasty food, and read great books.
As human beings, we're more than just our biological necessities; and CDing is just as important in my life as any other hobby that satisfies or pleases me. If I absolutely had to, I could give it up, but I certainly don't think I will anytime soon.

[marla01]

A few comments...

- Who I am is somewhat under my control, but biology and society have probably had a much greater effect, so one might say I have little choice of who I am.

- What I do with who I am is totally my choice.

- I choose to be me, and live the life I do because it makes me a better person. Being transgendered gives me way more than any minor cost I have to face.

Marla

[Melanie R]

Being a crossdresser I believe is biological. Whether you express your inner femininity through wearing feminine clothing is a choice. I am Melanie no matter what I am wearing.

[Joy Carter]

If it wasn't such a stigma, I'd dress this way twenty four seven. That being said, I really belive in the female brain in the male body theory. My body just over developed for my brain.

[Ruth]

I suppressed my CDing for a long time because I believed it was a vice: I wasn't sure about whether it was a need or a choice, but I thought it was wrong anyway.
Eventually my attitude changed and I began to see it as basically an aspect of my personality: I'm still not totally clear about whether it's a need or a choice, but I enjoy it without guilt now.
And I recognise my feminine side more clearly, and I'm aware of it when I'm not dressed, so I am beginning to separate the parts out, so my actual CDing is a choice, but my transgender nature is simply a fact of life, about which I had or have no choice.

[marla01]

That being said, I really belive in the female brain in the male body theory.

Perhaps this would be worth a separate thread, but some questions occured to me.

If I may ask, what does having a 'female brain' (whatever that is) have to do with crossdressing (or even SRS)? Do our brains 'sex' dictate our clothing? If so, how? Also, why is our modern clothing so different from 50 years ago, or the clothing of New Guinea tribes persons, or the Roman Empire, ancient Babylonia (etc, etc, etc)? Is this huge variety of clothing as we move through time and cultures dictated by changing brains? Or do cultures effect our physical brains?

What is the cause and effect?

And what exactly is a 'female brain'? What are the criteria and characteristics? I assume there are some huge and very measurable differences between female and male brains if they effect our clothing choices (and social representations), so what are they and what is the best means of measuring it?

Just some interesting questions for discussion.

Marla

[msginaadoll]

I think a lot depends on how you define the term crossdressing. Is it simply "To dress in the clothing characteristic of the opposite sex" as defined in my dictionary. If so theyn it is a choice- I chose to put on the clothes I am not forced to dress. By the definition the times I did not wear those said clothes I was not a crossdresser. I think it goes deeper then. For me at least it is part of who I am. I rember at 8 or 9 wanting to wear my neighbors clothes, maybe even further back. I was not certainly something I chose to desire. No idea where it came from. I do believe I can chose to stop dressing, at least for extended periods( I certainly have) However i will still have the urge, desire, feel the loss of not doing so. Just my two cents.

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

I could choose to stop crossdressing any time I like. The problem is I would NOT like to stop. I love being a crossdresser. This aspect of who I am has brought much happiness in to my life. I would not choose to stop cding any more than I would choose to stop eating food.

I could choose to stop eating food any time I like. Seriously - I can stop whenever I want to... of course, I don't want to. If I ever did choose stop eating food, I'm sure it would land me in a psychiatric hospital. I bet the same would happen if I chose to stop cding.

Did that answer the question?

[AshleyCDFL]

I try to think of an answer if someone I know were to catch me.. the answer to "why are you dressed this way?" and I can't answer them.. I can't think of an answer that would just put into their minds "oh, I see, I get it".. I wish I had an answer that would hit them so hard that they would say that.. but I can't think of anything that deep.. that clever.. so mind numbingly briliant.. except to say "42" and hope they are into Douglas Adams as much as me..

Love the Hitchhiker reference! I love the movie and just got the book, haven't had time to read it just yet....