I don't fault anyone for using an avatar that's not them. It takes a lot of courage to post a real picture of yourself on the Internet for all the world to see. The reality, of course, is that there's a snowball's chance in hell that anyone you know will ever find that picture and realize it's you, but that's another story.
Hi Julie (and ladies),
How is everyone? It's been a long time since I've actively posted here and thought this was a good point to jump in. I've spotlighted a section of a part of Julie's opening post because I concur with this mindset 100%.
I know there are many reasons why some of us dress and go out, while others dress and stay in. I do not fault ANYONE for how they choose to make their decisions associated with crossdressing. Lord knows it's a major challenge that comes along with great fears that are related to work, family, friends, and especially, spouses and significant others. Those who have supportive spouses will never really realize how fortunate you are. Those of us who have to "dress on the sly", which is my case, have many hurdles and obstacles to overcome before being able to step out on the town.
With that being said, I enjoy dressing and looking as girly as possible, so when I get all dolled-up, the last thing I want to do is sit at a PC or in a hotel room somewhere. By God, I'm going OUT! First of all, I know what I look like in drab (and it ain't pretty). When I'm completely en femme with full make-up, hair, and dress, I look a-b-s-o-l-u-t-e-l-y NOTHING like I do when in Sir Maleness. I have all the confidence in the world that nobody will "out" me.
In fact, I have three different oriental ladies that help me with my wigs, tailoring and alterations, and hair and make-up. None of these ladies know each other and they all agree individually that there isn't any way for them to pick me out on the street if I were to walk by them (because I've definitely asked them). I also have a couple of gf's that I know while in drab also, and they tell me they would never recognize me either. My voice is another story, and I'm sure it would be a dead give-away, but I'm not talking about voice recognition right now, I'm talking about sheer physical appearance only.
The point I'm trying to make here is if you don't feel confident going out, what's it going to take to build that confidence? Those of you who sit dressed behind your PC or in a hotel room...is that your goal? Is that as much as you are trying to accomplish, or is it a stepping-stone to better and bolder things? I don't mean to start an off-topic discussion in this thread, but I just don't get it. I make getting out a celebration of the greatest magnitude because I can't do it very often. If I can't go out, I won't dress. I'm still Madilyn inside and on-line, and I will always be Maddy on-line, but because of the covertness of my dressing opportunities, I refuse to put myself through that grief just to sit behind the PC. The physical Maddy has to be tucked-away securely until the next time she can come out and play.
My second point with respect to recognition is this. If I go out on the town and hang-out at "acceptable" CD establishments, there's a comfort zone there. I am accepted and embraced. Once you step out of that comfort zone, then the reality of being recognized is magnified. The way I figure it, if I'm in a CD comfort zone and I run into somebody who knows me and they recognize me, then they have something on me, but I can guarantee you that I would have something on them also. What I'm saying is, I don't have friends or business acquaintances in normal day-to-day life who would frequent CD friendly establishments. If they do and I see them, then we obviously have more in common than either of us knew.
Some of you may have read my post about my little Mini-MaddyFest this week. This is my new avatar and my NEW LOOK for this year. I'm not happy with any of the pictures (because I looked so much hotter in the flesh), so I may play around with my avatar a bit, but I threw this up just to give you a quick peek. I'll eventually get everything posted in my Yahoo Profile Photo Album. Thanks to those of you who replied to my post. I had a great time. I am always a little meloncholy after I put Maddy away for the "season". I know it will be a long time before I see her physically materialize again, so it's somewhat of a withdrawal process for me. I just have to make the most of it whenever I can. As the Latin saying goes "carpe diem" or "seize the day" ladies...
Kisses,
Maddy
p.s. I hope to stick around here a bit more, but I can't make any promises...always know that I'm here in spirit and not too far away. I read the posts quite often without posting myself. It's hard for me to post when I can't live it daily. I hope you understand.