Tramp?

[Lorileah]

Sorry, Lorileah. . . if you dress like a ho, you gonna be treated like a ho. I came out the other day wearing skin-tight stretchy black pants and a midriff-baring slinky top. My husband said, "You look cheap. Go put on some real clothes." I'm not saying that men have a right to treat women demeaningly. But people do judge you by your clothes. If a guy is looking for a quick something, he's going to focus on the women who look cheap. That's just common sense, dating 101.

I'll start with it is faulty logic. By association, if you dress like a school marm you are a teacher. Or if you dress like a princess you will be treated like one. Hey if you dress like a woman you will be treated like a woman! YAY! Oh wait, I just proved my own point. Men see what they want to see.

This reinforced my post in that thread that men can be and are pigs. As I explained in that thread the "men" who treated me like a "ho" never even SAW what I looked like. No pictures, no real life meeting. So it wasn't the dress. It was the male attitude that anything vaguely feminine is there for their pleasure. Thats my story and I am sticking to it.

But why then do men think they can control how their spouse dresses? Seamus' husband was telling Seamus how to act and dress. Seems to me Seamus probably was wearing something similar when he first met her. Was she (sorry Seamus but since the outfit seemed feminine I'll say she) a
"ho" when they first went out? I have this image of a guy slumped in a worn out chair with a beer in his hand, washed out ugly boxers and a "wife beater" t-shirt saying his wife should not dress like she was. I am just as bad as most guys jumping to this conclusion aren't I?

The GG's will probably agree with me in the most part here. Should women be wearing Burqa's because men are so uncontrollable they cannot fight the urge to mate with anything in a skirt? No wonder women dress "down". If they get accused of being tramps, and sl*ts and "ho's" all the time, I would want to look bad just to keep the creeps away.

So call me what you will. I like minis and heels. I don't "date" just anyone. I like how I look and I like how many GG's look in a short or above the knee skirt. I don't ever make the assumption that any person is of loose moral character just because they wear something.

Besides, have any of you "men" (used loosely because men is part of gentlemen...and if you think someone is a skirt is just your sex toy, you are NO gentleman) have seen real "ho's" they don't dress anything like CD's

[tricia_uktv]

But sometimes its lovely to dress like a tramp Provided of course you know what to expect.

[cindym5_04]

I've seen real ho's. Just go to the right spots in DC and you can find plenty on the street.

I generally try not to judge people by the way they are dressed, honestly. When I dress in my girl stuff, I do like short skirts and dresses and things along the more "sexy" side and also dressing nicely (nice unwrinkled clothes, etc). My guy side, however, I'm much more into jeans and tshirts and not always concerned if stuff is wrinkled or not. I also like things a bit baggy as a guy, more fitted as a girl.

Knowing this, I honestly try to not pass judgment if a girl is "easy" or not. Granted I'm married, so I don't really care if a girl is or not, but even in the past I haven't. I don't think clothes are what makes the person really. It's how the person acts and treats others that is what makes them.

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Wow, this is kind of a tough one in a way. I have so had my wife treat me like a teenage girl sometimes, as in, "You're not really going out dressed like that are you?" And I kind of look shamefaced and pull down my skirt or even go back in the bedroom and change completely.

But if I were an adult g-girl and my husband, or any male, said that to me, I would flip them off and say, "You, betcher sweetass I am!"<lol> After all, trampiness is in the eye of the beerholder.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[Rebecca Jackson]

As the saying goes, you can't always judge a book by it's cover.

Short skirts and high heels are soooo much fun!!! Sometimes you just have to be a little trampy!

[Seamus_Jameson]

Yikes! My daddy told me never argue clothes with a woman. Guess I should've listened.

Oh wait, I just proved my own point. Men see what they want to see.

Sorry.

This reinforced my post in that thread that men can be and are pigs. As I explained in that thread the "men" who treated me like a "ho" never even SAW what I looked like. No pictures, no real life meeting. So it wasn't the dress. It was the male attitude that anything vaguely feminine is there for their pleasure. Thats my story and I am sticking to it.

An entitlement attitude is unattractive in either gender. Some guys will just be jerks. Find yourself a better guy. I guess I'm more thinking of the teenage girls you see at the mall, etc. Ladies, if I can see your underwear, it's too short! Unless you like the aforementioned jerks slobbering over your hindquarters.

But why then do men think they can control how their spouse dresses? Seamus' husband was telling Seamus how to act and dress. Seems to me Seamus probably was wearing something similar when he first met her.

I think women today are a bit too heavy into the "don't you dare tell me how to act" thing. They miss some real gems that way. For instance, if a guy cares about how you look, he still finds you attractive and feels possessive about you. If she refuses to let her husband have any control over her wardrobe, he give up. Wife: "How do I look, dear?" Husband: [barely glancing up from the television] "Fine. See you when you get home." Who'd want that?

Was she (sorry Seamus but since the outfit seemed feminine I'll say she) a "ho" when they first went out?

Nope. I was "experimenting" (testing to see if he still cared).

If they get accused of being tramps, and sl*ts and "ho's" all the time, I would want to look bad just to keep the creeps away.

Welcome to the world of women. It happens. *shrug*

So call me what you will.

A spirited woman who speaks her mind? It's your call and you've gotta dress in what makes you comfortable.

Besides, have any of you "men" (used loosely because men is part of gentlemen...and if you think someone is a skirt is just your sex toy, you are NO gentleman) have seen real "ho's" they don't dress anything like CD's

Yep. They do business twenty feet from my front door every night, one to four in the morning. It's a hard life and they deserve every shred of dignity they can get, IMHO.

[Marissa Mae]

No doubt wearing trampy clothes is fun, hot, sexy, exhilarating, but seriously, you can't argue with the fact that when women are wearing a too short skirt, barely-there top, and 5 inch heels to hike their ass into the air, it isn't for comfort! There is a line between "attention *****" and acceptable, and to chide men for acting on biological impulses is kind of naive. When I see a fine looking Asian woman (my Achilles heel), I do a double take, and despite how much mental strength I have, can't help but want to talk to her, get to know her etc. If I see a fine Asian woman dressed to reveal her body in saucy clothes, part of me says "yeah, you and every other guy", but at the same time I want to get in her pants and then get to know her. Done and done, nothing I can do about it.

In a perfect world, yeah, us men shouldn't expect a girl dressed for attention would want to have raunchy sex, and at the same time I should be able to dress as Marissa in public without anyone giving me a second thought too! I see where you are coming from, and I wish it was that way, but alas, we can't argue with biological sub-routines.

[TSchapes]

You can't say, "I have the right to express myself through clothing", then turn around and say, "just because I dress like a tart, I'm not"!

You are expressing yourself through vestiges. You are expressing your feminine side through women's clothing. You express yourself that you are a power player by wearing a "power suit". You are expressing your "sexy side" by wearing a short skirt.

John T. Molloy didn't get rich because "Dressing for Success" was just so off base. "What not to Wear" would have been canceled in the first season if they didn't have a point that you will be treated accordingly by the way you dress.

They've proven this with real live tests where the person wears terrible clothing and asks for directions and won't get the time of day. They clean them up and have them wear appropriate clothing and they will get people to help them every time.

People do judge a book by the cover, they are visual. Seeing is the first thing that they can use to size up a person when they first encounter them. You can either help them along in their first impression, or fight against yourself by what you are wearing.

-Tracy

[Lorileah]

Marrissa, yes I can chide a man for acting on impulses. That's why we think we are better than dogs. Having an impulse and acting on it are two different things.

Tracy, you know I love ya but it isn't two ways. Just because society thinks that short skirts are trampy does not make it so. Unless many of the young women I see daily from the high school and college near here are all ...OMG is that how they make money?!?

I scream into the wind often but we need to change these outdated neanderthal ways of thinking. It comes blatantly obvious that many people who post on these boards are no different than the spouses they complain about. "My wife won't accept me for what I am...but by gawd she better NOT wear that in public!"

Guys want females to dress nice but then they put them in the "ho" category

Guess the old saying is true. Men want a lady in the parlor, a gourmet in the kitchen and a wh*re in the bedroom.

[Melissa A.]

There is a line between "attention *****" and acceptable, and to chide men for acting on biological impulses is kind of naive.

This is the same kind of thought process that used to put rape victims on trial(figuratively). The same kind of thinking that still blames the victim. I don't care if it's rape or verbal harrassment, Almost all men are capable of controling their mouths and their penis. Those who can't don't deserve excuses. Sometimes a woman just wants to look sexy. To please herself. And yeah, sometimes she wants to look sexy to attract others. So What??? That doesn't mean she wants to be catcalled at or raped.

Perhaps there is a common sense line. And at my age, I rarely do what is less than comfortable. But every woman has a right to wear whatever makes her happy, and to be left alone regardless of what she has on. Biological impulses dont turn otherwise rational people crazy. THAT is naiive, if anything is.

Hugs,

Melissa

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

So call me what you will. I like minis and heels. I don't "date" just anyone. I like how I look and I like how many GG's look in a short or above the knee skirt. I don't ever make the assumption that any person is of loose moral character just because they wear something.

Excellent point, Lorileah. I recently ranted about the whole sexy = ****ty garbage recently on my blog.

I love women in short skirts, nice legs, showing lots of skin, too. That is also how I prefer to dress myself. I dress how I like to see myself, NOT to get called a tramp or sIut. I most certainly am not a tramp, nor do I see women who flash a lot of skin as such... unless they are acting like one. Acting like a tramp has little to do with how one dresses anyway.

I'm SOOOOOOOO tired of the "dress you age" and "too much skin showing is ****ty" garbage. That's right up there with "if a man wears a dress, he's a perv." It's ALL BS and I'll dress how I want to... barring places where my personal safety is at risk for drawing attention to myself (in danger for being a cd, not for being dressed too sexy).

Dressing down feels like such a waste of dressing in the first place to me. When I like how I look, I feel great about myself. Dressing conservatively feels almost like dressing in drab... only with makeup. Soooooo NOT me. Blah.

Nothing against anyone who enjoys a more conservative feminine look. It's just not for me. Different strokes.

[shesadvl]

is this a bit like that song.... "the ladie & the tramp" laffing... kidding

as for the other saying,.... Lorileah ...men have always wanted an angel on the left and a devil on the right. reminds me of uncle crackers song... memphis soul song.

As i see so much on here in comments or quotes attached to the different members... "clothes does not maketh the man"... but surely does maketh the womam.
Those that dress for a particular reason being the ladies of the night or as they are now named here "sex workers", or those working in the sex industry , who also have their own rights, and protection, no matter how explicit they dress, they dont deserve the way some of them are treated, most guys do say they dress like that they deserve what happens., so there in I think there is no equality in "some males" thinking that its alright to rape or abuse. I admire those of you that have put in here how you are within your male control of yourselves....But not every male is the same no matter you all think alike.....laffing... yes ya do...

Where as sense and senseability rein...if you dress tardy then you are treated as such swings both ways male/female, if you dress to the nines then you are treated in a different as upper class male/female,
once again its society's labels on how one is when they dress, male or female.

The word "ho" is a term that has come in the realm of the younger people of today to be a describing word of either gender I suspect male or female, as I have noticed they all use it. (perhaps thats where this terminology came from was within the "rap" music.the same as the word biatch/bitch.)

Always in both sexes if they are dressed, so that catches an eye male or female or a wolf whistle means hey I do look good.... laffing... but how many gurls wolf whistle at men???
I know I have laffing...but then im a baddie it makes the guyz turn round and look n you grin n say yup there goes a good lookn bloke....

So in all if you dress to impress all the power to you,... if you dress to look trampy ,...what are you really doing...and if you dress for comfort n bugger what you look like way to go... gotta be comfortable some where sometime.....

Me im always told ....Why are you all dressed up... I dress the same way all the time..but you look very posh...n i say nah.... but wear slacks or trousers,mostly ....with varying...different tops.....
I stopped wearing skirts n mini skirts when i caused an accident...
with me long legs.... laffing wont say no more....because then this will become a TMI...post...laffing....

[Samantha43]

My 2 cents worth:

I used to love it when my wife would wear a mini and heels when we were younger. I liked to show her off. Now would I want her to go to a bar dressed like that without me? Heck no! I know how (and what) men think. A woman in sexy clothes is sending signals to the men all around her. Whether she wants to or not. There are many forms of communication. The way one chooses to dress is one of them. When I was younger and was wanting to "get lucky", did I go after the women who looked respectible? No, I went after the ones in tight tops, mini skirts and high heels. They were always more willing. I truly believe they dressed that way for a reason.

Now, when I dress I do everything from a leather mini, a leather corset and sky high heels to a conservative business suit to a casual pair of jeans, a sweater and boots. I like them all. It just depends on what mood I'm in.

I ain't leaving the house in the leather mini and corset though.....too many perverts out there.....

[Marissa Mae]

This is the same kind of thought process that used to put rape victims on trial(figuratively). The same kind of thinking that still blames the victim. I don't care if it's rape or verbal harrassment, Almost all men are capable of controling their mouths and their penis. Those who can't don't deserve excuses. Sometimes a woman just wants to look sexy. To please herself. And yeah, sometimes she wants to look sexy to attract others. So What??? That doesn't mean she wants to be catcalled at or raped.

Perhaps there is a common sense line. And at my age, I rarely do what is less than comfortable. But every woman has a right to wear whatever makes her happy, and to be left alone regardless of what she has on. Biological impulses dont turn otherwise rational people crazy. THAT is naiive, if anything is.

Hugs,

Melissa

Not everyone is rational and in control of their impulses. Biological impulses cause males to be "turned on" by certain features of women... eyes, hair, breasts, legs, butt. Knowing this, and dressing in an openly revealing, skimpy manner, is inviting trouble.

I know what you mean when you mention that this sort of thinking "puts the victim on trial", and it's such a gray area determining what is "too short" or "too revealing". At work, women wear some very flattering business professional outfits which may not be revealing, but make them very attractive none-the-less. It all depends on the situation I guess.

[Teri Jean]

Lori, I love my mini skirts and tight tops so if that is inappropriate for some then instead of getting them a beer, throw it at them. Preferrably unopened so you don't spill.LOL Girl you are a very striking gal and if you like shot skirts and dresses with heels, go for it. I do and there is the rub, we can and should be true to ourselves. Ranting over.

Huggs and kisses, Keli

[Dressing Jill]

I hate the statement men are pigs. I am a man and I am not a pig. I am very open to new ideas. The women who come over wish their houses where as clean as mine. I do not treat people badly or animals either.

So when some one says that men are pigs around me I give them the lecture. I know that some men are real slops and live in a cave and haven't cleaned there houses in forever. However I am not one of them. And besides that pigs are pretty smart animals and to insult them with the images of slop-a-mens is not fair to them.

[Melissa A.]

hey.....I said most men manage to control themselves. And there are alotta men who are far neater than me

Hugs,

Melissa

[Lorileah]

to sum what I hear so far.

Guys can't control themselves when they see a skirt and nice pair of legs no matter what is up under the skirt. It is the way they are made.

When you are on the prowl you want your (future) wife to look sexy and when you see her in a short skirt and heels you know she is going to lay you but after that she becomes exclusive property with an iron fence and guard dogs around her and by gawd she better look like a mud fence. However if you are on the prowl and see a woman in a conservative outfit you ignore her because she won't "put out".

Once you put on a short skirt and heels you pretty much want to have sex and you cannot control this desire because you are of easy virtue. It comes with the skirt. Read the tag Wash cold water dry permanent press, make sure you are ready for someone to jump your bones

"most" guys are pigs.

Am I close?

[VeronicaMoonlit]

.............<snippage>
"most" guys are pigs.

Am I close?

Pretty much, though I feel it's because they weren't taught how not to be, In other words, I think it's learned.

As for me, I'm 42 years old and rather classic in a frumpy sort of way. You'd never catch me in a miniskirt AND fishnets AND stilettos (though you'd have to define stiletto). Change that miniskirt to a classic knee length pencil skirt, and the fishnets to be the fine guage micro-fishnets, and the stilettos be say a pretty heeled mary jane....I'd wear that, depending on where I was going. And I have worn micro-fishnets with a tweed jacket and skirt while shopping at Oak Brook Center up north.

Veronica
Rondelle (Ron) Rogers Jr.

[TSchapes]

to sum what I hear so far.

Guys can't control themselves when they see a skirt and nice pair of legs no matter what is up under the skirt. It is the way they are made.

I was never that way, but then somehow they tell me I'm "different". But yes, my observation of my peers, is this is true.

When you are on the prowl you want your (future) wife to look sexy and when you see her in a short skirt and heels you know she is going to lay you but after that she becomes exclusive property with an iron fence and guard dogs around her and by gawd she better look like a mud fence. However if you are on the prowl and see a woman in a conservative outfit you ignore her because she won't "put out".

I've never wanted my wife to look overtly sexy in public, in the bedroom fine. There's a way to look sexy and put together and not "trampy" (your word).

Once you put on a short skirt and heels you pretty much want to have sex and you cannot control this desire because you are of easy virtue. It comes with the skirt. Read the tag Wash cold water dry permanent press, make sure you are ready for someone to jump your bones

OK, I've never assumed that if a gal is wearing overtly sexy clothes that I can do anything with her without her permission. Maybe that's just the way my mom raised me, or again because I'm "different".

"most" guys are pigs.

I don't think so, there's a minority of zhlobs out there (pardon my Yiddish) that are so obnoxious, that they overshadow the quiet, reserved, polished gentlemen that are out there. Squeaky wheel and all that...

Am I close?

You're batting maybe 260, which in baseball is not that bad!

Love, Tracy

[Samantha43]

to sum what I hear so far.

Guys can't control themselves when they see a skirt and nice pair of legs no matter what is up under the skirt. It is the way they are made.

You have to remember how men are sexually stimulated. We are visually stimulated. What is sexier? A woman in a dumpy sweat suit with no makeup and her hair up, or a woman in a mini, tight top and heels? I know which one stimulates me more. Oh, it does matter what is up under the skirt.......

When you are on the prowl you want your (future) wife to look sexy and when you see her in a short skirt and heels you know she is going to lay you but after that she becomes exclusive property with an iron fence and guard dogs around her and by gawd she better look like a mud fence. However if you are on the prowl and see a woman in a conservative outfit you ignore her because she won't "put out".

My wife was wearing a conservative outfit when I met her. At that point I was done with the shallow women in sexy outfits and was looking for a good girl to spend my life with. She did dress sexy after we married (but not too sexy) because she knew I liked that. She would have never gone out alone dressed like that. Maybe I corrupted her....

My wife, my property? Yeah, right....... She's about as independent minded as anyone I know. That's why I love her.

I don't need an iron fence and guard dogs. I trust her. I still perfer that she looks sexy. I don't think she could ever look like a mud fence.

Once you put on a short skirt and heels you pretty much want to have sex and you cannot control this desire because you are of easy virtue. It comes with the skirt. Read the tag Wash cold water dry permanent press, make sure you are ready for someone to jump your bones

Yeah, pretty much. If you are in a bar with a short skirt and stilletos, you are communicating to every man in there that you are available for a good time even if that isn't really the message you want to convey. I've been to a bar or two in my life. That's just how it works.

Then again, maybe a woman dressed like that is just an attention w****. Either way, she IS going to attract alot of attention.

"most" guys are pigs.

No, not pigs. We are visually stimulated. If a woman wants to dress in sexy outfits, she needs to understand that.

Lorileah, please don't take what I have said the wrong way. I don't mean anything personal. I am a man, and this is what my life experience has shown me.

[Lorileah]

Lorileah, please don't take what I have said the wrong way. I don't mean anything personal. I am a man, and this is what my life experience has shown me.

No harm. I hope you didn't take ME serious

Here's the thing and I think we will pretty much agree on points.

We should be able to dress as we wish without having to explain why as long as we aren't showing genitals or generally being disruptive. Women deserve the same right, however most have figured out that they need to camouflage themselves because somewhere along the line younger males were told "go for it" when women tried to look sexy. Now we complain they don;t and it is OUR fault mostly.

What has been said in this thread isn't true of many men. Most do not think every woman is a chance for conquest. But the ones that do make it hard for women to trust the rest of us. I will go even farther out on this limb and say that the males in this forum DO see the idiocy of the old ways and treat their SO's with more respect.

Until we become a matriarchal society, the entitlement some men fell will continue. That was serious.

Bu now back to male bashing...it is sooo much fun

[MissConstrued]

I will go even farther out on this limb and say that the males in this forum DO see the idiocy of the old ways and treat their SO's with more respect.

I demand you stop this seditious rabble-rousing immediately!

Next thing you know, you'll be telling us to stop beating our wives, allowing them to vote, and even drive.

[Annie D]

Men and women alike are visually stimulated. Why else would we all spend so much time in front of a mirror? Don't tell me that we all don't look at our reflections in storefront windows.

As far as dressing, my skirts are mostly above the knee and yes, sometimes shorter. I prefer skirts over pants and if this is dressing provocatively, then so be it. When I shop at the mall or at the grocery store, I may wear a longer jean or broom skirt and flat sandals but I want to look appropriate for where I am. If I go out to a club and want to dance, then I wear something that I can shake my bootie in. I'm out for a good time and want to feel as girlie (not feminine) as I can. Maybe I am dressing a little dangerously, but with my body build, I am not not that great looking.

Do I look fat in this outfit?

[Kathleengurl]

Dressing like a cop doesn't make you a cop. But you'll get the respect and attention that a cop gets --untill your actions prove you're not a cop.

Dressing like a tramp doesn't make you a tramp......