Giving up Cross Dressing

[Thalia]

I realize most all of you feel that cding is not something one can ultimately control and the urge will always return. Well, there are those of us who desperately want to leave it behind us because of the pain it has brought to our lives. The pain that far outweighs any 'pleasure' or 'enjoyment' we derived from wearing womens' clothing. Without having all of you jump all over me, condemning my decision to try to quit, does anyone know of a legitimate support group on the internet or a support group similar to AA for cross dressers who are not happy with this life style?

[Kathi Lake]

Thalia,

I sure hope that no one here would "jump all over you" for your decision. Crossdressing is simply a facet of your personality. It is not something that you can turn on or off with help of a support group - only suppress. As there are no organizations to help you, may I recommend a good therapist?

I am sorry for the pain it has caused you. In my life, it has caused pain as well - both to me and my wife. I feel that is unfortunate - mostly for the pain it has caused my wife. I don't care about the pain in my life. In my case, I feel that it has brought me so much more joy than pain, so the tradeoff is worth it.

I wish you well.

Kathi

[Marissa]

[SIZE=4]Hi Thalia, I have the same comment as Kathi in hopes that no one would 'jump all over you' about a decision you and only you can make. Some put us against walls and say its me or the highway...but in the end, it was our decision..to live with the reward or the price as of the result of that decision.. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]I was having a similiar conversation, some what, about whether this is what i want.. can i put it away for something that may really need or want.. or is this me.. so you definately are not alone in all this..[/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]Be honest with yourself in respects to the pluses and minuses.. and hope for the best.. who knows, you may never want to slip a pair of hose on again.. or come to the understanding that you can't walk away from it.. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]goodluck on whichever decision you make.. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]Hugs,[/SIZE]

[Noxvictum]

Well, dude, if you can't keep doing it, you can't. I hope everything works out for ya. As far as support groups, google. Just had to say best of luck. Sorry I don't know about the support groups.

[Andy66]

6ood luck to you, dear. ~ hope you find peace and happiness in whatever way works for you.

[Nicole Erin]

support groups - don't know of any...

What you need to realise is there are many levels of TG'ness.
On one end of the spectrum is the 100% passable stealth TS women, but one the other end are the TG who come to grips with who they are and don't feel the need to act on it. Acceptance without action I guess.

Being TG is not how you dress, it is a state of mind.

[Ralph]

Thalia, if you've seen my other posts on the subject you know I'm behind you 100% and I know you can do it. Unfortunately I can't suggest any support groups... you might need to shell out for a shrink if you need external support.

[ClaudiaDawn]

Thalia,

I hope you can find peace and hapiness on any path you decide to take. I feel your pain, crossdressing has brought me a lot of pain and confusion, but I was lucky enough to find someone who loves me unconditionally and who has helped me to learn more about myself.

I am sorry but I don't know any group like the one you are looking for, maybe as Kathi says, a good therapist could help. I wish you the best, and never forget that you deserve to be happy.

Hugs
Claudia Dawn.

[Alice B]

I think your decision to quit is just as tough as the decision to accept cross dressing for many of us. And no one is going to think any less of you. I wish you all the luck in your future life.

[Miranda09]

Best wishes Thalia. One has to do what's right for them. Remember, if you ever need anyone to talk to, we're all here for support no matter which path you choose to follow.

[sterling12]

If you figure that we are "going to jump all over you," then you have obviously read past threads where others have made the try to quit. You also know that most of us don't believe that "truly 100% quiting" is an option. But, good luck to you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.....just be wise and don't burn or throw all your stuff out just yet.

Answering your question, Nope...I haven't heard of any sort of support group for attempting to quit. That might mean several things: 1.) Virtually everyone has been unsuccessful so a "Support Group" that would be ongoing like AA would be superfluous. 2.) Everyone who trys to quit has no problems, so zero need for a support group. 3.) No one has started one.

On that last possibility, there might be some help for you. If YOU started a group, it might get your mind off things, might be a big help. If you do start a group, let folks around here know about it. I'm sure you would find quite a few "takers" who would be interested.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[linnea]

I think your decision to quit is just as tough as the decision to accept cross dressing for many of us. And no one is going to think any less of you. I wish you all the luck in your future life.

Best wishes.

[Angie G]

If you really want to stop dressing I wish you all the luck Thalia. If it dosen't work for you you know your always welcome here. If it dose have a good life and be happy.
Angie

[Lisa Golightly]

Don't know of any support groups but if you have a 'true' friend on here or one IRL who knows about what you do I'm sure that would be enough for the hard days.

I wish you all the best in your journey and hope you find the happiness you seek...

Good luck babes

Lisa xxxx

[shayleetv]

Boy, after reading your post about blackmail. You should find a really, really good therapist. I can't imagine the pressure you are under. I went for nearly 30 years without dressing completely. I was a very miserable human being. If I had had someone to help me cope with the circumstance that brought my misery I might have been a better husband and father instead of the workaholic I became. I have a good relationship with my wife and children now but only after help through a good therapist. Good fortune to you and success

[Deborah Jane]

Good luck with your decision to quit Thalia, it won't be easy as you know, but I truly hope you succeed where others can't and you find the happiness you seek

[Rachaelb64]

Good luck, I hope you find peace with yourself what ever path you take

[Vicky_Scot]

All the best Thalia.

You may never put on any female attire ever again but you will always be a crossdressers.

But I am so sad to read that it has brought so much pain and hurt to you.

I will be thinking about you.

Xx Vicky xX

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Dear Thalia-

I can't even imagine anyone here or on any other site getting on you because you want to stop crossdressing. It is a burden for many and especially for spouses and family. I truly wish you the best of luck.

And I hope you won't take this wrong, but I also read the thread about your wife using your being TG to extort property from you and blackmail you with it. She sounds like a horrid person. There, I said it. I know you must love her, but no one who really cares for someone else would do what she is doing.

Once again, Thalia, the very best of luck. My heart goes out to you.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[PaulaJaneThomas]

You will fail. You will be miserable. No-one around you will care because they don't care about you, they only care about their own grubby prejudices. Have a nice time

[PrettyFlowingGown]

For me, If I stopped dressing, my life would be gone, then I'd be in pain, and I'm not kidding. I'd be very unhappy. But if its what you want, go ahead. I wish you the best.

[Sally2005]

The only advice based on my own experience is this. Try to accept who you are and forget what other people think. No one can tell you what to think. It might be possible for you to be happy letting some of your feminine feelings, ideas, thoughts out as part of your male persona (without anyone knowing)...and you can feel good yourself about it knowing what you know.

If you deny who you are or what is driving you, the urge will come back even stronger in the future. I think the key is to not deny your feelings...it might be possible to do without actually dressing if you find some other outlets.

[cdoll]

I don't think I could ever quit either. I have gone for periods without dressing but always went back. Now I think this is a part of my life.

[Joanne f]

Hello Thalia,
this is a support forum for all who have or have had problems with Cd, Tg ,Ts issues, so i see that there would be no problem in supporting the ones who wish to find a way out which in some case`s may be harder than to finding a way in .
Maybe there should be a section for the "help me get out of this" ones where it might have ideas on how do help with that , ( OK so i am mad ) and then we may find out if there is actually a way out .
The only thing i could suggest at the moment is to find something else to do when you get the urge to Cd in that way your mind will be focus on something else.

[MichelleP]

Hi Thalia,

Peace and strength to you on your quest. I would like to paraphrase Thoreau and Holmes by saying:

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the 'girl' still in them.”

Michelle