Once again thanks for your opinions, I am sorry if I offend anyone with this issue it wasn't my intention I just feel more liberated and besides the common denominator here is acceptance
Once again thanks for your opinions, I am sorry if I offend anyone with this issue it wasn't my intention I just feel more liberated and besides the common denominator here is acceptance
People in general have in the past always put cd'ing and gay in the same catagory. As a cd'er we usually are disliked by both straight and gay communities. In either the gay or cd communities we as individuals should except both views as it is out of "the Norm" per say. I don't care who you are straight, bi,cd,ts, whatever i will be a friend of all unless as an individual you treat me wrong. I was prejudice as a child. In my foxhole in Nam was a gay black man. When he stayed awake, I could sleep. Now I give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I hope I'm giving the Same.
IMHO being gay and being a crossdresser are two different things, thus I can not say which one is worse. It is a fair question, but selecting one as being worse is in some ways saying there is something wrong or bad with one or both. I do not felt that way about either.
In general, society likes labels and stereotypes because they are easy and serve a purpose when facts are not available. Many stereotypes are partially or occasionally correct; however, the truth often becomes distorted or hijacked over time when applied with a wide brush. Ignorance, which is not the same as stupidity, often drives stereotypes and labels. Once I learned to ignore stereotypes and overly simplistic labels and stopped using them myself especially in a judgmental manner, I found myself being happier with who and what I am. I am a person and not a label. I owe the same courtesy to others.
Last edited by Melissa Rose; 10-12-2009 at 10:43 AM. Reason: Typo repair
I'm not even exactly sure what 'being gay' really means, much less where it places you on the Ladder of Human Worthiness in relation to 'being a cross dresser.'
And so we go, on with our lives...
We know the Truth, but prefer Lies.
Lies are simple, simple is Bliss.
Why go against tradition, when we can admit defeat,
Live in Decline, be the victim of our own design?
I can't say one is worst; they are just label that have applied to people without consideration to the person behind the label. We are more then just a label. I'm bi love being with guys, sometimes more so than girl, have a wife and also a CD's at 57 years old
I don't think people here "defend their sexuality" to suggest that they are somehow better than any other group. It is pretty common in this forum for the members to be have GG SOs. Naturally one of the first questions their SO are going to ask is "are you gay?" because it is a common misconception that being a cross dresser and being gay are related. For "straight" CDs, which I believe is the statistical majority, they often want to make it clear that they are not gay to put their wife/girlfriend's mind at ease, since if they were that could easily end the relationship. I think, and certainly hope, that no one on this forum claims to be better than anyone else by dint of their sexuality.
Obviously we do claim to be way better than normal people because we are cross dressers, straight, gay or otherwise, or supporters thereof<Just kidding - no flames please>
Its like asking if pecan pie is worse than apple pie. Neither is better or worse. Its what you are and what you like that maters. I say, "to each, their own".
Being gay vs. being a crossdresser is like comparing peaches and plums. Of course, there are nectarines.....
I think if it is people I know then I would want to be know as a crossdresser. If I don't know them or barely know them then I would rather be considered gay. Like Christina W said being gay is seen as something that people can accept. However, I want people I know to know the truth, that I am a crossdresser.
So it follows that on average, everybody is 6% gay.Originally Posted by Katie B
And so we go, on with our lives...
We know the Truth, but prefer Lies.
Lies are simple, simple is Bliss.
Why go against tradition, when we can admit defeat,
Live in Decline, be the victim of our own design?
The importance of this distinction comes when you are a hetero CDer in a relationship and you come out to your SO. One of the first questions is: "Does that mean you're gay then?"
The SO, in this context, probably sees being gay as a worse scenario because it seems to kick away one of the foundations of the relationship.
A same-sex acquaintance might ask the same question hoping for the opposite answer. So it's all about context.
Other than that, in the regular free-floating human cultural milieu, being gay and being a CDer are just two positions we can take on the large and vaguely defined spectrum of human gender expression and sexual preference. Some cultures attach value judgements to positions on the spectrum. But really, it's preposterous to make comparisons.
[SIZE="2"]Always be true to yourself because the people who matter don’t mind, and the people who mind don’t matter.[/SIZE]
Being gay is not cool and is worse than being a crossdresser. God does not approve gay sex but clothes are just clothes and I think God would forgive crossdressing. GAY sex is Sodom and Gomorah stuff, and God destroyed a whole city for that.
I wish Barbara had worded the question differently, such as, "Is it better to be gay or a crossdresser?" This would not have the implication that there is something wrong in being gay or a crossdresser. I think God will forgive me for my gay experiences, I pray that the Fashion Police forgive me for my crossdressing.
It takes a real man to wear a dress.
Um, ...gosh, where do I start?
You THINK God would forgive crossdressing?
Let me ask you this; If you caught your son repeatedly crossdressing even after you wrote it on his bedroom wall that he "shall not" do such a thing, what would you do? Kill him? Burn him? Beat him? Kick him out? Damn him to an eternity in hell?
Just curious.
I'm not gonna address the gay comment. I suspect it would be a waste of valuable keyboard clicks anyway.
-Misty
Well as a man I'm straight. I only like girls. As a women I'm a lesbian. I only like girls.
As my Tag Line says, underneath all I am a man! Not gay or Bi, just a heterosexual man who loves to wear pretty feminine clothing! From the skin out!
And to paraphrase Jeanna's Tag line; I am like the weather, I do not pay attention to criticism of what I wear! Well, unless you count criticism of my outfit as not matching correctly!!
Stephanie
Lady on the outside, but man underneath!
My Priest didn't say anything bad about crossdressing and I have even gone to church in skirt suits.
I would only warn my son that crossdressing is cursed.
GAY sex is an unnatural adultery. If you crave that kind of action just get yourself a sex toy and mannequin...
Kate, I suggest you think long and hard before posting again. First of all, learn to think for yourself, and secondly learn to think what effect your words might have on others who might actually believe the nonsense you spout.
It's you who's spouting nonsense, and you just don't have the stomach to tolerate my views which I have a right to express. Otherwise it's like saying being gay is popular which it is not; - it makes you an outcast.
There's nothing wrong with either. But being gay can be bad for a heterosexual relationship obviously. I assure you that no gay man would want his partner thinking he was really straight. I have found that balancing my energy has led me, myself to be bicurious. So, such thoughts aren't unfounded.
While you do have the right to believe what you will and express your beliefs, Kate, you are being insensitive by saying what you are in your posts, as I'm sure the moderators will agree. Misty made the mistake of responding to your post which was very offensive to homosexuals, and Kara took a wrong step in suggesting that what you're saying is nonsense. This is not something you should be discussing in this thread.
As it is in the nature of man to resist or dislike anything he doesnt know/understand. The society resisted gay activities for a long time may be religious condemnation of the act greatly contributed, but right after gay pple expressed themselves and came out to the world things started getting better and also due to the fact that the issue of being gay is a bit straight forward i.e "a guy having sexual interests in other guys". But for crossdressers there are a lot of complications CDs do not show themselves as pple with a distinct personality and also the sexual identity of a CD is a bit complicated.
Other factor that contribute to the stigmatization of the CDs is the fact the CD activity is a bit reclusive we often get labeled as "freaks" so i guess CDs are worst off.
As far as moral issues are concerned i see that there is no difference so one would be no better or worse that the other, but as far as the general public is concerned i would say that being a cross dresser is worse because very few understand why we do it therefor their imagination runs wild and usually comes up with the wrong reasons why we Cd.
And to make things a bit more complicated i would say that in general being gay would be worse if you are in a relationship with someone of the opposite sex.
So it really boils down to who`s perspective you are looking at it from .
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Joanne
If you want to lose your faith, make friends with a priest
I have some gay friends.. I do not consider them outcasts at all !
You have your right to your opinions Kate but please be aware not all of us share those opinions
Barbara, does such a thing really matter in this day of age. When I was in my freshman year of college I dated this wonderful guy and things were great. One day my mom asked if I was gay and to her surprize my answer was no I was in love with this guy and that was that!! When I started to crossdress I did not sit there and ponder will people think i'm gay because I wear a dress, NO. The truth is we are who we are and that's all. Love is an emotion that we all have and share in different ways. The cloths we wear the people we hang with does not matter I believe the world as a hole has much bigger problems then who people choose to love and the cloths they wear to express themselves.
P.S. Barbara, you are a very wonderful gay crossdresser and so nice to share time learning about you!!
Love Always,
Wendi
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