Would I date a CD

[AlisonRenee]

There goes my plan to ask you out to dinner....

Just out of curiosity, why do you think a regular masc guy would want to date a TS?


All the Best,

Ann

Only if that regular masculine guy was completely secure in his masculinity and saw the TS as a person rather than the sum of her parts, whatever they might be. I'm afraid that rules out most regular masculine guys. We live in a culture that typically likes to label deviations from the norm as deviates.

[Katesback]

I dont expect that most guys would be able to date a TS (myself included) it is what it is.

[joandher]

[QUOTE=skirtsuit;1950135]There goes my plan to ask you out to dinner....

Just out of curiosity, why do you think a regular masc guy would want to date a TS?

Tell me dear what did your wife or G/F think of you when you were C/Ding,and how did other C/Ders treat you before gender reassignment, or have you forgot about your past ????

I think you are just trying to wind people up

J-JAY

[Katesback]

Very good question. Back in the days of crossdressing my wife knew about it from the very first DATE. She had no desire to partake in the activity since as she put it "if she wanted to date a girl she would".

She found the CD thing to be really wierd, she found it aggrivating that I would spend money on clothes I hardly ever wore. Basically she was not very accepting. Can I fault her for this? Well yes but at the same time I understood that she wanted a man and generally speaking men dont dress as women.

Wether or not I liked her perspective made no difference. Is it fair? Perhaps not, but we all have a right to date whoever we want.

Is it fair that a guy probably wont date a TS girl like me if he were to find out? Probably not but I do respect the wishes and desires of everyone.

[Katrina]

If, and I stress IF, I was single, I would only date somebody who was ok with dating a CD/TS person since I'm somewhere in between. If you aren't cool with that, then we are NOT compatible. If I was to date a person born male, they would have to be seriously trans - I couldn't date a man.

[kellycan27]

There goes my plan to ask you out to dinner....

Just out of curiosity, why do you think a regular masc guy would want to date a TS?


All the Best,

Ann

Because................. I am engaged to one

[johnboy23]

I would not date a black person. Sorry to offend you but your families are WAY too wild for me. I also would not date a goat.... Too country.

[Sheila]

Because................. I am engaged to one

nice one Kelly ............. and okay I am a GG but I married a TS lady last month do I count

[Celeste]

I've dated cd's and have always had a great time,I find it quite liberating and think it helps lesson the stress and stigma I place on dressing from time to time.At first I was pretty apprehensive about it,now I see it as sharing something special about myself with someone who really cares.

[Deborah Jane]

okay I am a GG but I married a TS lady last month do I count

I can vouch for that

[Lorileah]

I don't make any preconceived ideas about who I would date. BUT I will draw the line at a CD unless they wore a different size clothing than I do...no one touches my closet (besides she would be like all conservative and be on my case about too much make up or too little cloth in the skirt and next thing you know I am looking at some other drag queen and she would be like "you don't think I am as pretty as that DQ?" Next thing you know I am walking home in the rain with a broken heel and my mascara running down my face and my "ex" is dating the DQ)...and you wonder why I like sheep

[joandher]

PLEASE tell me have you had surgery yet, and are you ,or is your wife still with you????

J-JAY

[Toni_Lynn]

Wow! This is a can of worms to be sure.

I can understand some of what you are saying, but I find it to be far too rigid in what sounds like a rejection of all crossdressers based on what you perceive us to be.

Just out of curiosity, why do you think a regular masc guy would want to date a TS?

Tell me dear what did your wife or G/F think of you when you were C/Ding,and how did other C/Ders treat you before gender reassignment, or have you forgot about your past ????

I think you are just trying to wind people up
J-JAY

I find J-Jay's statements just quoted to be a question that YOU must answer. Or could it be you have never suffered the indignity of prejudice because you are TS as to give you carte blanche to make the brash statements you have made.

Is your own judgement based on the activity of a few. How would you like it we as CDers based our attitude about TSs on your snobbish, if not holier than thou attitude. How dare you judge us as men! How dare you judge us as a person who has cried because of equally tormenting conflicts inside. How dare you judge!

(Hmm -- I best settle down)

I'd like to frame my thoughts this way. In Canada, there is a separatist movement seeing to establish Quebec as a nation apart and sovereign from Canada, because they speak French and have a unique culture. I do not like the fact these people seek to destroy what I see as the most beautiful and peaceful nation, one that I hope to call my home someday. Yet I do not hate the French speaking people of Quebec. I now that not all seek to separate. At the same time, while I hate the separatist movement, I would love to sit down and talk with Lucien Bouchard, one of the leaders of it. I would like to call him a friend, even though I disagree with him. While I strongly disagree with him, the man is no phony, and that means a great deal to me. Unlike most of those whom I do may disagree with, Bouchard is intellectually honest.

Your statements seem to belie that vis a vis your opinions or where you are in your transition. Substitute you as a TS for the whole of Canada, and CDers as Quebec, and you will understand.

Toni-Lynn

[sherri]

I wrote this post for a couple reasons. One I was I wanted to see what your responses would be. Two I wanted to see if you could critically see the point I was making. Of all the responses I saw only a couple that did see what I wrote.

For clarification. I never said I would not date a CD. I only said it would take some serious thought. Second I said if I was to date a man what I want is a man. Third I said if I did date a CD I would not wish to participate in the trans stuff like shopping, makeup, ect.

We all have a right to choose who we date. Some of us date only Jewish people, some only date black people, some date people that have certain attributes that others dont have. Others choose to date people that exhibit only attributes that are the gender they were born with!

Now any of you that see me as looking down on someone, see me being an eletist, you REALLY lost the point here.

I dont see myself any better than anyone else, also I could care less if someone said they didnt date TS girls. So what!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe you don't think you're better, maybe you do, but this smug, condescending post is even more offensive than the first one. I get your point, honey, I just don't like your style. And there still isn't anything constructive about starting such a thread unless you were asked. I'm fine with you having every right to your dating preferences, but how many people on this forum do you see clamoring to date a TS? It's a non-issue. I think you just like jerking people's chains -- a sure sign, in my book, of someone who REALLY doesn't get it.

[aggi123]

I'm just throwing this out there. The reason I feel somewhat attacked by your original post is because I'm struggling to find someone that can accept me for me. Reading your post only makes me feel that there's less chance of finding that woman. I wonder if I'll ever find her. I know your post isn't exactly that situation, but it kinda makes me think that way.

[Fab Karen]

I wouldn't date a cross dresser either......or a gg, or a gay man. Not that I have anything against being any of these, just not my thing. I imagine that there are quite a few cross dressers that wouldn't date a TS as many have stated that they are attracted to GG's. I don't see anyone labeling them as "elitist".
Personally I feel that there probably are a lot of cder's that possess qualities that I may be attracted to, but I tend to narrow the dating pool to what my preconceived notion (if you will) of what I am looking for to single.str8, non-gg,non-cd people. Why turn this into a "us against "them" argument? We all have different tastes and preferences. I don't take offence to someone saying that they woudn't date a TS... Different strokes for different folks. Kelly

She at least claims to be open to the idea, while at the same time spewing condescension. That's different than saying it strictly isn't a person's preference. And as someone else said, what's the point of making this topic?

[PrincessTia]

I forgot to mention I would date a CD WAY before I would date a TS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I should have said that at the beginning. I would also probably date a girl before I dated a boy.

On the other hand I have not been on a date in a good while now and I turn down a lot of offers. People ask my why I dont date. My answer is I like my life simple, I like to not have to deal with other peoples crap, I like riding my motorcycle, going for walks, roller derby, and whatever I want to do whenever I want to do it without EVER having to answer to what, when, where, and why.

KAtie

Perhaps I'm missing something here. How are you using the terms CD and TS?

Tia

[PetiteDuality]

I wrote this post for a couple reasons. One I was I wanted to see what your responses would be. Two I wanted to see if you could critically see the point I was making. Of all the responses I saw only a couple that did see what I wrote.

Gee, I was defending your point, but this is really condescending.

You was basically checking if forum members were able to get the point you was making...

What are your conclusions? How many "passed" (no pun intended) your test? Are we critical enough for your taste?

[karen68]

Oh dear, it seems that this is a very sticky subject to some, everybody is allowed their say or are we in a dictatorship site here. There are cd's that will or will not date ts's or guys or gg and that goes for each and every one of us weather you are gg, ts, guy, cd. So lets all and make up eh


PS. love can do strange things so you never know whom or what you find attractive if the person ticks the right boxes then whats the problem.

[dilane]

There goes my plan to ask you out to dinner....

1) Just out of curiosity, why do you think a regular masc guy would want to date a TS?

2) I think you are just trying to wind people up

J-JAY

J-Jay,

1) Trust me, they're out there! I encounter them with some regularity ...

2) I agree.

[sherri52]

Kate: As a cd'er I can say one thing. You miss the boat. You will never find a man who can relate to you as well as a cd'er. We in our needs and wants to cd we have found that girlish inner side that has feelings, feelings that most men couldn't possibly understand.

[kellycan27]

She at least claims to be open to the idea, while at the same time spewing condescension. That's different than saying it strictly isn't a person's preference. And as someone else said, what's the point of making this topic?

I did mention what I thought in regards to the OP. I am not quite understanding what you mean by saying "at least she". If you are referring to my not being open to dating a CD...Let me ask you this. According to the cder's in this forum 85% are str8. My personal preference is boys which leaves me with about 15% to draw from. Of those 15% how many are in my age group?How many are single? and how many of those would want to take the male lead in a relationship with someone who identifies as a girl? I would say that this narrows it down a bit. Gay guys tend to want to be with other guys, I have no interest in GG's. I live, work and play in the mainstream, so I tend to meet and interact with same, as I am not into the scene....gay bars and such.
For me as a TS I face the same problems in finding an accepting SO that str8 cross dressers do. I don't know the percentage of str8 mainstream guys who would be open to having a relationship with a TS,but given my situation and my sexual preference I have to work with what I have. If the statistics with regards to cross dressers is correct, it kind of precludes me from finding a meaningful relationship. So yes, I have ruled out dating cross dressers. If I have totally missed your point...................never mind.

Kel

[Fab Karen]

Yes, you missed the point. "she at least" is referring to the original poster, not you. I was saying nothing about you. The OP said if she did have a relationship with a CD, she'd never go shopping with them,or go out with them in public in femme mode.

[DaphneGrey]

She is winding everyone up! Who cares what she thinks she looks down her nose at crossdressers that is painfully obvious. My advice don't pay attention.

[Karen564]

So,
What exactly was the purpose of this thread???
I seemed to of missed the point...
Is it to get Cders to hate Ts's even more??
Personally, I could care less who dates who,
So, yea, in all honesty I want a str8 guy, but who cares what I prefer, because it's really nobody's business on this board..and knowing that's there's too much dissension as it is here between us, I can't see throwing gas on the fire..

I'd save these preferences for a dating site, but not here..