Victory is mine! Or at least acceptability!

[Daniela76]

YAY!!!

I came out to my boss on Monday. I had promised my coworker that I would be dressed on Tuesday so I had to!! A lady can't break a promise to a sister! My boss was okay with it but went into super managerial protective "follow the rules" mode. I see this being weird with him.

Today I wore black mary janes, black knee highs, black dress slacks, a longline shaper, black (with pink bow) bra, & a nice short sleeve blouse. The blouse was sort of multi-colored with black, red, gold, brown in it. I fixed my hair in a very cute style & put on concealer & lip gloss. I wore my new brown coat I got last week. I felt so beautiful!!

On the way to work I got a call that another store needed help. The store happened to be my old boss. He had previously told me "you're not getting another earring if you're working in my store." Yes, he cannot legally say that, but I respect him & he respects me so I didn't care. I went in to my store to pick up my lab coat & got a compliment on how pretty I looked from my store manager. My pharmacist was jealous of the coat also!! I came out then to the 2 younger girls I work with. One, a really nice black girl (T) who has worked at VS was really cool with it. The other (N), the tattooed, pierced party chick was visibly concerned & replied "okay, different strokes for different folks." Pretty much what I expected from her.

I then went to the other store & my old boss noticed a bit & called me dapper & natty. He didn't really know what else to say. I found it very funny!! I also had to work with another female pharmacist who is really annoying. I just worked hard & acted as feminine as I could & it was great!!
Left there, went to Subway with purse & coat & ordered lunch.

Went back to my store, got there just before N had to leave & she was acting weird but okay. T had been asking the other T questions & was worried about talking behind my back. She assured her that I was very open about it and everything was okay. I talked to her a bunch when I got back & made jokes & asked her about CD'ers at VS. She said she had dealt with a lot of them. Told two others also, guy & girl. They were both okay with it. It was the guy's 2nd day in our pharmacy, but he seems pretty cool.
It was a great night & I talked to another couple store employees before I left. They were really supportive & glad I am so happy.

One bad part when I was leaving. My mom had called so I called her back. She wanted to have dinner on Wed night since I'm not working. I told her I had made plans to go learn about makeup & may have it on. She doesn't want to have dinner now. Oh well, it's gonna take her awhile.

So my plan is to go to Bally's tomorrow, then a mall & go to Bare Escentuals & have makeup put on me to see what I can look like. Can't buy anything yet, but will go back this weekend if I like it!!

Sorry that was so long, but I had to share everything!

Dani's first day out!! And my coworkers are starting to call me it too!!

[Rianna Humble]

Way to go girl!

I'm glad it all went so well for you.

Bit of a downer about your mum,but give her time, I'm sure that her motherly love will be able to overcome her misgivings.

[msniki48]

Kudos to you Danielle!

That is a big step....does your job entail working with the public as a pharmacist also?

I am so very happy for you, as financial concerns are some of the biggest concerns we have, especially if we are looking for a 24/7 life style change...although we have protection laws...they have a long way to go

here's to acceptance!....YEAHHHH!


hugs


msniki48

[SusanMarie]

Awesome...amazing...congrats...

As for Mom...all good things in time.

[Kathi Lake]

Wow, Dani! You surely have got to be a strong person to do this. It sounds like one maor hurdle is done, now only a few (or a few hundred) left to go! With your attitude, it shouldn't be a problem.

Kathi

[Daniela76]

Thanks for the kind words & support sisters!!

The week has gotten even better.

Wednesday I went to a health club & worked out in women's workout wear. Fila capri's & workout t (black) with a sportbra underneath. Loved it!!

Then went to Bare Escentuals & had my makeover. LOVED IT!

Then walked through the mall with my makeup on & walked into Borders. Saw my roommate! Uh-oh, he didn't know about me yet. He looked at me, said, "uh, nice shoes, I'm heading home now." HA!!!
Got home & talked to him, he is tolerable of it but doesn't understand it at all. Highly homophobic & threatened me if I came on to him at all. I told him he has too much penis for my liking!

Then called my aunt (who is very caring of me & also the mother of my cousin who I live with) & told her. She was quite shocked but understands what I am dealing with. She said I should tell my cousin soon so he didn't find out weirdly. She thought he would be quite freaked out about it, as did I. So I prayed about it that night & didn't yet know what to do.

Thursday at work, I get a call, but missed it. Then another call while using the washroom. From my cousin, who is in the store!!!! AAAGGHH!! I played dumb when he said he couldn't find me. Let him leave & decided I had to tell him that night.

Thursday night, hanging out with him & Greg (first roommate who is very supportive). Wearing guy shorts & t-shirt when Adam says, "Did you shave your legs??? WHY??" So I said, "let's play a game called let's share a secret. We'll all sit around the dining room table. But I'll be the only one sharing a secret." So I told him. Wait for it, wait for it...

He was completely understanding!! OMG!!! Christ be praised!!

He said he could understand my life leading me to feel like this & that he still loved me & would stand by me. We talked a bit more & had some fun with it. We also prayed for me to be able to find a new place to live. While they are okay with seeing me come & go en femme, they really don't want to see it all the time. Which I understand & accept.

So I had looked on craigslist for reasonable places to live. Sent a couple emails to one that were only women & looking for women or were somewhat open. Heard back on one of them which sounded promising. But I called a different one.

That one was a lady renting out rooms looking for a "female, non-smoker, but we're flexible." They have yoga & pilates classes there & it said they have it as a healing house, transitional living for people who need a safe place to get on their feet.
Called, left a VM asking some questions & she called back a little bit later, but it went to my VM. So I called her back & explained my situation & she was completely willing to meet me & have me look at the house.

Got up today, got ready, went downstairs, & my cousin saw me. I look way too much like his mother!! He was quite freaked out by it, but laughed about it also. I was wearing my brown Skecher sneakers, tan pantyhose, brown corduroy skirt (knee-length & flouncy pleated) & a paisley brown/red top with 3/4 sleeves, empire waist & cut rather low but decently.

Left the house, went to DSW to buy the red mary jane wedges I liked. Then called my aunt on the way to the meet the nice lady. Told her everything & she was very happy to hear how it went.

Got to the house, met the gal. She was really cute & nice. Seemed kinda shy, but I am like 6 inches taller than her. Got to talk to her & learned about the house. She showed me the room & we talked some more on the living room couch (which looks out onto a lake!!) The house is kinda old & frumpy, but not in bad shape. I was talking to her about the house & my life & I became very overwhelmed by joy & love. I knew I had to live there & be part of their life.
I almost cried even!!
Visited with her for about an hour total & had some tea. Learned some more about all 3 of the women there.
Shayla, 30, the girl I met, is a yoga & fitness instructor & health conscious gal. She has 2 kids who are there on the weekends.
Another one is 37 & has one son who lives with her there. The other lady is 40'ish. They both are photographers & have other businesses too.
This definitely seems like a place I need to be. These women can help me immensely on my path to transition.
I just have to find out if I can leave my house soon, & come up with $800 for rent, deposit & utilities. GRR! I think I might be able to do it though. And the room I would be renting is pretty big so I could have lots of storage for my crap that I can work on getting rid of!!

Went to work & the day went great, but the p-hose were a little tight. I couldn't wear the new shoes cause the shoes I wore yesterday caused a blister on my heel that these rubbed in exactly the same spot. When it heals I think it will be fine though. People must have thought my outfit was some traditional wear because I kept getting asked, "what's the occasion, some kind of holiday?" "Nope, I'm just transitioning to living as a woman." Got a few supportive replies to that even!!

I also today made an appointment at the UofMN Transgender Health Services clinic. That appt is in 11 days only!!

I then got to leave work early, so I went to the Mall of America & shopped for a bit & ate dinner. I wanted tights mainly. Yes I was dressed en femme in the MoA!!! Got knee-high stockings at one store & tights at another store. I had trouble finding tights because I wanted light tan & those are harder to find. I did get called sir by the guy at Noodles, dammit!! Oh well.

Yay for another great day!! Off to pray & sleep for work tomorrow.

[Rianna Humble]

That's just SO encouraging! I'm really pleased for you about your cousin and your aunt - do you think they might work on your mum to get her to understand?

Not only that, but you found a new place to live where they will support you in your transition

I wouldn't have the courage to go to the gym, so I really admire you for doing it. And how brave you are, telling the others about your transition like that!

Best of luck at the clinic, please let us know how you get on.

[Maija]

I hope things continue to go well for you.