Man, I envy all you folks who had the cojones to start young. I'm 34 and just now starting to, er, "man up," as it were.
Man, I envy all you folks who had the cojones to start young. I'm 34 and just now starting to, er, "man up," as it were.
Probably late twenties/early thirties. That's about when I realized several things: most of the SA's I lied to in the past probably knew it; I got better assistance by saying it was for me; I got a kick out of it (excitement); they found it fun and amusing.
On many occasions I showed SA's pics of me en femme. Never had a bad experience, other than one scowl from an old biddy at JCPenney while buying pantyhose. My best experiences were in wig shops. I mean, come on, who buys other people wigs?
Never have, never been asked either although a few have hinted that they thought it was for me
I never have told them, I figure that it is none of their business. Like others have said, they really do not care. I know my size, if it doesn't fit I just exchange it or return it.
I haven't tried it yet, however just recently a SA asked me if my purchase was for my wife or daughter and I answered,"Yes", she just smiled and rang me up.
It is amazing how helpful the SAs are. I am glad I started relatively young. I am really impressed with those of you who started in your teens or 50 and above.
Just another man in a dress
It was quite awhile ago, in my late 40s, and I did it because I was tired of making up stories. I just thought, "Who cares?"
warmly, Linnea
It has a lot to do with what is in your own mind and how that transfers to the shop keeper.
Are you furtivly buying panties to wank in or are you carefully planning on dressing convincingly as the kind of lady that the assistant might be comfortable with.
My fear leads me to look like an embarassed bloke buying stuff for his wife, I am often approached and find it too easy to brush off offers of assistance.
Reading all the above I feel the need to get properly involved in the shopping experience. New years res.
say yes they are for me and see how it turns out
As I mentioned in another post, I bought some stay ups and made no attempt to pretend they were for my wife (since they were size F). The clerk cheerfully gave me an opened pair from the stock room.., I guess I was in my early 30's.
I was 43 and I was at a Dress Barn where I had been introduced to the manager by someone from Tri-Ess so I knew I was in a safe place.
The manager brought me all sorts of stuff to try on and it was really fun.
Of course just last week a SA at Target asked if I needed help while I was looking at a skirt and I mumbled no thanks.
Well a step forward and a step backwards.
I have been admitting this for 5 years. SA are always helpful and they always say ENJOY your Night. They know what I intend to do in my new lingerie. One SA is very helpful and always shows me the most sexy sheer lingerie and offers suggestions as to how I might match it to previous purchases.
Recently Imade a purchase and had coffee near the store. the SA who served me came in for coffee and just came over and asked if she could sit with me. She openly discussed my purchases with me and gave some advice onlaundering my "pretty things". I admitted to her without any prompting that It was a sexual thing. She simply said that all women who buy sexy lingerie intend to have sex in it so why shouldnt I. I am a repeat customer and she has seen me in Bra panties and stockings. I love being out to her and in some small way being her (girl) Friend.
When I was 17 and started shopping alone and told the SA that I was looking for dresses and skirts for me and helped me pick the right ones and made me try it on.
I was 45 before I told the SA that I was shopping for myself. That was a little over a year ago - about the time I started dressing in public. Moral of the story? If you're going to do it, do it right. Tell them! They already know!
Kathi
Buying for myself
Two years ago in Gatineau,Quebec I was in a Pennigtons and they had a huge sale on bras.I was almost mesmerized by the prices($5.00) for really nice bras.A beautiful young French girl asked if she could help me and I blurted out that I was not sure what size to buy.After the smallest hint of a blush she took me to the back fitting rooms and measured me up.She brought me at least 12 or 14 to try on.Deciding on 3 she was so positive I should try the matching panties.The whole experience for me was awesome.I was 46 years old and haven't stopped shopping for myself since.
My first time was 1977, I was 26, I bought a wig from a local Frederick's of Hollywood store.
Carol
My name is Carol.
First time I said it was for me I was about 30 and was ordering from JC Penney by phone. Seemed pretty easy and really broke the ice. In my 40's I went to a dept store for cosmetics and finally came out with it and said the cosmetics were for me and asked about putting on foundation, eye liner etc. It was so easy and the SA was great. Since then I have always told the truth and have gotten excellent service. The SA's have "been there and done that", so we should really let them know it is for us we are shopping.
I hope those that are nervous about saying "its for me" get over it.
I think it might of been about 2 years ago, but most of the time, I think that they know it's for me even if they don't ask, by the time i spend looking at what'll suit me before i buy it
Although i'm a witch, I can be nice as well (honestly)
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I was in my mid 30's, just buying some stay ups at a lingerie store - the SA first checked to see if I had the size right, when I said yes, she realized they were for me, she gave me a big warm smile, asked me to wait and ran back into the stock room. She came back with an opened box of garter stockings - she gave them to me for free because they couldn't sell opened merchandise. From then on, I shopped quite openly for myself at that and other stores.
I think I was 18 or 17 when I bought a pair of pantyhose. The SA gave me a small look, but continued on and sent me off. I look forward to the not-so-faraway future when I'll shop without a care.
A bit of a different story for me. My mom always rather wished I had been born a girl and indulged my own predilection for girly things by putting nail polish and lipstick on me from time to time when I was little. Knowing that I had been in her closet from time to time and that her things didn't really fit me very well, when I was 12 she told me I should have a pair of girl shoes of my own. She took me to the fancy downtown department store where she did most of her own shopping (and had once worked herself, so she knew many of the SAs there), and helped me try on and pick out a pair of navy blue pumps with about a 2-3/4" heel. I had on mostly boy clothes but was wearing earrings, lipstick, mascara, pantyhose and red nails at the time, so there wasn't much doubt about my intentions! So I was outed to the SAs by my own mother, before I reached puberty! It wasn't too hard to tell them on my own after that experience.
- Diane
I still haven't told any sales associates that I'm shopping for myself. I figure that they can assume I'm shopping for myself when I ask to use the fitting rooms. None of them have really asked if I'm shopping for a wife or girlfriend or anything like that, actually.
It was at age 42 that I told a saleswomen that I wanted to try on some dresses. I was tired of saying that it was for my wife or girlfriend when I bought them. It was not a warm response but she carried the clothes into the mens changing for me and she let me leave the ones I did not purchase in the changing room.
I think around 21
For me it was in my twenties in a very haphazard way as it had more to do with making it obvious the stuff was for me than coming right out and admitting it to the SA. It was also very infrequent as I didn't have a lot of money and couldn't afford to buy things very often.
Then in my forties I went for a bra fitting, which opened the floodgates so to speak. Going up to the SA at the counter and admitting you are bra shopping for yourself but need to be measured first changed me. Especially as the first SA then turned me over to one of their 'fitters', who I then had to admit the same thing to. That plus the fact that almost immediately I was naked from the waist up in front of the fitter (a woman who I've just met a couple of minutes previous) as she measured me, helped me try on bras and commented on how each one looked on me and fit me. As both SA's were so supportive and the product was so much more intimate than dresses or shoes, I have found ever since then I don't have any problem admitting I'm shopping for myself.
At least that's true when it is a female SA. I'm not sure I would be quite as open with a male SA if it ever came to that, although there was one time at Payless that I admitted to a seemingly gay male SA that I was high heel shopping for myself. My most recent shopping experience was just yesterday, when I went into a store that carries fun sparkly clothes. I had passed the store dozens of times before, but I would always just look but not go in the store. This time I went in, asked to try on a dress I liked, bought it and the twenty something SA (who was cool throughout the whole thing) told me to "have fun" as I was leaving. I find having that kind of experience makes the disapproving look type experience that sometimes happens easier to ignore.
I was 26 this was just over a year ago, when I was out of town on Business and went to Victoria's Secret and got a bra fitting and bought some panties and other lingerie. I admitted to the SA that it was for me and she was really helpful.
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