How do SAs genenerally react to us??? I am soon to go out shopping en femme and am curious to know how we are treated. Do they laugh, giggle, ignore, ridicule us? Or are they hostile and dismissive? OR, do you find that they enjoy a chance to have fun with a not-so-typical customer??
Thnks
Laura in very high heels today...
You are NOT crossdressed until you are wearing high heels!
the erotic black patent stiletto heel... surely there is no greater aphrodisiac??
Laura,
I've gone shopping once or twice (stifling giggles), and I can tell you what I've found - almost universal acceptance. Sure, there have been a few who have been like your fears are telling you they all are - rude or giggling or just bored. On the whole, they have treated me as everything from just another woman to almost a rock star. Women get it. They know that clothes and hair and makeup are more fun than a barrel full of ferrets. They can usually tell pretty quickly if you are serious, and will gladly lend a hand. Our perception of inexperience brings out the "mother hen" in them, and they are usually sooooo helpful with styles, fit and more.
Go into it with an attitude of "This is gonna be great!" and you will find it will be. Enjoy!
Kathi
Most SAs are fairly neutral and don's show much reaction. They will help you and ring up your sale with little fuss or muss. A few SAs are super sweet and go over and beyond the call to help. These people usually result in my buying more than I planned since I try to reward freindly helpful service.
Finally a small minority will make little comments under their breath or you will spot them whispering to another associate. Most common from these types is just a look of disapproval.
I was shopping at a steinmart near my place here in Atlanta once. Two clerks at the registers were looking over at me and whispering. Dammit! I hate getting busted and my illusions of passing going up in flames. Anyway I thought were being catty and I was picking up a snarky vibe.
I threw 'em off guard. Turned and marched right up to the register, put my purchases on the counter and had a smirky bitchy look on my face all but challedging them to mess with me. They got embarrashed and lowered their eyes. The crazy tgirl backed 'em down.
Never had an issue enfemme.... most are friendly and curtious.... more of a reaction or that "look" when shopping in drab.... like I care!!!
I have had very good experiences with SA's when shopping enfemme, they seem to go out of their way to make me feel welcome, and are very helpful. It is a wonderful experience when SA's call you by name and welcome you when you walk back into the store when dressed enfemme.
Most of them dont really give a dang and besides,your money is good as a GGs. Dont think about it too much and just do it!
Merry
HRT since 2009
All the SA's Ive met have been courteous to me. I have only had one refer to me as sir, and I think she was nervous, as she said was new on the job. I was probably her first tranny customer(and I do tend to be more intimidating than a barrel of ferrets). As said most of them are probably happy to be in business and make a sale. A few have engaged in small talk, but all have been professional. Except for the male SA who rolled his eyes when I said "Im not sure which boots I want but I will know them when I see them", I swear he whispered "women" as he walked away.
SA'a are in that special class along with therapists and prostitutes, they are paid to like you and accept you, or at least pretend to.
How they treat you is a reflection of their own professionalism, not anything to do with you. I wouldn't worry about it too much, but it might be fun to see how far you can push one.
And so we go, on with our lives...
We know the Truth, but prefer Lies.
Lies are simple, simple is Bliss.
Why go against tradition, when we can admit defeat,
Live in Decline, be the victim of our own design?
I think most SAs want to make a sale. Some of them might seem uncomfortable, but some of them are really great. Ultimately, they just want you to spend your money. Most women know that if they treat us really well, then we will come back and shop with them in the future. That's been my experience.
Folks is folks. Some are going to be more tolerant than others and some are going to be more reasonable than others. Like has been said, the money is the common denominator with all customers and that seems to the avenue we have to take.
[SIZE="3"]Brandi[/SIZE]
Love life and find happiness where you can.
I had a interesting experence when returning something at Boscovs last week .
The SA ,who had waited on me many times in the past ,ask me for my ID .
Well I almost went into panic mode .
I told her that it was in the car and she said that since I was a regular customer she would let it go .
I felt bad about lying to her and when back in and in my male voice told her why I could not show her the ID .
She of course already knew and we had a nice talk .
Overall a great experence .,
Oh wow only a few time.....well they must have lasted a few month each EH. Other wise you would never have soooooooooo mennnnnnnyyyyyyy great shopping stories. Witch I love and need now gimme gimme gimme more now hun. Well I guess you need to go shopping some more to tell us how it happened when.......Originally Posted by Kathi Lake
Ya I know the feeling. I have had the same rock star treatment and love it. Those shops I go back to time and time again. I tell the boss that , That is the reason I come back and they love to hear that there staff if the reason you come back....well other then my being a shop-alcoholic like you Kathi but I just don't write as good of stories as you do!!!
Never played with a barrel of ferrets....Gold fish yes , the prob with fish is they just can fetch well. There all like I can't breath I can't breath.
Oh yes I find they love to play dress up and want to see what a CD would look like in a very girly dress or skirt more so then other women . We are like life size Barbie Dolls to some of them.....and I am more then fine with that. It's almost like in there minds it like there dressing up Ken in Barbie's clothes lol. I don't think most of the girls here mind that eh.
Go into it with an attitude of "This is gonna be great!" and you will find it will be. Enjoy!
Go into it with an attitude of "This is gonna be great!" and you will find it will be. Enjoy!
Go into it with an attitude of "This is gonna be great!" and you will find it will be. Enjoy!
I quote this 3 time cuz That is a great statement and very true. Attitude is key if you walk into a story thinking your a pervert you can be treated like one. Walk in there like it's something you do all the time and it's normal (and it is for some of us who shop lots) and they will treat you great.
I only had one SA at future shop when he needed help finding something , he called another SA and he said " we are looking for a TV with a DVD player built in and he...err She says....... I was a little saddened by that but it was a few month later that I got to the point where I did not care if I passed and now if someone does that I correct them and not care. I just want them to "CALL" me by then Gender I am presenting and that's all. Respect. The SA that made the mistake did correct himself and looked a little embarrassed (I said nothing ) and I if I could have then would have thanked him for being courteous enough to correct what he said.
Aside form that I have had nothing but the best time and all whom I have talked to have been almost overly friendly and soooo nice to me. I Love this job... Oh ya it's not a job I am just being ME!!!!
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC].....................100% Authentic Canadian Cross-dressing Truckdriver!!!!!!!!!
Link to My 20th high school reunion http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...d.php?t=112976
If you don't like my (honesty) well TFB.
Men are just a single celled orgasm , In a petri dish held by a woman. (Gene Simmons)
i have only ever had really postive interactions with shop assistants, even the guy ones.....i did have a woman who served me in a clothes store, write her name and phone number down and say 'call me for a coffee one day'.....i've had others compliment me on my 'fashion sense' and most try to make small talk...i guess i give them dinner conversation(laughs)
Censorship reflects society's lack of confidence in itself. It is a hallmark of an authoritarian regime. ~Potter Stewart
I've always been treated properly and even had a few SA's give me all thier attention when there were other customers there. You might get a couple of strange looks by a few but for the most part a completely rewarding expierence.
Put a little lipstick on you'll feel better
I've been shopping in female presentation many times, and I have had only one negative response from an SA. This was an older woman, and honestly I think that she was just sour on life.
Other than her, I have had many wonderful experiences.
warmly, Linnea
I have been out shopping enfemme many times and only had a few times where I got scornful looks from store personal. I really enjoy Victoria secret, they are the best and will get you anything you want to try on. I buy all my bras there and just love the TLC you get from the girls. I go to one that has a CD and "she" is wonderful whenever she is working when I go there. I also Like Dress Barn but the Sa's are a little pushy at times. And whatever you do don't get me started on shoe stores, they are the best of times.
I have been shopping numerous times en femme and heve found most SAs to be neutral. On one shopping trip to TJ Maxx I was taking several bras and girdles into the fitting room along with skirt and two tops. The SA told me that she thought there was a store policy against trying on panties (refering to the girdles). She did some checking and said that it was ok to try on panties and unlocked the door for me. When I came back out she asked me if everything fit, I gave her a smile and a big thumbsup. She smiled back and said "have a great day maam".
I have also gotten help from SAs at Penney's, Kohl's, Target and Wal Mart. Even when shopping for women's clothes in drab, the SAs were very courtious and helpful.
Luv andJill
Straight, into Fantasy Land
With business the way it is right now, no SA is going to drive away a customer!
The vast amount of time SA's have treated me just like any other customer-reciting the week's sales pitch, asked if I needed help, found items I needed, etc. They are trying to do their job, make sales and keep the store up. If you're doing your part-buying stuff-it's all good
Some SA's have gone out of their way to help-offering to get me a dressing room, helping me find accessories that work with an outfit, making suggestions, etc. They've also treated me like just another girl, even been a bit curious. When I go to Torrid, for example, I impress the SA's because my Divastyle card is one of the early ones. Lane Bryant's SA's are a bit cooler. Ashley Stewart, which has more of an African-American clientele and I'm usually the only white girl in the place, has SA's who have told me about upcoming sales and encouraged me to come back.
A very few SA's have done the stare and giggle thing. I usually just smile and wink at them, which totally has them off-balance and they'll shut up and do their jobs. I've never had an SA be outright rude; a couple have gotten pronouns wrong but caught it quickly.
My attitude is, I'm spending money and if you want to piss me off enough to walk out, I'll do it. Treat me like a good customer and I'll be back again.
Countess in exile
Keep Calm and Dance to Morrissey
Z and the Universe
I'm also on Twitter and Facebook
I've had no real problems during hundreds and hundreds of shopping excursions. But one important point: if you act nervous (and probably we all do, the first few times) then the SA will pick up on that and will be scared, maybe thinking you are planning to rob her or worse. So just be calm.
Also it helps to look as feminine as possible. If you look like a guy in a dress, don't be surprised if you're treated like one. Wear makeup, please! Even if the workers know you are a crossdresser, in my experience they tend to accept you as a girl (or at least not as a real man) if it's clear that you know the ways of a woman.
Having worked in retail, I can assure you that never have I seen a crossdresser merit more that a brief comment by one of my coworkers. And even that is rare. Bottom line, most people have their own lives to live and don't much care about ours.
Cindi Johnson
Now just a minute, playing with a barrel full of ferrets is tons of fun!
Speaking as a sales assistant, making money is obviously the store's objective, but I work hourly, not on commission and I have this annoying thing called morals. That means I will help you but I won't lie to you or pretend to like you to make a sale. Contact with nice people is the most rewarding part of my job. The unusual ones are more fun than a barrel full of ferrets.Any SA who doesn't like people shouldn't be in that line of work.
OMG that's hilarious!
Christina's not wrong, ladies.
Last edited by Andy66; 01-23-2010 at 06:06 PM.
Same here. And never had an issue when shopping in boy-mode either.
"I was shopping at a steinmart near my place here in Atlanta once..."
But how often do you shop for a stein?
[SIZE="3"]Gender is a state of mind[/SIZE]
LGBTQ PRIDE
As of Oct. 5th, go here to see my pics:http://www.flickr.com/people/fab_karen/
A Yankee Doodle T-Girl
proud of my President
I think it depends a lot on who you are, and how you conduct yourself.
When I was a SA in high school at a Leggs Hanes Bali outlet store Hw years ago, a dressed CD would occasionally come in (In truth, I am sure there were many more we didn't notice). And they invariably fell into either one of two camps - they were either there to conduct the same business that every other girl was, OR they were uber creepy, and relatively obviously just getting their jollies. Members of the first category were treated just like any other girl, and members of the latter category were not.
Now, of course, there are always jerks. There are those who will treat you poorly even if you are not being creepy. But that is true no matter how you are dressed.
"I don't mind living in a man's world, as long as I can be a woman in it." — Marilyn Monroe
Not too often! LOL Matter of fact I probably have two or three tacky steins in my kitchen cabinet left over from trips and such.Same here. And never had an issue when shopping in boy-mode either.
"I was shopping at a steinmart near my place here in Atlanta once..."
But how often do you shop for a stein?
Hope - Interesting observation about two camps of CDs that go shopping. The girls there to do their thing shopping and the Creeps! That cracked me up...but its gotta be true.
I think it depends on how well you make yourself passable.
I mean, if you half-ass it I think you definitely are going to get some odd looks, maybe even ridiculed.
However, if you show pride in your looks, they'll be more then happy to help :]
