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Thread: Came out to my wife tonight.

  1. #1
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    Hi everyone, longtime(lifetime crossdresser) here. Finally came out to my wife tonight. She said she had suspected for many years. Anyways, I came out dressed in front of her and she hardly batted an eye. Said hmmm oh ya thats cute. r yu serious? lol then after i told her i was serious she said i really need a new wig and definitely some new clothes. Totally blew me away with her response. I can hardly wait to go shopping with her. Life is good.

    Will be getting some new mucho better pics after doing the shopping thing. lol
    Last edited by Holly; 01-15-2010 at 09:15 PM. Reason: Merged two consecutive posts... please use the EDIT button to add content. Multiposting is not permitted.

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member Karen__Starr's Avatar
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    That is great to hear your wife is understanding and that she will be taking you shopping. I am happy for you
    SRS January 27

  3. #3
    Gold Member sherri52's Avatar
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    Way to go Jackie. Don't you wish you did that a couple of years ago
    Put a little lipstick on you'll feel better

  4. #4
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    Aww congrats!

    I'm so happy for you! I bet you wish you told her a long time ago! It sounds like you have a lot of good times to come! Enjoy that shopping trip!

    Maddie

  5. #5
    Member Dee2U's Avatar
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    Wow...sounds like a dream come true to me. How did you get up the courage? What encouraged you? I am afraid and frozen. I dont even know you but am SOO proud for you...Dee

  6. #6
    left site permanently aggi123's Avatar
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    Wow that's awesome! I'm really jealous right now.
    removed

  7. #7
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    Jackie, you must feel such a relief. Hiding it from a partner, especially as long as you have, can really build up the anxiety .. and the guilt. It's wonderful that she seems to be so understanding.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  8. #8
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    Congratulations but please continue to take it slow. Although everything seems wonderful, she may not be ready for a ride that goes more quickly than she anticipated. I am sincerely happy for anyone who gets any kind of acceptance but there are so many of us on the forum who have had to pull in the reins and slow down. Good luck!

  9. #9
    Worlds Prettiest Dad!!! Jocelyn Quivers's Avatar
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    Congragulations, I'm glad she was supportive. Kiss your checking account goodbye.
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  10. #10
    Aspiring Member VanessaVW's Avatar
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    That is great news! You certainly have a great wife. Definately a keeper!!!! You should treat her to a nice dinner for being supportive. (Maybe after your shopping experience.)

  11. #11
    Swans have more fun! sandra-leigh's Avatar
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    Sounds positive!

    I note you've been registered for a few years now, so you probably have already read the warnings about the Pink Fog.

    As you are in "Winnipeg almost", you might be interested in looking into the Winnipeg social group, Masquerade. We meet on the second Tuesday of every month downtown, and there are related events throughout the year. The January meeting was this week; the February meeting will be our annual election; our annual dinner will be in early March. Wives are welcome.

  12. #12
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    very cool!!! I'm happy for you and admire her. there may be some bumps down the road, but what a great start!

  13. #13
    Lexie lou nylon boy's Avatar
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    AAAwwwe im sooo envious!I have had a nice day dressing up today though so that kinda makes up for it......Just wish i could have a girly night out with my wife so much,Getting ready and dressed up with her would be such a buzz before the night out,you so lucky jackie so embrace your new found freedom!!xx

  14. #14
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    I told my wife years ago and she was fine about it, best thing i did.

  15. #15
    Senior Member Christina Horton's Avatar
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    Question

    Ok we've waited long enough. We need an up date. How did the shopping go. Come on girl give.
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  16. #16
    New Member Gigi0366's Avatar
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    Wow girlfriend that's wonderful! Congratulations!!!
    How did you ever find the courage?

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Annie D View Post
    Congratulations but please continue to take it slow. Although everything seems wonderful, she may not be ready for a ride that goes more quickly than she anticipated. I am sincerely happy for anyone who gets any kind of acceptance but there are so many of us on the forum who have had to pull in the reins and slow down. Good luck!
    Annie said it.

    Years ago, I step by step came out to my wife, she seemed to accept it, even to embrace it; within weeks, we were shopping, I would dress at home, we had all kinds of roleplays and fantasies. it lasted a few months. Hard to remember how things went awry but they gradually went backward until I went underground again. I think I focused too much on what I wanted and neglected her.

    I wish you the best, keep learning.
    Sonia

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by sonia_dargency View Post
    Annie said it.
    ..... gradually went backward until I went underground again. I think I focused too much on what I wanted and neglected her.

    .
    I think that its absolutely critical to avoid becoming self absorbed. Its a risk that we all face in our relationships - somehow we need to keep reminding ourselves to show our affection, appreciation and concern for our SOs...

  19. #19
    Silver Member kristinacd55's Avatar
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    Jackie,
    Lots of great replies, just don't go overboard on that pink fog for sure!

  20. #20
    Kara J
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    Way to go!

    That's great, but it would take a lot of the fun out of it.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by kimdl93 View Post
    I think that its absolutely critical to avoid becoming self absorbed. Its a risk that we all face in our relationships - somehow we need to keep reminding ourselves to show our affection, appreciation and concern for our SOs...
    Totally, I truly believe that in my case at least, CD was not the issue, however disturbing it might be; I was just a selfish idiot who just neglected to be sentimental and appreciative.

    I think that CDs whom SO is truly accepting are in fact catering to their SO's needs, consciously or not; I wish Jackie to be one of them for his and his wife's happiness.
    Sonia

  22. #22
    Aspiring Member gabimartini's Avatar
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    Congrats, Jackie! Good for you guys!!!

  23. #23
    Aspiring Member Jaclyn NM's Avatar
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    All I can say, is take it slow and easy. I didn't, and now I'm back dressing in the closet. My wife still knows I dress, but doesn't want to see it or discuss it. She was very supportive at first, but that changed and I don't know why. So, as I said, take it slow and easy, and communicate regularly.

  24. #24
    GG, and proud to be SO Cutedot's Avatar
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    Don't mean to rain on your parade...

    Jackie,

    Your wife's reaction is great, and bodes well for both of you. But be careful and take it slow. Don't take it as a tacit permission to go into a major pink fog. When my BF told me about his CDing, I was very non-chalant over it. I even met "her" (Hi, Gabi!) a couple of weeks later. However, until I got a good EMOTIONAL grasp on the magnitude of the situation, it did affect me. I tried to approach it from a purely intellectual point of view, and it REALLY didn't work.

    Your wife needs time, a lot of patience, tons of talking and, especially, cuddling. She's accepting of the outward appearance, now she has to go through the process of dealing with the unique characteristics of the CDer's psyche... After all, we know there is more to it than just putting on the clothes, right? Give her time, give her credit. If she's willing, then she'll get there.

    Best of luck to both of you.

    Dot
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  25. #25
    Jamie Jamz1b's Avatar
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    AW! So SO SO SO LUCKY! How do you think she had already had a feeling?

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