Are there any GG's that find cross-dressing as a turn on? My wife puts up with it but does not really like it. I was hoping to find someway to make it more fun for her.
Are there any GG's that find cross-dressing as a turn on? My wife puts up with it but does not really like it. I was hoping to find someway to make it more fun for her.
Caroline:be:
Yes, there are GGs that find a crossdressed man to be a turn on. I suspect they are the exception and not the norm.
My initial thought is there is little you are going to be able to do to change your wife's mind (i.e., make it a turn on for her) since she does not like the idea of you crossdressing. She would have to get past that hurdle first which is a big one. Then she would have to get past any sexual hangups in that area. That is asking a lot of any person. You might be able to find other activities you can both enjoy such as shopping, makeup or just being girlfriends. Sorry to be negative, but I doubt she is ever going to find your crossdressing as a turn on.
Last edited by Melissa Rose; 02-12-2010 at 12:40 PM.
To simply make it more fun for her?Originally Posted by carolinetv
Or to find a way to turn crossdressing into something that turns her on?
To answer your first question, which I'm not sure whether it's related to the rest of your post or not.. Yes, some GGs do.
[SIZE=3]~Moe ~ [/SIZE]
As Melissa noted above, some women certainly do find Cross dressers a turn on...and good for them. I suspect a larger number of women can enjoy a cross dressing partner in non-sexual ways...like having a girlfriend to shop, have lunch or just talk girl talk.
I wouldn't push the sexual thing. Instead, like the girls above suggest - try to find things she enjoys and see if these can integrate with your cross dressing. Empathy is the key - make it about her...not about you and cross dressing.
I echo what Kitty has already said, however, I'll share this top secret information with you. Now, don't tell anyone, but their is only room for one lady of the house and your wife already knows who that is. Just remember to put her first in everything and you will reap the rewards. You might need to dig deep to find her desires, but show her they come first.
If flowers show up at her work or home that is a big help to show her she is first in your life. The more she likes/loves you the cding comes with you.
The thing is... and it really is just that... how and when did she find out? Most likely she can't get past the feeling of betrayal and/or having been lied to in a pretty major way. Anything, therefore, to do with your dressing up reminds her she's been lied to.
The most important thing is to gain acceptance. Putting up with is not really a situation you want to prolong. Getting turned on might be too much to ask.
I would revisit with her the reasons you "have" to do this and why it's a part of your being and try to explain why (if that's the case) you had to keep this from her.
This might get you to the point of acceptance. Anything after that... well, that's just winning the lottery!!!
Look at it from the other side...
If your wife decided to be a FtM crossdresser would you be interested in her sexually while she dressed up as "Dan" or "Fred?" I'm sure I wouldn't be if it was my wife.
Mina Lost aka Lynda
I do not think that my wife finds it a turn on but she also does not find it a turn off if that is any help .
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Joanne
There are many ways to be "turned on". If you mean this in an amorous sense, that depends upon her persuasion. My wife is completely a part of my dressing, but she is completely heterosexual. Tina and she are close, platonic, girlfriends. It would be crazy for Tina to attempt to change this, and she won't, ever. My wife enjoys Tina and why would I attempt to rock that boat???
tina
Yes, but so much depends on the circumstances and how it is presented. Is it a fun time together? Is it a first time for either or both? How well do you know each other and what is the relationship? Is the crossdresser herself turned on? So many variables to answer this question.
In your particular situation, it seems your wife is not quite ready to be turned on and has issues to deal with, not necessarily with you but with herself. "Turned on" generally has sexual conotations. I assume she is heterosexual and I doubt she is going to see you as women that lights her up and excites her or turns her on. I suggest for starters that you don't take your dressing too seriously and make it more of a fun thing. Get "turned on" yourself first.
"It takes a real man to dress as a woman."
Yes i do, but i do not like the trashy look which i have seen too much of here. We go out together and no one knows the difference-V.
My wife does because we make it fun for both of us.
Hugs,
Teddie
I don't find cross dressing a turn on, but my partner does turn me on ........... Dressing is an extension of who he/she is, and he/she is fun
I allow myself to set healthy boundaries ..... to say no to what does not align with my values, to say yes to what does.
Boundaries assist me to remain healthy, honest and living a life that is true to me
I'm not sure what to tell you, as far as what to do to make it more fun. But I can tell for sure "YES" there are gg's that get turned on by crossdressing! I'm very happy to be the husband/wife to one!
I love Jesus!
Life is so much better now that I know who I am !
To answer the OP's question my wife does. And it has lead to a totally fulfilling never stale 'fantasy' life. (I'm trying not to be overly suggestive here)
Well -- my wife wears jockstraps and men's briefs as a part of our 'fun' and while it certainly isn't full CDing, we both find it to be an incredible turn on.
Huggles
Toni-Lynn
--I'm TN (transnationalist) - a Canadian born in an American's body! I stand on guard for thee!
There are a couple here on this forum. So the answer is yes. But don't count on there being too many.
Put a little lipstick on you'll feel better
There are women who do get something from it. My wife is one of them and I have often asked why and she has yet to provide a convincing answer. I put her on a pedestal when dressed and fooling around. I make sure it is all about her and not me.
Start small ans keep it simple. Hopefully over time she will become more comfortable with your female side and will explore new areas.
This is a very good point, and I'm guessing most MTFs would be turned off by an FTM. I used to feel that way, but after a lot of exposure to mannish lesbians in the clubs, I can honestly say I could get into it. My own personal preference might be for a blended persona, but I could also be attracted to a full-blown ftm. I would love her/him playing the dominant role in general as well as a masculine approach in the bedroom.
My wife likes it. But I'm an odd case. I never ever talked to her about me as a crossdresser nor did I mention my experiences before meeting her.
I started wearing her stuff, with her permission. Sometimes without it, I just kept them warm for her while she took a shower and stuff like that. And it was during our first time living together, so practically anything ended up in sex.
Eventually, I started buying my own stuff and wearing regularly without making it an introduction to sex.
She never asked, I never told.
But, she is a clear case of a GG being turned on by a CDing partner.
They are out there but they are rare. My recently departed wife was very into it in all ways. She dated CD's before she met me and loved goiing out and meeting other CD friends. I think the difference was that I met her as Joanne first. Most women meet your male side first and fall in love and enjoy that side. Then they meet your girl side and that can be a lot to get used to.
In answer to your first question, yes there are women who enjoy the CDing. To what degree they get turned on in bed very much depends on the quality of their relationships with their SO ... the love, trust, openness, emotional intimacy, etc.
If you mean fun as in being turned on sexually while you are dressed, then if your wife is open-minded and your relationship is good, the biggest turn on ever is if she feels in her deepest core that she is the one turning you on. If she feels that you are turned on just by virtue of being dressed (if you do not get turned on otherwise), then your wife she might feel as if she is a mere accessory. But if she is turned-off by the prospect of having sex with you dressed, it is not likely this will change any time soon. It takes lots of time and open communication.
If you mean having fun with less intimate activities, then you could ask her what she would like to do when you are dressed, or you could do the same things dressed that you both enjoy in guy mode? What sort of things to you do together now?
Reine
Just a great point.
True
Friendship
“A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway”
Fr. Jerome Cummings
Some might think that the cd is prettier then herself,be it true or not.
The thing I love most about this board is that you get the most intelligent answers to a question. Before I go on I should tell you all that I am suffering from Lyme for the last 4 years. besides all the pain I lose my eyesight, hearing and taste from time to time. I also have lost the ability to read, write or remember things. This also comes and goes. Some days are better than others but most of the time it sucks. After reading the responses I now realize that my problem maybe something different. We did try having her dressed as a man an me a women and had a lot of fun.I remember when she bought me my first pair of thongs and she told me she was wet just thinking about me wearing them. When she went to bed with me dressed I would ask her not to play with me, that it would be all about her ( she was not crazy about that). I am sure that the issue is that she is not into sex anymore. Even if she was I can not deliver because of all the medications. We have not had sex in 18 months. The problem is complex for more reasons than I can remember or write about. Before some suggest Viagra, I can tell you it does not fully work in my case.
I want to thank you all for helping me remember the good times and maybe help me formulate and answer.
Does anyone have Lyme and needs help, let me know. It took 3 1/2 years, two hospital stays and over 40 doctors before I got a correct diagnosis.
love,
Caroline
Last edited by Daintre; 02-19-2010 at 01:42 AM. Reason: Posting about illegal drugs is not allowed on this board
Caroline:be:
I have a friend nearby who is very upfront about liking crossdressers. As a young girl she was sexually abused and I believe that as an adult she prefers feminine/ non-threatening men. Other women I have met who are attracted to transgender girls seem to have a similar story in their past.
Warmly,
Sheren Kelly
Posting Permissions
