Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 26 to 46 of 46

Thread: the urge: mood based? seasonal? moons aligning? hormones?

  1. #26
    Making a life for Tina! suchacutie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    4,235

    without a doubt

    my negative trigger is stress and the need for either getting something important finished or dealing with whatever is generating the stress. I just cannot transform to Tina and have her solve my male-life problems...it's not fair! I must admit that Tina is very fastidious, so that's the one advantage I take of her...if I have some detailed stuff to be done and I can't focus, Tina solves that problem. She can focus and get that very detailed stuff done, and done well! Sometimes I think she's more creative than my male side!

    But, when times are happy and my wife and I are well connected, Tina is just the natural result, and often my wife will sense it and ask if Tina can visit.

    So, happy, secure, confident = Tina time
    Need for detailed focussed work= Tina time
    Stress and crisis=Tina stays in the background watching.

    At least I've learned something about Tina in these last 5 years!

    tina

  2. #27
    Aspiring Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    California
    Posts
    876

    hormone cycle

    Men also have a hormone cycle ( called Circadian rhythm), and about 8 a.m. their testoterone level is as its peak, and in the evening about 8 p.m. it is at the lowest concentration. Also, the older you get, the less T you put out , so it could be that the older the more frequently you want to dress, at most any time after 8 a.m. If you are putting out some estrogen, then that might be giving uyou a push as well. If your doctor recommended saw palmetto for prostate problems that will lower more (side effects are nil except for the occasional guy who develops moobs reported as far back as 1898).
    At some point in later years, (some) men also have the equivalent of menopause called andropause. Not all men have it. That may even cause more interest in dressing.
    Mandrake out of water

  3. #28
    Natalie Moore Natalie_393's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Albany, NY
    Posts
    122
    It's tough to put my finger on what makes me want to dress because it comes in waves with me as well somedays I can't stop thinking about doing nothing but dressing, perhaps crossdressing is triggered by things in everyday life (emotions,career,famliy) it's just all thoery I hope oneday for all of us we find out answers

  4. #29
    Senior Member Carly D.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    1,029
    I'm the same way, I haven't hardly dressed at all this past nearly full year and while I miss it..I can't seem to force myself to dress and enjoy it.. I did force myself to dress up last week but didn't like the way I felt.. (WTF) I mean I love (d) to dress up but now it's like no.. Nothing feels right..
    This is what I mean by "every guy can look like a girl from the right angles".. this is one of the first pictures of me dressed up.. very vague look.. almost fem...

  5. #30
    Love Lipstick & Heels AllThingsPretty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    On An Island
    Posts
    260
    I go through the same things most of the posters here have stated, I dress more when my sex drive is increased, when I am in great spirits and when spring time arrives. But come winter time and my work load increases I tend to go without the urge to dress. or I have the urge and I am just so not in the mood.

    Thank god its spring time

  6. #31
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Orange County, Calif.
    Posts
    24,896

    Probably tru for me, too!

    Quote Originally Posted by Melinda G View Post
    For most of us, crossdressing is sexually driven, and your sex drive is related to your emotional state. If you're bored, worried about something, depressed, even by the weather, your sex drive goes down in a hurry. It always fluctuates, and is rarely just level for any length of time. It can also be seasonal. With spring here, I would look for a rebound!
    Except the "seasonal" part!
    In SoCal, we just went straight from Winter, to peak Summer, in one week!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  7. #32
    Aspiring Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    951
    I tend to want to dress on days that end in a '-y'. However I can suppress it for a bit to give my wife some breathing room, but I really can't go more than a few weeks without.

  8. #33
    am here Hali's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Africa
    Posts
    367

    The trigger

    The urge just comes a goes i cant keep track of the urge-swings, but i know one thing for sure..........the more i dont dress (suppress the urge) the more i feel that am not a CD but a woman (may be TS and that i cant stand being a man) but ones i dress periodically the urge reduces and makes me feel like a happy CD, hope wat i said makes sense.

  9. #34
    Member Rachel2000's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    128
    I can tell you what triggered it for me this past week. TAXES. Yep, just completed my income tax return only to find out I owe almost $9,000 in addition to the $37,000 I paid during 2009.

    I really need to move to another country where you aren't taxed poor because far too many social programs. Ok, I admit some of this was my fault because I sold off too much stock, but it was headed for a free fall and I didn't want to lose any more than I already had. Live & learn.

  10. #35
    New Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    21
    Quote Originally Posted by busker View Post
    Also, the older you get, the less T you put out , so it could be that the older the more frequently you want to dress, At some point in later years, (some) men also have the equivalent of menopause called andropause. Not all men have it. That may even cause more interest in dressing.
    I've wondered about this...I'm 53 and I've noticed the urge becoming more frequent and intense almost year on year for the past five years or so. It's got to the point where if the urge is on me and I can't dress for whatever reason I find I can't stop thinking about it. It's far more obsessive than in my younger days.

  11. #36
    Patricia
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    87
    I always have the urge in a strong way. When I am in drab and see a GG wearing something nice the urge gets particularly strong. I feel more comfortable en femme and more relaxed. I also think I look a lot better. I hate boy's clothing, feel horrible and unnatural in them and think I look like a dork. En femme, I often get approving nglances from the people around me, never in drab. That's why I go out en femme whenever I can.
    Patricia, the hard core CD

  12. #37
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    1,080
    Just working through the processes, working through transition.. I can say that my wantingness to 'feel pretty' and dress pretty varies as the environment around me varies, combined with my mood of the day. For example, jeans and tshirtwear is an average look for me, but 'stepping it up' to actually add colors to the foundation or trying to dress up for an occasion has to be something that I /WANT/ to do. I might relate it to any other moment in perhaps a man's or woman's life... some people like to dress up all the time, be fancy, etc. Other women I know get the whole 'Well, why would I want to go and shave my legs for THAT??!' kind of attitude. Figuring, to some people, that it takes a significant effort to get 'dressed up' as opposed to casually presenting, I might present the reality that 'I just don't feel like getting dressed up tonight' for one reason or another.

    If I'm just dressing for myself and planning on flipping through my wardrobe to play musical outfits in front of the camera, the intention might be for outfit testing and planning.. hence getting dressed up would be fun IF I was looking forward to building outfits for later use. Presenting as a woman around the house, realistically, just means that I feel like 'me' and as long as NO male clothing is to be found anywhere on me, I'm good. If I had the urge to test out new makeup options, etc., would also be a good reason.. otherwise, I just want to make my skin look clear and presentable.

    If I'm going out.. it's my time to have a good time AS MYSELF, and so, I would generally dress to match the location. Goth, business casual, theme, club wear, etc.. and yes, jeans, boots, and a nice Tshirt count for club wear. However, if I don't have the energy to dress for the occasion, I have to face the fact, I am a woman, and if I want to go out on the town, I need to present myself properly. That means looking respectful, tasteful, etc. if it's expected for the venue. If I don't have the energy to 'fix myself up' and look presentable for the evening, then I /don't/ have the energy to go out.. Of course, with all of this comes happiness. If I'm not happy and/or excited about looking good for an event, then when I get there, I may not even have a good time, because I have to face the fact, if I don't feel I look good enough or put together enough, then I'll feel out of place, which will ruin my mood further, and so on.

    This, for me, might lead to depression at times. If I look at my closet, and stew over trying to pick something out to wear for the night, and feel like I need to give up because I can't find something that will make me happy.. I won't want to get dressed 'up', and I'll just mope about. We know that one can't stay in a depressed mood for too long before it kinda becomes overwhelming or overshadowing. I just try and find stuff to help break me out of the funk as quickly as possible, even of that means throwing on those jeans and going out to the book store.... Which means, yeah, the foundation comes out, maybe a little mascara, and a light lip gloss and poof!: Muted look, check. Now I can go be myself in the outside world, even if I'm just pumping gas or reading the newspaper in a coffee shop.

    Now.. the second part of your question(s), it's both, but for different reasons each time. When I feel sad, depressed, and ugly.. I might try and FIND a reason to go out and feel pretty about myself.. again.. the simple things, if you live your life by the things that make you happy, then you may find that the things that make you happy work well together. If you see yourself getting dressed up to go out to the movies and spend a little time byyourself, then that works for you! Again, this is just my opinions talking, but if you can find /the/ thing that starts the mood change in a better direction, then the rest should follow suit.

    However, I will say that, at least for me, the FAR WORST moments are when I've been trying to feel, look, BE pretty and attractive, and THEN I have to argue or fight with someone about anything. Having a disagreement with my SO or my son are perfect killers of mood. Almost every time it happens, and it will often have nothing to do with my dressing or presentation at all, but BAM! I'll want nothing more than to slither into a corner, tear off everything that I've donned to make me happy, and just want to cry.... After that, if I can see through the darkness, I will admit to trying to find anything I can to see the brighter sides of the moments around me, until, perhaps with a little less confidence, I can stand again, hold my head as high as comfortably possible, and work towards having a good day again. (summary: Still being pretty and being confident about that beauty gives me strength and happiness to move forward.)

    Hope that ramblyness makes sense. :-)
    Last edited by Angel.Marie76; 03-18-2010 at 01:29 PM.

  13. #38
    Silver Member victoriamwilliams1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Detroit Area
    Posts
    4,134
    If I go without dressing for a long period the trigger is seeing too many nicely dressed women!

    I do try to dedicate at least one 4-8 hour day to dressing.

  14. #39
    Junior Member Heidi_slave's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    39

    Triggers

    What a fabulous post. I often wonder what triggers me so intensely. I too go for long periods without The Urge, then suddenly find it upon me with a vengeance. Let's see...

    Urge Increases:
    * stress
    * women in sexy clothes
    * time alone
    * eBay
    * being teased by other CD's

    Urge decreases:
    * exercise
    * alcohol

  15. #40
    New Member girlygirl02's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    24
    mainly mood but when so wants it i do it and its still very thrilling for me

  16. #41
    Member girlalex's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    US
    Posts
    236
    if im home alone and i don't have any plans for the day i either go on this website, eat, or sleep. I don't watch tv. but if im aware that there is some sort of event coming up, whatever that is; friends, movies, vacation, anything thats out and about with other people makes me wanna dress. in this case all i really want is to get my hair done, apply some make up along with a pair of low rise jeans and a skinny shirt. cding is really not on my mind at the moment though cuz there are no special events coming up so i just don't find any reason to dress.

  17. #42
    New England Angel Ashley Allen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    NH
    Posts
    79
    Nice topic. before I read all the other replies, I want to put my thoughts out here, as I have thought alot about this; however, I am sorry I can not answer this question, it's probably different for each of us, anyway.

    I find that if I have been in a situation where I am emotionally drained, I just don't even like the idea of dressing up. Maybe that's why GGs have sweat pant nights, so I doubt it's any different for CDs/TS/TV. Feeling feminine seems to be a positive only energy... and I tend to think that is why after forcing ourselves to get dolled up, we feel better and go and have a good time, positive energy multiplies itself, like in the phrase a smile is contagious.

    Well at any rate I was able to relate to the feelings you described and wanted to let you know it seems to be perfectly normal for GG/CD/TS/TV, oh I hate labels, I'm just gonna say it like it is from now on, female souls. Keep Smiling

  18. #43
    Member MWCMDarlene's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Left of Cool
    Posts
    123

    Urges to Dress

    My urges to dress are pretty simple. I don't have many opportunities to dress except only when no one is at home. When I wake up in the morning before the rest of the family, I make the coffee. THen I check to see if wife has left one of her bras hanging in the laundry room to dry from being washed. If so, that means I get to wear my own bra and forms until it is about time for her to get up.

    If her bra is not hanging up, then I get to wear my bra and forms when I flip a quarter in the air. Heads I do, tails I don't. (Still hoping for the US Treasurery to start issueing tw0-headed quarters!).

    Regardless if bra is out or not, if I have worn my own panties from the previous day and still have them one when I get up, I get to wear my own bra and forms. So that's how I dictate, pretty much, as to when I get to dress.

  19. #44
    New Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    London
    Posts
    24
    This is something that I've thought about frequently. My desire to cross dress is very cyclical, but the cycles themselves are unpredictable. They can last for weeks, months or even years. When I don't feel the urge I can be faintly repulsed by the whole concept, but when I do it can be all consuming.

    The triggers? Like many others it mostly seems to be linked to stress and depression, a means of escaping responsibility. I think there is a strong connection to the fact that I'm very submissive as a girl, which presumably is just my way of saying; 'there are all the problems. You deal with them and I'll just do as I'm told'. There is a sexual element to it as well of course, and the sight of a pretty girl wearing the kind of clothes that I like to wear may also arouse the desires.

    The main inhibitor, unfortunately, is seeing a CDer in public who just doesn't pass. Good luck to them, and I hugely admire and envy what they are doing, but it also reminds me just how silly I really do look....

    New relationships inhibit my desires initally, but not for long.....

  20. #45
    happy to be her Sarah Doepner's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Utah, north of West Jordan, south of North Salt Lake & west of South Salt Lake
    Posts
    3,832

    It has to be something inside me driving the feeling

    Stress tends to run the desire to dress from my mind. Once that stress situation is gone I'm usually ready to crossdress and relax just a little. It's not uncommon to have several stressors running along at the same time, overlapping and living in my world for days, weeks and even months at a time.

    In situations like that the idea of dressing can bubble up as a possible way to temporarily escape the stress. But was it the stress that brought it on or was there a preexisting need to dress that finally popped up like a spring flower, regardless of the stress. I think it's more the latter. I don't think there is anything external that drives this desire to get my girl on. Anything can trigger it. The forum, a stop in the closet, shopping, the scent of a woman in an elevator, doing the laundry, reading a story, watching tv or doing yardwork are all capable of being a 'trigger' for something I was ready to do but just didn't realize it.

    Maybe I should keep track of the frequency and strength of these feelings and be a scientist once again, but where is the fun in that? Maybe I should dive into the closet right now and see if there is still another combination of skirts and tops that I haven't already tried, you know, just for the hell of it. What's doing it? I wouldn't be surprised if it had something to do with my brain chemistry, hormone driven and capable of being managed but not eliminated.
    Sarah
    Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.

  21. #46
    Junior Member eddiesavage's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    New Zeland
    Posts
    30
    Haveing only come to terms with being a CD,i have questioned why ??
    Some of my triggers are sexual,depression,the need to feel sexy,the feeling of the clothing against my skin.Thats only the start i suspect.As time goes by I am learning more about myself more which in its self raises more questions.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State