the urge: mood based? seasonal? moons aligning? hormones?

[MentalMercury]

I'd have to say my urge to dress up has significantly decreased over the past 1 year or so of my life and it's kind of upsetting. I have to fight myself to start dressing but once I do it feels good and its fun and I don't regret it at all.

I theorized that 'maybe it's not as exciting anymore, you need to dress with someone' but when events roll around where people I know expect to see me dressed (drag ball, anime conventions) it doesn't seem as exciting.

Ok so next theory, holds more water, I've been through some emotionally draining things and feel like I need to be generally more happy for that urge to come back as strong as I'd like.

So my question is, what triggers you to dress? what events in your life do you think make the urge decrease?

[jenifer m.]

as far as dressing girly i do that every day like its breathing,however i have to plan a trip out in full femme i have to get every little detail just right befor hand.so i guess the planning,and anticipation are what gets me into the mood.

[gabimartini]

Liked your thread a lot! I'm always looking for patterns that may help explain the triggers behind my CDing. So far, I haven't been able to find anything really conclusive. It just comes and goes, as it always has. Working out seems to diminish it, going through stressful times seem to increase it. I have a feeling it has some sort of ties to our hormonal levels, but it's hard to prove. Would love to find out more about it!

[amy canada]

What urges me to dress? Well, the flyers and Sears catalogues with all the pretty girls wearing fabulous clothes, plus all those BOGO commercials from Payless. The more money a girl can save, the more clothes and shoes she'll buy!

[NathalieX66]

I read somewhere that the urge to crossdress goes through cycles that last up to six months, and dies down down for a few months.

Guess what? My urge has never diminished at any point in the year. I feel this way all year round.
What does that tell you? For me, it means, I have the desire to express this side of me rather than sexual motivation. It becomes an innate part of me.

[GingerLeigh]

I find that stress makes me want to dress more, and I found that as I get older I want to dress more. Maybe there's a connection. Getting older is stressful... Nah, who knows.
It does seem to come in waves. I can go for long periods without dressing, then all I think about is dressing.

Ginger

[MentalMercury]

These replies are reminding me of past triggers now that I think of it. Other women are triggers sometimes. Being on a college campus, when the weather gets bearable all the skirts come out, and that always nags at the 'I want to feel pretty' part of me.

I've heard numerous times on these forums and confirmed myself that a new relationship makes the urge go down at first, but that's not my situation currently.

I can understand the cycle of coming and going, that makes sense, but it feels like it's taken a more than 6 month divebomb.

So I guess my next question would be then, do you want to dress more when you're all stressed out? or when things are just fine and happy?

For me personally, I find it's more when I'm happy

[Ashley B]

This thread is great, because it's something that I have thought about a ton. I'm not really sure what brings the urge on for me, or what makes it go away again when it leaves. I know the new relationship thing has been a cause for the dissipation in the past, but I've had so few of those that it could have just been a coincidence. If I had to make a guess, I would say that the more social interaction I have going on in my life, the lower my urge to dress is. However, I currently have as much of that in my life as I ever have, and I just went through as long a period of strong urges as I ever have. The urge declined within days of hearing good news about graduate school, so it's possible that I dress when I'm feeling anxious or negative in some way. But then I can remember times when things were going very well for me and suddenly all I wanted was to dress up.

As far as specific triggers, I also get that "I want to feel pretty" feeling when spring rolls around and the skirts start appearing. It can also be something as simple as seeing the women's clothing section of a department store while I'm walking through the mall. What I've noticed about myself is that although I will go through long periods of not wanting to dress (6 months is not too uncommon for me), I still have something there tugging at the back of my mind. While at school, it was well known to my friends that every once in a while I liked to go off to the mall alone, intentionally not telling anyone so that I could be there by myself. They all just assumed I liked to have time alone, but usually I did this so I could spend time looking at the women's clothing without anyone asking questions. It's kind of a paradox, but I'll find myself looking at women's clothing and wishing I could wear it while at the same time not wanting to wear it.

At this point in my life, I couldn't really pin down a trigger for the urges coming, but I think what causes them to disappear for me is a guilty feeling. I'm not saying it's rational, but for whatever reason when good things happen to me (like a new girlfriend or grad school acceptance), I think I get a kind of guilty feeling telling me that what I've been doing is inappropriate. Then I think the urge eventually comes back because it's an irrepressible part of my personality.

Hm, I didn't mean to ramble, but this is a thought provoking topic that I am very interested in.

[Celeste]

wow,my trigger is most certainly a mood swing within the week.I get to a point where i snap,and then i know two days later,i'll be dressed.I need those two days to plan and appropriate.

The other end of the spectrum would be life realities bills,kid,alimony.taxes and people who say they want to meet and then chicken out at the last minute.

you just cant be knocked down by others in this life.

[Imogen_Mann]

What triggers me... Difficult to say. I think a better question in my case is what stops me ? Every day I'd love to dress properly when I get out of bed but my day starts off in the mans world... So I can't, and then later in the day If I feel very tired when I get home, or have aches and pains... I'd rather go to bed. If I have my daughter home for the weekend, that prevents dressing too.

If there are any triggers for dressing... Times when I feel I REALLY need the right clothes on, then it's when work get's too stressful and I feel unhappy, or when I feel let down, deflated by things (like my mother not even bothering to get me a card on my 40th birthday for instance). Sadness therefore is my catalyst.

[eluuzion]

Stress, anxiety and depression are common triggers. Frustration is another strong trigger for impulsive behavior. Many times it serves as the oasis to retreat to calm the spirit and rejuvenate the spirits.

My triggers? Well, big desire upon waking...similar to the common desire for a.m. sex. Stress release for sure. Any return from an intense business or social event trips the strong impulse immediately after returning home.

But I live alone and I'm self-employed, so I dress most of the time when not in public anyway.

[thenewgirl]

I would have to say my urge is partly mood and usually occurs more then one time a day.

[DAVIDA]

I guess that I am a little different than most. Big surprise!
I don't have an "urge", it just "is".
I am dressed all the time that I am home.

[erickka]

This may seem strange to some of you, but then again, maybe not. What seems to trigger me into the tailspin of the pink fog is more stress than normal. When all is going a little more smoothly, my desire wains to a point. Since the economy took a dump, I almost lost my home to foreclosure, had to file chapter 7, amongst other things, I find much comfort and relief in getting all girlied up.I don't know if it is the feeling of "escaping" my manly side or just that is a stress relief valve. All that I know is that my dressing has somehow kept me from going off the deep end for the last year and a half. I guess it has been sort of a blessing in "disguise". Anyone who can help shed some light on this one would be much appreciated!

Hugs to all, Erickka

[Paula Siemen]

Breathing

[kimdl93]

I don't know that I have a trigger. I dress pretty much 24/7 at home - exceptions being family stuff, work away from home. So, its not a mood that strikes me, its the way I live.

[NicoleYork]

I too feel like I'm in a bit of a rut at the moment. I just don't feel like I can be bothered to dress anymore and it seems like a bit of a chore.

But sometimes, when I've gone to all the "trouble", it seems worth it and I feel "back to normal" again.

But with a baby now part of the family, chances are I'll come out of my rut when it's not appropriate to dress in front of her.

[StaceyJane]

What gives me the urge to dress?

Waking up in the morning.

Although sometimes I have dreams that make me want to dress too.

[Charleen]

I'm dresse most of the time as this is who I am. The question for me is what stops me? Unlike most, when I get really depressed I revert to full boy mode. Go figure!

[sherri52]

I dress everyday less some of the makeup. When I go out the thrill sets me in motion to dress to the nines. I don't claim to pass but I'm comfortable when I go out and don't care if I get people staring

[Frédérique]

So my question is, what triggers you to dress? what events in your life do you think make the urge decrease?

[SIZE="2"]The desire to feel good triggers me to dress. As such, I cannot dress when I’m depressed, anxious, worried about something or simply not feeling well. When I’m feeling OK and the world isn’t bearing down on me, I can dress with impunity and wonder why I ever didn’t dress. I like to get into my little personal space, which is like a magical forest, and completely forget about the fact that I’m wearing my femme clothing. This is not too difficult to achieve, so I do it often…

Events in my life have caused the urge to dress to decline now and then – circumstances of my own making, I must say, and I just went with the flow, putting dressing on the back burner until the situation became more favorable. Right now I’m in a good situation, evidenced by the fact that I’m here, among kindred spirits. At my age I don’t wish to re-enter a situation where dressing would be impossible, so I’ll stay right where I am and enjoy the closet I made for myself…[/SIZE]

[Melinda G]

For most of us, crossdressing is sexually driven, and your sex drive is related to your emotional state. If you're bored, worried about something, depressed, even by the weather, your sex drive goes down in a hurry. It always fluctuates, and is rarely just level for any length of time. It can also be seasonal. With spring here, I would look for a rebound!

[Dawn Andrews]

Hi everyone,
What makes me want to dress is down to the amount of time I have really, and the confidence that I won't be disturbed. Here I am at nearly 3am having not got dressed until 10pm because of a fear factor - daughter lives close by and has started walking the dog around here.
Still once dressed, its a great feeling. If only I could get out of that front door!
Dawn

[DeniseNJ]

I feel more like a girl once September rolls around. I shave more , let my nails grow more, I act more like a sissy and push the limits. I just feel more feminine. I want to be a girl more in the fall and I enjoy it more

[paulap]

My triggers seem to be associated with stress and sexuality. Sometimes, combined, sometimes not. It may be fighting with SO, differences with daughter, or life in general. Sometimes, it can be where I don't feel attractive enough, I must dress to feel good about myself or attractive to my partner. Idk. I love imagining all the time but can't always do it.