Question about your male wardrobes.

[ReineD]

Hi all, my question comes from having read this thread. I understand having no interest in a male presentation if someone is TS, and it is hard to tell exactly how each of the respondents in the thread identify themselves.

But I often wonder why, if a CD identifies alternatively as a guy and as femme, or specifically if s/he does goes back & forth happily and does not begrudgingly appear as a guy because she feels she has to, then why would there be no interest in the male clothes? In the thread, many people seemed proud of the fact they don't have suits or dress shirts. It seems as if this would limit the places that a CD can go to as a guy, where people do dress up a little more such as a nicer restaurant, a benefit, a wedding, or whatever.

Isn't limiting the male wardrobe also limiting the male experiences? Might this be done subconsciously? Again, this question does not apply to those who have no interest in being male.

[Ashley Allen]

I'm not sure I am going to really answer this... myself, except for the fact that I work in an office and have to be dressed professionally, I would be content in jeans and a t shirt.

I found my fasination with checking out womens clothes shopping magazines an oddity, until I started actually purchasing a feminine wardrobe. The oddity was always because I could care less what I wore. In fact my SO has been picking out my wardrobe as long as we have been together.

So window shopping, I have always done, and then when I actually went shopping for my own fem wardrobe, I was bewildered by my own behavior. I enjoyed shopping. After some thought on the subject, I have determined that men simply have boring wardrobe choices. 1 suit looks like the next, with only subtle differences, and shoes are pretty much the same, I do not own a pair of mens shoes that I like, and as such I may as well settle for whatever is on the clearance rack.

Is this because I think I am a feminine soul in a mans body, which I do believe, or is it simply because men DO have boring clothes choices. I don't know.

But I didn't own a suit until after I started dressing, never had a reason to, many men are this way, why own something you will probably wear once. Wardrobe usually isn't too restricting, as men that don't like to "dress up" don't like going where they have to "dress up".

Now I am more aware of how my clothes make me feel, and so even in man mode, I desire to look my best. Except on those sweat pants and t shirt feeling days.

[melissacd]

when I moved out from living with my ex wife and because I work for the most part from home, I decided to throw away all of my male clothes and construct a sorta male look as needed from my female clothes. So yes I even threw out the dress shirts, the male shoes and the suits.

So far, I have been able to get by just fine because there are so few occasions that I require to dress male that my makeshift attempts to construct a male look work. I have been completely shut out from the old social network which was in fact my ex-wife's family and friends and so there is no need to accommodate them. My kids know and have seen me dressed so there is no problem there. I have been separated from my ex for going into my third year and I have yet to meet a dressing challenge that required me to buy male anything which is a great relief to me because I hate male clothes and I see purchasing any as a big waste of resources that could be allocated elsewhere and for better purpose.

So it is possible to not have any male clothes and still get by just fine.

[AllieSF]

I am not one of those who detest, or said softer, dislike, their male clothes. I always wore a suit and tie to work and liked how I looked and enjoyed dressing up as a guy. My non-work clothes included good quality and looking, more classy than trendy, clothes, plus the requisite Levis, shorts, tee and polo shirts. Now that I am semi-retired (kinda) I have regressed to the stereo-typical male habit of wearing the same Levis forever, the same shirt until even I get tired of it. I think that most of this came on because I started crossdressing (3 years ago). So, my focus has been exploring my styles and looks (on a thrift store budget) and having a great time, and I do. When necessary, I still like to get dressed up in guy mode in something stylish, though what I have now is on the verge of being out of style!

To clarify, I am a crossdresser, not wanting to be a woman and I easily go back and forth with some telltale traces (clear coated nails, trimmed eyebrows and shortened and bleached arm and leg hair during the warm months) carrying over from my femme side to my male side. I just enjoy dressing up, looking good, at least in my opinion where it counts the most, and going out to mainstream venues to interact and interface with the real world out there. I also know very few males who do not make some minimal effort to try to look good in male mode. That may be attributed to the type of people who are my friends and acquaintances and what type of places I frequent. Who knows? I do think it matters a lot to those who are really into their femme side and dream, wish and/or truly want to move more and further in that femme direction away from their male side.

[TNRobin]

I have suits and whatnot, and I dress/present myself as a guy most of the time. I like both sides of me, but to be honest, men's clothing is pretty boring.

Think about it. The last suit that I had made the guy that I usually deal with handed me the fabric samples and as you go through them you'll find 200 different shades of gray, or 75 different shades of black. There's really not much variety in suits at all unless you count ties and owning a number of really nice ties is incredibly expensive, and I just don't find it very expressive.

Now when you get to women's clothing you have TONS of variety, different cuts, styles, colors, etc. Much more interesting.

[suzy1]

That’s an interesting question. I love being suzy but I also enjoy the “other bloke” and like to dress in good clothes, smart shirts and trousers. The funny thing is as time goes on I am getting more and more interested in Suzy’s clothes. But that’s because I can now live as suzy whenever I want and have the money splash out a bit.

SUZY

[eileendover]

... But I didn't own a suit until after I started dressing, never had a reason to, many men are this way, why own something you will probably wear once. Wardrobe usually isn't too restricting, as men that don't like to "dress up" don't like going where they have to "dress up".

Exactly, Ashley. I have one nice suit that I only wear for job interviews, funerals, and weddings - and I have a small selection of ties to go with it. For any just-kinda-fancy place (like a restaurant), I usually stick with a nice shirt and sweater.

For better or worse, today there are very few places that require jackets and ties, and guys just seem to naturally stay away from those places.

Oh, and guys have no problem looking the same from one time to the next, or looking like any other guy. Makes life such simpler, but not really less fun.

[Miranda09]

Well, my male wardrobe is limited, but not because I dont like to present as a guy...because I do, but because I just don't have time to go shopping for clothes. Besides, guy clothes are boring!!!!!! However, after saying that....I need to go guy shopping soon!!!!!

[Sonia_cd]

[SIZE=2]Reine, I would have to agree with you. I am quite fond of my male wardrobe and though not as diverse or colourful as my CD wardrobe, there is some variety there. As a matter of fact I completely enjoy dressing in a suit should there be an occassion or being smartly attired when at work or because I felt like it. Do I wish I had the freedom to wear the skirts that I wear as Sonia? Sure, but that's a totally different issue. There is no dislike towards my male wardrobe.

Sonia
[/SIZE]

[ChainedJane]

In my opinion limiting or completely eliminating male clothing would limit or suppress the "male experience." We are what we wear, as they say, and a lot of us like female clothing for the feminine experience, and likewise would shun male clothing if the male experience wasn't wanted.

Personally, I have two sides to my personality: the manly man Patrick and the girly girl Jane. Most of the time, I'm Patrick who likes playing violent video games, listening to metal and watching war movies. Sometimes I feel... girly... and enjoy dance music, romantic comedies, and feeling pretty. Women's clothing allows me to indulge my feminine side completely, becoming the woman that I sometimes wish I was. But I love being a man and men's clothing as well. I would wear a nice tailored suit every single day if I could. Those who call men's clothing boring just haven't experienced the joys and true extent of men's fashions. Or maybe it just isn't their bag.

The clothes make the man, or in a lot of our cases, the woman.

[Sarah_GG]

Sorry... it's a bit boring that I'm always speaking on behalf of my SO... it's just that my SO doesn't tend to come here preferring to spend any free computer time looking at women's clothing sites!

A couple of weeks ago my SO bought three new pairs of jeans/casual work trousers (exhibition industry doesn't do suits) and proudly stated "that'll probably do me for the rest of my working life" His male side does always looks very well turned out.

However... the female wardrobe is a continual work in progress. In the last week I would guess that at least 40 items - from full-blown Danny La Rue outfits, countless pairs of shoes, to MORE peignoirs from the States plus two successful auction bids on mixed lots ("right bust size") that have yet to be collected - have been purchased at not inconsiderable cost. And that's not unusual.

I worry that we're going to be engulfed in sequins, netting petticoats and shimmering silk. The majority of it is second-hand and has a certain... perfume to it!

I'm wondering whether I should tell my SO to slow down or quit or whether to just let it take it's course? After all, he has spent a life time hiding his CDing and is entitled to a little indulgence. But how many wedding dresses is enough?

[EnglishRose]

I've had an irrational hatred of ostensibly male clothing for many years. I think the last time I wore a suit was for an interview for my current job. They're functional items at best.

Reminds me of my friend's sister in junior school. One morning she was forced to come to school in a dress and she was crying her eyes out about it.

[eileendover]

... But how many wedding dresses is enough?

Three. Any more than that is really extravagant.

[Sarah_GG]

Three. Any more than that is really extravagant.

Three... hmmm... wonder if that applies to GGs too?!

Oh. And that number was superseded a long time ago.

[sherri52]

I have kept a suit and if I ever need it again I hope it will fit. The last time I wore it or a dress shirt was three yrs ago 3-16. I go to church every Sunday and the closest anyone dresses in the church is some of the men wear a collard denim shirt, maybe a flannel

[eileendover]

Three... hmmm... wonder if that applies to GGs too?!

Oh. And that number was superseded a long time ago.

I knew a GG who bought three wedding gowns, all for the same wedding! Every time she found the perfect dress, she'd later find one that was even more perfecter.

More than three? Just think of how much extra space your SO would get back by unloading the surplus!

[Chloe Renee]

I think male clothing is boring, I have added colors and patterns. However, I still find male clothing restrictive stylewise.
I really need to buy a suit, but have been putting it off, due to weight loss and changing styles. I don't want to give another suit away without wearing it.
I do what I need to do, I've been in costume for years.
I limit my "male" clothes as follows: I hate polo shirts they are sloppy looking. Same goes for sweat suits.
I try to look neat, a button down at work, at home jeans and tee's. I am the same when it comes to girl clothes, just add peasant skirts, poet shirts and capri's.

As I identified as CD up until recently, I finally admitted to myself that I am TS and have been for years. I haven't talked to a therapist yet so therefore I don't know clinically.
If I were single I would of started RLT probably years ago. I tried to fix myself and found my soulmate. She married a man, a man whom wasn't honest with himself and by proxy lied to her. I carry guilt about the lies but, we have talked since, I admitted to myself what I may be. I respect her wishes and am proceeding at her pace.

I hope this answers some the question.

There would be emoticons but this is from my mobile.

[SouthernBelle.GG]

Like Sarah GG, I feel like I'm always answering for my SO. Like hers, mine also prefers other sites to visit while online nowadays.

My husband dresses quite well for a man. He's always in dress pants and button down dress shirts. Always. He really likes to present himself well no matter if he's in male mode or en femme. Although, he does have more feminine apparel to choose from. It's just more fun to shop for girly stuff! I'll give him that.

So, the limiting of male experiences because of the limiting of male clothes really isn't an issue here. He likes being a guy and looking nice as a guy. Yeah, I'm no help.

[Lynn Marie]

I like both sides of me and do my best to present myself well. My male wardrobe is considerably bigger than my feminine one. I really like western wear and the choices are terrific. I have 6 pairs of western boots from python to calf skin. When I went looking for a new pair of brown regular shoes last year, I could only find 1 pair that I even half way liked. There's just nothing out there for men anymore.

I have to look a little harder than most for tall sizes and then have to get my jackets altered for sleeve length. My SO appreciates my looking good as I do her efforts.

Part of this may be a delayed reaction to the fact that my ex was a hoarder and slowly squeezed me out of our closet and finally out of our house. Now I've got two closets, all mine, and the hairy ape I live here with.

[ReineD]

Thank you so much for all your responses! And please keep them coming!

I can certainly understand that unless money is no object, men's clothing is limited and drab compared to women's and of course for a CD they are not as much fun to wear. Also, men's suits are expensive, so it would cost a fortune to have the same amount of variety. I am not suggesting this at all.

I also get that guys in general would much rather bang around in jeans than have to dress up. Two of my sons are like this. In fact, it wasn't until one of my sons was in college that he looked forward to wearing a collared shirt on occasion ... and that was because his girlfriend encouraged him.

Still, the men I know have a smallish variety of clothes just there, at the ready for when the occasion demands it. It is true they do not experience the intense pleasure out of wearing them as a CD does in wearing a pretty dress. But I do not believe they hate wearing them either. I would liken the extent of my brother's, my father's, my ex's pleasure in wearing the fancier clothes, when required, to mine. It is something that covers the body and it follows the event's decorum. I like to wear pretty things that set off my figure and flatter my complexion, but once I put them on, I don't think about them much. The focus then turns to the experience at hand, whatever it may be. There is no dopamine release for me when I wear clothes, no matter how stylish, except perhaps knowing that seeing me in them might have an effect on my SO.

So my question is altered slightly. For those of you to whom it applies, is there an objection to wearing the male clothes (when indicated), or just having them around at the ready, because it doesn't measure up to the pleasure derived out of wearing femme stuff?

Does the impulse to seek an ever improved femme look cause a resentment in keeping a most basic variety of men's clothing?

Just for the record .. my SO and I do have a very casual lifestyle. There is no need for dressing up when we are out in guy mode. But, she did agree to buy a guy outfit for fancier events. We just haven't got around to it yet.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

I look at my male wardrobe more as a means of functionality. Meaning for non work situations I have a T shirt, jeans and a pair of shoes. Nothing more is really needed and it allows me to do anything and everything I need to while in male mode. Work attire consist of a few boring suits, shirts and ties (nothing too loud, very conservative in nature). Again it serves the same purpose in that it allows me to conduct business while in male mode.

I have always primarly been of the view point that I did not like spending money on my male wardrobe regardless of my gender issues. When I was younger I would have preffered to spend every cent I had on video games as opposed to clothes. That still hasn't changed except that I now prefer to spend every cent I have on my fem wardrobe.

Basically my male side never has and never will be the type of guy that is interested in sporting the latest Tommy Hilfiger, FUBU, Polo, or Rocawear outfit. Maybe it's the one benifit that my male side does have in that I can wear very bland boring clothing and have no limitations as a guy.

[kaitlin]

I guess the best way to answer this is to say that I have a nice collection of both male and female clothes. Pretty much what ever comes up I've got something to wear. The only thing male I do not own any of is underware. I only wear cotton, microfiber or silk panties!

[Ruth]

I guess I would agree with Jocelyn that functionality is the word when it comes to my male wardrobe. I like my male clothes but they are very much costumes for the various roles I carry out as a man.
My female clothes on the other hand are mostly not functional but are just to express my feminine side. I do have a few outfits that I bought purely to have something sensible to wear when I go out as Ruth, on shopping trips etc.

[Cheryl T]

In my case I have always worked in areas that either required a uniform or where dress attire was not the standard. I do own a suit but rarely wear it as our circle does not include venues where such attire is required or the norm.
I suppose that is why I pay more attention to my female wardrobe and take greater delight in being able to wear pretty things and look my best.

[eileendover]

.... For those of you to whom it applies, is there an objection to wearing the male clothes (when indicated), or just having them around at the ready, because it doesn't measure up to the pleasure derived out of wearing femme stuff?

Does the impulse to seek an ever improved femme look cause a resentment in keeping a most basic variety of men's clothing?

Nope, no objection or resentment at all to having and wearing male clothes - whatever the occasion calls for. I do indeed like that "the occasion" usually doesn't call for much variety. Guys are fine dressing just like every other guy every day. Whenever it makes sense, I'll even buy multiples of exactly the same item of clothing in the same color. Simple is good.

Dressing femme is completely different, and I would never buy two of the same thing. Different looks are kinda the point, even when not "required" by the occasion.