Do you enjoy being male (as well as female)?

[Josie Angel]

I do! In fact, I use the word bi-gender to describe myself because I embody both male and female. And I know my soulmate will love both my masculine and feminine energy. I could never choose between them. Choosing one 100% of the time over the other would feel like a denial of my true self. As much as I would love to have a real female body or live as female part time, I would never want to stop being male, to close that door. I do mourn the fact that I will never have real breasts, or a vagina, or experience childbirth. But I cherish all the experiences of being a woman that I am able to have.

I am working with a life coach and part of my homework is learning about and connecting with others who are bi-gender. I would love to hear your stories, the joys and sorrows of being torn between (and embraced by) two genders. This will be validating for me (and hopefully for you too). I am moving towards self-acceptance. So talking with others who are like me and having it reinforced that this is normal and okay (and even beautiful and wonderful) will be a healing experience for me.

[Veronica Nowakowski]

I used that exact term for months. However, I'm feeling more and more transgendered as time goes on. I was excited about having balanced energy, and then I went past the balance and I'm feeling fine with it.

For me, I think it was a stage.

[Sweeterica]

I feel very happy being male as well as female, i would love however to have real breasts, that for me would be so lovely,no more than that. Im happy being born a man just love being able to escape into that femine side oh bliss.

[brittany michelle]

We are verry happy to co-exist

[sherri52]

I follow the path of both genders. I prefer to wear womens clothing but at the same time I want to be with a woman. I like to play ball and watch war movies, yet I also collect jewelry and have a collection of porcelon dolls (no I don't play with them). I spend most of my time with GG's either in drab or dressed. Like most men I hate to shave, yet every part of my body is free of hair less one. If this is what you call bi-gender then I'm with you.

[jenifer m.]

of course i was born a male,and have always done male things,but ive always known that there was more to myself that i couldent identify.it took years to finally come to terms with the fact that im different than other guys,and that i had a very pronounced female side that wanted to come out,but i suppressed her for most of my life.i would say that within about the last 8 years ive really accepted the fact that im a crossdresser or transvestite.i still very much love all the male things i do,and would not change them for any thing but im also embracing my feminine side more,and more every day.ive truly found that as i have intertwined both of my sides i really feel more relaxed,more complete,more focused,and in general have less of a chip on my shoulder with the world,and im finding im calmer,and way more understanding of others.so without jenifer im not a whole being.im glad shes part of who i am now,and wouldent do away with her for anything....those are just my ramblings.

[Veronica Nowakowski]

I follow the path of both genders. I prefer to wear womens clothing but at the same time I want to be with a woman. I like to play ball and watch war movies, yet I also collect jewelry and have a collection of porcelon dolls (no I don't play with them). I spend most of my time with GG's either in drab or dressed. Like most men I hate to shave, yet every part of my body is free of hair less one. If this is what you call bi-gender then I'm with you.

Jewelry and porcelain dolls are feminine by society, not nature. Ball and war movies are the same. It's an energy that is masculine or feminine, a way of looking at the world and reacting to it.

[Kerigirl2009]

I do enjoy being male because it makes me, me. My male side has found the love of my life and given me four beautiful children that I can be a father to.

I do prefer to be around women though as I enjoy the conversation so much more as I feel I relate more personally to what they have to say. Now I do have male friends that I enjoy talking with, however I usually do not have the same drive as they do when it comes to hanging out and say working on a car. YUCK. Now if you could put them in a room with a deck of cards, AWESOME!!!

But my best friend is also my wife, so I am very happy to hang out with her as much as possible.

If I could without fear of alienation, I would love to have those same conversations with both the men and the women dressed in normal everyday womens clothing or as I like to say where my clothing that makes me feel comfortable. This would make me happier then hiding a part of me that makes me, me.

[Cassandra Lynn]

While i agree with you on most of your self description, i have never had any feelings of wishing i had female body parts or of giving birth. In those regards i'm perfectly happy with my male body and the male way of life, and it is only in this past year that i have truly allowed my full femme side to bloom. I also find myself wanting to and striving to spend time with GG friends and acquaintances, and feeling more at peace when i can be with them. This next year i hope to more fully evolve Cassie and get to know her. mj (Cassie)

[gabimartini]

Yep, I enjoy both ends of my psyche, female and male. Don't think I'd be able to choose either one. Sometimes I'm male, sometimes I'm female, and I'm learning to be ok with that!

[Ashley Allen]

I embody both male and female. And I know my soulmate will love both my masculine and feminine energy. I could never choose between them. Choosing one 100% of the time over the other would feel like a denial of my true self.

I'm still new to accepting this and right now my urges are to go way over bored and I spend a lot of time wishing I had a female body; however, I think the newness of this will fade a bit and I will find a balance. My unhappiness in life has been because of supressing part of myself, not from being a male. If I were to go to the other extreme I think I would be just as unhappy.

I like the references to the energy, and recognize my SO positive energy feedback from my feminine energy, and her negative feedback from my masculine energy... just wish she could admit the same... then perhaps I could enjoy shopping for her outfits and spoil her rather than myself. For now I prefer to be selfish.

[SusanLCD]

I definitely feel more male, but, like many of you, have always felt that I was different from my other male friends. I'm glad to go about my typical day in male mode and to be accepted as such. I guess I'm comfortable with it.

I only need to let Susan out periodically; no need to be Susan 24/7. Yet, if I ignore her for too long, she comes roaring out and reminds me that she's still there and that I need to pay attention to her. After all these years, it's still a surprise to me. (You'd think I'd learn, but, apparently, not. )

[Sarah Doepner]

I'm a transvestite and enjoy preparing and presenting myself to look as much like a woman as I can. The results are mixed, but I feel very comfortable and wouldn't want to lose that option. I've never wanted to go through any of the iconic physical female experiences and I find my male body to be complicated and challenging enough to manage. I enjoy doing things that are typically associated with men, but know of many women who participate in the same activities. The physical isn't the critical measurement here.

The real challenge is sorting out the psychological and emotional differences between genders. I still can't wrap my mind around much of how my wife or most other women view the world and their place in that world. I hate to use stereotypes, but that's all I have because I can't get hold of reality. I'm concerned for family and want to help them all I can, but unlike many women I know, I have to keep my own needs in the equation from the start, not after I've compromised my health or security. I have yet to melt over any infant not my own, and baby animals on TV don't bring out my maternal instinct.

I don't believe that wanting to be "pretty" or feeling happy at the touch of soft, smooth fabrics and enjoying delicate floral scents is expressly female. Nor are most typically male activities exclusively male. There is a set of differences between Male and Female and it seems we are trying to find it. Dressing and presenting and interacting as much like a woman may be a good first step, but we won't find it in the makeup section, it's somewhere else.

[Bobbie Bee]

Strange, I was thinking about this notion just yesterday. I had the house to myself and so I dressed femm for most of the day. I took a lot of pix and although I thought I look "okay" dressed in femm, I was still a male. In fact, the longer I stay dressed, the more I desire to come out to my wife. But, I'm too scared, at the moment, to go there right now. The conflict is driving me crazy, but I'm still a male and don't want to be female 24/7.

[victoriamwilliams1]

For me I feel transgender and I have the odd thing where I actually adopt a total feminine outlook when dressed. As a guy I am 100% guy and as a woman I am 100% woman in how I feel.

I think that each of us have so many varants in how we are I know I have found a few who are like me and my favorite change is when online commuicating with men I use different words with them and do not have a problem calling a guy handsome when in girl mode responding, now in guy mode I will not do that.

I also enjoy my guy side becuase he is around 98% of the time

[Jessy]

I haven't had the luckiest life so far, I've known much misfortune with career, relationships, friends, and more. Always was I looking to find social contacts, make friends, and being accepted. Since this is often a matter of social standards, I never let Jessy out in front of anyone but myself.
But I can't help wondering sometimes, if my life would have been different if I was born a GG. I always was more comfortable with the female side, and around female friends. I still haven't found my balance, and only time will tell. Fact is that my life as a male, trying to work up, trying to find friends, going out, is often much harder and still more boring than the few times a week seeing Jessy at home.

[Josie Angel]

Wow. Thanks for all the great replies, everyone. Lots of good stuff here. I plan to come back later and write out more detailed responses to everyone. This is definitely validating.

[ellenwannabe]

Actually the only time I'm gald I'm a guy is when I go to the restroom and see the very long line at the ladies room - Ellen

[frisbee_girl]

A slightly different perspective, but hopefully just as validating. I would not consider myself to be bi-gendered. I truly enjoy, and am a bit vain, about my maleness. I don't say that I dress in 'drab' or call myself a gyrl when I do dress up. It feels a bit forced for me.

That being said, I truly enjoy dressing. It does feel good, but I've yet to determine whether that good feeling is Kayleigh being fulfilled or if it's just the thought of Kayleigh.

I don't know... I'm new to this discovery process myself. This is a great place to air out your thoughts. I've found that there is a continuum and there are people on here at every stage. Right now I resonate the most with being a guy all the time but enjoys dressing and pretending to be female from time to time and LOVE underdressing (I've got thigh highs and a really sexy bra and thong set on right now at work). This is in opposition to feeling like Kayleigh is some visceral part of me. Feels more like a fun fetish right now. But I'm committed to the discovery process and if Kayleigh gets more of a voice, then I suppose I'll have to listen.

[boy2girl31]

Guess I am the odd one to post here but I thought it would be nice to have someone who does not feel as you do. The question was do you like both sides of yourself. I for one do not like my male side and wish it could be cut from me like the cancer I feel it is. I do see your point and understand i only wish I were able to accept my male side but I hate it too much.

[minalost]

Yep, I enjoy both ends of my psyche, female and male. Don't think I'd be able to choose either one. Sometimes I'm male, sometimes I'm female, and I'm learning to be ok with that!

For me I feel transgender and I have the odd thing where I actually adopt a total feminine outlook when dressed. As a guy I am 100% guy and as a woman I am 100% woman in how I feel.

I think Gabi and Victoria have the right idea. I don't have any choice but to like both sides of my nature. I'm not interested in going femme full time - my wife would NOT go for thay anyway - and there are some things I can do in male mode that I can't in female mode.

[Sewing_Sophie]

I try to avoid thinking too hard about what I really am... however, there's definitely a feeling, a mood, that comes and goes, and when I don't have it crossdressing just feels stupid, and I can't do it. It's sometimes annoying, as one part of me wants to feel all the good feelings that come from crossdressing, but if that... feminine mood? (that's how I like to think of it) isn't there then I can't get anything out of it. This limits me to dressing once or twice a week (not counting bedtime where I wear a pink nightdress more often than not), even though there's room in my life for more of it than that.

Being male... is kinda handy in a practical sense, less problems with sexism and all that. When I'm in the right mood there are some awesome bits of menswear that give the masculine equivalent of the femme feeling I get from crossdressing, shame the occasion for wearing them doesn't come up so often.

Right now, I've been buying a lot of treats for my feminine side, and been getting a lot of acceptance and validation from the people I've come out to (and compliments on my skirts and dresses), whereas the male me is feeling distinctly invalidated by still being single and having to push himself through the hell that is online dating. But he's definitely there, that can't be denied.

[Jessy]

Just a little addition, after I reread Victoria's quote.
My feminine side is still the same me, I have accepted that. When dressed up, I can't say I feel being 100% feminine, I'm just myself with both the female and male parts of me. When being male it's different, because I suppress the feminine side from showing.
And that's why I feel so much better as Jessy. Because I'm just me.

[TNRobin]

I enjoy both sides of myself, both Robert and Helen. My chosen profession that I'm getting into would be a bit more difficult as a woman, but almost impossible as a transvestite. My past job in the military was only open to men, so being a woman would have been out of the question. I enjoy guy things; Jeeps, guns, hunting, that sort of thing and while I know that women can do those things too that's the part of me that I reserve for Robert.

Helen is the side of me that I just plain enjoy at other times. Sometimes I could go days as Helen, but it would create problems being out locally. I really enjoy the freedom of expression in fashion, the clothes, the shoes, the make-up and the night wear. After all, if you ever have a man's suit made they'll show you books of fabrics that literally contain hundreds of shades of gray, black and dark blues. How boring!

Since it's impossible to become a changeling like you see in some science fiction movies then what I would really like is the following. That makes the assumption that society would accept it. I'd like to be completely hairless, minus the top of my head of course, and I'm working on that at the moment with laser hair removal. I'd like to have the build of a female, the hips, the breasts, the waist, the whole shape and I'd like to dress as a female (skirts or dresses) almost all of the time, but at the same time I'd like to be a guy just on occasion.

Yeah, I know, sounds really mixed up, and maybe I am, but for now I'm just taking the ride and seeing where it takes me. Afterall, the journey is the real adventure, the destination is just a place.

[sissystephanie]

Yes, I do enjoy being a male. Which is good, since I am one! Although I have been a CD for most of my 70 plus years, I have never had the desire to actually be a woman. When my late wife did my makeup and fixed my wig, I was quite passable. But I rarely, even then, hid the fact that I was a man. Now that she is gone, I still dress as Stephanie and go out, but presenting as a man in a dress or skirt! I am a CD who loves wearing feminine clothing, and I do have natural 40 B breasts. But underneath I am still a MAN!!