Louise, one of life's challenges is to not allow your heart to harden in self-protection after you get hurt. Even though you would protect yourself from experiencing future pain, you would also insulate yourself against the joy of sharing your heart with another human being.
There is someone for you out there.
Reine
[SIZE="3"]Oh. ok. I certainly almost moved 2000 miles from them, in 1981, and considered never speaking to them again. My mom is 87 , dying with Alzheimers. My only sister is 60, with a severe speech impediment, and she helps my very ornery dad weekends, but, he can't understand her. I believe the family has curses! I will stop addressing this, as i have gotten way off my thread topic. Thanks for your input![/SIZE]
I once read a research study that said Beautiful women are attracted to less attractive men because there no competitions and these men appreciate them more. One thing this web site has shown is, many GGs on here extrude beauty just by wanting to understand why there SO CDs. How many men would do the same if the tables were reversed? “Beautify is in the eyes of the beholder" Unfortunately, vanity plays apart in my crossdressing. It epitomizes the type of women I would like to meet.
[SIZE="3"]Krystal, well said. I dress up as the lady type i would like..but, am willing to compromise on looks, a little. A wise king once declared, "All is vanity, and a striving after the wind," Song-"All we are is dust in the wind." Reine, that is true. I donnot totally isolate, and we all do need to interact, even if its only with a few. I sound like a hermit, but am not. I even go to singles dances in drab, but, am a bit of an exrtoverted introvert, am Bi-polar.[/SIZE]
Love is a very dangerous thing. My best advice is to stay away. For as they say: Only fools rush in where wise men never dare. It's illogical, unproven and ill defined, and makes you act stupidly, recklessly. Plus it makes you so vulnerable. It opens up your heart to someone who gets inside you and if her feelings aren't as deep, sincere, innocent and sweet, she can really mess you up, leave you scarred for life... that is, IF you survive. Because when you open yourself too wide, she can cut you deep, bleed you dry and lay your soul to waste. You build up your defenses for a reason, so that nothing can hurt you emotionally. Because while there are many who won't, there are many more who could and would and you never know which until it's too late. Love begins for the dumbest of reasons; a smile, a look, the sound of her voice, the turn of a phrase. You feel the rush, the heat, the thrill of something new, you don't know what, you just know it's coming from her. And why? All because you let down your guard for a moment, the wrong moment is what I say! And now it's time to run, not walk away! Better yet... Fly!
But you won't because you can't. In those first few moments you want more, not less! Your eyes dilate, palms sweat, heart beats faster, your brain stops thinking and you feel better than good, you're feeling great! It's like a drug and suddenly you're addicted. To feel those feelings are the 1st symptoms. Far from being well you're on your way to hell and by her vampires bite, infected, soon to turn. You wake up with new eyes wide open, and look out at a world transformed. She's the 1st thing on your mind, you feel her inside, ever present. No matter what you do, where you go or with whom, near or far you're never apart, never alone, always connected. You see the world as never before, a part of you is here, the other part with her unaffected. Your life isn't your own anymore! You didn't have to let her in, but you did. For one weak moment you were tempted, you let down your guard now you're in love, and by her love, held hostage. Love is a disease. It gets inside you. And sooner or later it eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness. So simple a phrase like "maybe we should be just friends" turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul deep hurt, it rips you apart, leaves you broken and scarred; so great is the pain, so overwhelming your agony. I hate love.
"No body can make you feel inferior without your consent"
--Eleanor Roosevelt
Verbal assaults and condescending behavior directed toward others are always connected to low self-esteem issues of the person initiating the behavior. The most effective response is no response at all. Just view it as a red flag informing you that you do not need that person in your life.
"Never interrupt your opposition when they are in the process of hanging themselves."
Life is too short to base your worth on the opinions and judgements made by others. Most of the people observing the behavior of these people, recognize it as a display of questionable character, even if they do not respond accordingly.
Revenge is simply the process of entering a characterless game with no winners, or satisfaction.
ThinkLess, ActMore...life is short
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
The GG merry-go-round. It ended for me when I became happy and accepting of who I am. Then, I quit hoping for some one but waited till I found the right one. It took a few years but was worth the wait. Every new person you meet has the potential and that raises your hopes as all are perfect till you get to know them. Make a list of what you want and cross them off your list when they don't measure up.
Forget about that woman in your first post. I think we all know that not every woman (GG) will be in favor of seeeing a man dressing as a woman and wanting to be feminine. But, Then there are some that don't mind, and will actually help you be all the girl you want to be.... Just be open and honest with the women you meet or want to develop a relationship with they will either say that they don't mind or they don't like it. for the later say thanks and move on.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/76795368@N07/
International Men Can Wear A Dress Too Day, Tuesday, May 15 2012
Hi I'm Nicole and I'm a GG. Me and my fiance have been together for over a year and our second month in he started talking to me about CDing. Deep down inside I already knew that he had these feelings. We started playing around with nail polish, makeup, underwear and I noticed the more we experienced together the closer I felt to him. I felt this way because it was as if he understood me better. Its like that old saying "walk a mile in her shoes". Now my SO is planing on doing it fulltime and I'm very supportive of her choice. So don't give up because you had a bad experience, there is someone out there for you.
(An important note is that I met him as a him, and began to learn about her. Being honest with your potential SO is the most important step in the right direction.)
[SIZE="3"]Nicole, Thanks for that. I have never been dressed meeting a gg, and have only told two older gg's. No way would i meet a gg as Louise. I have had yo overcome my awful neediness, and not need a SO, be content alone. We enter this cruel world alone , and go back to the dust alone. I'll sure miss my pets, though...and heels.[/SIZE]
Hey Louise, I'm Nicole's fiance and from personal experience I can tell you it can be tough but not to give up. I wasn't dressed as Rachel when I met Nicole. We started doing Rachel and Nicole together and now she is so comfortable with it that Rachel is going to stay around 24/7.Originally Posted by Treetop Louise
RuPaul once said you have to own your life. With that said you need to own your life. Tell yourself what you want in life and then go out and get it. We all are going to hit setbacks but what is important is that we don't let those setbacks define us. I know you'll find someone you just need to keep looking, she is out there but you'll never find her if you don't look.
I would say move on & don't let it bother you. There are alot of wonderful
GG's out there. Don't let any self centered airhead get you down.
Where, I did not see her? he he I am LOL at my own lack of relationships.
[SIZE="3"]Thanks to all of you who replied, and for advice. Now, i just need to call Dr. Laura and Roy Masters! Roy has said, that boys and men, tend to look too much to girls and women, putting them on thrones! Girls deify boys, too. Then, for all of us, the deified lover falls down, and conflicts, and reality hits! We all make the mistake. Relationships are not easy. The gg who lives upstairs from me, is a frigid loner, has no friends, does not want any, and hates to even say hi. At least i am out there pitching, even if i never have a SO. But, it is a good idea to walk alone, until some issues are dealt with. For some of us from extreme dysfunction families, this takes some years.[/SIZE]
Yeah I would have to agree with you Louise. Relationships are always work, the ones worth keeping and fighting for anyway. But in order to get what you want out of any relationship you need to really focus on yourself first. You know, self-love and self-fulfillment, your hopes and desires. As for families,it can be difficult at times, and if your family is anything like mine, there are far from perfect and far from one's own dream of what a family should be. But I wanna heal from that, in order to be happy with my own S/O. That old baggage can damage any new joy of one's life.
So remember stay positive. Family stuff is what it is, but your family doesn't define you, you define yourself
Loise I am pleased to see you taking steps to get to know you and deal with some of your issues, I wish you well and if ever you feel the need to talk to someone do not hesitate to PM me
I allow myself to set healthy boundaries ..... to say no to what does not align with my values, to say yes to what does.
Boundaries assist me to remain healthy, honest and living a life that is true to me
You are right to stay out there. Too many people just give in to their solitude and accept their cage. Don't do it. And remember, we're really only about 10% of our upbringing. The other 90% is what we choose to do about it.
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