Has she gone?

[Tomara]

Hi Deb
I have to agree with everyone else.
I'm sure she will be back sooner or later so you would probably be wise to keep all your girl things for when she does.
Good luck and don't be a stranger here !
Tomara

[Deborah_UK]

I'm confused, last thing I recall was that you were saying you were TS, I see your wife Sheila alludes to Charing Cross - what happened there to produce the about face?

[Deborah Jane]

I'm confused, last thing I recall was that you were saying you were TS, I see your wife Sheila alludes to Charing Cross - what happened there to produce the about face?

Hi Deborah, a lot has happened in my life since then, and yes, there was a referral to Charing Cross.
Since the last time I dressed on New Years Eve, I have done a lot of soul searching. During that soul searching the desire to dress and be Debs has pretty much dissappeared, the clothes and all the trimmings are still there, but right now it means nothing to me. I still regard myself as TG, although I am now unsure where I am with it.
I guess only time will tell as to whether there will be another re'emergance of Debs. She may never return, but by the same token, if she comes back next week, neither Sheila or myself have a problem with it.

Thank you everybody else who answered me, for all the help, support and advice

[Deborah_UK]

Thanks for that explanation Deborah Jane - I wish you both well however the route takes you.

[trisha59]

Its been slightly longer for me (Age thing? )but I am keeping the clothes. The only risk as I see it is if the desire returns will they still be in style.

[sterling12]

Gone, (temporarily,) but obviously not forgotten! Think about it, if she were really gone, you wouldn't need to tell us about it, and you wouldn't be writing queries concerning your situation.

Bag it! Store it! Leave it with a Friend! But, keep your stuff....you going to need it!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Jaclyn NM]

Well, I have found that if she was once there, she'll always be there. I can't tell you how many time I've purged, only to have to go back out at some later date (in one case twelve years), to buy new female clothes. I've finally accepted that no matter what I do she'll always be there calling me back and eventually I'll give in. So my advice is save yourself some money, and hold on to your female clothing.

[Shelly Preston]

In a word [SIZE="4"] NO[/SIZE]

I have no doubt Debs will be back not sure when but she will return

[Rachaelb64]

Keep the clothes. Debs will be back, you know deep down she is lurking.
Whereever you go from here, you've got the love & support of a good woman next you

[joanna marie]

Keep the clothes, I think that we have all purged a few times
I just went 18 months without dressing and was glad that I saved most of my stuff because Joanna Marie just had to come back out , just as I knew she would.

After all that time I was really glad to be dressed again, it felt so good and natural.

I did get to buy a new dress to replace one I got rid of

[stephanie100]

I went 7 years without steph. Debs will be back Its who we are.

[KayleeDahl]

I think we have reached a general consensus that she'll be back. I sure wish I still had all the stuff I've donated over the years when i decided i'd never need it again.

Hugs
Kaylee

[~Michelle~]

Before it came back last time, it was gone for 28 years

Quite fascinating... why do you think it was gone for such a long time? It could help to answer your question.

[Freddy12]

I agree with everyone else that she will be back. Maybe next month, maybe next year. I agree that you should keep the clothes. I, too have purged stuff only to buy the same stuff again - what a waste of money.

Perhaps if you store the stuff in a place that is not readily accessable, things might be more clear. It's a bit like purging, but not completely. Perhaps a friend coul store the stuff for you. Just a thought.

[Nigella]

I have got to know you over the last year or so and I hope that I have been a font of wisdom for you. As many have said, Debs is an integral part of who you are, the only thing that matters is how much a part of you.

That is something that happens by varying degrees on a day by day basis. As you have said, things have been busy and dare I say chaotic for you recently and Debs may have been that release away from those pressures.

Since your settlement where you are now, you have shown a more comfortable side, in respect of pressure, this has negated your need for Debs to be constantly uppermost.

The decision to purge is one only you can decide. There are those around you who will help if you want it. May I suggest a different approach, try a mini purge. Go through what Debs has, look to see if it is relevant to where you are in repect of Debs or Deborah, you know what I mean by that. Keep those that are relevant to who and where you are, sell, give away or even burn those you don't want, whatever makes you feel right, parcel up the rest and store them.

[Carly D.]

I'm in the same boat, different oar... I keep everything the same way, stored in the same tote box with the knowledge that the want to cross dress will likely return sometime.. Truth is if I threw everything away the desire would hit me as soon as the trash was picked up.. I'd hate to have to chase the trash truck down and say I accidentally threw something out, can I get it out really quick IT'S A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH!!! I have thrown everything away and shortly thereafter regretted it.. So my advice would be store it someplace.. That's what I am doing.

[Ronni Seymour]

If you're like me, Deb will eventually come back. Don't throw the clothes away unless you want to spend more of that hard earned money to start over with a new wardrobe!

[serinalynn]

Has she gone?
The last time I "dressed" was New Years Eve, since then nothing. Everything is stored in bags and boxes, just in case she comes back, but for the last few months there has been no desire to be Debs.

The question is do I keep everything on the off chance that my dressing will return, or do I just get rid of it all and leave this part of me behind?

What do you think?......Gone for good or lurking in my subconcious waiting to come back at some time in the future?

Succume to the pressure of being partly, mostly or wholly feminine. I have thought about just going back and being me MALE self..... Fact of the matter is I don't believe I can. I love my FEMALE side so much, I just can't give it up.
I've had a 3 day weekend and I've been dressed feminine all 3 days. Had fun doing it too. I've been out in public and no one seem to care if I dress as a woman or not. My wife has been very supportive lately. I'm going to drive to Minnesota in about 3 weeks will be dressed femme while driving and taking lots of femme clothes with me.
I'll have lots of fun too being feminine while I can. It's fun being a girl!!

[Jonianne]

Has she gone?......

Gone? Where? Who is that posting as Deborah Jane? Must be Sheila pretending to be Debs!

Debs, except to take recent pics, I havn't dressed or gone out in a year and a half. No big deal. I still enjoy being on the forum and communicating with kindred spirits. You still sound like Debs to me. Don't go away. Keep your cloths and shoes in the closet. They are still yours. You don't go to the prom every day. Just got to keep them handy in case you do decide to go.

When off the forum, Debs is just crossdressing as some guy Sheila married!

[serinalynn]

Before it came back last time, it was gone for 28 years [It dissapeared when I was 17 and didn't return again until I was 45] so you can understand how I feel it could just dissapear again. It did before, will it again?

No it won't, just succumb to your female self and enjoy it, I do and I like my female self. I can do it as much or as little as I want to. I just cannot turn it off.

[Ruth]

In many ways life would be simpler without CDing. So I have to admit that if the desire just disappeared tomorrow and never returned, I wouldn't be upset.
But I don't believe for a minute that would happen, and every time I have 'rested' from CDing it has always been in the expectation that the urge would return - and it has. I think it's a life sentence.

[Rianna Humble]

Its been slightly longer for me (Age thing? )but I am keeping the clothes. The only risk as I see it is if the desire returns will they still be in style.

Retro is always in style

But to get back to the original question:

The question is do I keep everything on the off chance that my dressing will return, or do I just get rid of it all and leave this part of me behind?

What do you think?

I think you should keep it, because otherwise (to quote the film Casablanca out of context) "you'll regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life."

OTOH, it would be a good excuse to shop

[Kaz]

Debs,

Do you want to stop? You may. You have just been through some major upheaval and have probably gone into "do it" mode, and this will have been a natural response that will have pulled at your core self... which sad to say is male! And you have probably really been enjoying it! And now you are sorted, "he" is feeling good?

There is nothing my male side likes more than problem solving and getting stuff sorted. I have been attacking my overgrown garden the last two days and although I am still Kaz, I have felt no desire to dress. I go away for a few days tomorrow and this is an opportunity for Kaz... I aren't really in that space... maybe I will be tomorrow, though I have been through this before!

She will come back. You know this. And when she does she will want compensation for the lost time.

Me, I am happy to live with Kaz... for now. But maybe not forever?

In the meatime, as has been said before... don't matter what you're wearing, you is Debs!!!

[serinalynn]

Your right Kaz, the SHE side of me always returns, but in some respects my she side never seems to go away. My she side is always there and waiting to return. I enjoy my she time a lot.

[suit]

just put stuff away clean so it does not rot while it is stored! moth balls too keep out the squirles !
ooh and just to see, in your mind pretend that in 3 weeks your whole collection wont be able to be touched for 5 years ! see if in three weeks and three days your not dressed to the nines!