Why is it that when a girl wants to be a boy she could just be called a Tom boy and dress like a guy wihout being judged as much as a guy deciding he wants to have fun and put some makeup and short skirts on and try to experiment? Mabey someone can explain why our current day society is like this.
Good question. I hope the answer happens soon.
Because I don't know either.
Luv Emma.
I have no explaination as to why our society is like this, but you, me, all of us here, are also members of society We, if want to badly enough, can change this situation by being who we are.Originally Posted by Veryconfused
Nobody stops you being you and is not illegal to go out dressed exactly as you wish [within sensible reason] If you want to go out and be your femme self, what's to really stop you?
Many of us here do go out "dressed", some more than others and guess what?.....Society still functions, those who go out, enjoy living their lives, the world carries on.......No one really cares!!!
you know growing up I was what society deemed a tomboy, not for me the stupid frilly pink dresses, the silly Barbie/Cindy dolls, I was one of the boys, I climbed tress, rode cows(as well as horses) bareback, I played cops n robbers, cowboys and indians ............... and incessantly I heard the lament "why can't you be like XYZ from 3 doors away ..... she's a proper little girl"at 50 I can still do many things "proper" women (and some men) wouldn't have a clue how to do, I can mess under hoods of cars, wire electrical goods, (when living with thw MIL it was me who changed the light fitting at the top of the stairs when it went not Debs (she has a tendency to set fire to things when dealing with electrics
)and several other things along those lines ............ it does not make me any less of a woman just as putting on a skirt does not make you any less of a man ............. if I can venture into the world doing "man" things the only thing stopping you going out as you want is not society but YOU YOURSELF
Stop moaning/wondering why women do what they do and get away with it, start doing what you would like to do and make society accept you, you are not doing anything illegal, so what is stopping you ?
I allow myself to set healthy boundaries ..... to say no to what does not align with my values, to say yes to what does.
Boundaries assist me to remain healthy, honest and living a life that is true to me
I'm in complete agreement with Debs and Shelia. We are a part of society so therefore we should be the ones proving that we can wear what we want and act how we want.
I'm doing my part. I'm currently writing a fictional novel that's based on my experiences crossdressing growing up. As soon as I'm done writing it I will be coming out of the closet to everybody I know and I'll be shopping it around to publishers as the person that I am deep inside.
Will the going get tough? Hell yeah! Am I excited to traverse the uncharted territory of my life as an uncloseted crossdresser? Oh, hell yeah!
I agree completely with what your saying and it just so happens that when I started university I wrote a piece of work on a similar matter.
please note this is just my opinion on the matter and does not mean that it is true.
I believe that the basic answer is that in modern day society women have more rights than men. This is because when women were fighting for the right to vote and be seen as equal they won which they should have as they are equal. However since then some women still campaign which is why in the modern day females have more rights than males and so females are not judged on what they wear where as males are.
please let me again stress that this is only an opinion and that I do treat women as equals.
Judging from the number of inquisitive posts you made recently, it looks like your bell went off. Questions and more questions start to pop and it's easy to get overwhelmed by the lack of understanding. A lot of us go through that, I know I did.
Unfortunately, some answers just don't exist. Why does society frown on men wearing dresses, I don't know! Why does time move forward and not backward? Why does the sun come up every day? Why don't I win the lottery? Why wasn't I born a GG?
Some things are just the way they are, end of story. Although there could be technical explanations to some questions, they would certainly not give you the relief you need. For instance, technically the probability of a baby being boy or girl is 50% each -- however, understanding that from a technical point of view does little for me, since in my heart I sometimes feel I was born in the wrong 50%.
In your case, what would a lengthly explanation about gender-related behavioral patterns of Western societies do for you? Not much. You'd understand why people frown on CDing, but it wouldn't change the fact they continue to frown, you know?
The best you can do is get to know yourself, your desires, your needs, your limitations, accept them and just carry on. The kind of answers your looking for are inside your heart, and they will come to you when you are ready to deal with them. I know this may sound like hogwash from some kids movie, but it's true. Your answers, the ones that work only for you, will come, give it time.
You do realise thats the million dollar question?
Why?
5 reasons
1. Women wanting to emulate men is seen as a positive move since women were historically deemed to be the weaker and lesser sex. It was considered a natural thing for women to dream about achieving the higher status
2. Being the lesser sex, society was not particularly threatened, tomboys were after all expected to marry and have children like all other women. It was never seen as a threat or corruption of society, more a childhood adventure.
3.The male image is about power and authority which are not taboo concepts. The traditional female image is primarily sexual and sex is a taboo subject.
4. Male gender upbringing has a dislike/fear of emotional closeness amongst males - basically homophobia so a male CD is always considered a sexual threat. Whereas homophobia is not a central tenant of female upbringing so it does not set off any alarm bells
5. The feminist movement thought that to obtain equality women would have to behave and compete directly with men so all the weaknesses and submissiveness associated with femininity had to be ditched. Feminists socially engineered female crossdressing to be an outward sign of gender equality so it essentially piggybacked on the feminist movement.
So there you have it. Female crossdressing was just never considered a threat or a taboo and so was easily engineered into the feminist movement where it has become the society norm. Male crossdressing has none of these advantages. Where women had a hill to climb, men have a mountain. But luckily our society is far more progressive now largely in fact due to the success of the women's movement which deconstructed the female gender role so the mountain men face is crumbling before our eyes so it now resembles more the hill women faced.
Ohh that's an easy one... Because that's the way it is.. If there was a valid reason.. Then it could be changed.. But there isn't.
So, how many times has this question been asked here (I realise the OP is new and wouldn't know)?
I think we should all stamp our high heeled feet in childlike rage.
You never know - we may make the world change directionand all will be fair.
Mirani - [meer-rahn-nee] Beauty to Behold; to "See" beauty
I think Satrana basically hit the nail on the head here. I think we can sum it up in even just one reason: It's a patriarchal misogynistic society.
I'm also on board with everyone else who says if we don't like the way things are, it is our obligation to change it.
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~Riley
Check out my trans themed standup on YouTube!
My Tumblr Blog
So are there any societies that accept crossdressing?
[SIZE="2"]You're not confused -- you're just inquisitive (in a good way)...
Society is programmed this way, probably along the lines of a survival instinct, and it’s an obsolete way of thinking, if you ask me. You could make the case that crossdressing relieves stress, the end product of male insecurity, and a lot of wasted effort is expended in an effort to bolster one’s purported male identity. What I’m trying to say is that if you’re male, you’re expected to be male – any other existential variation cannot be right (read: queer), in the eyes of the unfortunate people who insist on polarized thinking. I think men fall back on what they know, and what they’ve been taught (you aren’t born with these concepts, IMHO), precluding any original thought about gender…
Very wise advice.
Michelle
Welcome to the hypocrisy of society. It's all over the place, knows no logic, knows no bounds. There's all sorts of these sorts of failures.
Here's another one; in central Asia, having teenage boys wear women's clothes and dance for an admiring all-male audience, and then being subjected to sexual abuse by their male masters is considered in those circles to be acceptable. Yet, teenage women performing the same dance? No, can't have that. That would be immoral. (lookup Dancing Boys of Afghanistan)
There's zillions of these inconsistencies.
Yay! Debs!!! How true is that. The majority who fear dressing are fearful for internal reasons. The "what if's"
One reason that we don't enjoy the same perks as Tom Boys is that in most of the cases of tomboys, they don't put a sexual note on it at an early age. There is a positive spin on being a tomboy, you can take them fishin', you can take them drinkin, you can go to NASCAR wit em, and then later they magically return to being "girls" and guys LIKE that.
Now, when you hear or see anything about Crossdressing men in media or when your buddies hang out together, CD's are wimps, sissies, "gay " guys out to recruit straight guys into the life style (makes you wonder what is so much better about gay sex over straight sex), who are also criminals and murderers ( I still await the newspaper article that says man in dress saves child from runaway train). And you know who perpetuates this??? MEN! With the exception of spouses (who should have been told from the start) most women don't give a dang what you wear. Who cares? You do, you are the main reason you can't be a male version of a tomboy.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
I think Lorileah hit it. We are the reason....us as men and males in the past. When we were growing up in middle and high school we all pointed fingers and had names for guys we thought were gay, sissy's or queers. It was considered wrong and not normal to be feminine. Well look at us now. And the shoe (high heel in most cases) is on the other foot!
Charlie
What do you think society's reaction would be to a gg that dressed in men's clothing,and sported a fake beard or mustache, and shoved a rolled up pair of socks down the front of her pants? I think that if you want to make the comparrison.. do it right.
Why? Because life is full of hypocrisy and always will be! I'm as hypocritical as the next, so if my recent pole of 1 person, me, is indicative of everyone and everything, it confirms my suspicions
[SIZE=4]I don't think this will ever be answered, at least in my remaining years.[/SIZE]
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[SIZE=4]When a girl wears a guys shirt it is called fashion[/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]When a guy wears a girls shirt he is called a faggot.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]What can you do? Sigh....[/SIZE]
I wonder if it is so straight forward as you think it is , we can only see it through our eyes so i wonder if it would be the same looking at it through the tomboys eyes.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Joanne
Typically the group holding the "political" power, like middle-age white males, is constrained to behave in their stereotypical ways. Violating these guidelines is not acceptable, and might get you excluded from that group.
Members of other groups are freer to explore a broader range of behaviors, especially any that mimic the group in power. But even if their behavior does not fit the stereotype of the group in power, that behavior is simply considered a distraction or amusement.
Some have. The one that comes to mind is that some native American tribes held the transgendered individual in very high regards, to the extent of having sacred positions for the two-spirit, and it being considered good luck to be married to one.So are there any societies that accept crossdressing?
Today, I'm gonna guess it's more to do with an overly insecure patriach society. Men are seen as strong, women as weak. Thus a woman acting like a man would be desirable, as they strive to emulate what is the standard for strenght. A man wanting to act like a woman though would be a "downgrade" of sorts, and undesirable.
I do think that more regular gender barriers will have to be torn down before the trans community as a whole can recieve more social tolerance though.
Men must be men not any thing else thats the way the world looks at us.
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