Well, I'm pretty new here but I have been a wife and I have read A LOT here...and over and over the same story...
the guy's wife accepted a certain amount, but then he still didn't trust her, still had to hide the other parts, so then we have the same kind of episode all over again the next time you have lied and hid stuff.
Honestly, I want to just shake some of you!!! It is the LYING, the DECEPTION, the HIDING stuff that really pisses us off, speaking for women in general here.
If you lie, hide, deceive, then we find out, we also know you didn't trust us with the real you, and that hurts. What else are you lieing? What else are you hiding? Do we really even know you like we thought we did???
when there is some time alone together, start by telling her, "I was afraid to tell you, But" or whatever your fear is...show your vulnerable side and let her be the women who loves you. It really makes me mad when I think about guys saying they love us and trust us so much...then they hide this really important ESSENTIAL part of themselves.
You WILL get caught. She will be mad... Stop the madness. Tell all.
The only thing that saved my Sweetie was figuring it out now...and he tried to tell me. But if I married him not knowing and came home and found him dressed as a girl?
Oh, let me tell you, it would be no fun and games mister and quite possibly no marriage. You have the whole other woman and/or gay baggage attached and the shock and surprise and that is NOT a good way to find out about something like that.
and yeah, I'm sweet and accepting and totally fine now, but I did not have the whole trauma of my SPOUSE, my PARTNER for LIFE having a secret hidden side that possibly meant he fooled around with boys or else other women..
I had a chance to calmly visit a website, read, ask questions, etc. That is totally different from a wife/girlfriend finding out by accident after years in a relationship.
Oh, and by the way, the last time I slept at my last boyfriends house and found a pair of ladies panties in the bedding, i did not assume they were his. Oh, wait, that's right, I never slept with him after finding those. Even though I was raising his children at my house. Hmmm, that was several years ago...maybe he was really a crossdresser... if he was and he wanted to tell me, I did not wait around long enough to find out. I am a jealous girl. And guess what, that's pretty much most of us women. (It really was a girl. But I did not know that at the time. I just assumed when I found panties.)
And next time I'll tell you what I really think.