When crossdressing is simply dressing

[Byllie]

Colloquially, GENDER does mean sex! Nothing else! Your gender is either male or female at birth. <snip>

Sex is based on your physical genitalia, and indirectly your genes. Gender is based on your self image and your behavior. The two are not the same.

And this demonstrates the issue I was raising in the beginning. For the none CD/TS/TG community, sex does equal gender. But for the rest of us it does not. We see that though sex is an either or condition, gender is not. Gender may be a continuum, or it may be an n-dimensional construct, but it most definitely not limited to two, polar genders.

In his book, "The Essential Difference: The Truth about the Male and Female Brain", Simon Baron-Cohen makes it clear that instead of male and females brains, there are male and female cognitive patterns that are not solely found in genetic males and females, respectively.

Rather, both men and women, genetically, have a combination of male and female mental attributes. What is true is that most men tend toward male patterns of thought, while most women tend towards female patterns of thought. But this distribution of maleness and femaleness for both sexes follows a bell curve distribution.

Therefore, a man can have a female brain, while a woman can have a male brain. Think sissy and tomboy, respectively.

And this discussion does not even touch upon sexual orientation which is another matter altogether.

[sissystephanie]

Byllie, I don't know where you are getting the definitions you are using, but they are incorrect! Gender refers only to the sex you were born with, unless that has been changed surgically. Writers can put any definition they want on words, but the historical original one is the only true correct one. That is the one I used. You have to give me a little credit, I was probably a CD before you were born! But I still know the English language very well!

Your reference to the brain related to a "sissy" and a "tomboy." Those two individuals are still, gender wise, a man and a woman!! Ask any reputable medical doctor!

You are comletely right about one thing. Sexual orientation is a totally different matter, which I have no desire to get into. Gender wise and sexually, I am a male!! But I sure do love the pretty feminine clothing!!

[ReineD]

Stephanie, sex and gender are two different things. There is much written about this on the internet if you want to do some research, but for now I found just a simple definition from the World Health Organization. This definition doesn't take transgendered into account in their examples, but you can fill in between the lines.

Simply put, "male" and "female" are sex categories, while "masculine" and "feminine" are gender categories.

Here's the link: http://www.who.int/gender/whatisgender/en/index.html

And also, there are volumes written on this if you just want to conduct a search. Please remember that although you have a firm handle on the fact that you are a male who crossdresses, there are others who feel differently than you do and their own definitions are just as valid for them as yours are for you.

[Joanne f]

I try to look at things from all angles and i feel that i have slightly different desires that would suit me for many reasons , i do not think that i have heard anyone say the type of thing that is in my head yet and for that reason i find it more close to call myself 3G (third gender) at least for now , i know it could mean many things but until you know where you can fit in (if anywhere) it will suit me .

[Gerrijerry]

NOW hear this girls. My daugther is a doctor who is doing research on Gender. So far she has told me the idea that there is only male and female is totally wrong. The range goes for what she calls male/male to female/ female. for example you can get a male/ female or a female/male or a male and female with both physical traits and it is so much information that I lost most of it. so many effects on the gender from before birth to after birth that saying anyone is a male or female just does not make sense. We have all heard that both have traits of the other. How much depends on so many variables. saying one is a CD gay lesbian trans etc is more what you received from your family tree then what many really believe is a choice. who in there right mind would chose to be different when you know that you will have others giving you a hard time the rest of your life.

[Satrana]

There is another important problem with the term crossdressing - it only covers MTFs. When a woman wears men's clothes neither she nor society consider that to be crossdressing. This is true even when the woman is deliberately choosing to wear male clothes for its gender effect.

Women with mild gender dsyphoria do not even consider themselves to be TG but instead use the known and acceptable label tomboy. We now have a society where the majority of women consider themselves to be tomboys but this is a mixture of mainstream women who have no TG feelings, classical tomboys who revel in men's culture and women with gender dsyphoria.

The problem is MTF CDs stick out like a sore thumb since without an apparent female equivalent, it makes us look like deviants with the resulting lack of understanding and empathy.

Our language is based on labels, people need them to make sense out of complex structures. However we in this community have the power to define ourselves and adopt our own labels which should be chosen to enhance society's understanding and empathy of who we are.

I personally take advantage of the ubiquitous nature and acceptance of the label tomboy and define myself as a tomgirl. I find that produces an instantaneous understanding of what I am without the need for further explanation.

Whether of not the label tomgirl is an accurate label is irrelevant in terms of my relationship with the public. We have to be more astute and differentiate satisfying public perception with our own need to accurately define ourselves. If I told people that I was a gender expressionist - while I might love that label myself - it would just leave blank expressions on faces and I would still have to spend the next 20 minutes explaining the label probably with little success!

[Byllie]

All I can say is ... WOW! This thread has more intense discussion into the matter of what gender is than I've seen in a long, long time. Thanks!