right now my biggest fears are losing my job , my neighbours finding out and think I am afraid that I will be even more alone.
right now my biggest fears are losing my job , my neighbours finding out and think I am afraid that I will be even more alone.
It's my voice. If someone asks me something I tend to give real quick answers.
Car breaking down, and I am too far from home to walk. Having to call a tow truck especially if its after a night out and its late, seems troubling to me.
my only fear is my wife beating me home... and the fight that will ensue if nikki enters the house
Nikkijo I am right there with ya on that one I'd hate to think of her seeing Staci, My biggest moments of anxiety are when I see men in groups and I am read, (thats not too hard) I don't fear the laughing I do however get angry and want to run and hide like I have no right to wear what I please. Once I get it through my wig I do have that right I think I will be better off.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension: a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into... the Girly Zone.
[url]http://www.facebook.com/Staci Grace
Not much fear anymore. I know I am read sometimes put passing is no longer important to me. It is the fun and the interaction with others that I enjoy. I try to be polite, smile, and dress properly. I have never had a negative encounter.
Diana
I was never sure I was not going to deck some wise guy.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
My only one right now is running into my boss. I'm not out at work yet and that would be a weird conversation in the middle of a store. In my case its completely unlikely though as I live in a different town than I work.
Have fun and enjoy life.
Skye
I'm lucky I suppose insomuch as I don't have any deisre to 'pass', which I wouldn't anyway, in what is best described as your normal everyday social context I would only consider going out dressed in a safe and suitable context where dressing up is ok, otherwise it would just lead to hassle..Especially where I live.
Last edited by tanya1976; 04-29-2010 at 09:28 AM.
#1 fear is being recognized
#2 fear is being clocked in an unkind way
A lot of people fear being recognized as a 'guy in a dress'. You can get over that fear by going to Walmart on a Saturday. There are A LOT of women who look like guys impersonating women!
I think my biggest fears of going out crossdressing are running into people I know, like from my church. I'm not afraid of being seen by people I don't know but I am afraid of strangers coming up to me and start talking to me and what the heck I am going to say other than just politely say hello, be shy and brush them off I suppose but open to listen should they have anything positive to say. This community is pretty accepting, especially the part of town I live in.
It's odd too that I'm not afraid of being seen by neighbors even though some already have. It's more fear of them telling my wife about me, even if it's just casual conversation or accidental.
Fear is always a problem and something I need to work on, yesiree....
Do you mean Stacy by all the women who go there wearing t-shirts and jeans, etc... very casual and not dressed up?Originally Posted by StacyCD
I'm afraid i'm going to run into someone I know, whether a friend, coworker, family member, friend of a friend, etc. I live in NYC and I know alot of people believe its tough to run into someone you know in a city of this size, but this city is alot smaller than people think. There have been countless times I've crossed paths with someone I know at the most random times and places, not en femme of course. Maybe I just have bad luck, but situations like this definetly stir fear in me to venture out as a gurl.
Mimi Lee
I just thought I'd share my experience on the probability of being recognized. I have on several occasions, when dressed as Wendy, interacted with people who know me as a male. Not one ever recognized me. People I know well have walked right by me or even talked to people I'm with, completely clueless. The only things that have given away my male identity are using my normal male voice, and walking around arm-in-arm with my wife. If she's with me that provides enough context for people to put two and two together. So I no longer worry so much about being recognized.
I know I don't pass, but I've been able to use some peoples inattention to wander around unnoticed when I've been in other cities. Even if I'm read on those occasions there are a few things that bother me and fewer that worry me. However when I get back home things change and I dress only at home, at my support group meetings and sometimes on the way home from those meetings.
It's not my fears that keep me from going out from home, but those of my wife. She doesn't want her elderly parents or our grandkids to have to try and wrap their minds around the concept of my crossdressing. It used to be that I worked with a bunch of very conservative folks, but since I retired that's no longer a concern.
Sarah
Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.
The worry comes from growing up in a time when there was very little, if any, tolerance towards anything that had not been quantified/defined within a given set of parameters cramed into us from birth.
To put them in some order.
Being read by someone i know well.
" " " a GG who could get vocal and mean about it.
" " " anyone who might cause a scene.
Then the vocal aspect.
The reason i mention the part about being caught by real females is that i think i could walk away from ridicule by males and not feel particularly bothered, but i was lambasted by a GG in the lingerie section of a store once (in drab) and it was very phsycologically painful. Made be remember the way i felt when my i confessed to my ex. mj (Cassie)
My male self has admitted to being a control freak. Ok, he controls it pretty well, but there is no way he would let me out in public view without being sure that I was in control of any perceived eventuality. He is always well-prepared and he needs me to be that way to be comfortable. Like many of you, I have ticked off the list of issues to be overcome in order to feel in control and that, in itself, has felt really good and positive! This topic does focus on what I do and who I am, so it's a great way to move forward asap!
tina
Don't want to here "Hey look at that guy in a dress"!!!!
My initial fear is on leaving the house in broad daylight. My next door neighbor is retired, so they are often at home, they know my car and that I'm the one who drives it, and they know my wife and what she looks like. Watching an unfamiliar woman leaving my home in my car either brings up a question of who that woman is, or leads them to the conclusion that the guy next door likes to parade around as a woman.
Once away from the house, things get easier for me. I don't want to be read, although I'm sure that'll happen. But I really don't let it bother me much. But all the usual small and petty fears of the unknown, like the car breaking down, or getting pulled over, or running into a pack of rednecks looking for trouble (hey, let's beat up the fairy!) stay with me in the back of my mind as well.
Other than that, I generally like it when I manage to get out.
Any money found in the laundry is MINE!
"This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"
www.flickr.com/photos/tgmarla/
Are you certain you would not pass? I have just looked at you pictures, your gorgeous.
SUZY
Five 0clock shadow, adams apple, large hands, prehistoric jawline.
In my home town anyway, lol. Fear doesn't keep me home, it's not having something nice to wear, lol, now with warmer weather.
My biggest and maybe my only fear anymore is being recognized by someone I work with.
I may someday just move and go full time.
(if I could find a way to make a living)
-Misty
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