Managing "conflict"..Is there a differance when "dressed?"

[Deborah Jane]

Do you find yourself reacting to potential conflict differantly when in "girl!" mode, to the way you would in "guy" mode?

For example, if somebody started acting aggressively to you, would you deal with it in exactly the same way, no matter how you were dressed or would you deal with it differantly?

I have found myself, that as a guy I will "front up" most situations, while if I'm "dressed", I feel more inclined to try to avoid them.

How about you?

[Midnight Skye]

Uh yeah no. This is something I worry about if I go full time As a guy my posture, expresions and movement make others feel as if I'm in control. People view me as an authority and a leader. You wouldn't believe the number of times as a guy people would walk up to me and start asking me questions about the store I'm in (lmao). But this makes conflict much easier as people will general just follow my lead... or back down. Which is funny because I'm a really small guy... I'm not physically intimidating.

As a female... I don't know how long it will be till I get everything combined right to be like this again. My confidence has still been very high and I'm still a happy approachable person. Actually people approach and talk to me much more often as a female. But still around large men I always keep in the back of my mind that I can outrun 99.9% of the population... minus when my heels strap on...

[gabimartini]

I'd probably react differently, too. However, I think that's due to the fact that I don't want to draw attention to myself, rather than feminine behavior.

[mapletree]

interesting question/comment...
i think the easy comment is as i get older i just avoid conflict better because i know how to make better constructive comments ( i hope)
Also I am much quieter in my female personality and I am not sure really why

[carolinoakland]

well, HRT is a big factor for me now. I find that I am calmer and can deal with confrontations better than I ever have. Being a girl all the time is..... beyond words. sigh. Carol

[5150 Girl]

As a rule I tend to shy away from most conflict in either mode. Especaily physical conflict.
However, I do tend to be more confident about most situations when dressed. Some actually think I'm a bit of a bitch actually... But I think it's just cause they're not used to me speaking my mind as much

[Naomi Rayne]

I am an extremely logical person. Brains over brawn. So i think my feminine personality and my male personality are incredibly similar. The only thing i would say changes is when im fem my mind works more like a chess master. Im always trying to think ahead just in case i end up in a bad situation because it would not be fun to have to run in heels or be caught underdressing by someone who does not know.

[LisaAlexander]

I'm more at ease when dressed, so I actually feel I'm more in control, it probably wont help me in a fight or something like that but I actually found out that I fare better doing things like baking and playing the piano. I guess in the moment of conflict, as a guy I avoid anyway, but as a girl, I'd be "shrinking" less, I'd just care less

[aggi123]

I would probably handle both situations the same. Fall down, roll into a ball, and cry for help. lol

[Freddy12]

I absolutely try harder to avoid conflict when I'm Freddy. I guess in part I'm concerned about calling to much attention to the fact that I'm a crossdresser. I know that some folks react negatively to that fact, and would automatically be against any position I might take.

[anouk]

I try to prevent such situations as both modes. However I feel a slight difference in my reactions when I have to solve more peaceful everyday problems. I sort of regard other people's feelings more in girl mode and won't be so rational.

[MargaretJ]

Same as you Deborah Jane. I am short tempered, and don't handle conflict diplomatically when I'm a Mr, but avoid conflict and confrontation when en femme. Wearing heels has a lot to do with it.

[AllieSF]

Since I am a small person to begin with, my desire growing up was to always wanting to be taller. I have also always taken a pragmatic attitude regarding confrontations. Depending on how threatened (how big and mean was the other guy) or not I feel and the specific issue involved, I may answer back or just decide this is not a worthy battle, nor worth my effort. When I started dressing and would be out driving, I decided to make a conscious effort to tone down my somewhat aggressive driving ways to fit in more to the way I was presenting myself. Now, I find that even though I still have my male character, I have toned it down some in a lot of different ways, not just how I drive.

[Jilmac]

I've always been a pacifist, so no matter how I'm dressed, if confronted by an aggressor I would try to avoid confrontation at all cost.

[Bree]

I don't think it makes much of a difference for me. I am non-confrontational either way.

[Kate Simmons]

Actually I'm more diplomatic in guy mode. As Denise I'm more apt to fire from the hip first and ask questions later.

[Loni]

i always try to avoid any kind of trouble ....but if someone starts a fight with me no matter how i am dressed.. i may not win but i will get in a couple good hits.

hay long nails can inflect some great damage.

but as the first line states.....


.

[charlie]

Hello Deborah!
I'm me in both situations. Girl or guy I will be just as manipulative or imparting knowledge. I'm just not an in your face sort of person.

[AKAMichelle]

I had to think about my response. At first I thought I would be the same in either case, but upon more thought I think I too would be up in their face in male mode and back off en femme.

The more I think about this the stranger this feels to me. It is almost like I have 2 personalities each on opposite ends of the spectrum.

[Deborah Jane]

It is almost like I have 2 personalities each on opposite ends of the spectrum.

That's just the way I feel sometimes.
As a guy I'm very confident, sure of myself and willing to put my point across regardless of the consequenses. While in "girl" mode I lack a lot of the confidence and really don't want to draw attention to myself.
I do wonder though, as time goes on and I spend more time "en femme", will my confidence grow to the point, where, as a "girl" I will be just confident [albeit in differant ways] as I am as a guy?