Saturday night

[Jamsey]

Sitting here, Saturday night, just by myself, all dressed up.

Have long wig on, a pretty black and white dotted summer dress, black patent pumps, thigh high stockings and a brand new strapless pushup black bra. Going to put on my favorite blue dress, along with my boobies, and some nasty high heels.

Have make up on, not good at it, and bright red lipstick.

Just walked outside for a while to practice walking. Very quiet in the neighborhood, nobody about. I am not out.

An emptiness in my life because I really want to go out and have some fun. The only time, other than Halloween, I went dressed was to the OUT nightclub here in Madison WI. But they opened at the wrong time, and never came close to making it. I did have a fun night, dancing and a few drinks.

I have no problem buying clothes, I have a great wardrobe, classic and vintage, current fashions, but I really don't have the nerve to go to any clubs and I don't have any crossdressing friends.

Sorry to vent but just bummed.

I'm envious of the crossdressers who are able to pass and go out. Maybe, for me, sometime in the future.

[MrKunk]

I am sorry this is hard on you, I know what it is like to have this secret, I sympothize
with you,

[Freddy12]

Walking around the neighborhood is a wonderful step. Another step would be to drive to get gas. Could be in a 24hr station where you use the pay at the pump option. The first time you realize that someone can see you, but did not notice that you're not a GG, you will be encouraged. Take heart! It's thrilling to get out in public!

[pernille d]

i agree with freddy , getting gas is a good idea . get confidence and get out ther girl. you will love it ,
aa
( i too have alarge wardrobe but like in quiet denmark in the country so there is nothing for us her not really even any clubs to go to as its a quiet land , so when i read about all you that have the chance to go to clubs i feel a bit sad , )

[Ashley S]

I definitely sympathize with the OP as well. I live in a small apartment building, and the neighbours don't know I dress, so I can't even go get something out of my vehicle, or check the mail or anything.

It sucks. I know what you mean.

[MargaretJ]

I know how you feel Jamesy, I got all femmed up last night and nowhere to go. My problem is getting out of the house en femme. In the winter when it is dark earlier, I can get en femme and cover up to get out to my car, but in the summer when it is lighter, this isn't an option. It is such a downer getting all femmed up, only to be unable to get out. I haven't shaved my legs for 3 weeks now, thats how bad it is

[pernille d]

i think we all get "bummed" with this problem or similar problems , i live in the country (so no neigbours to hide from ) my problem is getting out of the house when my two teenagers are home,

luckliy i have a 1km drive where at one end dad leaves home and it is pernille that drives out on to the main road , its still not easy though and i am just like you other girls as i have nowhere to go once out (+ my make up just looks crap as sometimes i have to do it in the car ) .

one thing i have noticed is people from a distance notice clothing more than faces , so in my old house in the town i used to get dressed , take off my wig and pull my dress up under my coat and put on a pair sweat pants over my nylon legs. ( then its simple off with the sweat pants pull down the dress on with the wig, fem coat and shoes and off you go )

[AKAMichelle]

There are a lot of others crossdressers who would love to include in their activities, but we don't know what part of the country you live in. Let us know where you live and I bet you there a crossdresser friend waiting for you.

Going solo is fine, but every once in awhile you need another trouble maker. You can also do a member search on this forum for people in your area. Send them a private message or email and let them you exist and see they want to go out somewhere together.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Check out this group 54 miles from you.


http://www.meetup.com/Spectrum-of-Rockford-GLBTQ/

[Kathi Lake]

Jamsey, I don't pass, and yet I still go out. You can do it too.

Kathi

[suzypier]

Join a support group, you won't be sorry ! I did it last February and I am sorry I did not do it much sooner. Now i could go out for dinner with other CD and enjoyed being out en femme. Suzanne

[t-girlxsophie]

we have all been where you are you dont have to pass to live your life to the fullest.best idea is go on the net and find a meeting near you.You could always attend first meeting in drab till you feel more at ease.I hope you find the right path for you to get out there and have the most fun possible,good luck Sophie

[kristinacd55]

I hear ya, although the other night I finally got the nerve to go for a drive. No gas on that trip though, but it felt liberating!!

[suchacutie]

Such as...

I have a membership in one of the international hotel chains. When I travel to professional meetings I stay in that hotel and build up points. Since there may be more people in our house for an extended time, my wife suggested I use some of those points to get a room for Tina! This lets us get out of the house with a small overnight bag (or a plastic bag, if necessary) and then use the hotel room as the base of operations (in whatever city you might like!)

Just a thought.

tina

[Jamsey]

Thank you all for your kind words, understanding, suggestions, sympathy, empathy and support. There are other things in my life right now that prevent me from enjoying a CD life. I hoping that will change soon. I would love to go to Diva Las Vegas, which is one of my goals.

Anyway, since I was bummed I did what any girl would do, I went shopping!!!
Blew my whole CD budget and more. Went to Pennys first, had some good coupons. Picked up 3 really nice lace top panties, and 3 bras, matching colors, of course.

Then went to my favorite vintage/classic store. Tried on over 50 outfits and combinations, some were drop dead gorgeous. But, though they looked great, they didn't fit in my chest area. Bummed again. Though I did pick-up 3 skirts, a couple tops, one a multi-color flora top that I can't where a bra with, but goes perfectly with say a demin skirt. Also a little black dress, and a stunning lilac, with multi color sparklies, with jacket. Gorgeous.

Alas, the store is closing. That store is where I started my active CD experience, and have accumulated a very nice wardrobe. Bummed again. I will miss the owner more than I can say.

Thanks again to everyone.