How does one stop crossdressing ?

[flogo920]

After wondering for years why this particular behavior has persisted through most of my life, and wondering how to modify/control/compartmentalise/cease this, an answer has emerged.

Family, career and finances are critical. When those make demands that exceed 115% of one's waking hours, crossdressing goes like any other committed hobby.

I say I used to crossdress, with the same sadness I say I used to scuba dive, mountain climb, and do serious photography. Trying to consciously quit when time permits one to crossdress is quite impossible without excessive psychological stress. However some priorities displace it.

Flo

[carrie-ann]

Go full time that's how i stopped wearing male clothes then you don't have them problems no more.

[Samantha B L]

I'm sorry it has to be this way for you,Flo. You sound reluctant about it all.
Maybe your circumstances will be different in 2 or 3 years.



Good Luck in the Future, Samantha

[Jonianne]

If the desire to be like females is a part of who you are, then you can always integrate it into your ordinary life in your own personal way. I rarely fully dress anyway (too hot and too much work!) and just enjoy the special things I do that help me identify with females.

[carhill2mn]

Yes, "life" very frequently gets in the way of crossdressing. A person has to make choices about what actions one will take. The desire to CD will probably never go away entirely.

[sterling12]

Maybe so? But, you are on here formulating questions and participating. Perhaps that's a substitute?

I think as time goes by, you will find ways to "sneak in" some activity. It may not be a total satisfaction, and it's probably not what you want, but I think you will still do it. You see, I don't believe its like a Photography "Hobby." I think most of us are compelled to "release" our femme selves. If we don't, we put ourselves in grave mental peril! You might be able to abstain for a while, even a long while...but, anecdotal accounts around here always claim the same thing: "Pressure builds up, and something pops!"

For whatever reasons, our "Gift" seems to trump just about anything....so, we shall see, won't we?

Peace and Love, Joanie

[monalisa]

Just have to go cold turkey. Give everything feminine away and live unhappily ever after but secure.

[Emma England]

Well, some hobbies do take a lot of time.

But you have to be dressed regardless of how busy you are, so you might as well wear clothes that you like.

[pernille d]

Just have to go cold turkey. Give everything feminine away and live unhappily ever after but secure.

like the humor of your reply , but unfortunatly i think there is too much truth in waht you say to

the title of the thread "how does one stop crossdressing " , answer = you cant. so there has to be space for it

[lavistaa62]

We've all felt the stress that comes from being denied an opportunity to express ourselves when other activities; like say working on a house, cleaning or doing other chores demand too much of our time. CD as an activity does take up a lot of time but if you're not particularly worried about how you would look to the outside world CD can actually save time and improve your mood and comfort. You all know where it is going now I bet....

It's been REALLY hot here in New England and I've been stuck at the pointy top of a gutted "ell" putting in wiring. While at the top of a 10' ladder in 110 degree heat it struck me that it would be a lot more comfortable in a light and airy dress. Thus was the inspiration for Construction Katie who now is much more productive and happier doing her chores. Being covered in dirt and bruises doesn't mean you can't feel fem or happy.

[Ria]

I Know how you feel, for me dressing is private, I have no interest in doing it full time involving others, particularly my young family.

I find time to CD in the early mornings when planning my day. I'm self employed and have a home office (with a lock on the door). I'm working and dressed, it's very nice.

Can you set your life up in some way that allows you a frequent outlet whilst you get something else done like desk work or planning etc?

[Cheryl T]

For me I think the answer is I'll stop when I die...not that I want to do either...

[Sarah Doepner]

When lifes demands make it hard to find time to crossdress, that may or may not be a problem. It really depends on if you accept your dressing as integral to your personality or feel that it's just something you do for kicks. It depends on if you feel you need to do this or not and then how you feel about that "need". Is it something that is necessary to keep your life in balance or is it something that feels like an unwanted addiction? Each of us has to sort through these, and many other, decisions as we address our crossdressing.

The real worry comes when crossdressing's demands make it hard to meet life's obligations. Be sure you are asking the right questions and have a good handle on realistic priorities, unfiltered by a notorious pink fog.

[Nikki A.]

Once bitten, I think death is the only cure. Lets face it, it's part of who we are.

[anonymousinmaryland]

Monalisa and Nikki seems to have it all covered. Can't imagine unloading all my unmentionables. Geez. Good luck in making the right choice.

[Rianna Humble]

I think there are two possible ways to stop cross-dressing, one of which holds positively more prospects than the other. I considered both and opted for number 2.

The two ways I know you can stop cross-dressing:

1 Suicide

2 Transition

[Lynn Marie]

[SIZE="3"]I pretty much see my own crossdressing the same way Flo does, as a "committed hobby". I've had a number of hobbies in my lifetime and a couple of them I've returned to with the same "committment" and passion that I had the first time. I'm passionate about any hobby that I'm currently pursuing. To me that's the whole essence of having a hobby. I pour lots of time and energy and money into my hobbies. Always have and always will. I don't like to do anything halfway.

When my family got in the way of my hobby 25 years ago, I let my hobby go. I returned to it many years later, but it just wasn't the same and I let it go again. There are still some things I'd like to do in that hobby, but it's over and that's just the way it is. I miss lots of things that I was once so actively involved in, but you just let it go. Here's a brief rundown of my hobbies in the last 60 years. U Control Model Airplanes, Model Boats, Guns, Motorcycles, Corvettes, Skydiving, Scuba Diving, Aviation, Slot Cars, CB Radios, Cameras and Photography, Tennis, Bicycles, RC Model Airplanes, Power Boats, Sport Kites, and back to guns again, handguns in particular. In a number of the hobbies I've competed on a pretty high level.

So after making a long reply longer, I wish you the best Flo. Put it away and fulfill your commitments to your home and job and family. Maybe someday you'll come back to it and maybe not. Either way, it's just life.[/SIZE]

[Fab Karen]

How does one make a leopard change its spots?

[Jaclyn NM]

I know what you mean, but now that I'm retired, I find that I crossdress to one extent or an other almost daily, and it is delightful.

[minalost]

After wondering for years why this particular behavior has persisted through most of my life, and wondering how to modify/control/compartmentalise/cease this, an answer has emerged.

Family, career and finances are critical. When those make demands that exceed 115% of one's waking hours, crossdressing goes like any other committed hobby.

I say I used to crossdress, with the same sadness I say I used to scuba dive, mountain climb, and do serious photography. Trying to consciously quit when time permits one to crossdress is quite impossible without excessive psychological stress. However some priorities displace it.

Flo

The same thing happened to me in my late 40s. Kids got too old, too much time at work, too many other hobbies. Now that I'm almost an empty nester it has become easier to CD again. Sometimes you just have to put things on hold. But what ever you do, DON'T PURGE! Keep your stuff, even if it's packed away. You'll want it again... believe me!

[Kaz]

I went through several stages of my life, I bought stuff, then purged... and it always came back. Maybe for some us here it is a hobby, but for many it is part of who they are. In more recent years if I reach stages when I can't get into as much as I want, instead of giving it up I bring it inside. Kaz is always part of me. Sometimes she just has to wear men's clothes for extended periods and try to pass!

[lisajane]

Suicide!

[patti.jean]

The only thing that even came close for me was a dedicated regiment of meditation. This also took a considerable amount of time 30 minutes to an hour a day at least. But in the end my desires caved in and I am now accepting of who I am. But during my “meditation period” I did almost stop for two years.

[Megan70]

Once bitten, I think death is the only cure. Lets face it, it's part of who we are.

Suicide!

These comments are not even close to being funny and do not belong here. Do you realize that over the years perhaps thousands of transvestites, transsexuals, transgendered people have indeed killed themselves because they were so tormented that that was their only way out.
We just don't hear about those silent cry for help deaths.
Shame.

[jenifer m.]

i gave up trying to quit.now i just enjoy the two sides of my personality,and am enjoying life more than ever befor.ive found that when i came out to mostly everybody i know,and had good results,i decided that there would be no more closet for me any more.my life is twice as interesting as it was when i held back.i say just let yourself go.live a little befor its too late.