Confused about where I am.

[Hippoeater]

Hey everybody!

I just need to talk and I don't have many people that I can talk about this with. I figured I'd come here!

So, I just got out of a relationship with a girl who was completely accepting of who I am and what I do. She never questioned it but truly accepted that it was a part of me and that it made me happy. Ultimately she ended up being pretty crazy and obsessive...so it didn't work out to well in the end.

When she was around I definitely got a lot braver in my crossdressing and femininity. I would wear some light makeup when we went out, I would wear some of my coach jewelry when we went shopping or on dates. We went out dressed together a couple of times after awhile and I would let her dress me at home and I would even just be dressed whenever she came over later on in the relationship.

She made me feel so comfortable and so confident that I'm having a hard time adjusting to anything less now that she isn't around.

It feels like the right thing in my life and the direction I want to go...but it's one of those things where I don't quite know what the next step is for me and how I am going to get there.

I guess it just makes it harder when you have no one to lean on and give you that support we sometimes need.

[debbeelee1]

Supporting each other is a big part of this forum! Hang in there and don't get discouraged!

[Kathi Lake]

Sorry she turned out to be a crazy one. As I told my son when he started dating, "Dating a psycho is fun - for a little while."

There will be others. Whether or not they accept all of you remains to be seen. Be truthful at the outset of the relationship and you do have a better chance.

Kathi

[abigail43]

I say just keep doing what is comfortable for you, if you want to be dressed all the time and that feels comfortable then why not ,as for where to go next just relax and live in the now for we don't know if we will have a tomorrow so just enjoy your today

[eluuzion]

Well, it's a small world"...

until you start trying to find somebody to share it with, eh?

In the CD world, sometimes the only support we can find is in our pantyhose...

Being "alone" is kinda' like learning to walk in 5" pumps...a little scary at first, but it turns out to be lots of fun once you get used to it . (as with most things, it helps if you "keep your chin up")

It is possible to be "alone" without being "lonely".

[Imogen_Mann]

Sorry she turned out to be a crazy one. As I told my son when he started dating, "Dating a psycho is fun - for a little while."

Kathi

Gonna say that to my brother... Oh yes.

Great quote Kathi.

On topic now, Yes it's hard to be single suddenly. I was in a quasi accepting relationship for ten years, and I found after the initial drop off, I started to use the confidence I had gained to my advantage as a single girl. I was soon able to shop for my clothes without embarrasment, I was much better with makeup and my dress sense had improved.

I think if the relationship I am in now ended, things would be even better as my current partner is very accepting and has really given me a lot more confidence.

Bottom line is, don't worry... Things can, and often do get better, and yeah... We are here for eachother on the forum so don't keep things in, either post them on the forum or Pvt message your friends here

[PretzelGirl]

I guess it just makes it harder when you have no one to lean on and give you that support we sometimes need.

Well first, you always have us. Hang around, ask your questions, and support is plentiful. You can also look in your area for support groups. Tri-Ess is a national organization and there are groups all over. There are many other support groups that locally based. All are probably good as you would get the support and acceptance you want.

But if it feels right, then it probably is right. Don't let the break-up send you backwards. If you were heading down a path that made you comfortable and you enjoyed, you can continue it. The road isn't always easy for the members here, and that is why we share our experiences. Best of luck to you!

As I told my son when he started dating, "Dating a psycho is fun - for a little while."

Well, that describes my first marraige.

[carolinoakland]

well, it sounds like the external validation allowed you to accept your dressing or femme side. this should tell you something. the next step is this... Does dressing make you happy? If it does then you can give yourself permission to be happy, because you my friend... are the only one who ever can. Enjoy. Carol

[DonnaT]

It feels like the right thing in my life and the direction I want to go...but it's one of those things where I don't quite know what the next step is for me and how I am going to get there.

Depends on what "it" is!

To be more open and outgoing as a CD, or to move towards a 24/7 type of commitment.

If it's the 24/7 commitment, then the next step would be to see a therapist.

[kimdl93]

I have to congratulate you on having the courage to walk away from a supportive, but emotionally challenged SO (was that politically correct, or what!) You gained a lot to be grateful for - and know from experience that there are accepting supportive GGs out there. Just be patient and keep doin what you've been doing!