Would a transman ever consider a CDr as a partner

[ShirleyO]

Hi Guys,
Well I was just wondering. Would a transman ever consider a male to female CDr for a partner. I think the trans men would be wonderful at fullfilling the masculing role in a relationship where by the CDr would fullfill the feminin role. I have aften thought of a wonderful relationship between two people where that would work. I hope I haven't offended anyone but I always wonder. Mainly because I don't have the guts to fully transition myself and maybe there would be a transman that would not be quit there yet either. It is very hard for a CDr to find an understanding GG so maybe a transman would be more understanding. Any thoughts gentleman?

[Ze]

I believe any identity can end up with any other identity. All it takes is understanding and communication. Oh, and liking the other person. I guess that's kinda important...

Most FtMs are TS and not "just" a CD, but yes, there are probably some that haven't reached a TS point yet. Some may also be involved with partners before one or the other has come out.

Personally, I could see myself dating an MtF TS, but not an MtF CD. Why? Simply, I'm attracted to women. I understand MtF CDs are women at least part-time, but I still would want a full-time lady because, well, that's what I'm attracted to. I could still be good friends with an MtF CD, but romance probably wouldn't happen. I'm also not necessarily interested in stereotypically masculine roles if I don't do them naturally. I just am who I am. Being around somebody femme won't really change that.

However, there are many pan/bisexual FtMs and also ones attracted to men. I'd assume enough wouldn't mind a CDing male partner.

[WalT]

Why not? I'm an FtM dating an MtF. I don't really care so much about gender identity, gender expression, etc. A person's mind and personality are soooooooooooooooooo much more important to me than what gender they identify as, how they express their gender, what their plumbing is, etc. If I find them attractive, they're attractive.

[patricia 402]

just my opinion.
but if two humanbeings fall in love what else matters.

[mistunderstood]

When I started out I felt I was a lesbian. But now I am TG I find I am more Bi-sexual. I want different things in my relation ship with women than what I want from men.
Yes I would date a CD'er if we hit it off.

[Kaden]

Depends entirely on sexual identity imo. Anyone who is totally attracted to either males or females would probably not be the ideal match for a MtF CD, anyone who is more flexible/fluid in their sexual attraction would be great potential for you.

Personally I'm more attracted to men so in the long term if you were going to transition, or identified as TS, then attraction may be an issue for me, otherwise dating a CD MtF isn't something I'd rule out. It'd be pretty individual.

[Andy66]

Sure, why not? As long as our personalities are compatible.

[AnonyMouse]

just my opinion.
but if two humanbeings fall in love what else matters.

Curiosity, dear Patricia.

Being into both dudes and chicks, I'd be totally up for it... especially in bed.

[Dalece]

If a Transman would ask me out I would accept the offer. He is the male I'm the female. And if things clicked then things happen well you know the old chemitry thing. But do go out on a date yes I would. I would fell very honored Oh I hope Kerion sees this.

[hopingsecret]

It was one of the discovery channels, not sure if it was Discovery proper, Discovery health, or TLC where a pre-op MTF and FTM met, fell in love and had a child together before their respective srs's. So love springs eternal.

[Mi$$ Despair]

HI Ze

But I would date anyone given the chance but someone would have to ask me first. *Goes back to the corner and pouts*

[Kieron Andrew]

i could never consider dating a CD'er, as i am not attracted to men at all, and CD'er ID as men at least part of the time, i have dating transitioning MtFs and would consider it again if i wasn't already engaged, but only if the MtF was transitioning

[Elsa Larson]

Check out the film, Southern Comfort on LogoTV in 10 episodes.
It follows FtM TS Robert Eads and includes several segments about his relationship with MtF CD Lola.

http://www.logotv.com/video/misc/127...tml?id=1600437

I had trouble viewing it with Opera browser. It runs fine with Safari browser.

[DeniseNY]

i could never consider dating a CD'er, as i am not attracted to men at all

That's a shame, bcos you're kinda hot...

[Kieron Andrew]

That's a shame, bcos you're kinda hot...

and very unavailable.

[DanteDonovan]

I thought I'd reply to this thread because I can see I will offer a few other aspects

First, as long as two people love each other, it will not matter the gender-is not always true. It's why such things as gay, lesbian,(we're omitting bi because obviously they don't have preference to a certain extent). But with this I just want to remind, that I know we all want to be openly accepted on who we are and that people shouldn't just judge by gender, but in this respect, don't be so lost in it that you might get offended by someone not wanting to be with you because you weren't genetically born as the preferred gender. Doesn't mean they don't like you, just that they aren't your soul mate

I did have a relationship with a girl, before it turned she was a liar and crazy etc, things were going good-we got along great. I was thinking, "yay I found someone to be with" but before the negative popped in, I found that in the back of my head I was still starting to drift back to thinking about guys, being with a guy, and all her sweetness in the world couldn't change that fact. So, for things like this, some times it's more than just emotional feelings that keep a relationship going. But it just really depends on the individual.

As for me, I prefer my men, in fact love them when they dress awesome fashion and got the eyeliner/shadow, hairspray-all that crap. But I wouldn't want to be with an FTM.(will explain after this) I wouldn't go for a CD'er(will explain),

Maybe it's because it's something I can relate to. As where being FTM, I love to snazz myself up when going somewhere good, or sometimes just because I can, have the make-up, sometimes even get my wigs on. I know through and through that I am a man, but I also know that I do have that feminine streak in me and it's one I'm ok with. Prob because being an artist and fashion love, as well as dressing up is fun as hell. So I'm the gay dude that hops around in fashion, and will love shopping with anyone, guy or girl, doesn't mind, in fact wants a partner who's into the same thing, but still a guy.

Now, this is not to say at ALL that in the back of my head I still view an FTM as female, but as a general fact,(we all want to be seen as male) but most dress male, act male, and for all intents and purposes, want to be seen completely as that, no feminism at all. I understand and respect this, but it's just not my thing. Same with gender males, that type doesn't attract me. Now, if I came across an FTM who loved to wear makeup on occasion when going out and shop together, I'd be all down for that. As with CD'ers-from my experience, a lot don't do it full time. If they did do it full time, then I'd sidle over their way and happily chill with you while getting your nails done. Hell, help you on what design to pick for them ^_~

So, what it boils down to is, I like feminine men, but not men trying to behave as female. Mannerisms, voice, etc.

So, me being FTM, that's how it works for me. So, thought I'd bring some other things to the table.

[Areyan]

i don't mind a feminine man but a mtf cder is not quite the same to me as an androgynous male. i think i am attracted to some feminine looking men for probably strange, erm self-fascination reasons, lol, and i have had relationships with them in the past.

on the TG scale i'd say i'd be more likely to date a mtf ts only if she is transitioning also - pre-op would be fine, but not a cder.
and i would say other t-guys aren't too bad either, though this is pure speculation for me at this point, lol.

[AnonyMouse]

Now, this is not to say at ALL that in the back of my head I still view an FTM as female, but as a general fact,(we all want to be seen as male) but most dress male, act male, and for all intents and purposes, want to be seen completely as that, no feminism at all. I understand and respect this, but it's just not my thing. Same with gender males, that type doesn't attract me. Now, if I cam across an FTM who loved to wear makeup on occasion when going out and shop together, I'd be all down for that.

I'm your man! I'm totally up for yon gender transgression as long as I'm still a dude at the end of the day. (And as long as I say how far it goes and for how long - there's sometimes a fine line between good fun and traumatic experience.)

[cdsara88]

this post reminds me that i need to journal my 2nd time out (about a month ago)..went to a gay bar called Temptations (owner called it a gay bar, not me). I sat by myself for a few minutes, a creepster old guy down the bar bought me a drink, and eventually I was tired of watching ESPN and sitting there by myself so I asked a lesbian GG sitting close to me if I could sit with her instead. We talked all night, she let me win some games of pool, and what would have otherwise been a disappointment was a great night for me. She wasn't presenting as a male at all...guy jeans, short hair, but def not FtM..

anyway, for several reasons we left separately but there was some definite chemsitry! I'm really skinny and people tend to judge me as the 'sub' but that's not how I identify psychologically. To my surprise, that was how things clicked between us, I was def in the 'fem' role because it felt more natural. ..I'm sharing this so that you know that on at least one occasion it was...very workable

[nehapriya]

would u mind being my boyfrnd

[DanteDonovan]

I'm your man! I'm totally up for yon gender transgression as long as I'm still a dude at the end of the day. (And as long as I say how far it goes and for how long - there's sometimes a fine line between good fun and traumatic experience.)

Haha niiice XD So what would you consider the area of getting to be a traumatic experience? XD

[AnonyMouse]

Haha niiice XD So what would you consider the area of getting to be a traumatic experience? XD

It would probably depend on the individual situation. Some factors would include amount of time, style of clothing, and... er, "completeness" of role.

[Lucy_Bella]

Gone

[DanteDonovan]

Uhm, none of that post had anything to do with the thread. This thread is about asking how we would feel in our opinions, not your historic relationship that didn't work out.

I'm not trying to be an ass, but there seem to be an overabundance of posts of this past week from some people that have absolutely nothing to do with the threads they are posting them in. It's actually getting really damn annoying. As well as they seem to have to do with holding hands and learn from life.

Start a completely different thread for something like that, rather than put up a post in a thread it has nothing to do with. I (and am sure others too) find it a waste of time to come in to read a new post and find it's completely off subject because someone felt the need to go tell us something we don't care about.

I don't mean that in a personal way, but more as, if this thread wanted to know about your past relationship failures, it would have it in the subject. It does not-therefore we don't want to hear it.

Sorry, but this crap is getting annoying-I got to say something. It's like a sudden pattern with the mtf and f cd's >_>

[Tamara Croft]

DanteDonovan, don't speak to members like that, it's rude, you could have simply PM'd Lucy, but instead, you chose do it out in the open. I don't normally have to do this in this section, so I am very surprised to see a member trash another member, simply because you didn't like what she said. I can't even see it, there is no edit, but whatever it said, there was really no need for you to speak to her in that tone, I'm disgusted by it. You want respect from MTF members, then you go trash them like they're nothing but garbage? I'm extremely disappointed in your post!!