"Why are you dressed like that?"

[Magickman]

Sometimes I will be asked, "Why are you dressed like that?"

Innocently, I reply, "Like what?"

"Like a woman."

"No, I'm just a guy in a skirt, tights, and heels."

"Your nails are painted."

"I think they look nice, don't you?"


Some folks want to get to the root of the matter: why a fellow is dressed in clothes of the wrong gender, as they see it. It doesn't seem right to them, and they demand to know why.

Maybe I should ask them to be quiet, because I am in disguise, or perhaps on an undercover operation. I could claim to be in crossdressing camouflage. Or a journalist investigating mini-skirts. Etc., Etc.

Please feed me some suggested responses to those who find my apparel unsettling.

I just love to confuse people.

[Mistybtm]

If it is a woman you could ask why they are dressed like a guy. (jeans, shirt, nails not painted, ect.) you get the idea.

[Stephenie S]

Because I like it.

These aren't women's clothes, they are mine.

They would arrest me if I were naked.

Because I like it.

You are really under NO compunction to explain yourself.Relax.

Stephie

[Jason+]

Its usually my nails that draw the attention while out as I am still limiting myself on what goes out. Usually I will get the "your nails are painted" point blank statement to which I respond if at all with "why yes, yes they are." If I get the follow on question of either "did you lose a bet" or any variants of the "why" I simply tell them because I wanted them to be that color.

[Inna]

Oh my, really, it was 5 in the morning and I must have wondered to my wife's closet by mistake, thanks a lot, I didn't notice.

or

I had brain tumor when I was 3 months old, and in order to remove it doctors had to remove part of my brain which controls sex hormones, well I am a fully functional female but as you see look like a bloke. After my mom died 4 months after I was born my dad raised me by him self until age of 3 when he was killed in this horrific accident at work and since I didn't have any further family I was raised by a man that has abused me. I have overcome the shortfalls and met this wonderful man and got married but 6 months after our marriage he passed away from heart attack. I am very happy to have met you, you are so sincere and want to know me better, I am so looking forward to meeting you and becoming friends.

[Fab Karen]

"because I like it."
If you wanted to say something a bit risky, you could say to THEM,"why are you dressed like that?"

[DianeDeBris]

Stephenie S. wrote: "They would arrest me if I were naked." What a fantastic response - thank you!! Hugs - Diane

[faltenrock]

because it makes me feel good, happy and relaxed

[Imogen_Mann]

Look down at yourself.... Yelp loudly and say "The heels don't match the skirt !? I just KNEW it" Then cast your eyes to the heavens and yell out "Curse you Moriarty !" and walk slowly, confidently away.

[Gerrijerry]

My nails are painted. Are you sure, what color I am color blind and the salon told me that was clear.

My aren't you so smart to notice, I like guys that are so smart and cute.

I am not dressed like a man because I was born this way.

Do you want help with your makeup, and nails. I would be happy to help you.

Yes I love your outfit also, not to feminine and just enought to make others think you might be a male.

If you really want to get ahead in our company, this is the way you have to dress didn't you know that.

[erickka]

Because I can dress as a girl, and by gosh. I will!

[Alice Torn]

Oh, are not thrift stores great!

[linda allen]

Well, of course the questions are rude, but "because I feel like it" or "because I want to" are probably the best answers if you can't just walk on by without answering at all.

Another choice would be "I don't really think it's any of your business."

[Angie G]

These belonged to my late wife wearing them makes me feel close to her.
Angie

[kym]

I personally like:"me? dressed as a woman? would that be anything like you dressed as a man? after all you are wearing pants/jeans and a mans style shirt, I'm just following societies example." gets them everytime.

[Kim_Bitzflick]

How about....

OH S#%T! I knew something was wrong!

or

Are your the fashion Police?

or

Unlike you, I'm not a lemming (turn & walk away. let them figure out what a lemming is).

[RachelPortugal]

The washing machine is broken and my wife has more clothes than me.

[Miss Misery]

Say "SHHH. Two -words, witness protection." And walk away.

OR

Act startled like you've just been awakened and say "Where am I? And how did I become a man?"

Last

"I have multiple personality disorder - one is a woman and one's an axe murderer ..."

[Ruth]

Seriously, I think it's quite a rude question, if it's coming out of the blue from a stranger. I don't feel obliged to respond to gratuitous rudeness from strangers.

[Holly]

I thought my Armani gown would be a bit much for the grocery store, don't you agree?

[maryannnite]

Question why are you dress that way : because it a one of my good days

[Billijo49504]

Stephene S that's one i've used several times, and it makes them wonder. Keep um guessing...BJ

Because I like it.

These aren't women's clothes, they are mine.

They would arrest me if I were naked.

Because I like it.

You are really under NO compunction to explain yourself.Relax.

Stephie

[Tracii G]

I have gotten the "why are your toenails red" Q a few times I answered "yeah I love that color what color are you wearing?"
That Q was from a guy and he just looked at me funny and walked off shaking his head.
Women do ask that Q too so I tell them "I like painting my toenails just like you".They usually say its a great color and looks nice.

[Kirra_Moon]

The only thing I get questioned about is the length of my fingernails. I usually respond by talking in a circle. By the time they realized I didn’t really answer their question the moment is over, and I’ve already left the scene. Misdirection, its not lying, its mind games.

[ReineD]

Bada boom! Some of the one liners in this thread are priceless!

Some folks want to get to the root of the matter: why a fellow is dressed in clothes of the wrong gender, as they see it. It doesn't seem right to them, and they demand to know why.

It's rude to make demands. But, I understand their wish for answers. I think it's healthy for people to want to understand you. It means they're not automatically making value judgments, as in "Oh, what a perv", or "This is so wrong".

An anecdote: Years before knowing my SO, I attended a weekly women's group where there was a CDer. The first few times I kept sneaking peeks. There was something about her appearance that seemed incongruous to me, not ever having seen a CDer before. Like the people who ask you questions, I also didn't make any value judgments. It was just my brain learning to construct a whole new category of people that I had not encountered before ... the people who feel a need to present (or dress in your case) as the gender different than birth.

Within 3 or 4 meetings it all fell into place, especially as I got to know her better, and my friend's appearance became commonplace for me. It didn't take long for me to think of her just as she was, without needing to find words to define her to myself, even though her wife also attended the meetings and she had explained to me (after the second meeting, I think) that her husband was a crossdresser.

But the people you meet when you're out and about don't have that luxury, if they won't see you again. Hence the questions, if they are open minded and they feel comfortable enough to ask you.

I would just answer that you are transgender (or however you define yourself), and make yourself available to answer more questions if you have the time. I'm sure you'll be able to enlighten many people, and if you do see some of these folks on a regular basis, it won't take long for them to just simply begin to take you as you are.