Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 31

Thread: CDing in public in the modern era

  1. #1
    New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    18

    CDing in public in the modern era

    I'm curious how people here who are not fully "out" feel about risking public CDing in the modern world. It's something I've not done for a while and at least part of my reasoning is that _everyone_ has a camera on them these days, be it their phone or otherwise. Combined with social media it seems like this would be an increased risk in various ways.

    Technically if someone posts a picture of "that crossdressing freak on the bus" or whatever on their facebook/hate site/etc you'll probably never know about it, but the possibility exist. Should this really matter though? If you're out in public well... then you're already public at least to some extent. I'm not sure why the idea bothers me, I suspect because I have no control over it. Even when I'm dressed male I'm not keen on my pictures floating around out there. Typically my policy is not to let the fear of what others may do rule my life, but I'm finding that policy harder to implement in practice as I get older.


    Do the rest of you let the cameras everywhere affect if/how often/what time/where you CD in public?

  2. #2
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    52
    As we're (well where I am) surrounded by surveillance cameras, and nearly everyone has a phone/camera you're going to be photographed whether you like it or not.

  3. #3
    New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    18
    Aye security cameras are another issue, and there have been some legal issues with security tapes leaking things they ought not be on sites like youtube and getting in serious trouble.

    Either way you're right, if you go in public odds are you're going to have your picture taken. What happens to that picture/video from there is another matter.

  4. #4
    Just Saying Hi Traci Elizabeth's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    The World of Womanhood
    Posts
    2,358
    I would be much less concerned about a camera (as you & Janice stated, they are everywhere) than I would be running into your neighbors, unknowing friends, or family if you are totally in the closet.

    But I guess that is one way of coming out into the light!

    Forget the cameras and get out there and be you and have fun.


    Just call Me: "W - O - M - A - N"

    As King said: "I'm free at last, I'm free at last.
    Thank God Almighty I'm free at last!"

  5. #5
    The best of both worlds Kathi Lake's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Right there. To your left. No, your LEFT! Yes, that's it. Hi.
    Posts
    3,497
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaelin View Post
    I'm curious how people here who are not fully "out" feel about risking public CDing in the modern world.
    Wait a minute? Did you say risk? You mean, there's risk involved with dressing as a woman and going out and about?! Wow, I'd better change my ways.

    Or not!

    We always have to do the whole risk/reward thing every time we do this. For me, the rewards far outweigh the risks of being seen. Either that or I'm just not bright enough to know that there are risks.



    Kathi

  6. #6
    fearless transowman juno's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    North Carolina
    Posts
    706
    Yes, what if somebody catches you wearing shoes that don't match. The horror.

    Seriously, unless you are running for politics, the chances are higher that you will lose out more by not going out.

  7. #7
    Member DeeDeeB's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Gunks, NY
    Posts
    345
    When I post online, speak on the phone, or go out side (and I sometimes wonder about conversation within my home), I understand that whatever I say, am dressed in, or whatever may become public knowledge. I need to accept this about life. So, when I go in public as Dee, I understand that everyone I know may find out. So far, it's just been a co-worker who I can now discuss fashion with, but I decided a number of years ago that I am old enough to live my life as I want, not as I think others expect from me. I'm still working on that, but progress has been continual, if somewhat slow.

    Dee

    PS: Also, as to the modern era, we are now protected in many if not most states from hate crimes, whereas not too long ago we could be arrested for CDing most anywhere.

  8. #8
    Style Icon Sara Jessica's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    The OC, California
    Posts
    5,919
    Quote Originally Posted by Kathi Lake View Post
    Wait a minute? Did you say risk? You mean, there's risk involved with dressing as a woman and going out and about?! Wow, I'd better change my ways.

    Or not!
    Or not! is totally right on Kathi. A big fat whatever. To quote a dear friend of mine, I'm doubting the world will explode if something stupid like this were to happen. The bottom line is it's best to be prepared for the "what-if", the possibility, yet not a probability. If you can feel like you can cope with the potential fall-out, then going out is for you. Otherwise, it might drive you crazy.

    Quote Originally Posted by Traci Elizabeth View Post
    I would be much less concerned about a camera (as you & Janice stated, they are everywhere) than I would be running into your neighbors, unknowing friends, or family if you are totally in the closet.
    This is where radius theory comes in. The larger the radius from your home or place of work, the less likely it will be that you will run into someone you know. But it's not a perfect theory. You've heard the "small world" song, I'm sure.
    Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
    Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)

  9. #9
    Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Midwest US
    Posts
    144
    I guess I just never thought about it like that. Oh well, I can't worry about everything.

  10. #10
    New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    18
    Excellent points all. I guess my bigger concern was/is with targeted hate crimes, but as Dee points out the law offers us more protection now - of course this won't stop certain types of things, but perhaps the overly fearful/sheltered life isn't really worth living.

    I guess we all end up making the decision of whether our desires/needs trump the risk each and every time we do something (be it CDing or anything else in life).

  11. #11
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    1,013
    I think the risk is more of how you dress rather being out . What I mean is go out dressed like Rupaul you will attract attention if that's your goal. From what I have learnt here , ( I have never tried ) is to dress to blend in and go almost un noticed.
    I do not!! Claim to be an expert on any topic, when I post a new thread or reply on any thread my imput is strickly that of a crossdresser. Not to offend Gay people , Transexuals or any other life style, I am only commenting on one of my own.

  12. #12
    Silver Member Loni's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    in the hills of central california
    Posts
    2,742
    cameras are every were, but if someone were to take your photo and post it up on line. you can sue them. (dressed or even in drab).
    cameras can take a photo, just as long as it is not a photo of a "person" and includes a whole sean it is legal.
    as per legal judge decrees you have no right to expect privacy in public. unless you are a cop.
    so get out there and have on your best face and side toward the cameras.

  13. #13
    Aussie girl Tasha McIntyre's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Brisbane, Australia
    Posts
    2,002
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaelin View Post
    Do the rest of you let the cameras everywhere affect if/how often/what time/where you CD in public?
    No, not at all. The shopping centres I visit have cameras everywhere, and I see them as an aid to my safety and a deterrent to any neanderthals that may want to compromise my safety.

    Tash

  14. #14
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    52
    Quote Originally Posted by Tasha McIntyre View Post
    No, not at all. The shopping centres I visit have cameras everywhere, and I see them as an aid to my safety and a deterrent to any neanderthals that may want to compromise my safety.

    Tash
    Yes, the intrusiveness of them annoys me, but the fact they have been helpful in tracking down perpetrators of horrendous crimes puts me in a dilemma.

  15. #15
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Orange County, Calif.
    Posts
    24,900
    Yes, you're correct, Kaelin! Cameras were everywhere at the SCC! And, all the girls there were leaning to get IN as many as possible!
    And, you're rite again! Now they're ALL OVER THE INTERNET! EEEK!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  16. #16
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    410
    risk ,there is risk with everything we do from driving to buying a stock , I think as lucy said if you are dressed like a everyday women whats the point in taking
    you picture people are looking for sensationalism to photograph ,

  17. #17
    Silver Member Tina B.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    North Coast of California
    Posts
    4,230
    Or do what the sisters of perpetual indulgence do, holler "PHOTO OP", and pose real pretty.
    you are right cameras are everywhere now days, and not all of them are good to have out there. most kids with a cell phone have one, and they are the ones that will spot us right off. But with all the sites out there, chances are you and everyone you know, will never know. I live in a small town and worry a lot more about who I would run into face to face. When I lived in the city it was easy to get lost in the crowd, and some days I miss that.
    Tina B.

  18. #18
    Accepting myself Tommie Rae's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    SF Bay Area
    Posts
    93
    I wish more people would use their cameras. I very seldom get asked to pose for a photo and I would love it if some of my casual acquaintances would take a picture and send it to me. I am not in the public eye as either male or female so I really do not care about cameras.

  19. #19
    Silver Member Marcia Blue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Western Iowa
    Posts
    2,244
    [SIZE="3"]I have had my picture taken when out and about. I even posed for a few. The odds of anyone recognizing me, dressed is slim. Most snap-shots that end up on the Internet have a very low viewer count. I do shy away from news photographers.[/SIZE]
    Marcia (LOVES) Blue

  20. #20
    Senior Member Melissa Rose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Sacramento, CA
    Posts
    1,001
    Once you step out in public, in any form or manner of dress, you are exposing your self to risk and giving up some aspects of privacy. I'm out in public on a regular basis and the risks involved are ones I willing to take since I believe those risks are quite small. It is likely someone has snapped a picture of me without my knowledge. I really don't care. I've been asked to pose for pictures usually by younger women in a club or bar, and they have always done it in a nice and polite manner. I don't mind. I have a Flickr page so obviously I don't have a fear of my pictures being on the internet.

    There are security cameras everywhere including outdoor public areas such as parks and streets. It is a just a part of living into today's world. I go in Sephora on a regular basis even if it is just to say hi to my favorite sales person. She gives me a lot of free samples, and puts them into my purse or shopping bag. She holds hold them up so the security cameras can see I'm not walking out the store with shoplifted items. I never paid attention to the cameras, which are well disguised, until she did this for the first time.

    I had a photo album on this site and also have one in the chat room I frequent. Both sites are behind a log in. Someone asked if I was afraid someone I knew in my boy life would see them. My response was I would ask them what they were doing on a cd/tg web site and what they were doing looking at the pictures. Also, I look rather different so I doubt they would recognize me without prior knowledge of my dual life.

    The bottom line is I don't worry about it so it does not become a fear that stops me from fully enjoying my time out as a woman.

  21. #21
    Silver Member AKAMichelle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    2,857
    I say "SMILE you are on candid camera". You can't stop them from taking the pictures but you can control your appearance. If you look presentable and aren't attracting unnecessary attention then why not.

    Don't let fear of the someone else's actions stop you from being you.
    Michelle

  22. #22
    Emerging Diva Nikki A.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    ne pa
    Posts
    2,740
    How about the government cameras in your house?
    Actually once you go public anything may happen, but the chances of someone that you know, seeing your picture and & recognising you are slim. Unless you make the front page of the local paper LOL.

  23. #23
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    The Poconos PA
    Posts
    18,971
    I kind of agree with Nikki. If they are that interested, I say let them go for it and knock themselves out. Nikki knows what I mean anyway.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  24. #24
    Tamara Ann Valla tamarav's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Pacific Northwest
    Posts
    3,259
    [SIZE=4]If you are going to go out, you have to realize you have already blown your annomimity. You are now "at risk" for pictures and any other sort of contact that is there. But, that is why most of us go out anyway! [/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4][/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4]If I know a camera is around I simply pose for it, or walk up to the person with their mouth open and talk with them. Being out and about exposes you to the same stuff we face daily anyway, you just look different than you usually do.[/SIZE]
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    I am a licensed Cosmetologist (hair stylist, not cosmonaut), work as a hair and wig stylist, makeup artist and permanent makeup artist, dressed as you see in my avatar and albums.

    My web site www.apparentlyfemale.com

    I have over 2,500 pictures on my Flicker site located at http://www.flickr.com/photos/9315394@N02/

  25. #25
    Countess in Exile divamissz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Dallas, TX
    Posts
    717
    It doesn't matter what you are wearing, the moment you leave the privacy of your own home your privacy pretty much is gone. Cities are covered with CCTV. Go into a mall, you're on CCTV, watched by security, observed by salespeople in the shops. Drive down the street, there's cameras on stoplights and monitoring roadways, and if you have a toll tag...

    And of course, we now live in a world where people use Foursquare and Twitter to tell everyone where they are, Facebook to report our status, Flickr to post photos taken everywhere, YouTube to post random photos. And you can be part of those internet breadcrumbs-even when you don't want to be.

    I chose to not be afraid of the world. If someone sees me, that's part of what happens when you go out. I refuse to be terrified that someone might see me. I can't control what happens, just how I react to it.

    And I chose to think I'm a rock star, baby! Take my picture, be my paparazzi! Let's make Lindsay and Paris want to scream at their PR flacks because I got more face time than they did!

    Yes, I'm kidding, but wouldn't it be fun...
    Countess in exile
    Keep Calm and Dance to Morrissey
    Z and the Universe
    I'm also on Twitter and Facebook

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State