"Women dress up for other women".

[sometimes_miss]

The first part of my answer is, when crossdressing, I dress so that I feel my outfit is appropriate for who I am. Now, not that I'm delusional or anything, but personality/developmental wise, I'm kind of stuck self identifying as a young teen girl. So most of what I wear are things that represent that feeling. I don't go out crossdressed, and pretty much never look in the mirror, so take that for what it's worth.
Now, on who other people dress for. Women will deny they ever dress 'for' other women. Yet, no men give a rat's ass about designer names on clothes. Yet, a whole lot of women go to great lengths to buy designer name clothes and let other people know about it, either by displaying the designer's logo or making sure they mention it casually in discussion. I think that a lot of women DO dress in ways to make a statement, whether that statement is about sexual desirability, class, wealth, fashion knowledge and being up to date on what's currently in style, or in some cases, to show off jewelry that other people (usually men) have paid a lot of money for her to wear, to demonstrate her desirability to that man or men, perhaps to let everyone else know how much she is valued by the opposite sex. If there are any questions about whether people dress for others, perhaps compare what they wear in their own house when no one else is home or coming over, to how they appear when in public. I think in 99% of the cases, you'll find two completely different appearances. So the idea that women only dress for themselves is nonsense; when they know they'll be seen by other people, they always make an effort to look better than, say, when they're staying at home late at night alone, doing the laundry, which is when they are truly only dressing for themselves.

[Emma England]

I think both gg's and cd's dress for themselves.

[jenni_xx]

The question isn't so much about individual women's personalities. I think you'll get more accurate answers if you ask what are her motives when a woman wears particular items of clothing. Unless the sexy sweater dress woman is a lesbian, if anyone thinks she dresses for other women, or even purely for herself, you have a lot to learn about women. She is definitely dressing for men (edited to add: or for the man in her life). But I would say that the plaid dress woman is dressing for herself.

I'd like to tweak this even further. Could it not be argued that the woman in the sexy sweater dress she is ultimately dressing for herself? After all, isn't it (for want of a better word) an appeal to others (men) for ultimately her own benefit in that receiving positive responses from men would result in making her feel great about herself?

[linda allen]

Well, I'm "in the closet" so I dress for myself.

Photos I take are just for me, I wouldn't dare post them.

[Sara Jessica]

Real world observations. Women in their packs (cliques at work, my wife & her friends) will often comment within minutes, sometimes seconds, as to what the others are wearing. It could be an overall "what a cute outfit" to "I'm just loving those shoes".

It would be an over-generalization to say that all women dress for other women but I do get the premise based on the observations I've conveyed above. I'm certain many do, although the deeper motivations certainly vary.

I dress for myself in that I have been a keen observer of style as long as I can remember. So in trying to be in style and present as such, I am also dressing for others by default. I appreciate it when I'm on the receiving end of comments such as those I describe in the first paragraph, whether from women or others in the TG community. It tells me I'm doing something right, hopefully from a style standpoint.

Yet, no men give a rat's ass about designer names on clothes.

Many do, how else would you explain the popularity of brands such as Tommy Bahama, Ed Hardy, etc. Men's departments are full of "names" just as women's are. It's just that as a percentage, I'd guess that more women care than men. Still, plenty of men do care.

[Chari]

I too dress to satisfy me, for comfort, and to be noticed!

[MiamiMarie]

GG here.

We women mainly dress for ourselves unless we are specifically trying to entice men or trying to feel special among stylish or powerful women, but honestly, that is very rarely the case. Especially if you're not single going to night clubs or attending a formal tea or something.

[ReineD]

I'd like to tweak this even further. Could it not be argued that the woman in the sexy sweater dress she is ultimately dressing for herself? After all, isn't it (for want of a better word) an appeal to others (men) for ultimately her own benefit in that receiving positive responses from men would result in making her feel great about herself?

That's precisely my point. The woman in the sexy sweater dress feels better about herself when she receives positive responses from men (not women). She probably doesn't dress this way if she's spending an evening alone at home. And as Miamimarie pointed out, she likely doesn't dress like this when she's out grocery shopping, or if she attends a baby shower.

My other point is women who don't dress this way, don't seek men's (or her man's) positive, specifically sexual responses. Maybe they've been married for a long time, or they know their husbands are attracted to them for other reasons than their booties (for lack of a better term), or their focus is on their kids or their careers, for example. These are the women who do dress for themselves, whether it is in blue jeans or basic office attire.

I want to add there is nothing wrong with a woman dressing up in a sexy manner, wanting to please her man (or looking for a man if she's single). I try to appeal to my SO when I dress like this, or when I wear a pair of tight leggings (that shows off certain parts of my body ) and heels with a sexy sweater.

Just let's not say that women who dress sexily don't have a man, (or men) in mind when they wear outfits like this. Because frankly, women don't look at other womens' behinds the same way that men do.

[Samantha_Smile]

I dress for me. To feel good about myself becuase I atleast think I look pretty.
Wheter I do or not is anyones guess and that's why I post pictures.

I have a rule that I only post pictures when I get an item or items that give me a drastically different appearance- clothes, wig, makeup trick.
And because I, like many, stay indoors en femme, I like to hear that I look pretty from other TGs (the ultimate compliments ofcourse come from GGs; lets face it were emulating them after all)

Ofcourse the fact that I dress to look good to me does beg the question
"Am I dressing to look good to me (the owner of a male brain), or to men in general"?
Well the answer is yes, but only in a world where marmite appeals to all men in general.

The point is were all different; some will dress to impress women, some to impress men. The ultimate goal is to impress both

[docrobbysherry]

Of course, many of u DID get what I meant!
But, I never mind when the discussion is INTERESTING! Which I think it IS!

That's what a woman said at a mixed function I was at last week. Someone mentioned women in very hi-heels. A guy said, "They wear those for men!"
Then, a woman responded with my TITLE LINE above!

Whether or NOT that's tru, I wondered who CDs dress up for? Those of u that DO dress up, that is!?

As a closet CD, I dress up for MYSELF! Then, I may post my pics in the vain hope that OTHER'S mite like them. But, whether they DO or DON'T, I assemble my looks to suit MYSELF!

Those of u that dress up, WHY do u do it? For yourself? For other CDs? For men or GGs?
Curious minds want to KNOW!

I was trying to ask about those of u that "DRESS UP" especially FANCY! EXTRA NICE! Not regular everyday dressing. That's why I used the "very hi-heels" analogy.
It's NOT about u dressing to "blend" or for your "comfort". It's about dressing to STAND OUT on purpose!

If, and when U dress up like that, WHO IS IT FOR?

[Satrana]

That's precisely my point. The woman in the sexy sweater dress feels better about herself when she receives positive responses from men (not women).

Why would she not be receiving compliments from women too? Everytime my wife wears something sexy and revealing all the women she meets makes her outfit a big topic of conversation not just a polite openner. And she wears sexy clothes whether I am with her or not so its not for my benefit and usually she only goes out with female friends.

Are we not forgetting that most women are eager to attend any event that gives them the opportunity to dress up and have fun doing so. Cocktail dresses for example are often very sexy and revealing and yet many women attending a cocktail party do so without their partners. They are not seeking male attention and most will not get it either. Many men will not compliment a women on her outfit either because this is not something they are interested in talking about, or are committed or they do not want to be accused of sexist remarks. Mostly it is men on the game that will compliment.

If women only wore sexy clothes with men in mind then happily married women going out without their partner would never dress up. Go to any bar/club/event and you would see that is not correct.

I believe many women enjoy feeling good by wearing sexy clothes. They enjoy knowing that they are presenting a sexy image and are considered sexy by everyone (men and women) they meet. It is not different than getting a new hairstyle and feeling good because it makes you look more sexy.

I think this topic also touches upon a person's level of self confidence and upbringing. Women are often taught when young to avoid looking sexy because bad things will happen to them if they do.

[JennaR]

[SIZE="2"][SIZE="5"] Tell me this: If women only dress for themselves why is the fashion industry a multi billion dollar industry. The fact remains that 99% of guy's don't know or care if it's a designer dress, purse, shoe, all we really care about is if it catches our eyeso, the only people that even realize what your wearing is other women (ok there are plenty of men who can but thats's not the normal)?????? [/SIZE][/SIZE]

[ReineD]

Are we not forgetting that most women are eager to attend any event that gives them the opportunity to dress up and have fun doing so. Cocktail dresses for example are often very sexy and revealing and yet many women attending a cocktail party do so without their partners. They are not seeking male attention and most will not get it either.

Satrana, why do you think that a woman will choose a low cut dress revealing cleavage, or a dress with a slit that is strategically placed, or one whose fabric will show her derriere to its fullest advantage? There are attractive and stylish clothing that do not do these things.

Yes, there are married women who go to restaurants and cocktail parties who are not looking for men. It doesn't mean they don't know precisely who notices them when they wear particular outfits, and more importantly, who appreciates the outfit in a particular way. Some outfits send clear signals, while others do not.

We can debate this forever, and it is difficult without comparing pictures of specific outfits, but I hope that people reading this thread will understand the difference between what you and I are both describing.

As to women who notice these sexy outfits, do you know what I think when I notice, or what it is that makes me notice? "Wow, I wish I looked like that too!", not "Wow, I'd like to know what she's like, or what she's wearing underneath."

[Sarah Doepner]

Doc,

I dress for the guy who is hiding behind the girl clothes when I get dressed. Huh??? I am a male and the clothing I pick out to dress in are chosen first to appeal to that me as a guy. Regardless of the situation, blending or standing out, the first choice must be one that the guy under the wig thought would be nice on his evil twin sister. Once I'm dressed I begin the process of improving the look so it will be acceptable to a woman. When all is said and done, I have no desire to intentionally attract a man's attention but I would like to draw a woman's approval.

Does that kind of approach what you are looking for?

[kristinacd55]

That's definitely true in some cases....not all but many do.

[SusieB]

I dress to feel comfortable and feminine and to look feminine. But then I am in the closet and am absolutely certain that NO one and I mean NO one would look at me in a dress and consider me feminine. So I dress for myself. But, if I had the opportunity to dress in the company of others, I think my focus would be on looking attractive (not attracting). In these circumstances I believe I would feel better if the people in my company were comfortable because I was dressed appropriately. I suppose it all comes down to what you want from the particular occasion for which you are dressing.

But then what do I know.

[Christy_M]

I think people dress for their own self esteem. whether it is GG, CD or GM. I want to feel good about my look. The clothes I wear give me a boost to my self esteem. Wen I dress in male clothes for work, I feel good about my presentation becasue I want people to see me as confident and capable of doing the job I am assigned. When I wear a dress and heels, I want to feel good about presenting as a woman. I want others to see me as confident in who I am. I guess this means I dress for me but the ultimate goal is to shape people's perceptions of me to fit my own needs of acceptance.

[WifeofWrenchette]

As a GG, I dress for myself, in basically whatever is the most comfortable.

[lingerieLiz]

I have talked about this with women on occasion. Usually after a day of shopping. Someone in the group will always say that women dress for women. After a couple of drinks it is decided there are too many reasons why women dress the way they do to categorize. Women do dress for women especially when attending a primarily women’s function where all will be dressed up. Other than that we could create a whole new discussion board just to resolve the issue.


I dress like most women because it is ingrained. I just identify with the clothes. I don’t know why or care anymore. In my youth I had a very nice wardrobe of very cute outfits. From there I have migrated through various fashion phases as fashions and age dictated. Today I enjoy wearing comfortable clothes most of the time. I also enjoy wearing pretty outfits on special occasions. My general attire fits in with what women around me wear. As I have gotten older comfortable has taken over most of the time as it has for most women. That doesn’t mean I don’t wear fashionable clothes.

[Satrana]

It doesn't mean they don't know precisely who notices them when they wear particular outfits, and more importantly, who appreciates the outfit in a particular way.

Yes I know women are aware that certain designs were developed to catch a man's eye but where you and I disagree is whether a women can wear such an outfit and enjoy its sexiness without needing or wanting to please men.

If a woman wears such a sexy dress and only attends a dinner with her girlfriends and ignores everyone else then how can you claim she is dressing up with men in mind? Even yesterday while in the mall I saw a woman with a very similar top with the big scooped back and I thought of this thread. If you love clothes enough then you would wear what you liked irregardless.

Many women love dressing up but have to wait for an event that gives them permission to do so without being condemned. Western culture inhibits women from dressing up whenever they should wish but not all women follow the rules and not all cultures have such an inhibition.

As to women who notice these sexy outfits, do you know what I think when I notice, or what it is that makes me notice? "Wow, I wish I looked like that too!", not "Wow, I'd like to know what she's like, or what she's wearing underneath."

You think some women don't want to get both reactions? They want to be considered sexy by both men (desire) and women (jealousy). They enjoy the power trip.

And Jenna has a great point. Why would a woman drop hundreds of dollars on designer dress, designer handbag, designer shoes if men (excepting gays and CDs) don't have a clue what these items are. It is the look of the outfit not the name that interests men. So women buy designer labels solely to show off to other women.

A good analogy would be a guy who buys a flashy sports car. Does that mean every time he drives it he does so because he wants female adoration. Or can he enjoy the sports car as a thing of beauty which he enjoys to drive irregardless of who may see him in it?

[Kaz]

My daughter is in her last year at University doing fashion design. She tries to design clothes that look and feel great - different, but just fabulous.

When I dress en femme it is for me primarily. I went through a pahse when I wanted to go out and blend, and then I dressed to fit in (i.e. mirror what other are wearing).

When I am not trying to blend in (your point maybe Doc) I dress to look and feel good, and experiment with what it looks like and how I feel.

I do not feel this way on "drab" mode. I have been dressing strictly utilitarian. However, I have recently noticed some interesting menswear and have been attracted to dressing interestingly in male mode. Is this for me or to express my masculinity? I think it is because I just like the look!

When we had the albums, I liked to get feedback on what I was doing, because I was seeking reassurance about going out and blending. Now that's gone, I do it for me and don't much care about going out and all that. So Doc, maybe the big oufits will be the next thing!

[Shananigans]

That's precisely my point. The woman in the sexy sweater dress feels better about herself when she receives positive responses from men (not women).

Hmm...idk...she got a positive response from me. Lesbians/bis dress sexy too... I think it's safer to say that women may be dressing sexy just to evoke sexual thoughts in general.

When I am dressing sexy...I do it for sex appeal in general. Sex appeal for myself (when I feel sexy, I usually feel more in the mood), for other women (to make them want me, or want to look like me), and for men (to wish they had me).

[TammyPA]

I use to say"I dress for confort not for speed", now that I have lost 30+ lbs I am changing that a little. Another 20 to go.

[Pythos]

Who do I dress for?

Me.

But I also dress in some kind of effort to attract a woman that likes men, but is not afraid of being attracted to the feminine image. Yes, odd, I know. I guess the kind of woman I would attract is a bisexual woman. Or at least a very open and secure woman that knows what she likes, and does not care what others think.

It helps that all the clothing I wear I find comfortable, yes even the corset If I didn't, I simply would not wear them.

The sports car analogy is perfect. I had and loved my mustang because it was an awesome machine. There was no sex appeal to that monster, it was fit for one thing. Being loud and going fast. I had no intention of attracting women with what some guys would call a "chick magnet". Nope, I just loved how the beast looked and acted. *sigh* I miss it.

I love my catsuits because of how they look and feel. I think they make me look pretty good if I do say so myself. They exude confidence just by the mere act of getting into it. Do I wear them to attract men, or women? Nope. Thought it is fun to hear a GUY say, "I wish I had your build to wear something like that" Yes I have gotten that very line from a very straight male friend of mine. When it come to women, I hope I inspire them to have the mindset "if he can wear that, then so can I!!" LOL. That would be too cool, if they did it with taste.

[Jenniferx1]

[QUOTE=NicoleScott;2297582]

Coutner question for ya Doc! If you dress strictly for yourself, and yourself only, why do you post pics in the name of vanity? /QUOTE]

Doc, I wouldn't presume to speak for you, but I'd like a stab at this.

Blaire, are you implying that we dress up only to post pics of ourselves? Taking pictures is done for many reasons (shall I list?), and posting them is an afterthought.




I dressed up before I took pics, and I took pics long before the internet. Yes, I like to share my pics, especially with other cd's. Nothing wrong with a little feedback, and getting a little recognition for my efforts. I have many more pics than I have posted. Before archiving my pics digitally, I maintained a scrapbook.
I also like to see pics of other cd's. And don't question their motives for posting them.

Hey, I just got a new car! Of course, I only bought it so I could take pictures of it to post online.

Totally agree with you Nicole, I like to get feedback from other Cd`s regardless of positivity. I dress to try and impress my GG. Perhaps my vanity is poor, I feel there is no bigger compliment than a positive response from a woman.

Just an opinion!!!