I was the prettiest girl in the world until...

[giuseppina]

Hello Christy,

I am saddened by the treatment you received. Your reaction afterward is not uncommon for abuse.

It appears an infraction or two has occurred. Perhaps a visit to the store manager in question from the local police department will set them straight if they aren't willing to lay charges.

Please pursue this, if not for your own healing, then for the protection of others.

Good luck.

[linda allen]

I agree with everyone else and if a law has been broken, I would take it up with the authorities. The store owes you an appology and the assurance that all their employees will be properly trained in these matters. Perhaps they owe you compensation as well.

That said, my guess is that another customer went to the manager and complained that "there is a man in the woman's dressing room" and the manager felt compelled to tell you to leave to pacify the customer. If the manager had known the law, she could have explained to the customer that you had a legal right to be in the dressing room.

It's easy to forget how intolerant some people can be.

[Michelle James]

I just e mailed them as well.

[Stephenie S]

I just sent off my email of complaint to Ross Customer Service.

Does anyone have the email address of Corporate Headquarters?
I will email them as well, but I can't come up with a good address.

Thanks

Stephie

[Stephenie S]

My email to the complaints department was rejected. Let's hope Ross is getting tired of complaints on this issue.

************************************************** ***************

Not being able to reach them by email, I wrote a snail mail to them at:

Ross Stores Corporate Offices
4440 Rosewood Drive
Pleasanton, CA 94588

[SherriePall]

Christy -- Chin up, girl. That manager has a problem, not you. I just finished sending off a complaint to Ross.
Take care.

[Rianna Humble]

Another email to their customer service address:

Dear Sir or Madam,

As a transgendered person, I am a member of an internet based support group. Today, I read one member's horrific ordeal suffered at one of your stores, specifically the one located at 18520 33rd Avenue W # A, Lynnwood, WA 98037.

This transwoman had intended to make numerous purchases in your Lynnwood store, and to that end been led by a sales assistant to a changing room where she was trying on clothing to ensure that they fit adequately.

Your store manager willfully discriminated against her and treated her in such a horrible way that she was forced to leave and indeed later became physically sick.

It seems that your store manager does not believe that she is subject to the laws of the state of Washington isofar as she appears to believe that she has the right to discriminate against someone and to humiliate them based solely upon their gender status.

Might I request that you inform me what steps you will take to ensure that all of your staff - from senior management to sales assistants are made fully aware of their legal obligations?

I hope that your response to my enquiry will enable me to encourage other members of this community to feel safe to shop in your stores without fear of such unlawful discrimination.

--
Rianna Humble

[kimdl93]

I'd definately complain to Ross's management. My god, what a ridiculous reaction.

[Roxanne_Alternate]

I'm so sorry that something this bad has happened to you. This is exactly the reason why I prefer not to try on clothes in stores and why I order them online/buy without trying them on. We don't have Ross stores here, but I know that some CD/TG's here have had issues with that with other stores as well.

I hope that you will feel better really soon! Don't be discouraged, hold your head up high!

[LitaKelley]

lol.. they deleted the comments from their facebook page.. I gather they're trying to prevent this from going more public.

[Stephanie Anne]

There is no way that manager could be in the right on what she did. you have state level protection against harassment.

You need to document this with the store's corporate office, watchdog sites like the consumerist or social sites like reddit and file a complaint with your local aclu or other equal rights organization.

the worst thing you can do is let this go. Doing so will enforce the ability for bigots like this and other customers who obviously thought they were in the right to complain. Do everyone and yourself a favor and fight for your rights girl!

BTW, I fired off a complaint of scandalous inflammatory writ the likes of which the western united states has rarely seen.

[joank]

COMPLAIN!!! And go to Kohl's (or other places).

[Sarah Welch]

These EFF'in people are deleting our comments made to their Facebook wall.
Unmitigated gall.
I bet they will try to out Christy just to shut everyone up, these corporate B******s have no concience when it comes to making the all mighty dollar.

[Rianna Humble]

They deleted one comment of mine, so I added another 6. If we all do the same, they'll be spending so much time chasing the negative publicity that they'll eventually work out it is cheaper to act on the unlawful conduct.

[Mary of Long Beach]

What an awful thing to happen. I feel for you. Second hand stores are usually privately owned and I find it easier to deal with them. You might try it. Good luck, mary

[JulieC]

I thought everything was coming up roses for me today and then a big fat helping of reality was served up - cold I might add...

Christy, take the following with the love and kindness meant. I know this was a terrible, awful event.

You were not served a big fat helping of reality. You were served a steaming pile of bigoted hatred, breaking of the law and serious, unabridged stupidity.

You have rights. Your rights under State of Washington law were DIRECTLY VIOLATED.

I will anxiously wait for your response.

Sincerely,

Christy

Christy, you won't get a response. I'm sure they've turned this over to their lawyers now, and therefore them talking about it will not serve their purposes. I will be very shocked indeed if they admit wrongdoing and attempt to right their most serious wrong.

Also, please be aware that it is highly likely that in any legal proceedings, this thread will likely be brought into the fray during discovery. If you are going to pursue legal avenues in this, I encourage you to consider that, and talk to a lawyer before posting your thoughts or further accounts of your actions.

[Traci Elizabeth]

I agree with everyone here that this should not have happened to you.

I do however feel that it could have been worse.

The police or store uniformed guards could have escorted you out of the dressing room and perhaps taken some legal actions against you. Not to say it would have stood up in court but you could have gone through a lot of legal hassles and legal expenses just for trying on some clothes in a woman's dressing room.

I have never had a problem (yet) and can't see that I ever would BUT your situation does give me cause to think out how I would react under such a situation.

Nevertheless, you have my sympathy and support. And I hope you never have to go though that again.

[rocketscientist]

The ACLU should be made aware of this. Since Ross is trying to sweep this under the rug by deleting Facebook postings, maybe the local media should be alerted as well. I bet the News at Six would really sink their teeth into this. Let's see Ross delete that.

[kay2]

Down a ways on their wall is this posting by them:

Thank you for your comments everyone. We appreciate your feedback and are sorry that you had negative experience at some of our stores. We are following up with teams at the locations you have mentioned. If any of you would like to provide more details, please email customer.service@ros.com. Thank you for letting us know!

I assume this is in response to our postings.

Meanwhile, there is a posting from Lita Kelley that has remained there for an hour. Maybe it is because Lita Kelley indicates the possibility of a print article.

I assume we have their attention. It will be interesting to see what happens. I know nothing about the store or their policies. Hopefully this is an isolated problem with one store and they will fix it fast.

[JulieC]

Lynwood, Washington is Seattle metro area. Somebody should contact the Seattle Times over this. Nice juicy story to run.

[Christy_M]

I certainly understand the discovery comments and the need to moderate comments based on future use. I really want to try and be a voice of reason. Having been a big fish in a publicly traded company, I know the cogs of the business usually turn slow. I am sure their lawyers are reviewing their position and trying to investigate their internal exposure to this. I would be surprised if they came out and admitted anything but I would imagine at some point they will try and reach out to me and others who have commented. I know one of the first things on their mind has to be damage control and that would explain removing the facebook posts. I would guess that is driven by minimizing external exposure until they figure out what happened in their store. As stated, the law was violated and I am sure they know this. They can't cover that part up but there are things big companies can do to sweep things under the rug. There are store videos and customer receipts that are also discoverable and that will show enough about who wa around and what transpired. If they get real brave, they could potentially destroy as much of that as possible. Maybe I will get the courage to call an attorney and see about what my options are.

I am not trying to support them but rather try to remain level headed as this moves forward. It was like a train leaving the station, slow to start but as it gets further along, it moves quite a bit faster. I don't want to come off the tracks and I am just so scared to be the Rosa Parks of the transgendered community. I am sure she didn't feel like doing it either.

My wife is trying to be supportive but doesn't understand other than acknowledging that I am hurt. She doesn't want our lives opened up to the public becasue of this and I can both understand her concerns and strive to keep her happy. She is a good woman who doesn't deserve to be drug through the mud becasue her husband is transgendered. The company's reaction will play a major role in how I proceed and their lack of response would certainly be construed as ignoring the issue instead of trying to get in front of it and be proactive in their remediation for how we will be treated in the future.

I am trying to be brave today as I have my family and career that should not suffer. I have only choked up a few times today which either means it is slowly passing or I am burying it deeper to keep from breaking down like I did so many times yesterday.

I can not say enough how touched I am buy everyone on this forum. I never in my life thought I would find my self in this situation and even if I had thought about getting outed, I always assumed it would be me against the world. Thank you so much for your efforts. They weigh heavily on my next moves and how I can best represent our community.

Love to all.

Christy

[JulieC]

Christy, you may be able to advance a court case with your name kept from public view. An attorney can help with this. I'm not a lawyer, but if I was a lawyer I could easily imagine serious $$$ punitive damages here. It's not that I think you should get rich off this, but the lesson has to be driven home and HARD that discrimination will NOT be tolerated.

Can you even begin to imagine how bad this would go down if a black woman was thrown out of the dressing rooms because her presence, as a black person, created a "situation"???? Ross is in SERIOUS hot water on this one. They blatantly, unequivocally, broke the law.



Here's another thought for all of us brave enough to do so; it appears their facebook page allows image uploads? We could upload images of ourselves, en femme, but maybe not too passable

[subaru_forster]

They can sweep the first x complaints about the situation under the rug if they like, but ultimately a company can only do what it thinks will make them the most money. The TG community accounts for a good chunk of their business, and they deserve to know that I don't want to give my money to a franchise that condones this treatment to its customers.

I see a beautiful woman in your avatar pic. You deserve to be treated better, and I wish you the best of luck in how this whole thing pans out. *hugs*

[My Lady Marsea]

I have just hit "send" like to the Ross corporate office link given in this posting. This situation is like so totally lame and uncalled for. They woulda had a fight on their hands right then & there as I held my phone in my hand and like demanded the number and called the regional office in front of everyone else. I'm like way past the embarrassment stage of who I am to tolerate this in any store I deal with.

To whom it may concern:
Dear Sir and/or Ma'am,
I just found out about how a fellow sister was treated at your store located at...Ross Dress For Less

18520 33rd Avenue W # A, Lynnwood, WA 98037-4726 (425) 771-0607
It seems she was publicly ordered to vacate the dressing room by your store manager. It appears from her account that there was much raised voice and drama involved by the manager. It sounds like there were customers who were there to witness the whole "situation". I believe that the sister involved would not be making this up as we tend to present ourselves in public in a discrete and proper manner, including buying our wardrobe from establishments such as yours.
I feel this could have been handled in a quiet, one on one conversation between the manager and the sister involved without the drama. I feel that she would have quietly left anyway and not set foot back into the store in light of the fact that store is obviously doing so good in the present economy that it needs no more revenue.
I live in the Yuma, AZ area and frequent the local Ross here and have never encountered a problem. It appears at this time the managers here are more sensitive to others and treat all with the dignity we deserve, because I would have really protested had it been a managers mistake to get on my case.
I like to believe you'll investigate this further and take steps to ensure it will never again happen in either the Lynnwood Ross store or any other.
Sincerely,
Marsea Petry

[JulieC]

Well, they appear to have stopped deleting posts from their Facebook wall. I'm sure things are spinning fast on this at corporate headquarters. They can't stick a finger in the leak in the dam on this one, and I think they know it now.

Yes, the store manager acted extremely poorly. Due to how viral this is going, I expect she'll be fired as the fall person, regardless of the circumstances, to give Ross a means of saying "We took care of that". But, the reality is they didn't take care of that. The store manager is not some shmo off street. Ross has trained that person, and obviously blew it in their training. This points to a systemic problem, rather than just a problem with a single manager. Not that they intentionally set out to discriminate, but at a minimum their training regimen is seriously lacking.