I have been busy lately and haven't been able to read all of the posts in the past couple of weeks, but it doesn't mean that you aren't in my thoughts. I thought I would share a little about some events which are still transpiring as I write this post.
I had tried to get back with my wife, but the attempts only addressed part of the issues we have. CD'ing was a small piece which she finally dealt with but the bigger issues were left. With no solution available we have decided a few days after the halloween party to move forward with ending the marriage. While this is a sad event, it finally provided me the closure necessary to begin moving on with my life.
9 days ago, I met a woman which has gone far beyond acceptance. We talked on the phone 9 days ago for 4 hours. I met the woman online at eharmony. There was nothing in my profile to let her know I was a cd'er, but there were hints. After our long phone call we went out to a nightclub for a few drinks then returned to my place to watch a movie. We were getting along so well I took a chance. I told her at 3AM on our first date that I was a cd'er. We ended up talking until 6AM when I finally took her home. She had dated another cd'er years before but couldn't deal with it and broke off dating but remained friends. For some unknown reason she accepted me and has gone far beyond. I never knew about the cd'er friend until I told her.
I cancelled a date that I had with another woman on Saturday and took this one out again. We talked some more but fell asleep talking. On Monday it was decided that she would find out about Michelle. She came to my house to see the pictures / closet / me. She came to the house and saw the pictures and progressed to the closet. She was surprised that it was as serious because it is 3-1 female in the closet. After a little more discussion, I changed my clothes in front of her so she would see the transformation. She had told me before that she would never hold hands or kiss me when dressed. She broke that rule rather quickly and kissed me. I asked her if she realized that I had boobs and she laughingly replied - "Yes I Do". The next day I got an email saying that we could be great girlfriends and asked if I wanted to go shopping. She has since told me how cool it would be if we went to Victoria Secret to shop together.
I went down to Colorado Springs Friday night to eat with some friends. After dinner I returned to her house. She had never seen me completely dressed and this was the night. I told her that I needed to go to Walmart to buy a few things and she wanted to go with me. I reminded her that I was dressed and she was comfortable with it. So off to Walmart we went. 2 girls doing some shopping and she loved it.
The biggest test came last night. The meetup group that I run was having our Christmas party last night. We had 41 people show up and she was a little overwhelmed. She got to talk to a lot of people including wives and girlfriends at the party. She left the party feeling more connected to me than before we started.
I am sharing this story because I am a very out person. Dating me isn't a safe decision, but even with those obstacles i told anyway. My honesty and telling her how the pieces fit together caused her to see the big picture. I gained acceptance beyond my wildest belief because I told early and laid it out for her. Women are tired of being lied to and an honest man can break through a lot of barriers. It must be true because I have told 4 women on dates and had 3 accept me. 2 of them went out with Michelle.
I wish all of you could feel what it is like to have acceptance of who you are. That would be the greatest Christmas gift of all.
Originally Posted by Melinda G
