I know why I crossdress. Why do we want to go public?

[Bootsiegalore]

I started going out because setting at home all dressed up is boreing as hell!! Amen!

[AmberM]

I desire to go out because I want to experience a girl's night out with my fiance and with other women, and to have a great time.

[sami1952]

I do it mostly because i have always felt like i was in the wrong body.I have always felt like a woman inside .

[JenniferR771]

Chiana--is on the right track--its validation. And... its also Pink Cloud number 2.
What do you want to happen when you go out in public? What would be ideal? Would you go out, if you expected no one to notice you at all? If you expected some disapproving faces or comments? If you were wearing slacks? Would it bother you if kids giggled?

Is there a progression from shy and careful (and boring) to bolder and more extreme? Is there an extinction effect? It just takes more to excite you each time you dress? If you wore slacks last week and no one noticed--would you wear a dress and heels this week?

[Amanda22]

Good topic (thanks for that). The primary reason I dress in public is because every time I do it the challenge is easier. I'm not sure I'm looking for validation; I just don't care much what strangers think. I never let others' influence my self-confidence, even way before crossdressing in public. Also, I feel I have every right to wear whatever I like. Wearing women's clothing makes everything in sync for me. Why keep that feeling confined inside the four walls of my home?

[DebsUK]

It's for acceptance I think. It's a bit of a rush too. It also makes clothes easier to buy because you can try them on. Oh, and I spent good money on my clothes so I don't want to be the only one who looks like them. In fact wearing nice clothes can be a little like putting loads of decorations on your house at Xmas. You can't see them, but other people do and get the benefit from that

[juno]

I don't really care that much about acceptance for myself. I want to get out to increase public exposure to make life easier for those who are afraid to come out. Unfortunately, my wife is less open to going out, so I can't do it as much as I would like to.

The real question is: why would you wear men's clothes going out if you like women's clothes better? The only negative part is not enough public acceptance, but there never will be if people don't get out.

[PretzelGirl]

Dressing is an extension of me. So I am okay with staying in and dressing if I was planning on staying in and doing something anyway. If I am planning on going out and doing something, then doing it dressed is a bonus (but not a given depending on what I am doing). So I don't do anything special other than Tri-Ess meetings when dressed. Just what I normally would do. Like about 3/4's of my Christmas shopping was done dressed this year.

[Pythos]

Oh Juno, you are so preaching my speel. LOL.

The more of us out in our stuff, the more it will be accepted. But the more we hide, the less acceptable and deviant it is.

[Rogina B]

And,I think many people are intrigued with us...I think all the out and about girls have someone they encountered that seemed genuine in their dealings with us..Could have been a salesperson or a cop or a bank teller or a hotel clerk,etc BUT THEY ARE OUT THERE!!

[Cheryl James]

I have made my mind up that I enjoy dressing and that I am going to continue to dress as much as I can. Now, I have a choice: dress and stay home or dress and go out. Going out is something I enjoy because it is like a test to see how appropriate my clothes are, how good my makeup job is, and how I present myself, in general. I like it and I have denied myself the opportunity too many times, so I'm going out. For those who don't want to, that's fine. For those who do, that's great, too. Life is short, enjoy.

[Celeste]

I feel it's a thrill and a challenge.I t also increases the chances of meeting other cd's. Usually 3 or 4 times in a year will work for me,just enough to take the edge off.

[Freddy12]

There is some danger involved - I could be seen by someone I don't want to know about my crossdressing - and that danger, for me is a thrill. That's the main reason I go out enfemme - the thrill caused by the danger.

[KateSpade83]

I go out in drag mainly to go shopping so I can try womens clothes on before I buy them. This also helps me not look like a "gay guy shopping for womens clothes," - a reputation I hate. I've gone to church in a skirt suit several times too because I went shopping afterwards. But one time an African family followed me into church and the son was thinking about hitting on me until he realized I was a man. I went to the grocery a few times in drag but and one guy almost hit on me too. But when I go shopping in drag sometimes I feel I can't hit on pretty women that way.

I like to go to church sometimes in a skirt suit to feel like I'm one of the women there... I have several beautiful church type skirt suits too.

[noeleena]

Hi.

Because im a woman ,

i meet many people, joined many groups womens ones to show others because we are different i can give of my self & allow others to see we are just people who are born different yet can be a part of socity like every one else,
talking to people ,in my case what its like being a woman born with both male & female thinking.

& having friends who accept you as a person first & then as a woman , & of cause to wear those so neat clothes, i dont pass as a good looking woman . so i gets the looks any way. & to have doors opened for you .

Now thats so neat. why do i do it

............Because i love it ...............

...noeleena...

[Rianna Humble]

What do you want to happen when you go out in public? What would be ideal? Would you go out, if you expected no one to notice you at all? If you expected some disapproving faces or comments? If you were wearing slacks? Would it bother you if kids giggled?

What I want to happen depends on my reason for leaving the house. If I am going to work, then what I want to happen is for me to get to work with time to spare, if I'm going shopping then what I want is to be able to find the stuff that I'm shopping for.

Ideal is for everything to go smoothly.

I go out all the time and most of the time the only people who notice are those I interact with (e.g. work colleagues, SA in a store...)

I have had disapproving stares, giggles and rude remarks, but I cannot let my life be ruled by idiots.

I have worn slacks when they went with my outfit but prefer something like a Salwar Kameez (as I am wearing today for work).

[Juliemckay]

I go out because I have stuff to get done.

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

Easy, because I look great and when you've got it, flaunt it!

[MarinaKirax]

I think I'm infatuated (attracted to?) the way I look as a woman.

There was a discussion a while back about the new psychiatric definition of transvestism - that some people are trying to have it defined as 'autogynophilia', meaning being attracted to or aroused by the image of one's self as a female. It plays in to the fantasy we have about living and interacting with others in a female personna. (Obviously this is relating to crossdressers, and not those who have a real desire or need to live fully and forever as female ---transsexuals) . Although many were really angry about this approach, I find it resonated with me.

I have tried to explain this to my wife, who wonders the same thing; why isn't dressing in private enough? I started by telling her that if there were no mirrors in the world, then alot of the joy of my dressing would be gone. My desire is to sink into a temporary fantasy of me as a sexy, sultry, curvy female, with all the trimmings like lacy lingerie, swishy skirts, sheer stockings and the click of killer heels. I like looking in the mirror and being surprised by the long haired siren blinking back at me. Maybe I could be her all the time. I look convincing enough, don't I? (my wife says I don't look quite that convincing....) but those questions lead to the desire to go out dressed - I want to fool other people into treating me as fully female, because it helps me reinforce my illusions. If I had fantasies about being a fireman, I might dress in fireman's clothes, but how much more exciting would it be to actually be treated like a fireman by others? Just my two cents. MK

[Sharon B.]

I have only gone out a few times but those times I did go out, felt wonderful like it is the right thing for me to do.
I felt a lot more comfortable in my feminine self than I have ever felt as my male self.
Maybe I am more transgender than I realize. In a different part of the country or state I may have live the rest of my life as a woman, but don't know if I want to do it here or not.

[Amy Hepker]

I just want to be a Girl, to be able to enjoy life the way I was supposed to in dresses and other female clothing. I have tried the female life and it is wonderful even though I do not fully pass it is so much more different than what a guy does. Girls can get away with so much more than a guy does also.

[kate dresser]

I like agree with karen, I like to go out and shop while dressed. Only have gone out 2 to a mall but looking in the womens section and accessories made me feel more at peace. When a sales lady looks at you while dressed even if they know I have to think that we put alot of effort and courage to go out. I believe they will explain and help you out alot more that just going in male mode. You can try on the clothes get the right fit, theres nothing worse that getting home and you dont like the way it looks on you. best of all if when you get home you realizes that is was a remarkable day.

[Alice Torn]

Great thread, and you give me hope! I have been out four times this year. I still am very nervous, and paranoid, because of my height, voice, Adams apple, people i know, who could make life tough. There is a thrill, some vanity in fooling others, but also a thrill to dress like woman once did, and thrill of being watched, admired. Most of the time, fear keeps me inside, though.

[Jilmac]

I go out dressed just for the sheer enjoyment.

[Terricd48]

Isn't it amazing that we try to look our best so we can pass yet gg 's seem to prefer the drab look.

Terri