well I just want to say thank you to all of you that have helped me out in this past month... I've been going thru a lot of bs and just personal things figuring out who I am... well I told my sister last night who Juli was... well I didn't tell her about "Juli" but I did tell her that I am girly.that I have a girl way of thinking things thru and just overall. that I wish I could wear what I wanted all the time. that I been like this since seven years old. I told her that I'm different and that I'm scared of it but its me... I'll tell you what... those 10 minutes were the MOST LONGEST 10 minutes I waited in my life to hear back what she was going to say... and she accepted it just fine... she actually felt so sorry that I've been going thru this alone for so long... I do not think she gets the severity of it yet... but at least i broke the ice with a family member... hell Finally a real person that I personally know! still a long way to go though... she kept trying to blame my mom about it but I keep telling her its not her fault... I am born like this and its just life's card I was drawn... She seems to honestly be sorry for giving me crap during our life and wants to help.. I do not know how she can but its nice to have someone now finally to maybe talk to a little. It was funny... she was like... "well I'm like a man.. I get mad to easy and I have mean tempers" lol she thinks we are switched some how lol. to good! but anyways THANK YOU!!! ALL who helped out and pushed me... I could of NOT OF DONE this without you that have helped me... I have read you're stories and hopes.. they have touched me greatly and have pursued me into my own oddassey to figure out who I am... thank you all for making it A LOT!!!! easier!!!! seriously, I am thankful that barrier I broke last night was the best feeling in my life. I love my sister so much. we are truly best friends and I wouldn't change that in the world.!!!!!