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Thread: Power to the NoHo, Non-Op!

  1. #1
    Member Seamus_Jameson's Avatar
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    Power to the NoHo, Non-Op!

    I preference this by saying that I am in the process of transition, eagerly awaiting the ability to take hormones. I want to transition, as do many of the men here.

    The brief point of my post is to remind the general trans(men) community that medical intervention is not always the best or even possible way to live as a man. I think that too often, we treat the inability to transition as a terrible tragedy. Don't get me wrong, this is sometimes the case. Also, sometimes we treat the lack of desire to transition as bizarre.

    But it misses the point.

    Masculinity (or femininity) just is. Nobody (except God) gave it to you and no one can take it away from you. Changing your body might make you happier or more comfortable, but you are a man (or woman) no matter what you look like. You have a gift that few cis men have--a living, breathing gender. You know exactly what it means to be a man (for you)--instead of relying on vague assumptions forced on him by society, just because he was born with a dick.

    Medically enhanced transmen often, I think, forget the spiritual in favor of chasing the physical. In contrast, without hormones or surgery, we see our gender essence in how we move, how we speak, how we carry ourselves, and most importantly in how we carry the ideals of our gender out to better the world, one man (or woman) at a time.

    No hormone, non-operational transpeople may be disadvantaged, but they are also privileged. So cheers to them and may they always feel welcome and REMEMBERED in the trans community.
    Quote Originally Posted by 4serrus
    If you look like the laundry basket threw up on you you're doing it wrong.
    Do you know every thought that crosses your mind? To know the mind of many is to know the depth of the ocean. Where at? What era? Why? It is to ask of heaven, how many stars? Those near, those far, those seen, unseen, heard by whom, in darkness, alone, or in sunlight, beyond? How far? Who cares? Our creator, over all seasons presiding, knows each mind by name.

  2. #2
    Quartermaster DanielMacBride's Avatar
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    Amen, brother. Well said.
    [SIZE="3"]Judging a person does not define who they are. It defines who you are. ~ Unknown[/SIZE]

  3. #3
    Silver Member gennee's Avatar
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    An excellent post, Seamus. I'm mtf transsexual who's not transitioning and am very happy as I am. The best to you.

    Gennee
    I'm getting better with age. I may have started late, but better late than never!

    "Don't let anyone define who you are".

  4. #4
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    Thank you Seamus, seriously, I have such bad, lonely days sometimes (read today, lol) where I feel like being me is precisely the worst thing I coud be. Going to remember this post next time.

  5. #5
    Aspiring Member NiCo's Avatar
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    Well said!

    I also find men or women who transition without hormones/ and or surgery to be very brave. I used to think 'WTF, why would they not?!' But then I grew up and realised it is not always possible for some/ and others may be comfortable how they are. So I wish every non-op/ and or non-hormones man or woman the very best, and RESPECT! You are strong people and should be very proud of yourself, no joke, no humouring; but the truth! Good luck
    [SIZE="3"]-Broken out of a window in hell-[/SIZE]

  6. #6
    Member Leo Lane's Avatar
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    Thanks for remembering us. Great, thoughtful post.

  7. #7
    Member Poltergeist's Avatar
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    Thank you for your post, Seamus.

    I'm not non-op by choice, so I can't really say that I'm happy the way I am... but I'm hoping that someday I'll get to a point where I'll be at peace with myself, at least.

    I often feel invisible as a transman, because I'm not transitioning and I don't pass. I might do if I pose the right way in front of the camera, and if I cut the photo off below my neck... but I don't pass "in person". I often feel like I am not taken seriously, and as if people are constantly pushing me back into the closet because my trans issues aren't visible. When I told people I would be unable to transition anyway, most replied something like "it's, ok, I never saw you as a man anyway". That didn't really make me feel better.

    But one of the worst things about it is that I don't feel like I am being accepted by the people I consider to be "my own", the gay/trans community. I always feel like I am "crashing the party", because I'm constantly met with the attitude, "you're still a woman and you like men, why are you here!". SO it's really nice to see a post like yours

    As I've tried to deal with the situation as it is, I feel that I've become extremely genderqueer... I always was, really, because I've always seen myself as a femme guy. This might sound crazy to some of you guys, but one of the things I used to look forward to after transitioning was that I'd be able to put on makeup and be read as a man with makeup. Anyway, the point I wanted to make is that this state of mind has been pretty good for me in some ways... It gives a feeling of freedom, and of having a unique chance to view the world around me in a different light. So maybe it's not all bad

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member NiCo's Avatar
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    Poltergeist, just because you have medical issues going on it doesn’t mean you are less of a man. Anyone who says you are, are totally not worth the time. Regardless of where you are in transition you are a man in my eyes. I hurt for you, cause I know what I was like pre-hormones-pre-op and it was horrible, but you are a very strong person to take news like that and still keep going regardless. You are an inspiration, the way you have dealt with news like that. I admire you [and believe me when I say that I am not patronising you, I swear to God].

    You can still have surgery? If so, then that may ease some of the frustrations. You will just have to put up with looking like a twink which I am sure you wouldn’t complain about

    The LGBT community can be quite harsh at times, especially against FtMs, so the fact you can’t transition the way you would have liked means that these idiots will use that. They are just bitter because they are jealous of you [and yeah it is not something you feel good about, but use it to attack them back next time they use it as a weapon ]

    I can totally feel you when it comes to the looking like a dude regardless if you wear make-up. I have done it, to see how much I have changed. I used to look like a typical normal female, good looking etc…but now, I just look like a TV when I wear makeup lol. I’m kinda gothic so I occasionally wear eyeliner…guyliner

    Anyway, just remember that you are always welcomed equally around here, and if anyone says anything out of place then just contact the mod team. They don’t put up with bullying of any sort.

    Take care bud!
    [SIZE="3"]-Broken out of a window in hell-[/SIZE]

  9. #9
    Fire what fire. mistunderstood's Avatar
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    Poltergeist tell them F@@k off. You can be who ever you want. Date who ever you want. They do not like it. Tell them to suck your packy. Hang in there. NEVER LET THEM TAKE YOUR SELF- ESTEEM AWAY FROM YOU. You are who you say you are. F@@k em.

  10. #10
    Member Poltergeist's Avatar
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    Thanks for the support, guys

    I won't be able to have top surgery unless I go abroad to have it, which is sooo unrealistic financially that it's not really an option.

    In some ways, transgendered people in Denmark have it easy, because IF they decide that they think you should be allowed to transition, the surgery won't cost you anything (but I guess that's what you get for paying more than half of your income in taxes). BUT the requirements to get accepted for hormones and surgery are pretty hard to live up to (being gay after your transition is a sure way to get a big "no" from them), and it's all or nothing... no hormones, no surgery... no surgery, no hormones. And if I had the money right now to pay for my own top surgery, I wouldn't be able to get it done with a Danish surgeon.

    A size reduction of my chest might be an option at some point.
    Last edited by Poltergeist; 02-25-2011 at 07:28 PM.

  11. #11
    Member Seamus_Jameson's Avatar
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    heh. glad I was able to cheer a few people up.

    @Poltergeist, Yes, make-up is awesome. (As long as it's not the old lady kind (no offense to old ladies!).)
    Quote Originally Posted by 4serrus
    If you look like the laundry basket threw up on you you're doing it wrong.
    Do you know every thought that crosses your mind? To know the mind of many is to know the depth of the ocean. Where at? What era? Why? It is to ask of heaven, how many stars? Those near, those far, those seen, unseen, heard by whom, in darkness, alone, or in sunlight, beyond? How far? Who cares? Our creator, over all seasons presiding, knows each mind by name.

  12. #12
    FTM ~ Andro ~ Boi Areyan's Avatar
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    this pre-op, pre-hrt guy wants to live in this thread... you guys are nicer than my mother! yikes. i dun have anything valuable to add here except another thank you. i also fully intend on medical transition in my future if it's possible but i've had to accept my place in life right now how it is with my current circumstances. i know this isn't forever and i'm making plans to attempt social transition in future even if i cannot transition medically for some reason. just like Poltergeist i want people to read me as male so i'm working on it. the binder helps, hiding half my face with dark sunnies helps, a few things do... the biggest thing that lets me down for myself is my lack of height. i'm midget short for a female and i know this dun matter to everyone but fuggit, i'm gettin' me some mens' elevated footwear. heh.
    [SIZE="3"]~ Androgynous/FTM/Boi ~[/SIZE]

    it's better to be hated for who you are than to be loved as someone you're not.



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