Even more encouraging signs

[Zoe Preston]

Quick recap of my encouraging signs post from a couple of weeks ago. Twenty years ago I told my wife that I was a CDer. She assumed I then stopped. But we never do, do we?

Two months ago I told her again. This time we talked properly - the "How to tell" thread was invaluable to me.

Recently she agreed to let me go for a photoshoot (Link to pics in sig) despite being fairly repulsed by the notion

So to the encouraging signs... Request #1 I asked permission to attend a support group - more a get together really - (It's 70 miles away so that helps) and she didn't object. I also floated the option of her coming along to verify that it's not 'sleazy' which seems to be a recurring concern of hers.

So far so good so I went for request #2. I explained that in some of my pictures I was wearing a really nice red pencil skirt (I felt darned sexy but I thought best not mention that) and had looked to buy one without success. I did however come across a gorgeous cocktail dress and said that I would like to order it and it would be delivered to our address. She didn't try to dissuade me.

So on to the even more encouraging signs....
I ordered the dress (Very cheap - like me ) but it is getting sent recorded delivery. So I explain to my wife that a package will arrive for me, No problem she says. It arrived the next day.

So here's something that I never ever thought I would say "Darling, would you mind staying down here while I go upstairs and examine my parcel
There was a little roll of the eyes - but no cursing or violence

Later that evening while we're cuddling I thanked her for being so tolerant of me and she asked if everything as OK. Actually, "No" I said. "It's to small" She just sighed - very loudly. (I should print out that I'm a UK size 12 and this dress wasn't )

Do I just decide to put up with something that's a little too tight under the armpits and across the bust? Not bleedin' likely

So I have to order a replacement. And I have to ask my wife to stay in to accept delivery again. Once again it arrives the next day.

Same script. Do you mind if I pop upstairs and examine my parcel? No grief, just a quirky smile and a suspicion of a Valley girl's "Ho-kay"

She never questioned why it took an hour. But let's be honest, you need the right under-garments for the shape, and hosiery, then a bit of foundation of course, naturally some eye-shadow, plus blusher. And I'd be naked without some lippy. And gloss. Then I need a wig, and shoes, oh and a belt. Might as well add some jewellery while we're at it

Now you're probably thinking I went downstairs to show my wife what I looked like? I was sorely tempted but didn't.

The following day we were in the bedroom and I was going to parcel up the first too-small dress. I said "I know you're probably not interested, but in keeping with the "No Secrets" rule do you want to see what I purchased?" She hadn't been paying attention to our first conversation (Or I wasn't clear enough) but she said "You bought a Red pencil skirt".

No I replied. I couldn't find one. But I did find this - and showed her the dress (Sorry, mental time out here. I never ever thought that I would show my wife a dress of mine )

She just went Oh. Then added, Ohhh, I wasn't expecting something like that.

And the world didn't end like I always assumed it would

Sorry, If I appear to be rambling, but for me it's significant progress.

Zoe

[Jaydee]

Zoe,
Congratulations. I think you handled it well. I only hope that some day I will be able to show my wife my purchases, and have her be accepting. Good Luck.

Jaydee

[Dragster]

Congratulations from me too Zoe. When do we see a photograph of you in the dress?

BTW, could you arrange for some of that acceptance potion to flow down the M6 a few miles, I could sure use a little on my wife. I also told her 20 years ago (after 20 years married), she thought it was "disgusting" and "didn't want to know", so I carried on hiding. She also thought I had stopped and was shocked when I made another effort to get everything in the open 6 years ago when I found this site. I bought "My Husband Betty" for both of us, as an aid to dialogue, but she really doesn't even want to talk about it. I'm not giving up on her, or on CDing; maybe one day the penny will drop but I'm not holding my breath!

BTW I love your avatar. I'm very partial to red pencil skirts myself (the tighter the better) and black satin blouses....and if there's a corset, suspender stockings and stilettoes in the mix too, then I'm in heaven!

Tony

[sissystephanie]

We are all waiting for the pictures, Zoe!!

I don't own a red cocktail dress, but after reading this thread I may have to order one! I do have a red skirt! I believe Red is supposed to mean Love, so be careful around GG's!

BTW, I told my late wife that I was a CD before we married and we had almost 50 happy years together! Yes, she fully accepted and supported Stephanie!

[Zoe Preston]

Thanks for the comments, but pictures will have to wait a while until I get my new wig (The one I'm wearing in my current avatar). Plus, I don't want to unsettle my lovely and increasingly tolerant wife by spending a few hours getting dolled-up and having a photo session while she's in the house. That's outside of her comfort zone.

Hopefully I should have pictures in a couple of weeks.

Zoe

[FluffyPersian]

Zoe, I'm sure you look great in your skirt.

But if she's tolerant of your dressing out of view, why not respect her wishes? Showing her your dress--even if it's not on you-- is pushing it if she was "disgusted" (as you said) by the idea of a photo session. It's natural to want to be complimented, but she's not the person to go to for that at this time.

Just one GG's opinion.