I have always been able to relate very easily with women. I don't understand everything, but I feel like I understand more than most guys. I have gotten in trouble over the years because I try to talk with women just like another woman. They end up taking it the wrong way. My wife for years thought I was flirting, but I wasn't.
Do you think this has anything to do with our connection to cd'ing? Does anybody else have this issue?
Michelle
Hi Michelle, Like you, I feel I can relate to women better then most men. Not sure it's because I amn a crossdresser, but I'm sure it has something to do with it. I think it is because I have a great deal of admiration and respect for women and never look down on them as it seems some men do; Like women are here to serve them or something out of the dark ages. Maybe that's why some women have confided in me things that they don't or can't confide in with their husband or other males. I don't think it's ever gotten me in trouble. But maybe some of them think I have a feminine side that they see even if I have not shared with them that I am a CD.
For me most definitely. Going back to high school have always been androgynous, esp on emotional side. I was one of the alpha males in HS, pres. of lettermans club....yet my social circle was a few close female friends, not dating. And thru adult life my only and close friends were/are female which yes caused marriage stress for the friendships and also looking back I was not the emotional male I think the spouse needed wanted, she didn't want a girl friend. As far as CD/TG, well it's a visual world too and dressing enables me to see what I feel.
Tara
I find it real easy to talk to GGs about anything, yes anything, they want to talk about as comparied to talking to men.
I fully understand. I have always seemed to get along with the women in the office rather than the men. Even when the kids were growing up I often helped out with PTA school functions, many times being the only man in the room. It almost feels like I have more in common with them then the men. There were a few time that my wife commented on the PTA events: "I think they would rather have you around than me". Even on some of the professional organizations, I tend to hang around with the women, I seem to be able to talk to them easier, and I feel kind of awkward around the men.
Looking back maybe it does have direct connection to the feminine side within us.
I have always been more comfortable talking to women than men. I relate more to the female gender emotionally, conversationally, subject matters, etc. I always look for a social bond.
I find that I fit in better with a group of females, rather than a group of guys, at a social gathering. Just kind of happens,lol! I have met a few gg's on line, at other sites, and we have nice conversations, girl to girl, and it's really a nice feeling!
"And if you want some fun, sing Ob-Bla-Di-Bla-Da!"
Maybe because you can be more open about your feelings around women as opposed to men. Which may also account for why cross dressers and transsexuals often don't see eye to eye on some stuff.Originally Posted by Laura Evans
xoxo
Michelle, I think you're on to something, but it's the other way around. It seems like the genesis of cross dressing causes our feminine interests and also the desire and ease of female connection. And I have been accused of flirting on many occasions, but I'm just more interested in what women feel and say than our male associates.
ChanDelle
It sure seems that way to me! No matter where I am or what I'm doing I feel more comfortable around women than men!
I've always felt more comfortable talking with women, but have also felt that they drew a line with how "deep" their conversations were with men. There is definitely a female-to-male conversational mode that is different from the female-to-female mode
My wife of 20 years recently observed that she always thought that I was more comfortable talking with men! I don't really understand this perception, but there it is.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
I kinda agree with this. Ive never been great at talking to people, men or women. But since discovering myself I feel a lot more at ease around women than I did before.
The ultimate woman is a man - House
I agree, I get along chatting with women at work and my wife's friends much better than male friends. Part of it is they are dealing with issues, events, clothes, etc. that I love too! I guess that is the CD fem side which I love! Actually I have had to bite my lip a few times with discussions on clothes as I think I new more about clothes so I did not want to over due it not sure what they would have thought! I think that the knowledge also comes from researching for my CD looks which I find to be fun! I guess girls have more fun!!
Last edited by Brenda Freeman; 03-14-2011 at 02:55 PM.
I agree whole heartedly. Usually at a social event, I can be found talking to the women much more than the men. I feel that I can relate to them easier and that they tend to be more interesting.
I don't think it's gotten me in trouble.
At one party in particular, all the husbands were downstairs watching Football while I was upstairs being invited by their wifes to come in the Livingroom and talk.
I wonder if they're sensed something that let them want to include me in their conversation. Hmmmm.
If I had to walk in and befriend a room full of strangers that were all women or a room full of strangers that were all men I'd sure feel more comfortable going into the room with the women in it, rather than the men. Lots of regular guys, who I don't know, together in a room usually makes me nervous.
I don't know if women see me differently than most men or not, or I'm making a "connection" with them or not, but before I was married it sure felt like it. I can't tell you how many times women have said they feel comfortable with me and have wanted to be my friend, but not have romantic relationship with me, and when I asked why, all my GG friends at the time (when I was single) have told me that they saw me as more like a girlfriend than anything else.
.
The River City Gems - Northern California's largest and most active crossdressing & transgender support group!
Me too and I would guess that it is related to the feelings behind CD'ing and maybe not the CD'ing itself. I like to think that having a feminine side myself has made me more respectful of women in general. I like their company and enjoy talking and LISTENING to them. I think this is key. Maybe this is stereotyping, but I think a lot of men (most?) don't really listen to (or at least don't pay attention) to women when they are speaking.
I don't think CD'ing has given me any kind of natural insight into women but listening to them has. I've never gotten in any trouble with this ease at conversing with women, but it has made more work for me at times. I was in a combat unit in the military when we first started to get women assigned to the unit. Since I had an easy time at working with the women in our supporting units, these first women were assigned to my crew. It worked out well for all.
I too would prefer to talk with a group of women over a group of men. To be honest, I have a pretty easy time talking with anybody however, when with the guys and the conversation starts approaching the asininely macho, I'm outta there! I just can't even fake interest anymore.
now that you mention it, i too connect well with women and think i understand things better than "most guys" so yes it could have something to do with cd'ing!
i mean hey if we want to wear the clothes i guess were more closer to women than regular guys. if i had my choice i would rather dress up and go out with a bunch of gg's rather than gather up the boys and do the usual thing at a bar or whatever.
Not sure it's the CDing, or just getting OLD, Michelle! But, I get along with women BETTER than I used to! Back in the day, I couldn't HAVE fem friends! Too much sexual t---e---n---s---i---o---n!
I DID used to think I was a "coati mundi whisperer" when I was young, tho! Does THAT count?
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
I have always been that that. I can remember very clearly sitting with the women at age 10 sitting with a group of women, including my Mom, just being one of the girls. Even now, at parties I am usually talking with the women instead of talking sports with the guys.
Funny you should mention that, Michelle...
I was at the barber's on Saturday, and all that everyone there was talking about was the questionable body check that Max Pacioretty of the Montreal Canadiens had suffered at the hands of Zdeno Charo of the Boston Bruins , resulting in a bad concussion and a broken vertebra. So, in their world, it was far more important to debate the pros and cons of the kind of body checking, gloves-off fighting, and goon tactics typical in NHL hockey games than - oh, I don't know - trivial stuff like the sad state of the economy, the impending next oil crisis, the instability in the Mid-East, the horrific earthquake/tsunami in Japan, the current war on public sector unions, and the on-going war on terrorism etc., etc. The testosterone in that room was so thick that you could almost cut it with a knife.
It suddenly occurred to me just how out of place I felt among all these "macho" men, how little I cared about NHL policies and politics (sorry, Karren!) and how much more I'd prefer having someone to discuss the current spring fashion trends in women's clothes or my latest nail polish find with. Clearly, a beauty salon with lots of GG patrons would have been a far happier environment for me under those circumstances...sigh!
What I have found is that I have a better understanding what women do every day in their lives. Such as having the right clothing, makeup, etc. Like how many men, besides CD/TG have worn bras, panty hose, heels, and shape ware for hours on end. To buy female outfits that look on them and what to wear under those outfits. Jewel, makeup, perfume, and hair. How many men can sit with their legs together for hours? How many men know how to make love to a woman like a woman wants? How many men have had a guy on top of them sticking there shaft up your bottom until they get their rocks off and then get up and go about their business? Let’s not forget many are underpaid.
I love knowing some what it is like being a woman.
I definitely am more comfortable with women than men in general. I have more in common with them as I prefer "chick flicks", love fashion, things like that. I don't watch or follow sports, with the exception of women's college basketball and have little to talk with men about. I also hang out in a chatroom with a bunch of guys I met while playing online games years ago. I tend to say things such as "the women in the next cube looks good in her pencil skirt today" and get responses like "what's a pencil skirt?". And when they post links to "hot women" I usually look at them and say to myself nice heels or skirt, etc.
The only exception to this is around guys in my hobby of model railroading. These guys I'm much more comfortable with as I actually have something in common to talk about. And, as much as I'd like to see more women in the hobby, they are very rare.
I grew up with four sisters (no brothers), so yeah, I do think I relate well with women. In school, though, I had trouble relating to them on a romantic level. I could talk as long as it was just friends, but as soon as I started to have feelings, I'd get tongue-tied. It seemed like I was always out of sync with them too. The ones I loved just wanted to be friends, and the ones who loved me were the ones I just wanted to be friends. It was a mess for awhile, but I finally got it sorted.
Being married makes things easier. I can talk to women now knowing that it's just friends and isn't going to be anything else. I wonder sometimes, though, whether my chattiness with them makes them think I'm flirting. I don't mean to, but it may come across that way.
I have always related to women very well all my life and since I have cross dressed most of my life then I am convinced it has soemthing to do with it and as I got older that ability to relate with women has got even stronger
I love women for being women in the first place, so love women as a man but I can sit and chat about all sorts that a lot of me men friends just can't do and it has been commented on many times
I have always found it easier to talk with women. I think they sense that I am different than most men and accept me better for it.
[SIZE="4"]Mary Jane[/SIZE]
May those that love us, love us. Those that don't love
us may God turn their hearts. And if he can't turn their
hearts, may he turn their ankles, so we'll know them by their limping.
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