Some advice from GGs in particular

[FionaO]

A while back I posted a photo of me in one of my wife's best outfits and was severely criticised by the GG's in particular. However I did realise that most of the criticism was justified. So now I have a question.
Last week I met my wife in town as we had an appointment with the bank. She got there earlier than me and looked around the shops. I was early as well so when we met we went back to a dress shop which was having a great sale and asked my advice on a particular dress she had seen earlier. I thought it was really nice and suggested she buy it. However she didn't have time to try it on, so after our appointment she returned to store and I went back to work.
When I got home later she told me that she hadn't bought the dress after all as she didn't like it as much when she tried it on. I expressed disappointment but I already knew she hadn't bought it but didn't tell her. Here is my dilemna.
I had gone back to the store after work and as the only dress in her size was still on the sales rack I knew she hadn't bought it. In fact there was only one other copy of the dress in two sizes bigger, which was my size, so I bought that one.
It was a real bargain and I'm wondering if I should have bought the one in her size anyway and given it to her? I do buy her dresses occasionally most of which she likes. She is aware of my dressing and has seen me many times although is not fully accepting. Should I let her know that I have bought this dress or even let her see me in it. Would she feel bad that it looks fairly good on me (I think) but it didn't on her? (She is quite short and has problems finding clothes that suit her) I have attached a photo to give a reference point.

[Eryn]

EDIT: Oops, I misread your subject line and didn't realize that you were seeking advice from GGs. Sorry!
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First of all, that dress looks great on you! You've pulled together a great look.

Now, as far as sharing it with your wife, you've created a interesting situation. She's already rejected it for herself and if you were just another GG friend she probably wouldn't have an issue with you buying it as it is better for your body type.

The problem is that you aren't just another GG friend. If you show her the dress there are several bad assumptions that she can leap to. She might think that you were disappointed that she didn't buy the dress and this led to you buying it for yourself. Seeing the dress might be a reminder of how she looked in it when she tried it on and rejected it. All sorts of tangled misunderstandings are possible so I think that she should not see this one for a while, at least until her memory fades.

Now, that being said, my (accepting) wife came across a dress that she had purchased several years ago and that she didn't particularly care for. She gave it to me and said that she was very happy that I looked great in it. The key difference in my situation is that she already owned the dress!

[SusanLaine]

The look of this dress and the entire outfit is wonderful. It looks pretty , feminine and very much what I think any woman would feel pretty wearing.

[mourningdove]

If she wasn't really smitten with the dress, it could be ok. But I think if it were my husband who bought a dress I was looking at to wear for himself, I'd feel sort of "one-upped". Personally, I'd return it. It's just not worth the drama that could ensue.

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

I know you were mostly looking for GG's for advice, but here's my two cents on it. The fact that you are even concerned enough that it could be an issue really, to me, feels like it's probably not worth it. Even if it isn't a problem for her, there are other dresses out there that you won't have to start a thread about.

[Leslie Langford]

If she wasn't really smitten with the dress, it could be ok. But I think if it were my husband who bought a dress I was looking at to wear for himself, I'd feel sort of "one-upped". Personally, I'd return it. It's just not worth the drama that could ensue.

I realize that the intent here was for GG's only to respond, but I have to agree with mourningdove.

My wife is aware of my crossdressing and is grudgingly tolerant of it. One of the things that rankles her about it is that my female wardrobe is far more extensive than hers. But that's her choice, not mine. She is free to buy whatever she wants, but doesn't happen to enjoy shopping nearly as much as I do, nor do her tastes run in as "girly" a direction as mine.

It pains me that often when I am out shopping, I will see an item of clothing that I think would look terrific on her, but I have to resist the urge to buy it for her. The reason is that I was given strict instructions years ago to never again buy her any articles of clothing for Christmas, birthdays, Mother's Day etc. because of the irrational fear that I might be buying the same thing for myself in my size, and that would just be too creepy in her view. The irony here is that she has never seen me in "Leslie" mode nor ever plans to, so this really is a bit of a moot point.

Funny thing, though - back in the days when I still had "permission" to buy her clothing, she invariably got lots of compliments from her female friends or co-workers on the items that I had purchased for her. Go figure...

[Babeba]

If she's already decided not to buy it for herself, I wouldn't buy it, either. She had her reasons not to buy it, and clothes really DO look different on the rack as opposed to off; I'd trust her judgement as to whether or not it was worth buying. If she had said, 'It's beautiful, but it just costs a lot and I'm not sure' I would think about putting it away for a special gift for her - but if she's worried about the expense of ONE dress, how would she feel about TWO? Not so good, I imagine.

Also - matchy matchy outfits are kind of touch and go for some GGs. It might be weird for her to not get a say in having the same dress as you.

[Diane Smith]

Stick it in the closet, wait a couple of years, and then show it to her again. Most likely, she will have forgotten about the whole incident by then and will think it looks great on you (which it does).

- Diane

[noeleena]

Hi,.

As a woman while reading this i thought before i got to the end, ooops for me thats a no no, because in our minds or mine i would think your trying to out do me because i really would have loved = that dress or other ,
& your showing me your better than i ..., because i can wear that..... youv pull the rug out from under me.

I would be disapointed , i like the dress & think its lovely,

What i would do first is ask your s o if she;d mind if you brought it for your self , then your cleared .

I see other women wear some pretty nice clothes yet im very hesitent to try them on , i have a good dress sence yet i dought my self in some clothes,

Prove me wrong by asking your s o.

Like your s o i know what suits me, so i stay with that,

...noeleena...