I'm 100% hetero but at the same time I wish I was born a girl (then of course I'd simply be a lesbian) if that makes any sense...
For me I never had any doubt about my sexual orientation so I have the ability to provide an honest answer to myself or a poll.
Being a CD did give me doubts about my gender identity and I did a long journey that involved many laps in the closet and lots of hiding.
I also spent a long time in denial wondering when I would outgrow this ect ect
Its not a matter of being dishonest its just a matter of not knowing and being unable to provide an honest answer to myself let alone a pollster.
If they had a confused category that would have fit for many years and sometimes today.
Its like watching any game show some questions you just know the answer and can provide a quick honest answer ; others are allot harder :-)
I think what the polls prove is that there are gay and straight CD's and you have to treat CD's like individuals.
Last edited by Cari; 09-08-2011 at 08:02 PM.
I find it funny that people here say that if they were born female they would be lesbian...wanna bet on that? If you were born female with female anatomy and hormones, you would probably be just as straight as you are now. Strange that you think you would be attracted to women if you were a woman.
If you had the same brain you have now and hormones with female anatomy...then you would probably be a FtM TS
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
Completely hetero CDer here.
I can't really understand why women are attracted to men, though I am not complaining as I have been happily married for 22 years!
Estrogen must be a heck of a drug!
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
I think of myself as hetero, but often find myself attracted to androgynous women. ( Jamie Lee Curtis anyone? ) Actually I think it might be that I'm attracted to a masculine attitude? Jerri Ryan as Seven of Nine could always interest me, but when she was in some of her other roles there was less attraction ( Though that could have something to do with those uniforms! ) I don't want to be with a man, but would probably not have a problem dating a MtF that had fully transitioned.
Does that make me 100%? Dunno.
I started crossdressing around age 13, and for me, the entire reason I got into dressing up to begin with was my intense desire for women. When I was younger, I was an awkward kid. Never had a girlfriend until I was 19. So for many years I didn't know what it was like to be close to a girl, or anything like that. All I had were fantasies, fantasies of being with a girl, being seduced...and in my fantasies the women seducing me were always wearing lingerie, probably because of me discovering Playboy for myself when I was 13. Somehow I found myself being just as turned on my the lingerie as I was the women. So wearing lingerie became the closest I could get to a girl.
For some, crossdressing is pretty much just a sexual turn-on, not a gender identity issue. For those that dress up for purely sexual reasons, it's usually because they love women so much. Weird way of showing it, I know, but there it is.
Having sex with a man is... well... (shuddering violently) not my cup of tea. There are many here that are into that and that's fine. We're all different and what they do doesn't bug me at all. Not that what I think should matter anyway. Now, for me? I see nothing remotely attractive about a man or his (ahem) member, let alone doing something with him or it. This is regardless of what I may be wearing. Pretending to be a girl is one thing, getting it on like one with another man is something else altogether. Now, if the wife wanted to say... be the dominate one... I might be OK with that, it probably would be kinda fun!
Ginger
How long have you been with him?
If you spent many years with him, had sex with him, shared your life with him, would it change your relationship dramatically if you find out he has a (potential) homosexual tendency?
Does it make any sense to you?
I can only speak for myself. I've never been in an homosexual relationship, I've never tried, I've never looked after it, I haven't done efforts to stay away from it. I'm sure most people would say that I'm pretty straight, even when I'm wearing lace panties. However, I'm not so sure about it and probably I'll never find out.
Wow - that's the exact same reason I started being a woman, except I was 12 at the time and I stumbled across my dad's secret stash of Penthouses rather than Playboy. I was so intensely aroused that I wanted to be the woman in the pictures just to feel what they're feeling sexually. That was that, and since then I've this intense desire to be woman so I can feel and experience everything female - for me CD has always been a very sexual experience for me. And I don't think I can get arouse any more unless I'm in full out female form. But at the same time I have no desire to be with a man, but I want to be a woman and feel everything woman if that makes any sense. I even have girl `toys`if you know what I mean
Last edited by Mrs Roads; 09-09-2011 at 05:39 PM.
CindyO,
welcome to the forum, I believe that you will find most CD'ers are Hetrosexual, as its just the wearing of womens clothing that they enjoy, most I know are married,.. on here or those who are widowed, a great many are divorced, but CD'ing is not usually the cause for Divorces,...as you interact here you will find the different level of CD'ers/trans gendered people.
I knew before I got into the relationship I had with CF, so knowing up front it didnt bother me one way or other, he told me he was definitely a hetrosexual male but loves
wearing womens clothing. Its how he is happy with his feminine side,.. as with the others some havent got to that stage others have.
I believe if you have communication always with your husband and tawk tawk all the time,... so as you can both deal with where he is and for you to understand, him
and how you cope with it all....some do question themselves as to if they are straight or otherwise, as CF told me about his experience, and he knew up front
that he was a hetrosexual male.
The only thing ill say here he can wear heels better n me.... drat lol....its a wonder he doesnt break his neck but practice makes perfect hey....lol
Have you joined the FAB section, you will find a huge amount of support from the other GG's as well.
There are lot of CD'ers here that also do give good advice, so you can read through, to see what pertains to your situation.
Enjoy the forum...
Irene shesadvl yup thats me
love your quick wit.... made me laugh ....
Last edited by shesadvl; 09-10-2011 at 11:53 PM.
"A day without red wine is like a day without sunshine.."
when the devils feet hit the floor you can hear the good lord .. say "awwww crap shes up"
Eleanor Rooservelt "behind every man stands a woman"......
but then in my devlish attitude behind everyman stands many women depends, on many things or how he/she dresses..laffing
Remember, strength based in force is a strength people fear. Strength based in love is a strength people crave.
Easy to answer this one: 100% hetero. 100% attracted to women as long as I can remember. 100% married for 30 years.
-- Jenny
Actually i am completely hetero. Also in femme mode i only like women but - my last dreams consisted of situations where i was a woman and a man was making rough love to me. So what does that mean? am i gay? in male mode i cannot imagine to be gay, to have sex with a man but in femme and my dreams it happen to occur more often now that a man is making love to me. What does that mean?
I am more of a CROSSDREAMER than anything else.
Yes Reine, then i feel different. But is this normal?
I am more of a CROSSDREAMER than anything else.
I am not Gay, never have been never will be, I am only interested in GGs.
Ladies have a GREAT time!
Smile GOD LOVES you!!!
GOD BLESS US ALL!!!
AMY Hepker
ROSES ARE RED
VIOLETS ARE BLUE
I'LL BE ME
AND YOU BE YOU
This is a very interesting question and both CDs/TGs and their partners go across the spectrum. Often, it's assumed that CDs are gay because the most public cross-dressers are "Drag Queens", who are often gay men who dress up to entertain gay men.
Even my own sexual preferences and identity are hard to define. In my fantasies I am always dressed as a beautiful woman, in heels, hose, skirt, satin blouse, jacket, lipstick, make-up, and beautiful hair, and my partner is similarly dressed, usually a bit taller, and perhaps a bit heavier. She is also more aggressive, seducing me more than I am seducing her, but both of us taking our time, kissing, caressing each other, enjoying the sensations of each other's bodies, as well as the clothes. Even the sexual fantasies are Lesbian fantasies. But for years, the final moments, with the clothes off, I would still have real breasts, but we would be having coitus. It was only when I got older and discovered certain toys, that I realized that I liked the alternatives even better than the "real thing".
As for my partners, there is no question. All of those who have enjoyed being with me and stayed in long-term relationships, were bisexual and had had pleasant experiences with both genders at some time in their lives. They were attracted to me because I took my time and was in no rush, and willing to take lots of time to make sure that she was completely satisfied. On many occasions, I could be completely satisfied by pleasing her so much that she was unable to even move afterward, let alone reciprocate. I loved the "quavering jello" experience where all she wanted was to be held and hugged afterward.
I've never been into men. I experimented a few times, but didn't enjoy the experiences. The men who were attracted to me were also bisexual, and very much attracted to the fact that I could look and act like a woman and still have the sense of responsibility of a man.
Transsexuals, especially those who have gone through SRS are often much clearer about their sexual preferences. They are either lesbians or women attracted to men. They have wiped out all aspects of being male, except, perhaps, for a stronger libido than than most women. Often, their partners, even if they know the girls were once men, relate to their partners as women, and if anything just loves that she seems to know how to make their partner happy. This is because she has been able to experience love and sex as both a man and a woman.
Very often, early stages of dressing are closely associated with sexual arousal, but often, the driving force behind the desire to dress quickly goes far beyond just sexual desire. They enjoy experiencing the vulnerability, sensitivity, and other aspects of being feminine. Often, this shift starts to happen when they sexually satisfy themselves, but keep the outfit on afterward.
Often, the feminine desires can extend to many other activities. TGs will often enjoy "chick flicks", enjoy cooking, cleaning, crafts, even sewing, doing laundry, and have a better sense of hygene. They will also be more aware of their physical appearance and will want to control their weight, figure, and appearance. They are more likely to exercise, eat healthier diets, and take care of their bodies. In relationships, TGs are more likely to listen to women as they express their feelings, more interested in "girl talk", and often have many female friends who are not sexual prospects. Often, when a TG or CD sees a girl in a beautiful dress or outfit, they are looking out the outfit, and wondering what it would be like to wear that outfit, even BE that woman, or at least have a figure like hers.
Many TGs will also be less interested in spectator sports such as Hockey, Football, Baseball, or Soccer. They might even be more interested in sports like Figure skating, Gymnastics, or competition dancing, cheer leading, or other dance activities. They are more likely to participate in non-competitive physical activities such as dancing, yoga, Aerobic dancing, Jazzercize, or Zumba.
Given even a little encouragement, CDs and TGs can become extraordinary lovers because they are willing to take direction, because their masculinity isn't threatened, because they aren't as attached to it. In many cases, they will try to act masculine to hide their feminine traits and desires.
You got that right. The actual experience of being a lesbian is not the same as being a hetero guy visualizing how cool it might be to be a lesbian.
Ever go to a lesbian bar? Ever notice how, on average, the girls have a different sort of look from the girls in straight bars? This raises the issue of a difficult truth: Sexual orientation and gender identity are not the same thing, but they are related. If one shifts, the other can too. I've known plenty of folks who, after transitioning, switched to 100% men. How about them pink apples?
As for me, I'm "half gay, half girl" (bisexual crossdresser). I can't date manly men, but I do like tall, smooth, and pretty guys. Also I can't date girly girls. They have to be sort of tomboyish. My "either/or" sexuality is a mirror of my "either/or" gender, and I think that's the truest equilibrium I may ever find on the spectrum. Inside and out.
I think your wrong there. Sports use to be a male oriented years ago, but not today. When you go to a sporting event today, i see allot of women there, even grandma's at hockey games. Women enjoy sports today more that ever, so why would a TG not like sports. I even realize there are some males who do not like sports at all, but I am a transsexual and i still enjoy sports.
Last edited by chloe23; 10-22-2011 at 04:46 PM.