Fists of Rage

[Persephone]

The regular monthly dinner meeting of my women's group took place tonight. Normally we have a "no men at the table policy" and if there are husbands (most often it is the same two) who are going to wait for their wives they usually go off and sit together and have dinner.

Tonight, because of space limitations at the restaurant the two guys were allowed to sit at the women's table, placed next to each other in the corner so that they would have someone to talk to. Otherwise, except for their wives, they were ignored.

I was diagonally across from them and could hear snatches of their conversation. One of them was talking politics and was making the kinds of statements that "he" (my boy self) would normally respond to.

I know there are women who are perfectly capable of wading into such a situation, ready to do battle with men, but most of those are not in my age group.

And I also knew that if I got into the conversation "he" would bust loose in ways that would be most unladylike. I couldn't afford that.

So I had to ignore the guy and his comments and continue the pleasant social conversation with the women around me.

But I have to say, the "boy inside" was slamming his fists against the bars of the cage I keep him in.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Shelly Preston]

Persephone

I am curious if you think getting involved with the conversation would have changed there opinion
Sometimes I hear guys talking and I know talking to a brick wll would be easier

Having said the I am glad to hear you took the dignified approach

[noeleena]

Hi,

Hmmm thats interesting slamming of fist's or trying to get out. by what your saying is you can not show your male ness . oh dear.

im with a good number of groups. & every one knows my background. never a problem.

Last night we had 8 of us who are women we meet every month & do all sort,s & we look at doing different things so i said what about coming to our home & do some wood work . wood turning & what ever youd like to do. they said oh we'll need some timber well i have plenty to choose from . so we will do that soon. plenty of machinery & so on ,

we can talk about any thing & every thing , oh allmost for got ....no .... men allowed. just women. yet im the builder. done my time & teach other's so there you go.

next mounth its about wedding & mothers of the bride wear.
so i asked are we going dressed to the bulding or get dressed there, i'll just walk there in my mother of the bride clothes . funny as i have just made this outfit for our Edwardian group & thought it will work just nicely its about haveing fun & we do..& i have shoe's to match. hat = bonet

Oh dear hand bag , for got that. i'll make & sew one up. cluch bag,, will do..

thinking, why could you not have a nice quiet talk with the men could not afford to do that.. that pose's a ? im wondering why not . a back lash then,

...noeleena...

[Wendy_Marie]

Persophone.
I understand what your saying...and where these thoughts/feelings are coming from. It seems for me that my two alter ego's form together more and more into one cohesive entity..but there are times when male machoness and bravado tend to turn my normally docile Bruce Banner persona into the Hulk..without warning.

I have found that when I am around other Genetic Women...I still tend to be overly protective...perhaps it's just what some would consider old fashioned chivalry...but I look at more as instinctual behavior....where the most capable member of the herd steps up to defend the rest of the group.
I'm not saying that I am necessarily the most capable person in the group...but in a situation as you described...it would be difficult not to respond to commenst which you disagree with regardless of what attire you may be presenting in for the occasion.

Thats why I have a strict policy against talking with most anyone (Especially strangers) regarding Politics and Religion....two topics which seem to cause the most trouble in my experiences.

Hope you get your perosnal demons worked out....as for me it's been along time since my inner boy overruled my outer girl...and I hope it stays that way.

[suchacutie]

One of the hardest parts of living in two genders, initially, was putting up with my male life intruding on Tina's time when she was en femme. My wife is very protective of Tina and tries to run interference but if I'm en femme and my parents are suddenly on the telephone, there is no way to avoid shifting the mind into male mode, even though I can still feel the lipstick as I talk to them! Then, when the call is over the need to shift back is overwhelming but if they have raised issues that need to be discussed it can be hard to put them aside! One day it got so confused Tina just stripped in frustration and got into the shower, heading back to male mode in 10 min!

But those issues aren't as subtle as the ones being discussed in this thread. Here's how my wife taught me to handle what we're talking about here: She and I (in drab) were sipping coffee and talking about a set of issues, after which she suggested Tina "come to visit". An hour later she and Tina are sipping coffee and the conversation goes back over the same ground. Tina mentioned that these topics had just been discussed, but my wife said, "well, I expected that Tina could have different views, looking at things from a feminine perspective!"

Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather! My wife opened a whole new world by suggesting that my femininity was very much more than skin deep. Not only that, my wife was correct! Tina did have some different opinions, some radically different. This one incident started Tina significantly down the road to being her own person.

So, part of the process of "making a life for Tina" was an introspective look at everything that my male self held dear, and we found that Tina's perspective could be incredibly refreshing, and very different. You might have fun giving this a try!

[carhill2mn]

I recently had a similar situation where I politely "bit my tongue". I was in the waiting room of a car dealer waiting for my car to be serviced. Two men were discussing some topics about which I was familiar. It was evident at times that they were either
mis-informed or not knowledgeable about the subjects. I just smiled to myself, lady-like, and continued to read my paper!

[Sophie86]

I'm curious as to whether their comments were in the vein of expressing intolerance for alternate lifestyles, races, creeds, etc; or whether they were more generic comments on political policy. I'm used to ignoring the latter, but I would have a hard time ignoring bigotry. Still, I probably would do it just to keep peace at the table.

[Maria2004]

talking about your deepest and most sincere feelings is a kick and ban offense, you only have to read back in all the years this forum has been online to know this is true, the latest crop of moderators will see to it this post will be lost, this forum was created by CDs/TGs for CDs/TGs, not spouses or partners so it's original support intention has been lost and the non Trans get their revenge, you will know when I'm finally kicked, read the name of the one who did. It would be an honor to join the many original members who have been.

Deletes Link

[Cynthia Anne]

No one said being a lady was easy! Keep the 'boy' in his cage! Perhaps that's where all who talk politics should be!

[PretzelGirl]

But those issues aren't as subtle as the ones being discussed in this thread. Here's how my wife taught me to handle what we're talking about here: She and I (in drab) were sipping coffee and talking about a set of issues, after which she suggested Tina "come to visit". An hour later she and Tina are sipping coffee and the conversation goes back over the same ground. Tina mentioned that these topics had just been discussed, but my wife said, "well, I expected that Tina could have different views, looking at things from a feminine perspective!"

This brings to light an interesting point that has been discussed as side notes in many topics. For you, it appears that there is a shift in your thought processes when you dress. You (and correct me if I misread this) shift from him to her when you dress. There are others, and I include myself in this group, that maintain the same reflections in either mode. It is an interesting point and probably roots itself in some form into our need to dress. But that is one of those things we just accept it for what it is as we will probably never figure it out.

[kimdl93]

I don't know if its the boy inside...its probably the inner child. It took me a long time to realize that getting angry doesn't win arguments and arguments seldom, if ever change minds. If I got into an argument with every individual that expressed rigid, narrow-minded and factually erroneous opinions, I'd be busy full time and accomplish nothing.

Be grateful that your outer woman silenced your inner child

[juno]

This brings to light an interesting point that has been discussed as side notes in many topics. For you, it appears that there is a shift in your thought processes when you dress. You (and correct me if I misread this) shift from him to her when you dress. There are others, and I include myself in this group, that maintain the same reflections in either mode. It is an interesting point and probably roots itself in some form into our need to dress. But that is one of those things we just accept it for what it is as we will probably never figure it out.

I am like Sue. I really don't have a separate male self on the inside. I often go to groups with my wife and am tolerated as a male because I don't really act like one.

However, I don't think that distinct personalities are at all mysterious. For example, it is very common for some people to become aggressive jerks when they are driving, or consider men at sporting events. Multiple personalities are normal. It is only a mental illness when the personalities don't know each other. Well, that doesn't really mean you can figure it out. Just remember that it is normal for people to change personalities depending on the environment or situation.

It is known that males have less left/right brain hemisphere communication. My theory is that the typical M2F crossdresser has the male persona in the dominant left hemisphere, and the female persona primarily in the right hemisphere, giving the two personalities a much stronger separation than other typical forms of multiple personalities. It would be interesting to see if right-handed crossdressers use their left hand more often when dressed.

[donnalee]

I don't know if its the boy inside...its probably the inner child. It took me a long time to realize that getting angry doesn't win arguments and arguments seldom, if ever change minds. If I got into an argument with every individual that expressed rigid, narrow-minded and factually erroneous opinions, I'd be busy full time and accomplish nothing.

Be grateful that your outer woman silenced your inner child

Yeah, but sometimes you just can't help yourself. I, unfortunately, am one of those who can't let an untruth or mistruth stand; it's just not in my nature. I realize with many people this is a total waste of time and gets people angry with me for no logical reason, realize it's a fool's errand and pointless to boot, tell myself repeatedly not to do it now or ever (it never ends well) but still............
"Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and irritates the pig." - Robert Heinlein