before my wife gets home. She knows I dressed up today when I worked from home, but I'm still super embarrassed. Married a year and a half, together over 3, known each other for 10, and she's known for like 8. Yet here I am...
/rant
So I've filled myself with liquid courage...
before my wife gets home. She knows I dressed up today when I worked from home, but I'm still super embarrassed. Married a year and a half, together over 3, known each other for 10, and she's known for like 8. Yet here I am...
/rant
Show her the smile that dressing up puts on your face! Maybe she will smile too.
She's probably cooler with it than I am.
I've just seen so many posts here and other places about people who tell their SOs and then their life revolves around it. Don't wanna fall into that trap, y'know?
At first coming out will be the number one thing wether said or unsaid.
Then one day day things will go back to some sort of normal.
It was tough at first when I came out but once she saw I was still the same person everything worked out.
P.S. Being drunk when she comes home won't help.
my wife puts up with the dressing, and doesn't seem to mind at all, but the liquid courage would not go over very well. Maybe she would be OK with it all, without the alcohol, better than she will be with it?
Tina B.
Magic is the art of changing consciousness at will.
I have been married for 27 years and my wife found my stash of clothes in April. She is mostly OK with it; I think I am more embarrassed about it than she is. It is getting easier for both of us. I have been much happier and have been sleeping better at night since being able to dress and not having to hide all the clothes. At this point, I do not want her to see me in a skirt or dress. I do wear nighties to bed and I wear panties all the time, as well as sport bras when I ride my bike or work out. She does all the wash, so I am not doing anything she doesn't know about, I just don't thrust it in her face.
Drinking will only make it seem better for a short time, eventually it will be time to accept the reality that cannot be changed.
Life's too short to not be enjoyed! Live each day to the fullest!
Drinking never helps hon. Just be honest and talk to her. Listen to her. And you both will.work it out.
Before my wife found out I was very sneaky about it while I tried to build up confidence to tell her. One night she went toe bed early, I had a few strong drinks and fell asleep on the couch in her dress. Finding out like that was horrible for her, and could have very well cost us our marriage if she wasn't so accepting
Amen to that! There are times when you need to keep your wits about you. This is one of them!Originally Posted by StaceyJane
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
Ashley,
First of all, recognizing that you need limits and boundaries is 90% of the way toward not falling into them. If you can't see the trap, you can avoid it! Congratulations.
As others have said, drinking won't help it. When have your wits about you again, you need to have a conversation with yourself and then have it again with your wife. It would do you good to understand what limits you feel you need to place on your CDing. Talking with your wife not only helps you validate your thinking, you loving wife will help you keeping within these boundaries. BTW, boundaries are something that I would suggest are something many of us here need and are unwilling to admit. You have come a great distance toward the balance we all seek.
Leann
Leann
Enjoy who you are but stay safe.
Drink and dress..... You could loose your license or worse yet.... Drop your tranny! What ever you do don't pop out from behind the bar and yell "Surprise".
Hi Ashley, Who are you trying to fool yourself or your wife ???
Orchid
Ashley, your major problem is that you haven't accepted the fact that YOU are a crossdresser!! You may have been doing it for some years, but from what you said in your OP, and the fact that you are drinking before meeting your wife, shows clearly that you have not accepted that you are a CD!! Obviously you are or you would not be on this forum. But that still does not mean that you have accepted it completely!!You know you dress, she knows you dress, so what is left?? Why in the world should you be embarrassed by her seeing you?? Maybe the 2 of you need to have a good conversation about your dressing!! But with no drinking!!!!
Stephanie
Lady on the outside, but man underneath!
Men should be embarrassed about watching wrestling. Crossdressing takes style and some intelligence. It is a good thing.
Juno Michelle Krahn
Normal people are weird. Stealth is another word for "in the closet".
I like that! Wresting is soo fake! There's nothing fake about 'dressing' and being honest about it! Don't hide behind the bottle! Hugs!
If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:
I understand the desire for some liquid courage. I agree with the fact that it really isn't healthy, but maybe the alcohol isn't as bad as not being open to your wife. If it takes a bit of courage the first time, then so be it. I'm glad that you're working through it with your wife. Before not that long ago, my wife and I were sort of "Don't ask, don't tell", she knew but hadn't seen me dressed in years, etc. Things feel a thousand times better now that I'm completely out with her and the first night I was dressed and just hanging out with her I had a few drinks as well.
As for the crossdressing becoming "all consuming", I was worried about that too but as of yet that has not been the case at all. I'm sure it could become so if you wanted it to be, but there is so many other things to enjoy in life as well. Have a nice time with your wife and please let us know how things are going.
Ameli
So you'll be dressed when she gets home? She will walk in the door to see you dressed for the first time?
I don't really have the experience, but I would think it would be easier to get dressed in front of her, even have her help, then to just have her walk in to see you or for you to dress and then walk in on her.
"Honey, I want to dress for you, but I want you to help me do it. You can pick out my clothes and help me with my makeup."
[SIGPIC]http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=82706&dateline=137762 0356[/SIGPIC]Linda
I was thinking the same thing. Better get the coffee.
"I am the beginning and the end. I bring order into chaos. "
"I never tell the truth, because I do not believe such a thing exists. Truth, is in the eye of the beholder."
"Since my customary farewell would appear oddly self serving, I shall simply say, good luck."
"We give no crap, and we take very little."
I concur! It seems that your wife is quite aware of your dressing. Was /is it your intention to meet her at the door - en femme and "lubricated" - without any convesation with her? I think that's thats the wrong path. She's known for 8 years...so give her some credit for making the choice to marry you and the opportunity to decide if she wants to be part of this to a greater extent.
Well Ashley there you go
I was written there for let it be law !
PS: Is that you in the shadows of your Avatar? wow
Give coffee to a drunk and all you get is a wide awake drunk!
[SIGPIC]http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=82706&dateline=137762 0356[/SIGPIC]Linda
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